"Ain't Like We Ain't Kin And All"

[Dino Velvet]

My father's side is 100% Russian but on my mom's side there's a gaggle of Hillbillies from West Texas who think they have free hotel rooms every time they come to LA. They look like they're kept together with banjo strings and ignorance too.

There's this Japanese proverb, "Guests like fish. After 3 days they start to smell." I was going to tell them this but talk like that is too subtle for those mutants. I might be a Christian but they're Bible Thumpers who believe The Bible word for word mainly because they can't think for themselves. They sit in a chair like White Trash Royalty making judgements about me as they enjoy the free hospitality.

I hate them now. These Hayseeds are worse than Bin Laden. At least Osama didn't try to use my house as a hotel.

Happily, I now have my house back after 6 agonizing days. I'm about to piss in every corner and begin to retake my territory.

[Erika1487]

My father's side is 100% Russian but on my mom's side there's a gaggle of Hillbillies from West Texas who think they have free hotel rooms every time they come to LA. They look like they're kept together with banjo strings and ignorance too.

There's this Japanese proverb, "Guests like fish. After 3 days they start to smell." I was going to tell them this but talk like that is too subtle for those mutants. I might be a Christian but they're Bible Thumpers who believe The Bible word for word mainly because they can't think for themselves. They sit in a chair like White Trash Royalty making judgements about me as they enjoy the free hospitality.

I hate them now. These Hayseeds are worse than Bin Laden. At least Osama didn't try to use my house as a hotel.

Happily, I now have my house back after 6 agonizing days. I'm about to piss in every corner and begin to retake my territory.

Oh Dino you always put a sime on my face:Bowdown:

I used to think I was a redneck until I visted my cousin down in Boone co WV
All I can say is wow. They would make your family look like the kardashian's :)

[russtafa]

hey Dino are they like the Beverly Hillbillies we don't have hillbillies in Aus

[maaarc]

sumatter Dino taint got no love for ya kin folk? did they make ya squeal like a pig forin they left your homestead :) ya'll should never have told um about the coprophagia - stuff like that will flat out rattle some folks:salad

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tqxzWdKKu8

[robertlouis]

hey Dino are they like the Beverly Hillbillies we don't have hillbillies in Aus

Never been to Queensland then, Russ? :)

[russtafa]

Yes the gold coast with my ex?

[theone1982]

I'm right there with you Dino, my friend. I can't stand most of my family, and I dread holidays just for that reason. Nothing like people who think they can tell you what to do just because fate caused you to be related to them.

[Yvonne183]

Texas Hillbiilies,, West Virginia hillbillies,,,ha ha ha,, they ain't nothing compared to my Cajun relatives from the swamps of Louisiana. I just visited them last year for the first time and i gotta say,, they kinda scared me.

[Ineeda SM]

LMAO. Welcome back Yvonne. We missed you.

[theone1982]

Texas Hillbiilies,, West Virginia hillbillies,,,ha ha ha,, they ain't nothing compared to my Cajun relatives from the swamps of Louisiana. I just visited them last year for the first time and i gotta say,, they kinda scared me.

Are they like the people on that gator hunting show on the history channel? "Shoot da gatah! Shoot im!":)

[Helvis2012]

Well, at least that hassle is over.

[Yvonne183]

Are they like the people on that gator hunting show on the history channel? "Shoot da gatah! Shoot im!":)


I never saw that show but if I wasn't blood they would probably have shot me. lol But they weren't all that bad,, just that they treated me like an exhibit at the zoo. They poked me with a stick a lot to see if I was real.

Hi I Need A

[robertlouis]

Yes the gold coast with my ex?

Just joking, mate. Mind you, my comment goes back to breaking down in a dusty one street town in Queensland where everyone I met looked like an extra from Deliverance and the gene pool had clearly run dry several generations before!

[robertlouis]

I never saw that show but if I wasn't blood they would probably have shot me. lol But they weren't all that bad,, just that they treated me like an exhibit at the zoo. They poked me with a stick a lot to see if I was real.

Hi I Need A

I think most people would do that the first time they meet you, Yvonne. :dancing:

[theone1982]

A lot of my relatives are the worst kind of hillbillies, hillbillies who think they are more sophisticated than everyone else, completely ambivalent to their hillbillie-ism.

[addicted]

dino do they know you come on this site looking at t girls with 9 inch monster cocks?

[Jericho]

Still, fun at a barbecue! :shrug

[maaarc]

I never saw that show but if I wasn't blood they would probably have shot me. lol But they weren't all that bad,, just that they treated me like an exhibit at the zoo. They poked me with a stick a lot to see if I was real.

Hi I Need A

Hi Yvonne - I love you :) I still think the billhillies from WV are the best or worst :)

check this out
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kolMzar_3x0

Full movie

http://www.screen4u.net/video/1fd29efee284f47e009f25c9023eca13

[robertlouis]

Still, fun at a barbecue! :shrug


......says a sheepshagger from Wales. :dancing:

[Dino Velvet]

These folks are pretty much the way you guys described them but still worse. Did I mention they were still Birthers? They weren't sure Hawaii was a state when Obama was born although they have no idea, even approximately, the year Obama was born.

You guys can unload on them and make any racial jokes about them that you want. I don't care.

These folks make the mad Cossacks on my father's side seem almost human. My gene pool is totally fucked. I promise not to breed.

Here's a picture of one of them running into a neighbor.

[Dino Velvet]

Texas Hillbiilies,, West Virginia hillbillies,,,ha ha ha,, they ain't nothing compared to my Cajun relatives from the swamps of Louisiana. I just visited them last year for the first time and i gotta say,, they kinda scared me.

