What fucking good is life?

[BellaBellucci]

... when incredible people get emotionally exploited and pushed past their limits to the point that they decide to end it all and the assholes that perpetrate the bullshit will probably live forever. Fuck man. FUCK!

FUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://www.seoconsultants.com/just-say-no/images/no-justice-480.gif

~BB~

[You Love Us]

It's the way of the world. It seems that people who are willing to be C**ts get ahead while honest, decent people are exploited. I don't want to sound like an after school special but I say don't let it get you down... atleast not too much. When I feel pissed off, like everything is wrong with the world and that, to quote Mr Idle, "life's a piece of shit". I try to remember that at some point I will smile or laugh and that no matter how bad I feel, there is always something or someone out there that'll make me feel better. It doesn't fix the problems but it makes me believe that I can.

[MrsKellyPierce]

It always happens to the weakest of souls and softest of hearts..the ones wanting to be loved and try to love others..

[iamdrgonzo]

Worry not Bella, Karma is a son of a bitch.

"Ashes and diamonds, foe and friend, we were all equal in the end" The Final Cut

[Yvonne183]

As I said in the Bridget thread,, I have had people I know commit suicide. I have even tried to off myself but i failed as is obvious. But I have the scars and i still cut from time to time cause to me it re-leaves some of the pain. Don't ask me how, it just does. but for the most part when things get rough I just hide away. I just stay in a room for days on end till I feel I can leave again, this helps and it's better than suicide.


But still,, for me,, I still feel that suicide is an option. While yes it is sad and I admit that, but I do believe for me it is a choice. I have no one,, very few friends to miss me,, no family, they rejected me years ago, there will be no one left behind to cry or care so the reason that suicide will hurt others is not there for me. I am not suicidal, I am of very sound mind, I just feel that when the day comes that I should have the option of leaving the world on my terms.

I am very saddened when someone else kills themselves, this hurts me, but for myself I feel differently and i should be able end things on my terms and not from some nut job with a knife or gun.

While i say that I don't care what people think of me,, still, it does hurt when people call me nasty names, throw things like bottles at me, being used by assholes,, getting beat up,,and some other bad shit that I can't talk about, I get scared every night walking home,, there is always someone following me or it's got to the point where I think there are people hiding in the shadows. I get very nervous sometimes just thinking about the next night I go out. So to make myself feel better, I stay home for long periods of time till i am able to go out again,, these words from Simon and Garfunkel tell it all.


I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.


PS- Again, I am not suicidal, I may never kill myself,, but I just feel that for me that it is an option for when things get to much. As the title says, "What Fucking Good Is Life"? Maybe a good answer to that question is needed.

[MrF]

Some advice to consider :

1. Much of life is what YOU make it. Could the perception of "no justice" be partly your outlook ?

2. Granted, you may be dealt a bad hand sometimes. Just fold and wait for another round, if possible. Be willing to gamble when it's worth it.

3. Avoid assholes. Stay loyal to friends who pass the test of time.

There you go. All problems solved ! Normally I charge a consulting fee, but I've given you this advice for free. And you get what you pay for. :)

[BellaBellucci]

PS- Again, I am not suicidal, I may never kill myself,, but I just feel that for me that it is an option for when things get to much. As the title says, "What Fucking Good Is Life"? Maybe a good answer to that question is needed.

I can relate to your sentiment in a lot of ways, and while I don't condone suicide, I do believe in the right of a person to make that choice. However, the topic of this thread wasn't intended to encourage a discussion on that topic, but simply to point out that life isn't fair. It wasn't intended to be taken so literally and out of context like that. Please don't misunderstand.

~BB~

[onmyknees]

... when incredible people get emotionally exploited and pushed past their limits to the point that they decide to end it all and the assholes that perpetrate the bullshit will probably live forever. Fuck man. FUCK!

FUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://www.seoconsultants.com/just-say-no/images/no-justice-480.gif

~BB~

Bella..not sure what this is all about, but it doesn't sound like you baby. I do know this...I've seen people who weren't ready to cash out but were faced with that finality and not by thier own doing....and would have traded all earthy possessions for just one more day to enjoy the little things that life has to offer. A kiss, a warm sexy smile, a good laugh...Many never got that chance. I realize for someone who is in despair, it's hard to rationalize all that. I hope everythings gonna be allright baby.

[rockabilly]

My gf broke up w/ me and each day is a struggle to not hurt myself.

Those that know me know all the details and i'm not gonna go any further than what i stated previously.

My heart is broken and i lost my future ... so that's all from me.

[BellaBellucci]

My gf broke up w/ me and each day is a struggle to not hurt myself.

Those that know me know all the details and i'm not gonna go any further than what i stated previously.

My heart is broken and i lost my future ... so that's all from me.

I hope you're kidding. Have you learned nothing from all of this?

~BB~

[maaarc]

I am sorry for your loss my young friend. Justice and fairness are human created concepts, as such they have little relationship to objective reality in this material world. Death is simply the opening and closing of a door. Your friend will always be with you, even if you do not feel their touch or hear their voice they are always with you - real love/friendship is a bond that cannot be broken even by death.

[maaarc]

My gf broke up w/ me and each day is a struggle to not hurt myself.

Those that know me know all the details and i'm not gonna go any further than what i stated previously.

My heart is broken and i lost my future ... so that's all from me.

Your heart and future are lost and broken ONLY if YOU decide it will be so. Happiness is yours if you decide to take it. Do you remember the person you were before you met this ex GF? were you ever happy? were you ever strong? be that person again - no one can stop you but you. forgive this person for breaking your heart, forgive yourself for whatever you may need to be forgiven for and happiness will return to you - be well rockabilly

[166]

Well put, ~BB~. My hope is that everyone can take something away from this.

I think the words of our mate Paulo Coelho are pretty appropriate too;

"Life is too short - or too long - to allow myself the luxury of living it badly."

[dderek123]

Uhh, so what happened?

[Birgitta]

My gf broke up w/ me and each day is a struggle to not hurt myself.

Those that know me know all the details and i'm not gonna go any further than what i stated previously.

My heart is broken and i lost my future ... so that's all from me.

There is no sickness then sickness of the heart!!!
I believe Rumi said that!

Please try to be courageous and believe there will be love for you again!!!

[BigDF]

My gf broke up w/ me and each day is a struggle to not hurt myself.

Those that know me know all the details and i'm not gonna go any further than what i stated previously.

My heart is broken and i lost my future ... so that's all from me.Rockabilly, I know you are hurting right now and I know exactly how you feel, man, but I am here to tell you that an even brighter future is heading your way and you have to be here to enjoy it. Please, please, hang in there and don't do anything to yourself. I know you are a good person and don't deserve the pain you are in right now, but please trust me things will work out for you, if you can be patient and work yourself through the dark times.

[Willie Escalade]

A friend of mine suggested that I ask myself these questions. Was I happy before this incident (or person) in question? What made me happy? If I were to go back to what made me happy in the first place, would I return to my former self?

On another note, blaming people on a website for one's decisions is straight up bullshit. When it comes to suicide and it's your own hand then there is no one but yourself to blame. There are other ways to deal with problems.

Sorry to put it like that, especially in light with what's happened, but it's been on my mind for awhile now...

[Birgitta]

As I said in the Bridget thread,, I have had people I know commit suicide. I have even tried to off myself but i failed as is obvious. But I have the scars and i still cut from time to time cause to me it re-leaves some of the pain. Don't ask me how, it just does. but for the most part when things get rough I just hide away. I just stay in a room for days on end till I feel I can leave again, this helps and it's better than suicide.


But still,, for me,, I still feel that suicide is an option. While yes it is sad and I admit that, but I do believe for me it is a choice. I have no one,, very few friends to miss me,, no family, they rejected me years ago, there will be no one left behind to cry or care so the reason that suicide will hurt others is not there for me. I am not suicidal, I am of very sound mind, I just feel that when the day comes that I should have the option of leaving the world on my terms.

I am very saddened when someone else kills themselves, this hurts me, but for myself I feel differently and i should be able end things on my terms and not from some nut job with a knife or gun.

While i say that I don't care what people think of me,, still, it does hurt when people call me nasty names, throw things like bottles at me, being used by assholes,, getting beat up,,and some other bad shit that I can't talk about, I get scared every night walking home,, there is always someone following me or it's got to the point where I think there are people hiding in the shadows. I get very nervous sometimes just thinking about the next night I go out. So to make myself feel better, I stay home for long periods of time till i am able to go out again,, these words from Simon and Garfunkel tell it all.


I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.


PS- Again, I am not suicidal, I may never kill myself,, but I just feel that for me that it is an option for when things get to much. As the title says, "What Fucking Good Is Life"? Maybe a good answer to that question is needed.


Hi Yvonne!

To be honest... it does not suprise me that us girls contemplate suicide. I have known a few that did and I do myself,... there is no reason to be alarmed though because I have been having these thoughts since early puberty and I am 32 now.

I have lived with the wish to end my life for a very long time, and I have to negotiate with that part of myself sometimes on a daily basis to keep me going.

Dont get me wrong I can be happy at times and I can appreciate life so much, so much sometimes that I can say it all was well worth the pain that I have been feeling, but these are moments, and fortunately they are there once in a while and the reason that I keep going on.

That and perhaps some belief that death perhaps will not resolve any of the issues I might be having.

To be in the "community" is not always a healthy place, especially on forums like this, where everything seems to be centered around looks, feminity, sex and not so much about love and self worth.

Maybe we should try and be open about suicidal thoughts here because from my experience talking about it can help, I became a lot more at ease with myself when I accepted that I really did not want to live my life as it is and has become,

I tell myself that I have agreed upon wanting to end my life, but to just wait a bit and see what happens and what I can learn still, ..
and I am glad I am still around allthough each day is a new challange.

love
Birgitta

[Jericho]

Don't know what good it is, but, imo, it beats the shite out of the alternative! :shrug

But if anyone is planning on shuffling off this mortal coil, make sure you have a will written up.
Leave me your television...And porn collection!

[insurgentes]

Sure we live in the BEST POSSIBLE WORLD !

Just think how the world would be if:

the sky instead of being wonderful blue would be the colour of shit !

air would always have the smell of sulphur and rotten eggs !

we could see only in black and white !

we didn't have legs !

when we cut, the blood would not coagulate !

Enjoy life ! We live in thye best possible world. And ...

THE WORLD OUTSIDE IN NOTHING LESS THAN THE PROJECTION OF YOUR INNER WORLD.

