How do you deal with stalker?

[Dino Velvet]

I can't have dog, only cats which i love.

If the stalker is allergic to bullets then maybe that then. He could probably use a shower anyway.

[yodajazz]

http://scholarlycommons.law.northwes...3&context=jclc

Thanks for the link, I'll read it more in depth, later. But I think those victims, include, those who would have been bored to death by Jehovah Witnesses at their door, if they had not brandished a weapon.

[thombergeron]

http://scholarlycommons.law.northwes...3&context=jclc

In the 20 years since Kleck and Gertz published that paper, its results and methodology have been entirely dismantled, notably by Harvard's David Hemenway. It is no longer considered serious scholarship by anyone outside of the gun lobby.

In 2000, Hemenway published a paper that attempted to replicate Kleck's findings using more rigorous methodology and found that most respondents who reported using a firearm in self-defense were actually using it to intimidate others: http://injuryprevention.bmj.com/cont...4/263.abstract

This review by Stroebe, piblished a few months ago, compiles some of the most recent findings on the relationship between firearm ownership and risk of death: http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/j.avb.2013.07.025

The bottom line is that Kaiti's choice puts her at higher risk of being killed or injured by a firearm than AsianG. It's simply an empirical fact. Best wishes for the health and safety of you both.

[kittyKaiti]

In the 20 years since Kleck and Gertz published that paper, its results and methodology have been entirely dismantled, notably by Harvard's David Hemenway. It is no longer considered serious scholarship by anyone outside of the gun lobby.

In 2000, Hemenway published a paper that attempted to replicate Kleck's findings using more rigorous methodology and found that most respondents who reported using a firearm in self-defense were actually using it to intimidate others: http://injuryprevention.bmj.com/cont...4/263.abstract

This review by Stroebe, piblished a few months ago, compiles some of the most recent findings on the relationship between firearm ownership and risk of death: http://dx.doi.org/10.1016/j.avb.2013.07.025

The bottom line is that Kaiti's choice puts her at higher risk of being killed or injured by a firearm than AsianG. It's simply an empirical fact. Best wishes for the health and safety of you both.

I have to pay money to read one of the links and the other link is dead. Nice try.

As for Hemenway... anyone who would make such a quote like below is obviously heavily biased and therefore his "research" is questionable.

David Hemenway: "Instead of it being the mark of a real man that you can shoot somebody at 50 feet and kill them with a gun, the mark of a real man is that you would never do anything like that. . . . The gun is a great equalizer because it makes wimps as dangerous as people who really have skill and bravery and so I’d like to have this notion that anyone using a gun is a wuss. They aren't anybody to be looked up to. They’re somebody to look down at because they couldn't defend themselves or couldn't protect others without using a gun."

[trish]

Just a few keystrokes and you don't have to pay.

The Hemenway study is here -> http://www.crema-research.ch/abstracts/2014-07.htm

and the Stroebe study is here -> http://www.crema-research.ch/papers/2014-07.pdf

Now, can you get me a free gun, free ammo and some free shooting lessons?

[thombergeron]

I have to pay money to read one of the links and the other link is dead. Nice try.

As for Hemenway... anyone who would make such a quote like below is obviously heavily biased and therefore his "research" is questionable.

David Hemenway: "Instead of it being the mark of a real man that you can shoot somebody at 50 feet and kill them with a gun, the mark of a real man is that you would never do anything like that. . . . The gun is a great equalizer because it makes wimps as dangerous as people who really have skill and bravery and so I’d like to have this notion that anyone using a gun is a wuss. They aren't anybody to be looked up to. They’re somebody to look down at because they couldn't defend themselves or couldn't protect others without using a gun."

Sorry about the links, but I'm at a university and I sometimes forget that I have easier access to scholarly work than most. Thanks to Trish for digging out better access.

With all due respect, Kaiti, everyone is biased. I'm biased, you're biased, Gary Kleck is definitely biased, and yes, David Hemenway also brings a bias to his work.

The trick is to disclose our conflicts and biases so that readers can evaluate our work within the proper context.

David Hemenway is a professor of public health specializing in injury prevention. His bias is toward reducing the public health burden of gun violence. So his bias has led him to focus his research on illuminating the full extent of that burden.

The gun lobby, which certainly referred you to Kleck's paper, has a bias toward selling more firearms. I hope you had a chance to witness NRA president Wayne LaPierre's address to CPAC a couple of weeks ago. He started with dire warnings of the terrorists, rapists, and murderers standing right outside your door, despite the fact that violent crime in the U.S. has declined significantly over the past 20 years. But if you're frightened, you could always just buy another firearm from LaPierre's clients.

It's disheartening that you would dismiss robust scientific results simply because you disagree with them, while at the same time touting the results of a 20-year-old study that has since been empirically disproven. And not only disproven by Hemenway, but also by Phillip Cook, David Webster, Jens Ludwig, and others. It is also notable that Gary Kleck has never responded substantively to any of these critiques, choosing instead, like you, simply to accuse his fellow investigators of "bias."

