Bicycology
03-17-2006, 09:12 PM
Official "I'm on Myspace but I'm not a dumbass" Rules
If you want to continue being on myspace and also continue not being a dumbass, then you need to obey the following rules:
1. Delete Tom... he's not your friend, and I promise you that he won't notice if you delete him.
2. Never under any circumstances is it acceptable to say "thanks for the add," unless of course you're a dumbass.
3. Put a fucking picture up.
4. "You're" is a contraction meaning "you are." "Your" is a pronoun meaning "belonging to you." Similarly, "they're" is a contraction meaning "they are," "their" is a pronoun meaning "belonging to them," and "there" is an adjective describing a location that is away from "here."
5. Rofl is what a retarded dog says. It has no use in communication between two human beings.
*6. Myspace will never figure out if you failed to repost a bulletin. Therefore your profile will not be deleted. Although maybe it should be if you're stupid enough to believe it.*
7. The Trifecta is a perfectly good reason to celebrate. (Trifecta- new comment, new message, and new friend request at the same time.)
8. If you put up a fake job title, someone from your work is going to find your page. So let's stop with this "executive consultative assistant of regional administrative operations" shit. You're a fucking secretary.
9. Bands do not belong on your top 8 unless you are personally acquainted with the members of the band and you regularly spend time in their physical presence. I like Incubus, but that doesn't make them one of my 8 best friends.
10. Deleting someone off your top 8 is not the ultimate insult that you can bestow upon someone. If someone cheats on you, taking them off your top 8 does not make it even. Having sex with their best friend/ roommate/ new girlfriend/ new boyfriend/ sister/ brother/ mother does!
**11. Forwarding a stupid message/bulletin that says that you will have bad luck or never have sex again if you don't forward it is just plain fucking rude! It's like your neighbor's dog shits in your yard and you call your friend, invite them over, and then when they get there handing them a paper towel and asking them to pick up your neighbor's shit. Fucking stop it.**
12. If you constantly post comments on someone's site and they never comment back, that means THEY DON'T FUCKING LIKE YOU. Get the fucking clue. This is especially true if you are ugly.
If you don't repost this bulletin I will personally come to your house and punch you in the balls/ovaries
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10 reasons to get off MYSpace!!!!
1. You are at a bar or club and you suddenly realize you recognize someone. You can't figure out how and then it dawns on you... You have never met this person before, but have spent a considerable amount of time looking at their Myspace.
2. After meeting someone your conversation somehow leads to - "So, are you on Myspace?"
3. You do not call people anymore, you post comments and send messages through Myspace
4. When talking about one of your friends you just refer to them as "what do you get for 10 dollars" rather than their real name.
5. When you're out with friends and you take a good picture you exclaim loudly, "That's going on Myspace!"
6. Conversations with friends tend to lead to, "Did you read that bulletin/comment/ or see that new picture 'Cuddlemaria' left?"
7. You check your Myspace as soon as you wake up, and right before you go to bed, including the 10 times you check it during the day.
8. You know people who have gotten offended about the Top 8.
9. You start off intending to check if you have new messages/comments but find AN HOUR LATER that you are still on and have no idea what you even accomplished during that time except stalk.
10. You find yourself laughing (sadly) and agreeing as you read these, and you know you're going to repost this for everyone else to see."
->Guilty!
If you want to continue being on myspace and also continue not being a dumbass, then you need to obey the following rules:
1. Delete Tom... he's not your friend, and I promise you that he won't notice if you delete him.
2. Never under any circumstances is it acceptable to say "thanks for the add," unless of course you're a dumbass.
3. Put a fucking picture up.
4. "You're" is a contraction meaning "you are." "Your" is a pronoun meaning "belonging to you." Similarly, "they're" is a contraction meaning "they are," "their" is a pronoun meaning "belonging to them," and "there" is an adjective describing a location that is away from "here."
5. Rofl is what a retarded dog says. It has no use in communication between two human beings.
*6. Myspace will never figure out if you failed to repost a bulletin. Therefore your profile will not be deleted. Although maybe it should be if you're stupid enough to believe it.*
7. The Trifecta is a perfectly good reason to celebrate. (Trifecta- new comment, new message, and new friend request at the same time.)
8. If you put up a fake job title, someone from your work is going to find your page. So let's stop with this "executive consultative assistant of regional administrative operations" shit. You're a fucking secretary.
9. Bands do not belong on your top 8 unless you are personally acquainted with the members of the band and you regularly spend time in their physical presence. I like Incubus, but that doesn't make them one of my 8 best friends.
10. Deleting someone off your top 8 is not the ultimate insult that you can bestow upon someone. If someone cheats on you, taking them off your top 8 does not make it even. Having sex with their best friend/ roommate/ new girlfriend/ new boyfriend/ sister/ brother/ mother does!
**11. Forwarding a stupid message/bulletin that says that you will have bad luck or never have sex again if you don't forward it is just plain fucking rude! It's like your neighbor's dog shits in your yard and you call your friend, invite them over, and then when they get there handing them a paper towel and asking them to pick up your neighbor's shit. Fucking stop it.**
12. If you constantly post comments on someone's site and they never comment back, that means THEY DON'T FUCKING LIKE YOU. Get the fucking clue. This is especially true if you are ugly.
If you don't repost this bulletin I will personally come to your house and punch you in the balls/ovaries
----------------------------------------
10 reasons to get off MYSpace!!!!
1. You are at a bar or club and you suddenly realize you recognize someone. You can't figure out how and then it dawns on you... You have never met this person before, but have spent a considerable amount of time looking at their Myspace.
2. After meeting someone your conversation somehow leads to - "So, are you on Myspace?"
3. You do not call people anymore, you post comments and send messages through Myspace
4. When talking about one of your friends you just refer to them as "what do you get for 10 dollars" rather than their real name.
5. When you're out with friends and you take a good picture you exclaim loudly, "That's going on Myspace!"
6. Conversations with friends tend to lead to, "Did you read that bulletin/comment/ or see that new picture 'Cuddlemaria' left?"
7. You check your Myspace as soon as you wake up, and right before you go to bed, including the 10 times you check it during the day.
8. You know people who have gotten offended about the Top 8.
9. You start off intending to check if you have new messages/comments but find AN HOUR LATER that you are still on and have no idea what you even accomplished during that time except stalk.
10. You find yourself laughing (sadly) and agreeing as you read these, and you know you're going to repost this for everyone else to see."
->Guilty!