[oralboy707]

in light of such tragedy .. i say go out and tell your friends you love them .. remind the people who care about you just how much you care about them .. don't take it for granted, be an openly & outrageously good friend .. life is short ..

[joeninety]

However, the topic of this thread wasn't intended to encourage a discussion on that topic, but simply to point out that life isn't fair. It wasn't intended to be taken so literally and out of context like that. Please don't misunderstand.

~BB~

??? without trying to sound unsympathetic what do you mean life isn't fair, it is what it is nothing more and nothing less, but with a little effort life can then become what you want it to be, its tragic about this girls passing but if she felt she had to do this then life must simply of been unbearable for her, and solace should be sought in the fact that she is now at peace and free of her torment

[trish]

The value of life, like everything else, is determined by market forces.

[Helvis2012]

There's got to be another way.

[Birgitta]

THE WORLD OUTSIDE IN NOTHING LESS THAN THE PROJECTION OF YOUR INNER WORLD.

The inner world is shaped by interaction with the outer world, your envirement, its not easy to change your perspective and projection, without being enlightened lol

[rover37]

Life has its ups and downs, and the down times are only temporary, even though it may not seem that way. Often, the hard times in our lives, when things seem hopeless, are really opportunities to learn valuable lessons such as humility, dependence on God, the value of prayer, or to learn how to help others who are suffering. In times when things seem the worst, we can be sure that God loves us more than ever.

[robertlouis]

Sure we live in the BEST POSSIBLE WORLD !

Just think how the world would be if:

the sky instead of being wonderful blue would be the colour of shit !

air would always have the smell of sulphur and rotten eggs !

we could see only in black and white !




.... in which case, we would be in industrial Poland.

[russtafa]

these people need lots of security around them because they live in fear of another French revolution because of all of the people they have abused

[traLika]

We all have "Life's not fair", "Why me?" and "What have I done to deserve this shit?" moments but, please... no more suicides!

As a couple of other people here have already said; life's what you make it. A negative situation can always be turned around into a positive one, even if it doesn't seem that way when you're feeling down...

[youshouldtrythislol]

I like to look at it this way: If life was not bad at times, one would not appreciate the good times nearly as much.

as far as 'what fucking good is life?', everyone has to find their own answer to that question, as I think the answer differs person to person. For me, the good in life is the times spent with friends and loved ones.

[BellaBellucci]

I like to look at it this way: If life was not bad at times, one would not appreciate the good times nearly as much.

as far as 'what fucking good is life?', everyone has to find their own answer to that question, as I think the answer differs person to person. For me, the good in life is the times spent with friends and loved ones.

Well said. :iagree:

~BB~

[yodajazz]

... when incredible people get emotionally exploited and pushed past their limits to the point that they decide to end it all and the assholes that perpetrate the bullshit will probably live forever. Fuck man. FUCK!

FUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



~BB~
It may seem like some people get away with things, but the vast majority of the time, I believe they dont. Their actions generate reactions that come back to them. Especially it they repeat the same behaviors. Some call it karma. Not everyone understand how it works.


My gf broke up w/ me and each day is a struggle to not hurt myself.

Those that know me know all the details and i'm not gonna go any further than what i stated previously.

My heart is broken and i lost my future ... so that's all from me.

Unless you have told no about your break-up, and have no friends or relatives, someone is probably conspiring at this very moment to hook you up with one of their friends. People love to be match makers. You dont even have to go out and look, it you dont feel like it. In fact, I bet that they wanted to hook you up before, but you were in a relationship already. People love to cheer someone up, who has just broken up. It makes them feel good about themselves. My only suggestion is that when you meet someone new, dont spend too much time talking about your ex; be positive about what you want to experience, rather than the past.

[insurgentes]

The inner world is shaped by interaction with the outer world, your envirement, its not easy to change your perspective and projection, without being enlightened lol

It's not easy, but it is definitely the only thing you can realistically do.

It's very difficult to change the behaviour of others and how the world outside works, but you can definitely CHANGE THE WAY YOU REACT to things that happen.

The difference between losers and winners is that losers keep seeing problems, whereas winners see opportunities.

Losers keep on complaining and acting the same way, whereas winners change their behaviour, adapting to external curcumstances.

An example of how your inner world determines the outer world ? BREATHING.

Take control of your BREATHING, and you will take control of the world and your destiny.

If you breathe in a shallow and nervous way, you can be in the best place in the world (in a sunny beach at Hawaii ?), but you will feel insecure, unhappy and you will se "problems" out there.

If you breathe in a proper way, all problems will instantly disappear and you will feel and be in control.

TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR BREATH AND YOU WILL TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE. GUARANTEED.

[scroller]

... someone is probably conspiring at this very moment to hook you up with one of their friends. People love to be match makers. You dont even have to go out and look, it you dont feel like it. In fact, I bet that they wanted to hook you up before, but you were in a relationship already. People love to cheer someone up, who has just broken up.

This sounds like pure fairy tale. I have never witnessed anyone doing this for anyone, ever.

[kaiser1one]

Suicide is the cowards way out.

[runningdownthatdream]

Suicide is the cowards way out.

Maybe - maybe not. That's an oft-repeated mantra that as the years go by just become some words without any true meaning. The statement presumes that continuing to battle yourself is somehow noble and that life is better than death. We don't know that 'being alive' is better - our judgement is necessarily one-sided.

Sometimes I think the people who choose to end life as we know it are braver than we give them credit for. Rather than continuing to fight a losing battle (we're only going to die so why make the journey more difficult than we have to?) they made a decision (disregarded the status quo) and chose the unknown instead. Choosing to go down a path that few willingly choose isn't an act of weakness.

I think though that we - the living - not understanding their actions can either only feel sorry for what WE lost or be angry at them for doing what we perhaps didn't have the courage to do. Whenever I hear of a suicide, I first think of the positive (the person tried to take control of themselves and do something that they thought would be better for them) and then I am sad for what the rest of us have lost and afterwards I'm angry that those of us left behind couldn't infuse some of our happiness into them while they were with us.

[scroller]

Suicide is the cowards way out.

Bullshit.

[LittleGuy]

Bullshit.

Why is it bullshit?

[fred41]

"suicide is cowardly" is one of those oft repeated statements that, like most other blanket statements...isn't really true.
Most of the time, when we hear that a person takes their own life...we rarely know that person or the complete reason for the action. It's a personal act ...so it's often ridiculous to judge the act ...especially when one doesn't really know the individual in question.

What I do find ironic however is that most of the people I've known or have come in contact with, that decided to end their life...were infinitely more interesting personalities whose value on this planet would've been far greater than some of the vile, ignorant, petty and useless creatures who would claw and scratch to protect their own pathetic skins from even the slightest harm.

...and that's a real shame.

[BigDF]

"suicide is cowardly" is one of those oft repeated statements that, like most other blanket statements...isn't really true.
Most of the time, when we hear that a person takes their own life...we rarely know that person or the complete reason for the action. It's a personal act ...so it's often ridiculous to judge the act ...especially when one doesn't really know the individual in question.

What I do find ironic however is that most of the people I've known or have come in contact with, that decided to end their life...were infinitely more interesting personalities whose value on this planet would've been far greater than some of the vile, ignorant, petty and useless creatures who would claw and scratch to protect their own pathetic skins from even the slightest harm.

...and that's a real shame.Well said. Kurt Vonnegut once said he was committing suicide by cigarette and sometimes I feel the same way myself, as I sit here puffing away.

I have no idea why Bridget decided to end her life, but I do know she was not a coward. I think it's impossible to for a transsexual to be a coward because it takes quite a bit of bravery to go through the transition process. I am still saddened by our loss of her and I pray that she is in a good place and at peace with herself.

[kaiser1one]

Suicide by cigarette? Right...... I'm sorry, suicide to me is immediate not some years long process like smoking. (And since I know someone will easily take that out of context, yes I know some people can take years to come to that idea. However, choosing to smoke and KNOWING that it's going to cause your death and not giving 2 squirrel farts about it is completely different.)

Who said you have to battle yourself, accept the hand your dealt and move on. Moving on may indeed be difficult but keep at it and results will happen.

Someone kills themself because they can't take it anymore? Life is too rough or dicked them over in some way? Tell life to fuck itself and live on. Why end your life when you've only got one. Nothing good comes from it and it's an extremely selfish act to boot.

It's a stupid thing to do. If you can't tough out life's MANY troubles, and you choose killing yourself as an "only way out", your a coward plain and simple. Living is tougher than killing yourself.

Why the hell would you rather be dead than alive? So you can hope that you go to "heaven" or a more "peaceful place"? Fuck that. Live your life, then when you die finally, if there is anything after that, you can enjoy it.

[joeninety]

Suicide by cigarette? Right...... I'm sorry, suicide to me is immediate not some years long process like smoking. (And since I know someone will easily take that out of context, yes I know some people can take years to come to that idea. However, choosing to smoke and KNOWING that it's going to cause your death and not giving 2 squirrel farts about it is completely different.)

Who said you have to battle yourself, accept the hand your dealt and move on. Moving on may indeed be difficult but keep at it and results will happen.

Someone kills themself because they can't take it anymore? Life is too rough or dicked them over in some way? Tell life to fuck itself and live on. Why end your life when you've only got one. Nothing good comes from it and it's an extremely selfish act to boot.

It's a stupid thing to do. If you can't tough out life's MANY troubles, and you choose killing yourself as an "only way out", your a coward plain and simple. Living is tougher than killing yourself.

Why the hell would you rather be dead than alive? So you can hope that you go to "heaven" or a more "peaceful place"? Fuck that. Live your life, then when you die finally, if there is anything after that, you can enjoy it.

This is a rich post and kind of lacking in empathy at the end of the day did you know what was going on inside that girls head, maybe inside it was a kind of hell you could never comprehend, its all well and good you sitting up there throwing your judgements down but until you have walked a mile in the persons shoes you cannot be qualified to judge.

Are you ts probably not do you live on the fringes of society again with that type of attitude probably not, so in your world being a normal accepted member of society everything is already going be less of a struggle, until you have had to endure such struggle on top of any mental issues this girl may of had i wouldn't be so quick to lord it about on your high horse.

I wouldn't say its cowardice to kill yourself in fact being as human nature is all about survival and whatever else on top you would have to be pretty brave or ill to want to do what is in essence against your true encoded nature, some people are just to nice and not tough enough to endure the sometimes harshness of this life.

