Why are many admirers flaky?

[sophiebendable]

Now I'm not generalizing about everyone because I know there are lots of good guys out there, but in my experience I've found men who are into transsexual women to be unbearably flaky. It's pretty much at the point where I don't even want to correspond with anyone I meet online for too long because of how many times it has ended with me being stood up after we finally arrange a time to meet. I transitioned at a late enough age to understand the extent to which men's sexual desires are policed and the pressure and shame that goes along with this. I understand that to many guys, girls like me are scary fantasies who they've only seen in porn. I just wish they would think more about how inconsiderate it is, how it effects my life, and yeah also how it makes me feel about myself :(

xo,
Sophie

[Westheangelino]

You have to understand that most men who are admirers have intense issues regarding their desires. Usually it is something they keep from friends and (as evidenced by BILLIONS of posts on this board) are wrestling with questions such as: am I gay? So, some dudes just can't bite the bullet and give in to what they want. However, their shit is not your shit. So, I totally agree that it is rude. Gentleman, girls are not your therapy! Get over your bullshit and THEN start interacting with people. We sometimes forget that the people on the other end of the net or the phone are real people. Don't.

[irvin66]

I could not agree more with you. Some of us are afraid of the unknown and some have only experience with genetic girls. Think if some of those we know will find out that we admire tgirls, it's fucking scary....:geek:

[sophiebendable]

Thanks, guys. I really appreciate your insight. Like I said, I do know what it's like to be closeted about your sexual desires and to question your identity because of it. Before I transitioned I was a submissive bottom, but still mainly interested in women. I watched a ton of tranny porn…and still do ;) But the thing is, while that was hard, it's still way harder for me to date now. And I'm not even talking about the flakiness, more about having to think about the possibility of violence as well as all the stereotypes applied to me based on utter ignorance. I just wish more admirers would realize that— that I can relate to them, but also that things might be really hard for me too. Like Westheangelino said, I think it's really about just remembering that even though we might be your fantasy, we're also real people.

[Westheangelino]

It's not that scary. What is more scary to me is being a prisoner of your own desires. It's not something I bandy about, but if someone asks me a direct question, I'll answer truthfully.

The conversation usually goes like this:

"Um, I keep getting friend suggestions on facebook to friend these hot girls because we have mutual friend, and then I realize they're trannies!"

"Yeah...and?"

"So, you know them?"

"Some of them I have met in person, others I just friended because I like their work."

"So...you like trannies?"

"Yup."

"Um....you fuck trannies?"

"Oh, yeah."

"So, are you gay?"

"Nope."

"Hmmm. Ok."


And then nothing eventful happens at all. My true friends find me more interesting because of my experiences. Those I wouldn't be good friends with anyways either don't seem to care or just put it in the category of why we are not friends in the first place. I've never made an enemy because of my sexual proclivities.

[Jericho]

Because some of the chicks we're into are batshit crazy! :shrug

[giovanni_hotel]

The sad fact is sometimes it takes years if at all for many admirers/chasers to come to terms with their sexual attraction to transgendered women. Many are still going to be conflicted about it.
IMO the more TG women an admirer interacts with, the more comfortable he becomes with his own sexuality.

From personal experience, I know the first time I had a dick in my mouth it was attached to a trans-chick, and I felt the dueling conflicting emotions of exhilaration/confusion/guilt/euphoria/shame/paranoia all at the same time.

Thankfully the girl I was with brought me back down to my new 'normal'.
It's the identity crisis most admirers have a hard time coping with initially.