But bias or no, facts are facts, and it is simply a fact that you have put yourself at risk by bringing a firearm into your home.

[pstratton531]

Thank you everyone for the responds, I didn't know that this thread turned into Gun Control topic LOL. Base from the threat I got it seem like someone who knows me, I live in NYC with strict gun control and I don't think I want to own one, I will reach out to LGBT organization this week and bring all the stuff I need I'm sure they will be able to help me out. I can't let this cyber bully and harassment continue. For now I will ignore those threat but at least I let everyone close to me knows so they are aware of it. I will keep it positive and hope it turn out ok for me, there are so many things going on in my life that make me happy, this bully cannot bring me down, life is too precious to be wasted. I will not let this coward to control my life.

A Man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life.

Hello everyone. I have concern with my safety. Have any of you been dealing with people who constantly send you threatening messages thru email? How do you guys deal with it?

I went to LGBT place in NYC and they gave me a list of organizations I can contact. I'd like some more advice from anyone in here who have been through the similar situation. Thank you in advance.

xxxx

Asian Gee

Sorry to hear this happening to you AsianG. I got threats once- going to file a fake police report on me, going to call my job, watching where I live. All bogus. I started feeling paranoid but it was my imagination. I ignored it and it went away. 2 months ago the person who did it it calls me and fesses up (ex gf). I had blocked her phone for months because she was constantly calling me even though I wasn't calling her back. But then I finally unblocked her # to see if she'd still call me-- nothing for weeks. Then she called me! When I saw the caller-id it was scary, but I'm glad I answered the call. That solved pretty much everything. It taught me that communication is more important than silence and that I shouldn't have shut her out like slamming a door. It made me really realize the difference that talking with one another was better than guessing about one another. We're friends now, and maybe we'll be more than that someday. What kind of threats are you getting? Does the person making the threats know where you live? Did they show up at your place? Maybe it's a jealous girl and her friends-- jealous of your beauty. Please stay safe. The world needs more sweet people like you in it.

[nysprod]

Sorry to hear this happening to you AsianG. I got threats once- going to file a fake police report on me, going to call my job, watching where I live. All bogus. I started feeling paranoid but it was my imagination. I ignored it and it went away. 2 months ago the person who did it it calls me and fesses up (ex gf). I had blocked her phone for months because she was constantly calling me even though I wasn't calling her back. But then I finally unblocked her # to see if she'd still call me-- nothing for weeks. Then she called me! When I saw the caller-id it was scary, but I'm glad I answered the call. That solved pretty much everything. It taught me that communication is more important than silence and that I shouldn't have shut her out like slamming a door. It made me really realize the difference that talking with one another was better than guessing about one another. We're friends now, and maybe we'll be more than that someday. What kind of threats are you getting? Does the person making the threats know where you live? Did they show up at your place? Maybe it's a jealous girl and her friends-- jealous of your beauty. Please stay safe. The world needs more sweet people like you in it.

97% this is utter bullshit...and if it isn't, either the judgement exercised in hoping an ex gf stalker becomes a gf again is seriously deficient, or you're hopelessly desperate.

[Ciffer]

Sorry to hear this happening to you AsianG. I got threats once- going to file a fake police report on me, going to call my job, watching where I live. All bogus. I started feeling paranoid but it was my imagination. I ignored it and it went away. 2 months ago the person who did it it calls me and fesses up (ex gf). I had blocked her phone for months because she was constantly calling me even though I wasn't calling her back. But then I finally unblocked her # to see if she'd still call me-- nothing for weeks. Then she called me! When I saw the caller-id it was scary, but I'm glad I answered the call. That solved pretty much everything. It taught me that communication is more important than silence and that I shouldn't have shut her out like slamming a door. It made me really realize the difference that talking with one another was better than guessing about one another. We're friends now, and maybe we'll be more than that someday. What kind of threats are you getting? Does the person making the threats know where you live? Did they show up at your place? Maybe it's a jealous girl and her friends-- jealous of your beauty. Please stay safe. The world needs more sweet people like you in it.

Pstratton, can I suggest your next screen name? Cellophane......yes you are that transparent. Pathetic........well yeah, you are. Getalife........ etc. Honestly the world needs less people like you in it! Grow up and stop this childish crap already.

[Jackal]

I had a relative who worked for the Federal government who was constantly harassed by a fellow employee. Her supervisor got an FBI agent assigned to keep tabs on her harasser and built a file on him, then one day they showed up at her job and marched this moron out in handcuffs.lol


I'd keep a hard copy record of all the threatening emails etc. and talk to the Human resources person where you work for advice.

In most workplace environments harassment of any kind from another employee is not tolerated and is grounds for immediate dismissal.

If this crap is going on outside the office, I'd arm myself with at least mace and inform the police about your situation.

Great advice. Gee, if you have any friends or relatives or people you trust in law enforcement, seek their advice. They might know someone or know someone who knows someone who can help you directly. I am sorry to hear you are going through this and I hope it ends.