I can imagine that being ts that harshness is endured everyday and like i say if you have to carry that kind burden through no fault of your own and be looked down upon by gen pop i imagine that that type of existence is going to be hard, couple that type of reality and possible mental issues with someone of a sweet nature then having to live that life, then it is kind of obvious to see why they might not want to live it and would rather choose death but you my friend you could never understand this as you have never lived it and you clearly lack empathy to fathom such a reality.

[Birgitta]

Maybe - maybe not. That's an oft-repeated mantra that as the years go by just become some words without any true meaning. The statement presumes that continuing to battle yourself is somehow noble and that life is better than death. We don't know that 'being alive' is better - our judgement is necessarily one-sided.

Sometimes I think the people who choose to end life as we know it are braver than we give them credit for. Rather than continuing to fight a losing battle (we're only going to die so why make the journey more difficult than we have to?) they made a decision (disregarded the status quo) and chose the unknown instead. Choosing to go down a path that few willingly choose isn't an act of weakness.

I think though that we - the living - not understanding their actions can either only feel sorry for what WE lost or be angry at them for doing what we perhaps didn't have the courage to do. Whenever I hear of a suicide, I first think of the positive (the person tried to take control of themselves and do something that they thought would be better for them) and then I am sad for what the rest of us have lost and afterwards I'm angry that those of us left behind couldn't infuse some of our happiness into them while they were with us.


:wiggle::wiggle::iagree:

[Birgitta]

"suicide is cowardly" is one of those oft repeated statements that, like most other blanket statements...isn't really true.
Most of the time, when we hear that a person takes their own life...we rarely know that person or the complete reason for the action. It's a personal act ...so it's often ridiculous to judge the act ...especially when one doesn't really know the individual in question.

What I do find ironic however is that most of the people I've known or have come in contact with, that decided to end their life...were infinitely more interesting personalities whose value on this planet would've been far greater than some of the vile, ignorant, petty and useless creatures who would claw and scratch to protect their own pathetic skins from even the slightest harm.

...and that's a real shame.

u guys make me happy ! :)
:party:

[runningdownthatdream]

Suicide by cigarette? Right...... I'm sorry, suicide to me is immediate not some years long process like smoking. (And since I know someone will easily take that out of context, yes I know some people can take years to come to that idea. However, choosing to smoke and KNOWING that it's going to cause your death and not giving 2 squirrel farts about it is completely different.)

Who said you have to battle yourself, accept the hand your dealt and move on. Moving on may indeed be difficult but keep at it and results will happen.

Someone kills themself because they can't take it anymore? Life is too rough or dicked them over in some way? Tell life to fuck itself and live on. Why end your life when you've only got one. Nothing good comes from it and it's an extremely selfish act to boot.

It's a stupid thing to do. If you can't tough out life's MANY troubles, and you choose killing yourself as an "only way out", your a coward plain and simple. Living is tougher than killing yourself.

Why the hell would you rather be dead than alive? So you can hope that you go to "heaven" or a more "peaceful place"? Fuck that. Live your life, then when you die finally, if there is anything after that, you can enjoy it.

Clearly you thought about suicide sometime in your past, didn't do it, and maybe you decided you're happier now. Then again if you were happy, I don't think you'd be as bitter as you sound?

Not criticism towards you, but likewise try not to be harshly judgemental against someone that chose a path other than one you think is noble. That Nietzsche-like attitude was, well......what Nietzsche espoused but when you look at his life, it was pretty pathetic and spent in his later years bitter, pining after a woman that didn't care about him until going mad, and dying alone and raving. He just talked a tough game but ultimately he died weak and alone as we all will.....what does it matter if it's by your own hand or that of nature?

[Yvonne183]

I'm sorry Bella if I misunderstood your original thought on this thread, sometimes I don't understand things all that good.

But I gotta make a response to what has been said since i made my post.

I am not a coward,, well i am a coward in some ways but for the most part I think I'm not
the upper end of the coward scale. I know that life is what one makes it and many people
get rough spots in their life and they should move on, I understand this. But i had bad shit
happen to me in my past, when I was young and for the most part I got through it,, OK I did make an attempt
on my life cause there was extreme pain, but i am still here. The reason that I say that I
have the choice to end it on my terms is cause of the things that happened to me. I am tired of the nightmares.
Yes, i got through the rough patches but the nightmares remain in my head and won't go away.
I do understand that there are people who suffer much worse than I, like people in Dafur for example.
But I am not inside of their heads, i only know what is inside my head. I only know of my nightmares
and the fear. I don't want the nightmares and I am tired of lving in fear, so i feel that one day when the
pain gets to be too much, which I feel will one day happen, then I should have the choice of ending my life.
I am hurting no one cause i have no friends or family. People I met online would never even know what
happened to me. There would just be no more posts on forums from me. I do hope there is a better place
we go to when we die but I don't care about that, I am not looking for a better place, i just want the
nightmares and pain to end.

Again, I am not a coward, I grew up in the Bronx, had many fights and battles with people that wanted to harm me,,
lost most of the fights but still I tried. It's just that there will come a time when I say that I have had enough and will choose to kill myself. I hurt no one but myself.

Again,, Bella I'm sorry if my post was wrong but I had to make it, sorry.

[Birgitta]

This is a rich post and kind of lacking in empathy at the end of the day did you know what was going on inside that girls head, maybe inside it was a kind of hell you could never comprehend, its all well and good you sitting up there throwing your judgements down but until you have walked a mile in the persons shoes you cannot be qualified to judge.

Are you ts probably not do you live on the fringes of society again with that type of attitude probably not, so in your world being a normal accepted member of society everything is already going be less of a struggle, until you have had to endure such struggle on top of any mental issues this girl may of had i wouldn't be so quick to lord it about on your high horse.

I wouldn't say its cowardice to kill yourself in fact being as human nature is all about survival and whatever else on top you would have to be pretty brave or ill to want to do what is in essence against your true encoded nature, some people are just to nice and not tough enough to endure the sometimes harshness of this life.

I can imagine that being ts that harshness is endured everyday and like i say if you have to carry that kind burden through no fault of your own and be looked down upon by gen pop i imagine that that type of existence is going to be hard, couple that type of reality and possible mental issues with someone of a sweet nature then having to live that life, then it is kind of obvious to see why they might not want to live it and would rather choose death but you my friend you could never understand this as you have never lived it and you clearly lack empathy to fathom such a reality.

Im glad you guys are understanding and intelligent.

And btw I think the reasons for wanting to end life are just too personal, sometimes people cannot even think of a reason why, they have had a normal life, money jobs children, but they simply want to end it.
Figure that out.

I know from my own experience having genderdysforia can be (and feel) like hell, and it does not suprise me others end it. I find it understandable. I keep going on because I have done so in my life so far and lately have not been driven to the edge just yet, but I could easely fall. Life is so fragile.

Today I want to live it, and am thankfull for it.
But tommorow is unsure. And I know it!

Love
Birgit

[joeninety]

Yeah Birgit life is fragile and always teetering on a knife edge most people just don't really realise how much so,

To those that have to endure the struggle lets hope for them that there is some respite, and here is to a better tomorrow.

[youshouldtrythislol]

Again, I am not a coward, I grew up in the Bronx, had many fights and battles with people that wanted to harm me,,
lost most of the fights but still I tried. It's just that there will come a time when I say that I have had enough and will choose to kill myself. I hurt no one but myself.

Again,, Bella I'm sorry if my post was wrong but I had to make it, sorry.
I disagree. you dont just hurt yourself, you hurt those who care about you.

[BellaBellucci]

I disagree. you dont just hurt yourself, you hurt those who care about you.

I hate to have to argue this for obvious reasons, but what if a person doesn't have anyone who cares about them? What if that's precisely the reason a person doesn't want to go on in the first place?

... and don't say everyone has people who care about them. That's a cop-out, not to mention the reality that, in the case of most transsexual women, either the love in their life is superficial or it's based on our unique anatomy for the most part. There are definitely people out there who truly have nobody.

Like I said before, I don't think everyone should go out and end themselves, however, I can completely understand why someone might want to and really have to support their right to do with their body what they wish. But just because you can do something, it doesn't mean that you should.

~BB~

[onmyknees]

Im glad you guys are understanding and intelligent.

And btw I think the reasons for wanting to end life are just too personal, sometimes people cannot even think of a reason why, they have had a normal life, money jobs children, but they simply want to end it.
Figure that out.

I know from my own experience having genderdysforia can be (and feel) like hell, and it does not suprise me others end it. I find it understandable. I keep going on because I have done so in my life so far and lately have not been driven to the edge just yet, but I could easely fall. Life is so fragile.

Today I want to live it, and am thankfull for it.
But tommorow is unsure. And I know it!

Love
Birgit

I find your words deeply moving and somewhat alarming Brigit. I look at your little avatar picture and make assumptions I probably have no bussiness making not knowing you personally. I think...my gawd...what a beautiful lady, stunning in fact, and what a pleasure to be able to share her company should circumstances find us face to face. But I guess behind all of our pictures are the unseen anxieties. Jackson Browne's lyrics to "The Photograph" seem fitting ...

"You've known that hollow feeling of your own steps in flight
You've had to hide sometimes but now you're allright
And it's good to see your smiling face tonight"

I think you're a beautiful lady and the world needs more beautiful ladies !
xoxo

[Stavros]

A clinincal psychologist I used to know said people committed suicide when they felt they had run out of options -obviously some people do it to end pain if they are suffereing, for example from cancer; some people in a war situation have killed themselves rather than be taken by 'the enemy'; and some -Japanese Kamikaze, Tamil Tigers, Jihadi's, do it for the 'glory'.

Usually there is a life option in even the darkest moment, but if someone's depression has sunk so low, the bare minimum may not be enough.

[youshouldtrythislol]

I hate to have to argue this for obvious reasons, but what if a person doesn't have anyone who cares about them? What if that's precisely the reason a person doesn't want to go on in the first place?

... and don't say everyone has people who care about them. That's a cop-out, not to mention the reality that, in the case of most transsexual women, either the love in their life is superficial or it's based on our unique anatomy for the most part. There are definitely people out there who truly have nobody.

Like I said before, I don't think everyone should go out and end themselves, however, I can completely understand why someone might want to and really have to support their right to do with their body what they wish. But just because you can do something, it doesn't mean that you should.