[caliuncut]

Now I'm not generalizing about everyone because I know there are lots of good guys out there, but in my experience I've found men who are into transsexual women to be unbearably flaky. It's pretty much at the point where I don't even want to correspond with anyone I meet online for too long because of how many times it has ended with me being stood up after we finally arrange a time to meet. I transitioned at a late enough age to understand the extent to which men's sexual desires are policed and the pressure and shame that goes along with this. I understand that to many guys, girls like me are scary fantasies who they've only seen in porn. I just wish they would think more about how inconsiderate it is, how it effects my life, and yeah also how it makes me feel about myself :(

xo,
Sophie

Sophie - It sucks to read your post and it honestly kinda pisses me off that people are still so flakey in this day and age. I've been flaked on a few times and it freaking sucks, but honestly it's really an indictment of what a shit person the other party is as opposed to a shortcoming on your end.

Oh and you are just my type so it pisses me off even more to think someone has an opportunity to spend time with you and they flake!!!

[caliuncut]

Shit Sophie, just saw your pics on your profile....I've died and realized heaven is 3000 miles away in nyc...lol

[GrimFusion]

I don't try to hide what I do, and I've had friends and family ask why I have a few transgirls added over my facebook and myspace accounts. I've had to distance myself from my aunt, my cousin, and an old friend from high school because the conversation has come up and gone sour. I'm sure I'll probably get some flack off of admirers "smart" enough to keep all of that on the down low and avoid the conflict, but in my opinion; that's no better than lying. Save for the few bad apples, none of my ex's have ever had a problem with it and most of my friends are aware, but it isn't an issue and doesn't come up in conversation.

I'm sorry you've run into so many problems just trying to keep up with dudes, Sophie. Practically everything everyone has said in this thread so far is true. There's no useful or proper way to sort out the time-wasters from respectful admirers. When it comes down to it, some guys will say anything necessary and be whomever they imagine you're looking for. The game is just flipping through the deck of cards until you find one that suits your hand best. Good luck finding a respectful dude. That wasn't sarcasm; they do exist.

[altarica]

As you said not all guys are "Flakey" but a high number are.There are I am sure plenty of reasons for this. Having desires that they want to satisfy but are too scared to actually act upon. I'm sure that a lot of guys masturbate to their T-Girl fantasies or porn and after they cum then the guilt sets in for not seeming to conform to the "Norm", whatever that may be for them. Of course the same thing happens to a lot of guys when they go through with the real thing, the cum and run artists. The guilt can be huge.

The pressure to stay inside what society in general deems to be normal is huge, as is pressure from family and friends.

For me personally, my sexuality seems to have become more fluid with the passing of the years. I am totally comfortable with who I am and my likes and desires.

My reasons for loving T-Girls so much is that their femininity is much more pronounced than that of regular genetic girls. Plus they do know how to have a good time, be it in a club and social situation,in the bedroom or in front of my camera. They revel in their femininity and seem to enjoy it all the more.

As a photographer it's obviously not in my interest to be unreliable or make excuses not to meet. I go to quite a few clubs and am fairly well known in certain circles.

Another problem is that a lot of guys seem to think that the girls are basically just pieces of meat, there to satisfy guys sexual urges. This is not the case and girls deserve to be treated with kindness and respect, whoever they are. For me it's as much, if not more of a social and work thing than sexual, though I don't often pass on offers of sex. I always think of any girl I talk to or meet as a woman, not a guy in a dress, be it on-line chat or in real life. All my close friends are in T-World some way or another and they are all good loyal friends. My best friend is a T-Girl who dresses her age, mid 50s and who I have no problem going out with day or night in public, in fact a few people have thought we were man and wife. We were lovers but have moved past that to something much much deeper.

As for keeping it on the lowdown. I don't feel the need to broadcast my sexuality or interests, but don't deny then either. I keep 2 FB profiles, one for my vanilla friends and family and one for my T-World friends, not out of shame but it just makes life easier.

[littletwink]

What you describe is not at all uncommon.

There's no shortage of reasons, but guys that often show a high degree of interest in trannies have their own little club. They are tranny CHASERS. They love the chase and the fantasy of meeting up, but don't like actually following through.

Also many guys are whores. They go after multiple women, trans or gg, at the same time. A guy can be really into you for weeks, but never lets you in on the fact he's having similar convos with another GG or TG. He meant to go out with you, but was out on a date with someone else.

