Is it really so bad to live your entire life alone?

[Silcc69]

Bella you should hookup with Steven.

[runningdownthatdream]

No I haven't met anyone from HA, but I meant in general. I don't trust most people here lol (or in real life), but when you meet someone you want to get close to - it takes strength and courage to open yourself up.

.....and that's because love is a battlefield?! sounds like a tremendous cliche and one no doubt well loved by the poets but if you think about it reasonably it's really just another of those stupid things we say to add mysticism to something basic and natural like human inter-relations.

[BellaBellucci]

Aww I feel the same way! It's alright though, life goes on

I know you do, kiddo. You deserve love too tho. And while I empathize with you, you're not a 33-year old transsexual single mother. You have plenty of time and less working against you.

No I haven't met anyone from HA, but I meant in general. I don't trust most people here lol (or in real life), but when you meet someone you want to get close to - it takes strength and courage to open yourself up.

Actually, no. My point is that with these people, it doesn't take strength, it actually takes weakness of will or outright stupidity. This scene is full of vultures. They're everywhere.

.....and that's because love is a battlefield?! sounds like a tremendous cliche and one no doubt well loved by the poets but if you think about it reasonably it's really just another of those stupid things we say to add mysticism to something basic and natural like human inter-relations.

Fucking-A right!

Bella you should hookup with Steven.

Well hey, what took you so long? You cost me a bundle, jackass! My money was on the under!

~BB~

[Dino Velvet]

I've reconnected with my ex by the phone. We're now back to talking a few times a week for up to 2 hours at a time. We've always had a strong bond and I've opened up to her more than anyone because she never judges me. She lives on the other side of the country so I'm not sure where the future leads us. Most of you here who know me can imagine the handful I could be in a relationship. I'm good natured but rarely care about gaining anyone's approval. I care what she thinks though.

[onmyknees]

Nothing wrong with cats...but they're pretty standoffish and independent.....not unlike lots of people. Maybe a puppy is better ! I think it's probably a little early to be pressing the panic button. More than half the relationships start with a promise of life long commitment and giving , and end with bitterness and anger. Imagine going across emotional divide in a few years time? Far be it for me to give relationship advice, but I've had a few....maybe few too many. I would say that unless you're willing to give ( sacrifice) of yourself , maybe you're better off single (but never say alone) I don't think that necessarily means you can't be "true to yourself" but a relationship is about giving, and you may have to give up some or your independence . It's about meeting in the middle, and not everybody's willing to do that to the extent necessary. It's far better to know yourself and come to terms with the reality that you may be somewhat self centered ( not meant in a negative way) than to suppress those feelings and live in an unhappy relationship having lost your identity. I know more than a few ladies who have expressed similar sentiment, and invariably they make bad relationship decisions because of some self induced ticking clock. If you're as stubborn as you say you are ( and I think you are) well.....that's not a trait easily suppressed !

[0utrageousss]

I don't think it matters, we are both strong intelligent, stubborn and opinionated woman. Fact is, men HATE intelligent woman (I laugh when they say intelligence is a turn on) When you really take a look at 90% of women who are spoken for, they aren't the sharpest knives in the drawer to say the least. On top of that, men are weak. We are strong. Water seeks it's own level...

[loveboof]

.....and that's because love is a battlefield?! sounds like a tremendous cliche and one no doubt well loved by the poets but if you think about it reasonably it's really just another of those stupid things we say to add mysticism to something basic and natural like human inter-relations.

No, you're wrong. It is obviously a hard thing to let yourself be vulnerable if you've been hurt in the past, and you have to be a strong person to stay optimistic and open.

Imo your cynicism is simply easier than having to face up to your emotional inhibitions and insecurities...

[BellaBellucci]

I don't think it matters, we are both strong intelligent, stubborn and opinionated woman. Fact is, men HATE intelligent woman (I laugh when they say intelligence is a turn on) When you really take a look at 90% of women who are spoken for, they aren't the sharpest knives in the drawer to say the least. On top of that, men are weak. We are strong. Water seeks it's own level...

Pretty much. Welcome to the irony of life: if you're a woman, the more you improve yourself, the less viable of a partner you become because most people have a million insecurities.

Imo your cynicism is simply easier than having to face up to your emotional inhibitions and insecurities...

More often than not people have these issues because their trust has been betrayed, and sometimes, people go through life being betrayed by nearly everyone, i.e. a good many transwomen (which is why you guys need to lighten up on them). How can you trust under those circumstances, and a better question is why should you? Is it really worth the cost of admission?

~BB~

[Dino Velvet]

I think it's more the overly-opinionated than intelligence that us fellas shy away from. Nothing wrong with a smart gal but someone who makes a Federal Case out of the most trivial things is a pain in the butt. You probably don't like guys that are drama queens either.

[runningdownthatdream]

I don't think it matters, we are both strong intelligent, stubborn and opinionated woman. Fact is, men HATE intelligent woman (I laugh when they say intelligence is a turn on) When you really take a look at 90% of women who are spoken for, they aren't the sharpest knives in the drawer to say the least. On top of that, men are weak. We are strong. Water seeks it's own level...

You're making yet another generalization - while I can't speak for all men I can definitively say that intelligent women turn me on (although a great ass and killer eyes are occasional substitutes ). In my experience, though, women dumb themselves down to the level they THINK men want them to be at. Men will happily oblige fulfilling the caveman role because it's damn easy to do.

I think we need to challenge the traditional roles of men and women and the value of those roles within society. We've honed relationships down to power struggles where both parties know what the other party expects and so most people have just become emotional automatons......but then again maybe I think that way because I'm spending too much time alone!