~BB~
I think everyone has at least one person who cares about them. Not because it is a cop out answer, but because you cant be alive more than 2 minuites without coming into contact with someone. I think it is impossible to live at all and not touch someones life and have at least one person who cares about you.

[BellaBellucci]

I think everyone has at least one person who cares about them. Not because it is a cop out answer, but because you cant be alive more than 2 minuites without coming into contact with someone. I think it is impossible to live at all and not touch someones life and have at least one person who cares about you.

Sure, but care to what point? I'm not going to continue living a miserable existence for the 7-11 lady or the manager of my hotel because they 'care' so much about me. That's why it's a cop-out answer.

There are truly people out there who have NO intimate or close relationships to anyone.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

I am not talking about the 7-11 lady or anything like that. I believe it is impossible to live life and not have someone who cares about you. Some may not say they care, but they do.

I dont think it is possible to live and not have someone who cares about them. The only way I think that can happen is if someone is a shut in and never ever ever leaves the house.

[runningdownthatdream]

Sure, but care to what point? I'm not going to continue living a miserable existence for the 7-11 lady or the manager of my hotel because they 'care' so much about me. That's why it's a cop-out answer.

There are truly people out there who have NO intimate relationships.

~BB~

....and shouldn't we be living for ourselves anyways? Isn't an individual's happiness tied to how they see themselves, what they enjoy, who they enjoy, and why they enjoy? It doesn't matter if a million people are madly in love with someone, if they can't find their own meaning and purpose to life then all the external love in the world will have no impact on them. We need to find out own individual meaning/purpose/happiness to be able to appreciate what we get from others and in turn provide same back to them which is why the argument. A person who 'lives for others' is a zombie.

[BellaBellucci]

I am not talking about the 7-11 lady or anything like that. I believe it is impossible to live life and not have someone who cares about you. Some may not say they care, but they do.

I dont think it is possible to live and not have someone who cares about them. The only way I think that can happen is if someone is a shut in and never ever ever leaves the house.

There is only one person on this earth that I continue to live for and he's my 8-year old son. If I didn't get split custody in my divorce, you and I would not be having this conversation. Trust.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

....and shouldn't we be living for ourselves anyways? Isn't an individual's happiness tied to how they see themselves, what they enjoy, who they enjoy, and why they enjoy? It doesn't matter if a million people are madly in love with someone, if they can't find their own meaning and purpose to life then all the external love in the world will have no impact on them. We need to find out own individual meaning/purpose/happiness to be able to appreciate what we get from others and in turn provide same back to them which is why the argument. A person who 'lives for others' is a zombie.
I dont think people should live for others. I just think the "no one cares about me" excuse for suicide is not a good one. I just think everyone has at least 1 person who cares about them, and that suicicde hurts them, not just the person comitting the act.

[youshouldtrythislol]

There is only one person on this earth that I continue to live for and he's my 8-year old son. If I didn't get split custody in my divorce, you and I would not be having this conversation. Trust.

~BB~
well, i am glad you got split custody. I dont get it though, if you had not gotten split custody, why would you just give up, if that is your reason for living? seems to me that you would want to fight for him, not just give up.

I just think nothing is worth killing yourself over, thats just me. My life is not good, but I live and fight to make it better.

[runningdownthatdream]

There is only one person on this earth that I continue to live for and he's my 8-year old son. If I didn't get split custody in my divorce, you and I would not be having this conversation. Trust.

~BB~

I've been there - trust!

[SugaSweet]

Nothing in this life which I've been trying
can equal or surpass the Art of Dying.

[BellaBellucci]

well, i am glad you got split custody. I dont get it though, if you had not gotten split custody, why would you just give up, if that is your reason for living? seems to me that you would want to fight for him, not just give up.

I just think nothing is worth killing yourself over, thats just me. My life is not good, but I live and fight to make it better.

You don't know my ex. If she ever got full control of his life that would have been the end of me in his eyes. I wouldn't have been a parent anymore. I would have been a monthly check. There were other considerations as well but let's just say that circumstances have had me staring into the abyss on a few occasions throughout my life and I don't regret any of it.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

I do not know your situation. I just believe that we shouldnt give up on the things that matter to us. No matter how bad life gets for me, and it has gotten pretty bad, I plan on fighting for the things and people I care about untill the day I die, and I do not intend to rush that day any.

[BellaBellucci]

I do not know your situation. I just believe that we shouldnt give up on the things that matter to us. No matter how bad life gets for me, and it has gotten pretty bad, I plan on fighting for the things and people I care about untill the day I die, and I do not intend to rush that day any.

Apparently you've never been rock bottom then. What I'm saying is that for me to have continued to fight something like that I would have had to dedicate my entire life to it and get almost nothing in return and what kind of life is that? In the end it only hurts the child anyway. Get it now? Stop belittling my pain. Geez.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

I have hit rock bottom. There are times I think I am permanantly there. But I am too stuborn to quit. One day I will be able to rise up from rock bottom and say f&^k you to everyone who has tried and succeeded at ruining my life. I am not trying to belittle your pain. I am sorry it is precieved as such.

[BellaBellucci]

I have hit rock bottom. There are times I think I am permanantly there. But I am too stuborn to quit. One day I will be able to rise up from rock bottom and say f&^k you to everyone who has tried and succeeded at ruining my life. I am not trying to belittle your pain. I am sorry it is precieved as such.

Just understand that that is only an opinion. I'm not particularly receptive to moral dictation, nor are most other people who have ever considered suicide. Continuing to argue the issue that it's better to live only makes us dig in and want to end it more because it hits us like the magic mirror from Snow White and it's depressing and corny when you argue that 'life isn't that bad.' For some people it is and when someone says that it is, you should respect that and tread lightly when trying to show them otherwise.

I'm not mad, I'm just trying to share some insight from someone who knows much more about the subject than she'd like to.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

Just understand that that is only an opinion. I'm not particularly receptive to moral dictation, nor are most other people who have ever considered suicide. Continuing to argue the issue that it's better to live only makes us dig in and want to end it more because it hits us like the magic mirror from Snow White and it's depressing and corny when you argue that 'life isn't that bad.' For some people it is and when someone says that it is, you should respect that and tread lightly when trying to show them otherwise.

I'm not mad, I'm just trying to share some insight from someone who knows much more about the subject than she'd like to.

~BB~
I understand. I am no motivational speaker. I am not saying "life isn't that bad". hell, life may never get better. But there is a better chance of it getting better if you are alive than if you are already dead. I tend to precieve things differently than most. I think I shall quit now, before I make things worse for anyone reading my words.

[BellaBellucci]

I understand. I am no motivational speaker. I am not saying "life isn't that bad". hell, life may never get better. But there is a better chance of it getting better if you are alive than if you are already dead. I tend to precieve things differently than most. I think I shall quit now, before I make things worse for anyone reading my words.

No, actually that was better. It's a hard convo to have with the rational personal who is considering suicide. For them, your logical argument better be damn good or you might just reinforce their negative outlook and talk them into it. It's better to only say truthful things like 'there's help,' not those subject to opinion.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

There are 3 approaches one could take, technically, to persuade someone. The method that is best is based on the person. I am no good at that type of stuff though. I understand suicide an option open to everyone. I just hope no one chooses suicide. I hope I never come on HA and see a thread about you or anyone else like I unfortunately saw for Bridget.

[BellaBellucci]

There are 3 approaches one could take, technically, to persuade someone. The method that is best is based on the person. I am no good at that type of stuff though. I understand suicide an option open to everyone. I just hope no one chooses suicide. I hope I never come on HA and see a thread about you or anyone else like I unfortunately saw for Bridget.

I'm better now. I'm still rebuilding my life of course, but I can say unequivocally, for a fact, that my path could have very easily veered off over a cliff. It's nothing to be ashamed of despite what so many people seem to think. I survived. Some people aren't so lucky and we need to remember that.

~BB~

[Deimos]

The good die young... I've seemed to notice that statement couldn't be more true.

Everyday is a struggle to survive in this fucked up world. The rich get richer, the poor get poorer. In a matter of two to three years the US Dollar will no longer be the reserve currency. With all the obstacles thrown in front of us as a society, and then our individual problems... It's not hard to see where suicide wouldn't be an option. Some people feel that's their way out of all of it. Is it a good idea? Well not really but who is anyone to judge?

[BellaBellucci]

The good die young... I've seemed to notice that statement couldn't be more true.

Everyday is a struggle to survive in this fucked up world. The rich get richer, the poor get poorer. In a matter of two to three years the US Dollar will no longer be the reserve currency. With all the obstacles thrown in front of us as a society, and then our individual problems... It's not hard to see where suicide wouldn't be an option. Some people feel that's their way out of all of it. Is it a good idea? Well not really but who is anyone to judge?

Exactly. Judgement only makes a person feel even more isolated.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

I dont think contemplating suicide is anything to be ashamed of. I think one who has contemplated it and did not do it is stronger for it.

[BellaBellucci]

I dont think contemplating suicide is anything to be ashamed of. I think one who has contemplated it and did not do it is stronger for it.

Agree 1000%. But that doesn't mean it's right for everyone. Some people MAY POSSIBLY, whether anyone wants to admit it or not, be better off dead. Their future could be nothing but guaranteed suffering. Look at medical euthanasia for instance.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

I think there is a difference between euthanasia and suicide. I fully support euthanasia if someone is terminally ill, if that is their choice.

I think the ones who are better off dead are the assholes and the ones who only live to bring others down. The rapists, murderers, the ones who spread suffering and misery in their wake.

[BellaBellucci]

I think there is a difference between euthanasia and suicide. I fully support euthanasia if someone is terminally ill, if that is their choice.

I think the ones who are better off dead are the assholes and the ones who only live to bring others down. The rapists, murderers, the ones who spread suffering and misery in their wake.

Typical double-standard. Physical pain trumps emotional pain in the validity of suicide? Why is that? Because we don't want to think we can be responsible for pushing a depressed person over the edge? We don't want to think that mental illness could make a person suffer just as much? Sorry, but... no.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

not a doue standard., emotional pain is not going to eat away at your body and physically kill you. physical pain, like cancer eating away at ones body, will definitavely kill you. you cant talk to anyone or do anything to make that go away. emotional pain on the other hand, you can talk to people who care, and what not, you can soothe it if not totally get rid of it for a time. i only support euthanasia if the person is 100% going to die at somepoint soon, and there is absolutely no way to change it.

[BellaBellucci]

not a doue standard., emotional pain is not going to eat away at your body and physically kill you.