[GrimFusion]

What you describe is not at all uncommon.

There's no shortage of reasons, but guys that often show a high degree of interest in trannies have their own little club. They are tranny CHASERS. They love the chase and the fantasy of meeting up, but don't like actually following through.

Also many guys are whores. They go after multiple women, trans or gg, at the same time. A guy can be really into you for weeks, but never lets you in on the fact he's having similar convos with another GG or TG. He meant to go out with you, but was out on a date with someone else.

I think you got the wrong idea of what a chaser is. A chaser is a dude who 'chases' after any transsexual chick no matter how she looks with no attention paid to personality or individualism. Chasers don't usually flake; they take what they can get and more often than not boast about it afterward as if it were some kind of ego-boosting conquest. Chasers don't usually waste time trying to meet up just to hang out.

If a dude flakes on a meetup, it's probably because he's trying to keep it stealth, not because he's a chaser. Stealth guys have different motivations; sometimes it is their own sexual insecurities and the inability to come to terms with them. Sometimes it's pressure from peers and a reluctance to admit an interest for fear of exclusion or conflict, and sometimes the dude's just trying to hide an affair from his wife or significant other.

[Christastic]

It's the closet, basically.

[littletwink]

I think you got the wrong idea of what a chaser is. A chaser is a dude who 'chases' after any transsexual chick no matter how she looks with no attention paid to personality or individualism. Chasers don't usually flake; they take what they can get and more often than not boast about it afterward as if it were some kind of ego-boosting conquest. Chasers don't usually waste time trying to meet up just to hang out.

If a dude flakes on a meetup, it's probably because he's trying to keep it stealth, not because he's a chaser. Stealth guys have different motivations; sometimes it is their own sexual insecurities and the inability to come to terms with them. Sometimes it's pressure from peers and a reluctance to admit an interest for fear of exclusion or conflict, and sometimes the dude's just trying to hide an affair from his wife or significant other.

You're right. I was so excited about getting to the part where I could say many of us are whores that I completely jacked up the chaser description. lol

[Rusty Eldora]

As you said not all guys are "Flakey" but a high number are.There are I am sure plenty of reasons for this. Having desires that they want to satisfy but are too scared to actually act upon.

For me personally, my sexuality seems to have become more fluid with the passing of the years. I am totally comfortable with who I am and my likes and desires.

Another problem is that a lot of guys seem to think that the girls are basically just pieces of meat, there to satisfy guys sexual urges. This is not the case and girls deserve to be treated with kindness and respect, whoever they are. For me it's as much, if not more of a social and work thing than sexual, though I don't often pass on offers of sex. I always think of any girl I talk to or meet as a woman, not a guy in a dress, be it on-line chat or in real life.


Great post altarica, I know from the gg escort scene there are a huge number of flakes, even though the boards I am on the ladies ask for references to even book with them. Drop down to the Backpage group, it is much worse. This is for guys that just want meat with gg females, before adding the TG issues in their mind.

I too have gotten way more comfortable with myself, I got there about 5 years ago, well past 50.

I think guys that have limited exposure to TGs haven't even gotten to appreciating the woman as they would a gg escort. They are still very hung up in the "Is this OK, am I Bi, or am I Gay?". As all the porn appears to be pictures, it might not be real, still have a lot to learn that the person they are with has gotten comfortable with their sexuality and they should too.

Strangely, I think I got comfortable with Tgirls once I realized they were persons I enjoyed being with.

[Rabbiteyes]

Some guys seem to have gender issues also. I was dating one guy who eventually revealed to me he wanted to transition too ~_~ He had dated a lot of transgender people and I guess he was trying to kind of live vicariously through them / me ~_~

[Dino Velvet]

Some guys seem to have gender issues also. I was dating one guy who eventually revealed to me he wanted to transition too ~_~ He had dated a lot of transgender people and I guess he was trying to kind of live vicariously through them / me ~_~

If he's furiously writing in his journal after probing speculation that could be a bad omen too.