Can you understand anything your relative's say? My uncle looks just like Henry Lee Lucas. He has that nasally West Texas accent and he whistles when he talks. When he gets excited about something it might as well be Mandarin as far as my ears are concerned. I just have a painful smile on my face and nod my head.

http://cache3.asset-cache.net/xc/73553618.jpg?v=1&c=IWSAsset&k=2&d=77BFBA49EF8789215ABF3343C02EA5486FD702CB28924FDC BF945546AF55DCE559C3BA10E3ED11CB

[Jericho]

......says a sheepshagger from Wales. :dancing:


Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahsterd! :hide-1:

[robertlouis]

Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahsterd! :hide-1:

So ewe're not denying it, then? :dancing:

[Dino Velvet]

So ewe're not denying it, then? :dancing:

Uhhhhh... what country humor is that????
Didn't want to start assuming where you guys are from again.

I like it and want to learn. Who fucks sheep the best? Any Goat Fuckers?

[Christastic]

If it's a relative I don't like, I just don't answer the door. Or the phone. Life is too damn short.

[robertlouis]

Uhhhhh... what country humor is that????
Didn't want to start assuming where you guys are from again.

I like it and want to learn. Who fucks sheep the best? Any Goat Fuckers?

Jericho is from Wrexham in Wales. Wales is the sheepshagging centre of the UK. All they do is sing, dig for coal, cough, moan like hell and fuck merino lambs.

And in answer to your questions:

1. New Zealanders, when they can't get hold of Hobbits

2. Greeks. It's their national sport apart from baiting Turks.

[Jericho]

Any Goat Fuckers?

You need to go north of Newcastle and across the border to find them.

[Jericho]

So ewe're not denying it, then? :dancing:

Only the pretty ones, though...Do have standards! :shrug

[robertlouis]

Only the pretty ones, though...Do have standards! :shrug

Yes, but always remember to put their back legs in wellies, so that they push back harder.......

[Dino Velvet]

If it's a relative I don't like, I just don't answer the door. Or the phone. Life is too damn short.

I need to get Caller ID on my land line. I have an Aunt from Palos Verdes who is a sneaky politician and former mayor of a South Bay town. She's tricky and never gets stuck with them. I need her to teach me the art of avoiding people. She's as smart as the Texans are dumb.

http://cinematichorrorarchive.files.wordpress.com/2011/01/the-texas-chainsaw-massacre-1974-00-630-75.jpg

[robertlouis]

I need to get Caller ID on my land line. I have an Aunt from Palos Verdes who is a sneaky politician and former mayor of a South Bay town. She's tricky and never gets stuck with them. I need her to teach me the art of avoiding people. She's as smart as the Texans are dumb.

http://cinematichorrorarchive.files.wordpress.com/2011/01/the-texas-chainsaw-massacre-1974-00-630-75.jpg

Is this her, Dino? Put her photo on your mantelpiece and any guest will leave within five minutes. Guaranteed or your money back.

[Jericho]

Yes, but always remember to put their back legs in wellies, so that they push back harder.......

Ahhh, the internet...it's all about sharing! :ignore:

[robertlouis]

Ahhh, the internet...it's all about sharing! :ignore:


Yes, and just think, you can print off this pic and put it beside your bed.

Ewe baaaaaad boy.

[Dino Velvet]

Is this her, Dino? Put her photo on your mantelpiece and any guest will leave within five minutes. Guaranteed or your money back.

That looks more like the aunt that barged into my house not the smooth criminal politician. She looks like one of those people in a family photo from about 150 years ago, where everybody back then tried to pose like they were proud but "didn't approve of nobody". She could possibly be a matriarch to an old Ku Klux Klan family.

I was even shocked at how politically incorrect they were. Now I see how some here view me.

[Jericho]

Uhhhhh... what country humor is that????
Didn't want to start assuming where you guys are from again.


To clear things up, here's some jockish hillbillies for you.

[theone1982]

Yes, and just think, you can print off this pic and put it beside your bed.

Ewe baaaaaad boy.

Crotchless underwear?! What a whore!:)

[robertlouis]

To clear things up, here's some jockish hillbillies for you.

Yep, the one on the left's an American and the one on the right's a feckin' mick.

What's your point?

[Jericho]

Yep, the one on the left's an American and the one on the right's a feckin' mick.

What's your point?

Picky, picky, picky.
Did you hear me complaining when the sheep you posted was obviously New Zealandish (you can tell by the ears)... s'fact! :whistle:

[Yvonne183]

Can you understand anything your relative's say? My uncle looks just like Henry Lee Lucas. He has that nasally West Texas accent and he whistles when he talks. When he gets excited about something it might as well be Mandarin as far as my ears are concerned. I just have a painful smile on my face and nod my head.

http://cache3.asset-cache.net/xc/73553618.jpg?v=1&c=IWSAsset&k=2&d=77BFBA49EF8789215ABF3343C02EA5486FD702CB28924FDC BF945546AF55DCE559C3BA10E3ED11CB


Hell no, I don't understand very much what they say and to top it off, some of them speak some sort of French language. I try and use hand signs, usually I just use my middle finger, seems they understand that.

[Dino Velvet]

Hell no, I don't understand very much what they say and to top it off, some of them speak some sort of French language. I try and use hand signs, usually I just use my middle finger, seems they understand that.

I'll trade mine for yours. Are yours Birthers too? My house still has the odor of Slack-Jawed Yokels.