Oh really? You honestly believe that emotional pain doesn't cause physical pain? Seriously? :geek:

http://www.livestrong.com/article/28799-depression-affect-body/

Ok, I think this would be your cue to hush up if you don't mind. You're back to belittling again.

I had my first stress-related occurrence of terrible acid reflux disease/ulcer when I was only 15. For almost a year I could hardly stand up straight. Thank Gods for the original purple pill, but that wasn't my last ailment caused by stress by a long shot.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

I know emotional pain causes physical pain. It can cause a lot of physical pain. but it does not cause terminal diseases quickly. I know the effects of emotional pain. The downside to emotional pain is that it builds and gets worse over time. I think emotional pain can be 'treated' easier than cancer, as cancer has no cure.

[BellaBellucci]

I know emotional pain causes physical pain. It can cause a lot of physical pain. but it does not cause terminal diseases quickly. I know the effects of emotional pain. The downside to emotional pain is that it builds and gets worse over time. I think emotional pain can be 'treated' easier than cancer, as cancer has no cure.

Terminal? Not usually. Chronic? Absolutely. Especially if one has a chronic or long-standing psychological or emotional issue like depression or bi-polar disorder to go with it. Come on now, smarten up. How much time should a person have to live in misery?

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

agreed. but we were not talking about chronic now were we? lol. emotional pain can also be the cause of phyhological and emotional issues such as depression in those who do not usually have issues such as those.

on a side note, i must say, i enjoy talking with you, you certainly know how to have intellegent conversation, you put thought into your posts, most dont.

[Deimos]

Terminal? Not usually. Chronic? Absolutely. Especially if one has a chronic or long-standing psychological or emotional issue like depression or bi-polar disorder to go with it. Come on now, smarten up.

~BB~

I couldn't have said it better myself. Much respect to you ma'm.

[BellaBellucci]

agreed. but we were not talking about chronic now were we? lol. emotional pain can also be the cause of phyhological and emotional issues such as depression in those who do not usually have issues such as those.

on a side note, i must say, i enjoy talking with you, you certainly know how to have intellegent conversation, you put thought into your posts, most dont.

Thanks hon. And I'm sorry if I come off harshly. This is a subject to which I've devoted a lot of thought in my life.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

you are fine. I have unfortunately also had a lot of time to think about it and witness it in action.

[russtafa]

Never give the bastards the satisfaction

[BellaBellucci]

Never give the bastards the satisfaction

... and there's the other reason I'm still here. :lol:

In all seriousness though, that's pretty much the attitude that's kept me alive this long.

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

... and there's the other reason I'm still here. :lol:

In all seriousness though, that's pretty much the attitude that's kept me alive this long.

~BB~
That is my attitude as well. as i said earlier. one day i will be able to say "f&^k you, you took your best shot and i am still standing" to those who have tried and succeeded in ruining my life.

[BellaBellucci]

That is my attitude as well. as i said earlier. one day i will be able to say "f&^k you, you took your best shot and i am still standing" to those who have tried and succeeded in ruining my life.

Of course, but I just wanted to remind everyone that it doesn't make those who didn't survive any less important. Everyone's circumstances are different and there's no sense in blaming anyone. That's all. Much respect. :yingyang:

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

those who did not survive are definately still important. we should remember them as they were, and maybe learn from them where it is possible. the ones to blame are technically the ones who are also the ones who only live to make others miserable.

[BellaBellucci]

those who did not survive are definately still important. we should remember them as they were, and maybe learn from them where it is possible. the ones to blame are technically the ones who are also the ones who only live to make others miserable.

... which was the point of the OP.

/thread :lol:

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

well, it seemes i made a point that was already made by someone who is far wiser than i will ever be. lol.

[BellaBellucci]

well, it seemes i made a point that was already made by someone who is far wiser than i will ever be. lol.

Who? Rush Limbaugh? Glenn Beck? :lol: j/k

Awwwwwwwwww! *blush*

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

now now, we can't have blushing in a thread questioning the good of life. lol. (kidding)

[BellaBellucci]

now now, we can't have blushing in a thread questioning the good of life. lol. (kidding)

Actually, it was about the fairness of life and somehow derailed. :lol:

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

i was just going with the thread title lol. but fairness of life to blushing is not terribly derailed compaired to some of the train wreck threads around here lol.

[BellaBellucci]

i was just going with the thread title lol. but fairness of life to blushing is not terribly derailed compaired to some of the train wreck threads around here lol.

Yeah, really. :lol:

~BB~

[youshouldtrythislol]

lol. to contribute to the train wreck farther or leave it alone, that is the question. lol.

[GrimFusion]

As I said in the Bridget thread,, I have had people I know commit suicide. I have even tried to off myself but i failed as is obvious. But I have the scars and i still cut from time to time cause to me it re-leaves some of the pain. Don't ask me how, it just does. but for the most part when things get rough I just hide away. I just stay in a room for days on end till I feel I can leave again, this helps and it's better than suicide.


But still,, for me,, I still feel that suicide is an option. While yes it is sad and I admit that, but I do believe for me it is a choice. I have no one,, very few friends to miss me,, no family, they rejected me years ago, there will be no one left behind to cry or care so the reason that suicide will hurt others is not there for me. I am not suicidal, I am of very sound mind, I just feel that when the day comes that I should have the option of leaving the world on my terms.

I am very saddened when someone else kills themselves, this hurts me, but for myself I feel differently and i should be able end things on my terms and not from some nut job with a knife or gun.

While i say that I don't care what people think of me,, still, it does hurt when people call me nasty names, throw things like bottles at me, being used by assholes,, getting beat up,,and some other bad shit that I can't talk about, I get scared every night walking home,, there is always someone following me or it's got to the point where I think there are people hiding in the shadows. I get very nervous sometimes just thinking about the next night I go out. So to make myself feel better, I stay home for long periods of time till i am able to go out again,, these words from Simon and Garfunkel tell it all.


I have my books
And my poetry to protect me;
I am shielded in my armor,
Hiding in my room, safe within my womb.
I touch no one and no one touches me.


PS- Again, I am not suicidal, I may never kill myself,, but I just feel that for me that it is an option for when things get to much. As the title says, "What Fucking Good Is Life"? Maybe a good answer to that question is needed.

You're SOOOO goth you shit bats and your bats shit bats too, eh? lol. I'm not trying to make fun of ya. I did the whole gothic metal thing for about a decade and I still dig the tunes. It just sorta worries me that you spent so much time explaining that you probably wouldn't attempt suicide again. Overemphasize much? Ever tell a lie you fool yourself into believing?

[yodajazz]

Originally Posted by yodajazz http://www.hungangels.com/vboard/images/ca_serenity/buttons/viewpost.gif (http://www.hungangels.com/vboard/showthread.php?p=917594#post917594) ... someone is probably conspiring at this very moment to hook you up with one of their friends. People love to be match makers. You dont even have to go out and look, it you dont feel like it. In fact, I bet that they wanted to hook you up before, but you were in a relationship already. People love to cheer someone up, who has just broken up. Originally Posted by yodajazz http://www.hungangels.com/vboard/images/ca_serenity/buttons/viewpost.gif (http://www.hungangels.com/vboard/showthread.php?p=917594#post917594) ... someone is probably conspiring at this very moment to hook you up with one of their friends. People love to be match makers. You dont even have to go out and look, it you dont feel like it. In fact, I bet that they wanted to hook you up before, but you were in a relationship already. People love to cheer someone up, who has just broken up.


This sounds like pure fairy tale. I have never witnessed anyone doing this for anyone, ever.

It's happened to me more than once, including my longest relationship. Another woman, sought me out, to introduce me to her friend. It helps if you on good terms with females. They speak to each other, about their feelings, much more than males. So they tell thier girlfriends, they want to find a 'good man', etc. A true friend, who is secure within herself, will hook a friend up, and maybe you too, if you ask. I get the feeling that t-girls tend to be more competitive. But I believe they may do the same thing, under the right circumstances. So from my own experience, I tell lonely people to be patient, find happiness today, be good, and the rest will take care of itself.

[GrimFusion]

Life sucks. You're right. Some have it better. Some have it worse. Some people claim their life is completely ruined because their sunroof broke, and some squallier for survival because they have no food and refuse to complain about it. The most afflicted are the talented and kind people who obviously deserve more than they have because they put in the effort and fate slaps them in the face with a fail-glove... with rhinestones. I'm an Atheist because life blows. So much for god being omnipotent or giving a shit, I guess. lol.

Getting a little revenge on people who screw me over kinda keeps me going. It helps lift my spirits again.

[dderek123]

Well if I was dead I couldn't watch TS porn and rub one out anymore. +1 for living!

[traLika]

I'm sorry Bella if I misunderstood your original thought on this thread, sometimes I don't understand things all that good.

But I gotta make a response to what has been said since i made my post.

I am not a coward,, well i am a coward in some ways but for the most part I think I'm not
the upper end of the coward scale. I know that life is what one makes it and many people
get rough spots in their life and they should move on, I understand this. But i had bad shit
happen to me in my past, when I was young and for the most part I got through it,, OK I did make an attempt
on my life cause there was extreme pain, but i am still here. The reason that I say that I
have the choice to end it on my terms is cause of the things that happened to me. I am tired of the nightmares.
Yes, i got through the rough patches but the nightmares remain in my head and won't go away.
I do understand that there are people who suffer much worse than I, like people in Dafur for example.
But I am not inside of their heads, i only know what is inside my head. I only know of my nightmares
and the fear. I don't want the nightmares and I am tired of lving in fear, so i feel that one day when the
pain gets to be too much, which I feel will one day happen, then I should have the choice of ending my life.
I am hurting no one cause i have no friends or family. People I met online would never even know what
happened to me. There would just be no more posts on forums from me. I do hope there is a better place
we go to when we die but I don't care about that, I am not looking for a better place, i just want the
nightmares and pain to end.

Again, I am not a coward, I grew up in the Bronx, had many fights and battles with people that wanted to harm me,,
lost most of the fights but still I tried. It's just that there will come a time when I say that I have had enough and will choose to kill myself. I hurt no one but myself.

Again,, Bella I'm sorry if my post was wrong but I had to make it, sorry.

Sorry to hear about your bad experiences and nightmares and I really hope things get better for you. We’re here if you want someone to talk to. Take care.

[traLika]

"suicide is cowardly" is one of those oft repeated statements that, like most other blanket statements...isn't really true.
Most of the time, when we hear that a person takes their own life...we rarely know that person or the complete reason for the action. It's a personal act ...so it's often ridiculous to judge the act ...especially when one doesn't really know the individual in question.