[MsDazzler]

I agree... I remember one night where I had sex with a guy after meeting him at a club and getting drunk and we slept together afterwards, in the morning, he practically bolted like a rabbit without saying so much. He was into his clothes so fast and out the door before I could wink.

Shame, guilt.... it is a terrible thing.

[canihavu]

Because some of the chicks we're into are batshit crazy! :shrug


That has been my experience, lol. Many seem to be more into guys who are not into trannies instead of the guys who are.

[sophiebendable]

That has been my experience, lol. Many seem to be more into guys who are not into trannies instead of the guys who are.

Um, any man who is dating us is by definition "into trannies." If you want to understand the phenomena you're describing, perhaps you should examine some of the negative stereotypes surrounding admirers and how these behaviors (like the one being discussed in this thread) might affect us. I think the women you are referring to are basically thinking, "Gee, I wish most of the men who are into me could just act like regular guys and not treat me like crap most of the time because I'm trans."

[MsDazzler]

That has been my experience, lol. Many seem to be more into guys who are not into trannies instead of the guys who are.

Exactly - I can just feel the difference in the vibe, actions, etc from guys who were into me because I am trans, and guys who were into me because I was a woman.

[nysprod]

Um, any man who is dating us is by definition "into trannies." If you want to understand the phenomena you're describing, perhaps you should examine some of the negative stereotypes surrounding admirers and how these behaviors (like the one being discussed in this thread) might affect us. I think the women you are referring to are basically thinking, "Gee, I wish most of the men who are into me could just act like regular guys and not treat me like crap most of the time because I'm trans."

Let me ask you something...you started this thread, you make it sound like guys like me are a bunch of wackos, and then there you are running an ad on the forum looking for a sugardaddy...so I think that in order to fully explore your topic, I would say that putting you into the conversation of who is flaky would seem to make sense...

[sophiebendable]

Let me ask you something...you started this thread, you make it sound like guys like me are a bunch of wackos, and then there you are running an ad on the forum looking for a sugardaddy...so I think that in order to fully explore your topic, I would say that putting you into the conversation of who is flaky would seem to make sense...

I did make clear in my original post that there are plenty of admirers who don't meet that stereotype. You can see many of them on this thread— they're the ones who, unlike you, were able to find a way to reply to me respectfully. I never said admirers were "a bunch of wackos." Sounds like that's you voicing own lousy self-image.

And I don't see at all how the fact that I'm looking for a sugar daddy makes me flaky. Flaky is a synonym for unreliable.

[Rabbiteyes]

Exactly - I can just feel the difference in the vibe, actions, etc from guys who were into me because I am trans, and guys who were into me because I was a woman.

Yea... the guys who typically approach me (because of the trans) are WAYY more perverted / forward.

Within the first conversation, 99 percent of the time they start to talk about what is in my pants...or asking what kind of sex I like.

A man approaching a woman would never talk like that (because, well, they know the woman would just block them and move on). But, because we are trans, they figure it is completely open season to jump right into the sex.

I even had a few guys tell me directly that it was so great that I was transitioning, because that meant I was embracing my desire to please men better ... wtf....

[nysprod]

I did make clear in my original post that there are plenty of admirers who don't meet that stereotype.

Lip service. Why start a negative thread at all then?


You can see many of them on this thread— they're the ones who, unlike you, were able to find a way to reply to me respectfully.

Those who want respect, give respect.


I never said admirers were "a bunch of wackos." Sounds like that's you voicing own lousy self-image.

What I said was that's the way you sound...flaky...wacko...semantics...


And I don't see at all how the fact that I'm looking for a sugar daddy makes me flaky. Flaky is a synonym for unreliable.

Lol...whatever...

[MsDazzler]

Yea... the guys who typically approach me (because of the trans) are WAYY more perverted / forward.