What I do find ironic however is that most of the people I've known or have come in contact with, that decided to end their life...were infinitely more interesting personalities whose value on this planet would've been far greater than some of the vile, ignorant, petty and useless creatures who would claw and scratch to protect their own pathetic skins from even the slightest harm.

...and that's a real shame.

Well said!

[joeninety]

I know emotional pain causes physical pain. It can cause a lot of physical pain. but it does not cause terminal diseases quickly. I know the effects of emotional pain. The downside to emotional pain is that it builds and gets worse over time. I think emotional pain can be 'treated' easier than cancer, as cancer has no cure.


You are wrong if your mental state is constantly one of anguish torment and stress that has all kinds of negative physiological responses on the body and to constantly keep the body in a flight or fight response will no doubt kill you through heart attacks strokes etc human beings were not designed nor evolved to function like this.

If you are mentally broken it is on par with being physically broken, but because you can't see a diseased persons mind as opposed to looking at a broken leg people fail to grasp the suffering that people can go through having to endure mental pain, i have noticed some people on here get quite dismissive that mental pain can be that bad and have little understanding of how grave that situation is for someone who is going through such mental turmoil, people are wired into seeing and believing, and if they can't physically see it people struggle to understand it or possibly believe that things can be that bad, but sad to say it they can.

[Birgitta]

I find your words deeply moving and somewhat alarming Brigit. I look at your little avatar picture and make assumptions I probably have no bussiness making not knowing you personally. I think...my gawd...what a beautiful lady, stunning in fact, and what a pleasure to be able to share her company should circumstances find us face to face. But I guess behind all of our pictures are the unseen anxieties. Jackson Browne's lyrics to "The Photograph" seem fitting ...

"You've known that hollow feeling of your own steps in flight
You've had to hide sometimes but now you're allright
And it's good to see your smiling face tonight"

I think you're a beautiful lady and the world needs more beautiful ladies !
xoxo

haha shit I should take that picture down... because it is not me but Marianne Faithfull. But thanks for the kind words anyway lol. I bet she would appreciate it :D

I dont like my picture on the internet, I love to keep a low profile. But it's not like I am the frankensteinmonster like I figured out yesterday when a guy started flirting with me...I dont even look that bad, but I think I do. lol. I think I look terrible.

Do any of the girls here have that problem too, a phase (because I hope that is it) that self worth becomes almost linked with looks, when I see something in the mirror I dont like, I not only judge my looks, but judge my heart/soul character etc

[youshouldtrythislol]

You are wrong if your mental state is constantly one of anguish torment and stress that has all kinds of negative physiological responses on the body and to constantly keep the body in a flight or fight response will no doubt kill you through heart attacks strokes etc human beings were not designed nor evolved to function like this.

If you are mentally broken it is on par with being physically broken, but because you can't see a diseased persons mind as opposed to looking at a broken leg people fail to grasp the suffering that people can go through having to endure mental pain, i have noticed some people on here get quite dismissive that mental pain can be that bad and have little understanding of how grave that situation is for someone who is going through such mental turmoil, people are wired into seeing and believing, and if they can't physically see it people struggle to understand it or possibly believe that things can be that bad, but sad to say it they can.
I dont disagree. Emotional pain can lead to a great deal of physical pain. my point was though, that emotional pain can (somewhat) be treated, through talking to someone, etc, where cancer has no cure yet.

[for-ward]

We have a lot of problems in our society. There's so much negative feedback in the media and it really does shape people's lives more than they know. Most of it teaches to NOT respect yourselves, that wasting your life away reading tabloids, watching Oprah and worrying about what people will say if you wear the wrong article of clothing is the "NORM" thing to do. It's not. There is no "NORM" thing to do. Just be happy, respect yourselves and others and try to enjoy life as much as possible without wasting time on drugs, negative people, loser partners that have no respect for you, family members who treat you like dirt, theives, liars etc.....

YOU only have one life, that's it. Why waste time on foolishness? Nobody controls your future only you. If you have a loser partner, ditch them. If your job sucks, then try looking for another one(after you have a few months rent saved first). Surround yourself with positive, friendly people. Forget about badboys, gangsters, thugs, PLAYERS. These guys are losers, they never grew up which is way they can't commit. Most men secretly laugh at these guys simply because they'll never know what life is really about.
Love, family, support, kindness, friendships not selfishness, dishonesty and corruption.

[BigDF]

haha shit I should take that picture down... because it is not me but Marianne Faithfull. But thanks for the kind words anyway lol. I bet she would appreciate it :D

I dont like my picture on the internet, I love to keep a low profile. But it's not like I am the frankensteinmonster like I figured out yesterday when a guy started flirting with me...I dont even look that bad, but I think I do. lol. I think I look terrible.

Do any of the girls here have that problem too, a phase (because I hope that is it) that self worth becomes almost linked with looks, when I see something in the mirror I dont like, I not only judge my looks, but judge my heart/soul character etcIf that was you peeking out from behind Big Bird in your old avatar shot Birgitta, then I think you are pretty cute. A little unsolicited advice: Stop thinking you look terrible, because it's going to show on your face. Your words on here show that you are a beautiful person on the inside as well as a valuable member of our society. Believe that about yourself, then take another look in the mirror. Smile at the person you see there and tell that person that you love her. It might take awhile before she believes you, but trust me it's worth the effort. Always remember that the most beautiful thing you can wear is a smile.:)

[Birgitta]

If that was you peeking out from behind Big Bird in your old avatar shot Birgitta, then I think you are pretty cute. A little unsolicited advice: Stop thinking you look terrible, because it's going to show on your face. Your words on here show that you are a beautiful person on the inside as well as a valuable member of our society. Believe that about yourself, then take another look in the mirror. Smile at the person you see there and tell that person that you love her. It might take awhile before she believes you, but trust me it's worth the effort. Always remember that the most beautiful thing you can wear is a smile.:)

Hi BigDf, thanks. Yes I should think more positive about myself. Still I am very insecure about how I look, I think this is because of my past, I freak out when I think I dont look good enough, because it makes me think that it will be harder then to find love in life, and the beauty of the gg's I see around me everyday can also be so intimidating. And also because when you are a TS, people are more accepting when you look nice.

I feel very happy when men flirt with me, usually they are the player-type of guy, the attention is nice though!!
Its always nice when a guy shows interest and makes a compliment. But the good guys dont flirt much :).

I should be more proud of myself I know it helps... because when I feel great and happy and am shining, sometimes I even get jealous looks from some gg. lol But that is pure madness... girls get jealous so easely.

When I was still living as a boy I never felt I had to compete with them and I did not feel as judged by others as I do now....

[BigDF]

Hi BigDf, thanks. Yes I should think more positive about myself. Still I am very insecure about how I look, I think this is because of my past, I freak out when I think I dont look good enough, because it makes me think that it will be harder then to find love in life, and the beauty of the gg's I see around me everyday can also be so intimidating. And also because when you are a TS, people are more accepting when you look nice.

I feel very happy when men flirt with me, usually they are the player-type of guy, the attention is nice though!!
Its always nice when a guy shows interest and makes a compliment. But the good guys dont flirt much :).

I should be more proud of myself I know it helps... because when I feel great and happy and am shining, sometimes I even get jealous looks from some gg. lol But that is pure madness... girls get jealous so easely.

When I was still living as a boy I never felt I had to compete with them and I did not feel as judged by others as I do now....I think what you're talking about here is common to most women, both gg and tg. Even the beautiful ones who might intimidate you have their own insecurities. Let's face it we live in a somewhat shallow society who tend to judge each other on physical appearance. But the next time you're intimidated by a person you think is better looking that you, check out her eyes and you might be surprised by what you see.

Birgitta, you are responsible for your own happiness and I'll tell you the truth sometimes you just have to fake it, especially when you're really feeling shitty because that's when you need it the most.

The reason most good guys don't flirt much is that they suffer the same insecurities as you. I suspect that the reason you didn't compete with the other boys when you lived that way is that you already knew you were a girl. Trust me, we compare ourselves to other males all the time.

[kaiser1one]

Clearly you thought about suicide sometime in your past, didn't do it, and maybe you decided you're happier now. Then again if you were happy, I don't think you'd be as bitter as you sound?

Not criticism towards you, but likewise try not to be harshly judgemental against someone that chose a path other than one you think is noble. That Nietzsche-like attitude was, well......what Nietzsche espoused but when you look at his life, it was pretty pathetic and spent in his later years bitter, pining after a woman that didn't care about him until going mad, and dying alone and raving. He just talked a tough game but ultimately he died weak and alone as we all will.....what does it matter if it's by your own hand or that of nature?

Nope never thought about suicide. Does it sound like it? Can't help that. I love living. No matter how shitty its gotten for me.
Well an opinion is just that. Take it with a shot of salt.


This is a rich post and kind of lacking in empathy at the end of the day did you know what was going on inside that girls head, maybe inside it was a kind of hell you could never comprehend, its all well and good you sitting up there throwing your judgements down but until you have walked a mile in the persons shoes you cannot be qualified to judge.

Are you ts probably not do you live on the fringes of society again with that type of attitude probably not, so in your world being a normal accepted member of society everything is already going be less of a struggle, until you have had to endure such struggle on top of any mental issues this girl may of had i wouldn't be so quick to lord it about on your high horse.

I wouldn't say its cowardice to kill yourself in fact being as human nature is all about survival and whatever else on top you would have to be pretty brave or ill to want to do what is in essence against your true encoded nature, some people are just to nice and not tough enough to endure the sometimes harshness of this life.

I can imagine that being ts that harshness is endured everyday and like i say if you have to carry that kind burden through no fault of your own and be looked down upon by gen pop i imagine that that type of existence is going to be hard, couple that type of reality and possible mental issues with someone of a sweet nature then having to live that life, then it is kind of obvious to see why they might not want to live it and would rather choose death but you my friend you could never understand this as you have never lived it and you clearly lack empathy to fathom such a reality.

Bah, I know people who's lives suck ultimate ass and they still tread through it.

Normal? No one in this world is normal.

Everyone's a different case. Not every TS is ridiculed, insulted and spat upon daily.

Yea yea, the typical don't judge me talk. Your last sentence, any other sensitive person, would spout nonsense about you judging them as well. I don't care. Not that this has anything to do with anything.


I'm sorry Bella if I misunderstood your original thought on this thread, sometimes I don't understand things all that good.

But I gotta make a response to what has been said since i made my post.

I am not a coward,, well i am a coward in some ways but for the most part I think I'm not
the upper end of the coward scale. I know that life is what one makes it and many people
get rough spots in their life and they should move on, I understand this. But i had bad shit
happen to me in my past, when I was young and for the most part I got through it,, OK I did make an attempt
on my life cause there was extreme pain, but i am still here. The reason that I say that I
have the choice to end it on my terms is cause of the things that happened to me. I am tired of the nightmares.
Yes, i got through the rough patches but the nightmares remain in my head and won't go away.
I do understand that there are people who suffer much worse than I, like people in Dafur for example.
But I am not inside of their heads, i only know what is inside my head. I only know of my nightmares
and the fear. I don't want the nightmares and I am tired of lving in fear, so i feel that one day when the
pain gets to be too much, which I feel will one day happen, then I should have the choice of ending my life.
I am hurting no one cause i have no friends or family. People I met online would never even know what
happened to me. There would just be no more posts on forums from me. I do hope there is a better place
we go to when we die but I don't care about that, I am not looking for a better place, i just want the
nightmares and pain to end.

Again, I am not a coward, I grew up in the Bronx, had many fights and battles with people that wanted to harm me,,
lost most of the fights but still I tried. It's just that there will come a time when I say that I have had enough and will choose to kill myself. I hurt no one but myself.

Again,, Bella I'm sorry if my post was wrong but I had to make it, sorry.

Did you try to end yourself and just survived? Or did you not go through with it?

I know someone who had a fucked child hood. They've continued living on and haven't even attempted suicide.


Im glad you guys are understanding and intelligent.

And btw I think the reasons for wanting to end life are just too personal, sometimes people cannot even think of a reason why, they have had a normal life, money jobs children, but they simply want to end it.
Figure that out.

I know from my own experience having genderdysforia can be (and feel) like hell, and it does not suprise me others end it. I find it understandable. I keep going on because I have done so in my life so far and lately have not been driven to the edge just yet, but I could easely fall. Life is so fragile.

Today I want to live it, and am thankfull for it.
But tommorow is unsure. And I know it!

Love
Birgit

Then those person's are fucked in the head and should seek some medical help BEFORE they do something stupid like kill their family and then themselves.

Sure, but care to what point? I'm not going to continue living a miserable existence for the 7-11 lady or the manager of my hotel because they 'care' so much about me. That's why it's a cop-out answer.

There are truly people out there who have NO intimate or close relationships to anyone.

~BB~

Only people who are alone like that are people who purposely isolate themselves.


Terminal? Not usually. Chronic? Absolutely. Especially if one has a chronic or long-standing psychological or emotional issue like depression or bi-polar disorder to go with it. Come on now, smarten up. How much time should a person have to live in misery?

~BB~

As long as they are actively seeking a way to get out of said misery. Instead of offing themselves and taking a quick way out.

[lisaparadise]

I think what you're talking about here is common to most women, both gg and tg. Even the beautiful ones who might intimidate you have their own insecurities. Let's face it we live in a somewhat shallow society who tend to judge each other on physical appearance. But the next time you're intimidated by a person you think is better looking that you, check out her eyes and you might be surprised by what you see.

Birgitta, you are responsible for your own happiness and I'll tell you the truth sometimes you just have to fake it, especially when you're really feeling shitty because that's when you need it the most.

The reason most good guys don't flirt much is that they suffer the same insecurities as you. I suspect that the reason you didn't compete with the other boys when you lived that way is that you already knew you were a girl. Trust me, we compare ourselves to other males all the time.makes sence,this whole talk about suicie and unhappiness is very depressing.we all lost a great girl last week and for what?a meaningly guy,,,,, unfuckingbelievable,,, i just dont get it,nobodys and i mean nobody is worth taking your own life.i like everyone else here who is a parent knows axactly how i feel right now the anger stage is kicking in and im so pissed that nobody seen it coming that she didnt trust anyone enough to confide in them that really really shocks the hell outta me.sometimes ya just cant save the ones who didnt wanna be saved but that cant be the case with bridget her eyes told a different story.we all wanna place blame on somebody else but the ultimate blame has to be set apon her and somehow somewhere i really hope bridget is looking down on us and this board with a tear in her eyes because if she didnt know it then she sure as hell knows it now just how much we all loved her and will miss that beautifull smile.

[wendell]

What good is life? I suppose that depends on how you view the alternative Bella. I've experienced a modicum of death in a professional capacity and this has tempered by burningly desperate though deeply sceptical passion for the existence of something, anything after death, into a dull, near certainty that there is nothing but this mortal coil.

Given that position then for me, personally, the good of life is just about everything. Stroke a cat, eat an apple pleasurable if you like cats and apples and pleasure is far better than what I suspect is the alternative. I don't want to end, my experiences of death have seared that desire into me but without significant medical advances i'm going to have to face that nadir one day. In the face of that I take pleasure whenever and wherever I can get it and I hope to acheive a kind of quasi immortality by enduring on in the effect my life has on the world.

Basically, in my opinion, couched in intellectual mastabationary vocabulary the good of life is that we've got it. From what i've seen it's worth clinging on to. When life is unfair fuck it. Ensure you are a bastion of fairness. When life offers you pain fuck it. Ensure you find pleasure. Only when your ability to have a positive effect on the world [through your own moral code] and have lost the ability to experience pleasure in your lie should you relax your grasp on it.

Youve been dealt some rough cards Bella, no doubt about that. But you're young, intelligent and you're good looking. The cards could have been a lot worse and your ability to effect the world and experience pleasure is vastly higher than many. Go for it girl while the going's good.

[lisaparadise]

I can relate to your sentiment in a lot of ways, and while I don't condone suicide, I do believe in the right of a person to make that choice. However, the topic of this thread wasn't intended to encourage a discussion on that topic, but simply to point out that life isn't fair. It wasn't intended to be taken so literally and out of context like that. Please don't misunderstand.

~BB~life is more then fair,im not sure where your coming from on this but from what i see you have more then enough to be happy.i have had 5 decades 5 amazing decades and i wouldnt change a damn thing.ive had the best of both worlds living as a boy and a father to living as a girl and a mom and its all been so awesome and ive been so blessed to have my children who love me unconditionally.life is so short and although i know i have only a couple years left on earth i can honestly say ive done everything i set out to do and have become the total person ive wished to be my entire life and when i look back i know ill always have a smile and a warm heart and it doesnt get much better then that.

[Birgitta]

I think what you're talking about here is common to most women, both gg and tg. Even the beautiful ones who might intimidate you have their own insecurities. Let's face it we live in a somewhat shallow society who tend to judge each other on physical appearance. But the next time you're intimidated by a person you think is better looking that you, check out her eyes and you might be surprised by what you see.

Birgitta, you are responsible for your own happiness and I'll tell you the truth sometimes you just have to fake it, especially when you're really feeling shitty because that's when you need it the most.

The reason most good guys don't flirt much is that they suffer the same insecurities as you. I suspect that the reason you didn't compete with the other boys when you lived that way is that you already knew you were a girl. Trust me, we compare ourselves to other males all the time.



Hi BigDF,

Nice talking to ya!
About the good guy with good intentions...perhaps it is because he cares about others he cares how she reacts to him flirting...

The players care little when you turn them down....and when they got you, they even care less lol.
Still I always let them know I appreciate it when they flirt, this is also the best way to get rid of them... well that, and telling them you have a bf. lol

The reason I did not compete with boys was because I learned very young... like 3/4 years old... I just could not compete with them lol. So I gave up very fast. I should have been a girl/woman, because now that I am, I find myself comparing myself constantly to other woman, whereas before, I really was not part of the game of life at all. When I was young I always looked up to girls... but I could not be one myself.

I like it what you said... about faking happyness...perhaps that is better then surrendering yourself to a gloomy state of beeing.

xxx
hugs
Birgitta

[DL_NL]

There are hard times in almost everyone's life, I'm going through a rough patch myself at the time. Still, I try to make the best of it and remember the good days, and actively work at making the most of what's going round. I agree that it's almost more trouble than it's worth at times, but there's always just enough to keep me going.

If there are enough lows to compare them to, the highs just seem higher.

[LittleGuy]

Nope never thought about suicide. Does it sound like it? Can't help that. I love living. No matter how shitty its gotten for me.
Well an opinion is just that. Take it with a shot of salt.



Bah, I know people who's lives suck ultimate ass and they still tread through it.

Normal? No one in this world is normal.

Everyone's a different case. Not every TS is ridiculed, insulted and spat upon daily.

Yea yea, the typical don't judge me talk. Your last sentence, any other sensitive person, would spout nonsense about you judging them as well. I don't care. Not that this has anything to do with anything.



Did you try to end yourself and just survived? Or did you not go through with it?

I know someone who had a fucked child hood. They've continued living on and haven't even attempted suicide.



Then those person's are fucked in the head and should seek some medical help BEFORE they do something stupid like kill their family and then themselves.


Only people who are alone like that are people who purposely isolate themselves.



As long as they are actively seeking a way to get out of said misery. Instead of offing themselves and taking a quick way out.

I've never thought about suicide either even when my gf left me while I was deployed or witnessing many of my men die right in front of me. You may think your life sucks but nothing is worth killing yourself over.

[joeninety]

[QUOTE=kaiser1one;918547]Nope never thought about suicide. Does it sound like it? Can't help that. I love living. No matter how shitty its gotten for me.
Well an opinion is just that. Take it with a shot of salt.

Its a psychopaths opinion judging from its coldness and lack of feeling guess that is why suicide would never be an issue for you because it sounds like you emotionally detached at a certain level your just a cold ass wolf survivor and i guess from your true perspective the suicidal are just weak little lambs, well whooppy do for being such a cold soul metaphorically speaking, as i'm sure that you don't believe you have one



Bah, I know people who's lives suck ultimate ass and they still tread through it.

Oh looky here, well done on your weak attempt at empathy lol, what can i say apart from well done for knowing people whose lives suck ass where do you want me to pin your medal.



Normal? No one in this world is normal.