Within the first conversation, 99 percent of the time they start to talk about what is in my pants...or asking what kind of sex I like.

A man approaching a woman would never talk like that (because, well, they know the woman would just block them and move on). But, because we are trans, they figure it is completely open season to jump right into the sex.

I even had a few guys tell me directly that it was so great that I was transitioning, because that meant I was embracing my desire to please men better ... wtf....

Amen to that!

The conversations with men who are attracted to me because I am trans are much more sexually charged (on their part, anyway).

And ironically, even some of the men who first liked me because I was a woman then found out I was trans... the scope/shift of their conversation immediately turned to sex. FML

[canihavu]

Um, any man who is dating us is by definition "into trannies." If you want to understand the phenomena you're describing, perhaps you should examine some of the negative stereotypes surrounding admirers and how these behaviors (like the one being discussed in this thread) might affect us. I think the women you are referring to are basically thinking, "Gee, I wish most of the men who are into me could just act like regular guys and not treat me like crap most of the time because I'm trans."


I don't know what they are thinking, I am just relating my experience with said women.

[Rabbiteyes]

And ironically, even some of the men who first liked me because I was a woman then found out I was trans... the scope/shift of their conversation immediately turned to sex. FML

Lol I had that too.

Even worse actually... I had guys I was chatting to professionally (colleagues) who were just talking about work and being decent normal people (when they thought I was a woman)... but when I revealed I was actually trans, suddenly it was sex.

That is the number one issue with guys... if they don't treat me with respect (which means acting like a decent normal human being for a while), they never see me.

I'm a professional. A business degree, highly trained artist, I own my company... how does any guy get the idea they could talk to me like that out of the blue just because I'm trans? Hellll no. Especially not from some guy working as a waiter or barely making rent ~_~

[stallion79]

I've flaked out on a few people in the past and I've had people flake out on me as well. It has worked both ways in my own life. The reasons why I've flaked are various, and include not yet being ready for a relationship or being too afraid to get into a relationship. I'm sure I've missed out on some good times, maybe some heartbreak too. I don't know.

Back in 2009, I had been seeing a very attractive young lady. She was Puerto Rican and very vivacious and fun to be around. We had met up a few times and had a few good dates, but when we were finally ready to be "exclusive" I flaked out of the relationship. I have been regularly dating t-girls for the better part of a decade, and I still don't know why I flaked out of that relationship. Maybe things happened too fast for me, or maybe I just wasn't ready to settle down. I don't know. It's a regret that I have that I must live with. I'm left to wonder about what might have been.

On the converse, I remember a very pretty young thing (a rather Dita-like young woman) flaked out on me, and that hurt me pretty badly. I was still a pretty young guy, and I have always been willing to be seen in public with a transgender gf, so I don't know exactly what I did wrong. Maybe she wasn't in the right frame of mind. Maybe I disrespected her somehow or I wasn't treating her how she wanted to be treated. But she flaked on the relationship, and I had to deal with that.

[MsDazzler]

Hmm... actually... I have noticed that if it is a bar date, men tends to flake out more often than if it was at my place or his place...

but for safety's sake, I usually insist on meeting in a public place, which, of course, is what most closeted men do not want so they usually flake out.

However, I'd rather be flaked out on than be sexually assaulted or even worse, murdered in my own place or his place during that first meeting.

I've been coerced into having sex few times when the man would meet me directly at my place right away off Internet. No more.

Experience is a bitter pill!

[Westheangelino]

I've defended one side, so I will defend the other as well as the conversation has developed. In defense of the flakes, you never really know what is on the other side of that door until you're in the room.

Case in point, I put up a CL ad for a hung top. To my delight, a very well known porn star answered and wanted me to come to her place. Even though it was just for fun and she wanted to fuck around, she has spent so long in the game that I'm not sure that she still knows how to interact with anyone without acting like an escort. So, imagine being told to park near an intersection, give a call, then come up some stairs and look for the cracked door. Some dudes would bolt somewhere in that process. Luckily, she was everything I had ever hoped for and waaaay more, and the whole situation was legit. However, there have been a couple times where I just got an incredibly bad feeling, powered through, and then had to swiftly exit upon meeting because the looks and/or personality were so far removed than what was presented via email.

[canihavu]

Hmm... actually... I have noticed that if it is a bar date, men tends to flake out more often than if it was at my place or his place...

but for safety's sake, I usually insist on meeting in a public place, which, of course, is what most closeted men do not want so they usually flake out.

However, I'd rather be flaked out on than be sexually assaulted or even worse, murdered in my own place or his place during that first meeting.

I've been coerced into having sex few times when the man would meet me directly at my place right away off Internet. No more.

Experience is a bitter pill!


Wow that's truly sad that you had to experience something like that. :mad:

[sophiebendable]

Yup, the flakiness I was talking about has been when planning to meet for dinner or drinks. I often assume it is because they didn't want to be seen with me...

[Westheangelino]

^ Ah, gotcha. Well, in that case there is no defense as far as I'm concerned.

[aboutthezote]

Whenever I use CL looking for xdresser/ TS all I get is middle aged guys who want me to supply the clothes and dress them..."you get me some panties and I'll let you fuck me..."

On the rare occasions I do get someone close to genuine they flake as soon as I propose a meeting. I think a lot of people respond to CL ads whilst they are wanking... which to be fair is a bit of a skill.

My fault for living in the middle of nowhere.

[caliuncut]

I think there are valid points in pretty much everyone's posts. I think the thing to keep in mind here is that in the olden days...people were flakes too but its just heightened in the age of the interwebs as it increases the people we meet and talk to tenfold hence increasing the run ins with flakes. However, I for one know I've met many truly amazing people and had amazing experiences that would never ever have happened were it not for me sifting and wading through the fakes and flakes.

[MdR Dave]

Even worse actually... I had guys I was chatting to professionally (colleagues) who were just talking about work and being decent normal people (when they thought I was a woman)... but when I revealed I was actually trans, suddenly it was sex... how does any guy get the idea they could talk to me like that out of the blue just because I'm trans? Hellll no. Especially not from some guy working as a waiter or barely making rent ~_~

That last part made me lol.

[nysprod]

Case in point, I put up a CL ad for a hung top. To my delight, a very well known porn star answered and wanted me to come to her place.

To my recollection, you've posted a few other of these hard-to-believe comments...CL, with a collection of freaks that I wouldn't touch with my worst enemy's dick and lo and behold, a "well known porn star" answers your ad and just found you impossible to resist?

[nysprod]

I've been coerced into having sex few times when the man would meet me directly at my place right away off Internet. No more.Experience is a bitter pill!

So, you're not a porn star or escort, and you work with kids. But you invite total strangers to your place and allow yourself to get "coerced" into having sex? Something's missing...

[Westheangelino]

To my recollection, you've posted a few other of these hard-to-believe comments...CL, with a collection of freaks that I wouldn't touch with my worst enemy's dick and lo and behold, a "well known porn star" answers your ad and just found you impossible to resist?

You can believe it or not believe, I really don't care. I'm not someone who gets my jollies by embellishing things on the internet. And you really don't understand the situation or how peoples' minds work sometimes. Do you know any TS porn stars? Have a conversation with one for once. It's not rocket science.

[Rabbiteyes]

So, you're not a porn star or escort, and you work with kids. But you invite total strangers to your place and allow yourself to get "coerced" into having sex? Something's missing...

Yea... it happens. Guys will completely lie to you to get you in a vulnerable position and then manipulate you into sex.

Maybe it sounds strange to a guy who has never been in such a situation.

[nysprod]

Yea... it happens. Guys will completely lie to you to get you in a vulnerable position and then manipulate you into sex.

Maybe it sounds strange to a guy who has never been in such a situation.

What lie can someone tell you that will convince you to invite a total stranger off the internet to your place?

[nysprod]

You can believe it or not believe, I really don't care. I'm not someone who gets my jollies by embellishing things on the internet. And you really don't understand the situation or how peoples' minds work sometimes. Do you know any TS porn stars? Have a conversation with one for once. It's not rocket science.

It's not the talking...it's the idea that with one ad on CL, a famous porn star responds...and then just finds you so irresistible they have to run right over and fuck you...

[Westheangelino]

It's not the talking...it's the idea that with one ad on CL, a famous porn star responds...and then just finds you so irresistible they have to run right over and fuck you...


Obviously you didn't even read what I wrote. I post ads ALL the time. Over the past six/seven years, I will readily admit that I have posted hundreds of ads. It takes seconds, costs nothing, and can lead to a LOT of fun. So, why not? How many "stars" have I met by them replying to my ad? Three. Law of averages ,sir, and living in L.A. helps quite a bit. It also helps having a hot ass, great personality, and charm.

[MsDazzler]

So, you're not a porn star or escort, and you work with kids. But you invite total strangers to your place and allow yourself to get "coerced" into having sex? Something's missing...

That was when I was way younger back in my college days and before I ever started my job. lol.

[nysprod]

That was when I was way younger back in my college days and before I ever started my job. lol.

Lol...or maybe you're just like the rest of us in the sense that the "face" we present to world is quite different than what lies behind the mask...

[Westheangelino]

Lol...or maybe you're just like the rest of us in the sense that the "face" we present to world is quite different than what lies behind the mask...

Nope. What you see is what you get.

[nysprod]

Nope. What you see is what you get.

Lol...I left that comment for MzDazzler...

[ditadior]

I've flaked out on a few people in the past and I've had people flake out on me as well. It has worked both ways in my own life. The reasons why I've flaked are various, and include not yet being ready for a relationship or being too afraid to get into a relationship. I'm sure I've missed out on some good times, maybe some heartbreak too. I don't know.

Back in 2009, I had been seeing a very attractive young lady. She was Puerto Rican and very vivacious and fun to be around. We had met up a few times and had a few good dates, but when we were finally ready to be "exclusive" I flaked out of the relationship. I have been regularly dating t-girls for the better part of a decade, and I still don't know why I flaked out of that relationship. Maybe things happened too fast for me, or maybe I just wasn't ready to settle down. I don't know. It's a regret that I have that I must live with. I'm left to wonder about what might have been.

On the converse, I remember a very pretty young thing (a rather Dita-like young woman) flaked out on me, and that hurt me pretty badly. I was still a pretty young guy, and I have always been willing to be seen in public with a transgender gf, so I don't know exactly what I did wrong. Maybe she wasn't in the right frame of mind. Maybe I disrespected her somehow or I wasn't treating her how she wanted to be treated. But she flaked on the relationship, and I had to deal with that.

dita like?

[stallion79]

dita like?

Young, pretty, energetic, good personality -- aka, the total package. That was meant as a compliment to you!

[ditadior]

Young, pretty, energetic, good personality -- aka, the total package. That was meant as a compliment to you!

your sweet thank you.
deffinatly have me smiling before i lay my head down to sleep tonight ;) xoxox

[Chaos]

I've never flaked on anyone,but then it's not like I get any chances living where I do to date anyone really..

[runround04]

Yup, the flakiness I was talking about has been when planning to meet for dinner or drinks. I often assume it is because they didn't want to be seen with me...

If they chatted with you, made arrangements then flaked out, they clearly arent that bright and theres a good chance they just got lost in their own house. As they say, its their loss, not yours so forget about em and move on to find someone better that wont waste your time.

[sophiebendable]

Ugh, stood up again :( I'm afraid this is going to turn me into a manhater...

[caliuncut]

That fuckin sucks...too bad you're not la la land, I would neeeeeever leave you hangin...lol