Shit something i agree with on damn thats not meant to happen, agreed there isn't really a true definition of a normal person per se, but there is a kind of norm you know boy meets girl get 9-5's makes babies and grow old then there are others slightly beyond this say boy meets boy, girl meets girl etc then there is ts which is further beyond the so called norm on the edges of the so called normals spectrum.
let me break it down to you another way trying not to be emotive as from what little i see you do seem to fit the psychopathic definition so i guess this is where your lack of understanding stems from, when you go out do you feel that people might be staring at you or can you just glide along anonymously like any other that is what i mean by normal do you fit in to what the current society demands and guess what i bet you do.



Everyone's a different case. Not every TS is ridiculed, insulted and spat upon daily.

And where did i say they were please keep it factual, on the whole i bet they are one of the more disproportionately discriminated groups in this society and it will be the ones who are passable that probably don't have such a torrid time.



Yea yea, the typical don't judge me talk. Your last sentence, any other sensitive person, would spout nonsense about you judging them as well. I don't care. Not that this has anything to do with anything.

Of course you dont care you probably lack the emotions to do so, that is kind of why your posts are irrelevant

And no i'm not judging you, as if you do lack emotions well then its kind of not your fault

[Birgitta]

The reason I did not kill myself is because I probably was too much of a coward...
that and not wanting to hurt my family
and
you never know...
"What if... death picks up where life left off..."

One of my favorite songlyrics...

DREAD, by Lydia Lunch

dread
that subterranean world
where one awakes from dread to dread
sleep does not put an end to dread
it's as if dread is both day and night
in a mobile disaster
which allows everything to remain twisted
in an endless twilight
perpetual limbo
where every somnambulant second
is plagued by that nightmarish preoccupation
of one's own fears
fears made much too real
this close to the millennium
that final countdown to our own extinction
plundered into a reality from which one will never return
plundered into that shattered dreamscape
of purgatory of paranoia, pestilence, petulance
word becomes increasingly difficult to segregate
good from evil
living from the living dead
bleak panorama where not even death
not even death
offers release
for what you wrought will come back to haunt
and haunt it does
what if death picks up where life left off
what if death picks up where life left off
death picks up where life left off
an endless barrage of unbearable obstacles
a god forsaken terrain
where lost souls find even less mercy
no mercy
and are still forced to reconcile
with what was left undone
as if the struggle never ends
the struggle never ends
as if there is not now or ever peace
peace being foreign to our nature
the nature of the beast

[joeninety]

I dont disagree. Emotional pain can lead to a great deal of physical pain. my point was though, that emotional pain can (somewhat) be treated, through talking to someone, etc, where cancer has no cure yet.

Try telling that to the suicidal who did seek help through therapy and drugs but still went on to kill themselves, i would say that there was obviously no cure for them that is why they did what they did, and that is why it is terminal albeit by there own hand due to a fractured mind.

[Birgitta]

Try telling that to the suicidal who did seek help through therapy and drugs but still went on to kill themselves, i would say that there was obviously no cure for them that is why they did what they did, and that is why it is terminal albeit by there own hand due to a fractured mind.

So many nice open minded and intelligent people on this forum.
In real life I dont bother explaining this stuff anymore...
When someone does not understand I can be glad he/she does not, because
why would you even want to understand such things...
to take one's own life...
Or understand what it can be like to be a transgender for that matter...

I have noticed that intelligent people tend to understand me. I like hanging around with them because there are very little misunderstandings then and I can be at ease with myself. One of the best things someone said to me was: "I understand
that I don't understand" lol

Its not so nice hanging around people that think I made a decision to live my life this way, or that I want to be or become a woman... lol
I sometimes tell them I would have liked to be a well hung straight and charming intelligent tall white heterosexual male lol
But that they could not offer me the transition.... lol

There are so many people judging things they dont understand. I am no saint in that area as well.
The only thing you can do to prevent that is to educate yourself or just be silent when you feel like talking about
something you know little about.


xx
Birgit

[kaiser1one]

Its a psychopaths opinion judging from its coldness and lack of feeling guess that is why suicide would never be an issue for you because it sounds like you emotionally detached at a certain level your just a cold ass wolf survivor and i guess from your true perspective the suicidal are just weak little lambs, well whooppy do for being such a cold soul metaphorically speaking, as i'm sure that you don't believe you have one


Text is cold. That's just how it is.At a certain level, yes, I agree I am emotionally detached. Death however is not one of the detachments.

A survivor? I'm living, not surviving. They're weak if they ended themselves. If they didn't, obviously they've got some strength left. They should use that time to get some help.


Oh looky here, well done on your weak attempt at empathy lol, what can i say apart from well done for knowing people whose lives suck ass where do you want me to pin your medal.

Sorry, not trying to appease any empathy mobs. That was merely a statement.


Shit something i agree with on damn thats not meant to happen, agreed there isn't really a true definition of a normal person per se, but there is a kind of norm you know boy meets girl get 9-5's makes babies and grow old then there are others slightly beyond this say boy meets boy, girl meets girl etc then there is ts which is further beyond the so called norm on the edges of the so called normals spectrum.
let me break it down to you another way trying not to be emotive as from what little i see you do seem to fit the psychopathic definition so i guess this is where your lack of understanding stems from, when you go out do you feel that people might be staring at you or can you just glide along anonymously like any other that is what i mean by normal do you fit in to what the current society demands and guess what i bet you do.

Actually, I do feel people are staring at me. Mainly cause of my skin color though. That's the world for you though.


And where did i say they were please keep it factual, on the whole i bet they are one of the more disproportionately discriminated groups in this society and it will be the ones who are passable that probably don't have such a torrid time.


I never said you did. But you people make it sound like every TS and their mom is.


Of course you dont care you probably lack the emotions to do so, that is kind of why your posts are irrelevant

And no i'm not judging you, as if you do lack emotions well then its kind of not your fault

If I did lack emotions it would be my fault. Cause I'd be the one killing them.


Try telling that to the suicidal who did seek help through therapy and drugs but still went on to kill themselves, i would say that there was obviously no cure for them that is why they did what they did, and that is why it is terminal albeit by there own hand due to a fractured mind.

Maybe they didn't give it enough time and like a druggie in rehab, gave up after a few times.


So many nice open minded and intelligent people on this forum.
In real life I dont bother explaining this stuff anymore...
When someone does not understand I can be glad he does not, because
why would you even want to understand such things...
to take one's own life...
Or understand what it can be like to be a transgender for that matter...

I have noticed that intelligent people tend to understand me. I like hanging around with them because there are very little misunderstandings then and I can be at ease with myself. One of the best things someone said to me was: "I understand
that I don't understand" lol

Its not so nice hanging around people that think I made a decision to live my life this way, or that I want to be or become a woman... lol
I sometimes tell them I would have liked to be a well hung straight and charming intelligent tall white heterosexual male :D lol
But that they could not offer me the transition.... lol

There are so many people judging things they dont understand. I am no saint in that area as well.
The only thing you can do to prevent that is to educate yourself or just be silent when you feel like talking about
something you know little about.

xx
Birgit

Only way to understand is to ask the suicider. But that's obviously not going to happen.

[joeninety]

Its a psychopaths opinion judging from its coldness and lack of feeling guess that is why suicide would never be an issue for you because it sounds like you emotionally detached at a certain level your just a cold ass wolf survivor and i guess from your true perspective the suicidal are just weak little lambs, well whooppy do for being such a cold soul metaphorically speaking, as i'm sure that you don't believe you have one


Text is cold. That's just how it is.At a certain level, yes, I agree I am emotionally detached. Death however is not one of the detachments.

A survivor? I'm living, not surviving. They're weak if they ended themselves. If they didn't, obviously they've got some strength left. They should use that time to get some help.

LOL I NEW WHAT YOU WERE FROM THE MOMENT I SAW YOUR POSTS,WHICH IS COLD HEARTLESS AND RUTHLESS


Oh looky here, well done on your weak attempt at empathy lol, what can i say apart from well done for knowing people whose lives suck ass where do you want me to pin your medal.

Sorry, not trying to appease any empathy mobs. That was merely a statement.

AND I WAS BE IRONIC OR WAS THAT SARCASTIC, TELL YOU WHAT I'LL GET BACK TO YOU ON THAT ONE


Shit something i agree with on damn thats not meant to happen, agreed there isn't really a true definition of a normal person per se, but there is a kind of norm you know boy meets girl get 9-5's makes babies and grow old then there are others slightly beyond this say boy meets boy, girl meets girl etc then there is ts which is further beyond the so called norm on the edges of the so called normals spectrum.
let me break it down to you another way trying not to be emotive as from what little i see you do seem to fit the psychopathic definition so i guess this is where your lack of understanding stems from, when you go out do you feel that people might be staring at you or can you just glide along anonymously like any other that is what i mean by normal do you fit in to what the current society demands and guess what i bet you do.

Actually, I do feel people are staring at me. Mainly cause of my skin color though. That's the world for you though.

THEY ARE PROBABLY STARING AT A BLACKNESS BUT I THINK ITS THE ONE FROM WITHIN RATHER THAN YOUR SURFACE COLOUR, BUT LIKE YOU SAY THATS THE WORLD FOR YOU:)


And where did i say they were please keep it factual, on the whole i bet they are one of the more disproportionately discriminated groups in this society and it will be the ones who are passable that probably don't have such a torrid time.


I never said you did. But you people make it sound like every TS and their mom is.
IS THIS STATEMENT SOME CIRCULAR ARGUMENT SHIT, OH WELL IN THAT CASE REFER TO MY ABOVE POST AGAIN


Of course you dont care you probably lack the emotions to do so, that is kind of why your posts are irrelevant

And no i'm not judging you, as if you do lack emotions well then its kind of not your fault

If I did lack emotions it would be my fault. Cause I'd be the one killing them.
HOW CAN YOU KILL WHAT YOU OBVIOUSLY DON'T HAVE, AGAIN NOT YOUR FAULT OH SHIT THIS IS GOING ROUND THE HOUSES AGAIN GOT TO SOMEHOW STOP I'M FEELING DIZZY MY HEAD IS SPINNING.



Maybe they didn't give it enough time and like a druggie in rehab, gave up after a few times.
AND HOW THE F WOULD YOU KNOW THAT YOU NEED TO STOP WITH THE PRESUMPTIONS AND THE GENERALISING, OH LOOK MORE OF YOUR FLAWS BEING EXPOSED SEEMS YOUR NOT SO GREAT AFTER ALL:party:



Only way to understand is to ask the suicider. But that's obviously not going to happen.
MORE PSYCHOPATHIC BABBLE AND BLAH BLAH BLAH

I reckon i probably need to add bitter and twisted to your profile as well as psychopathic, well i shouldn't wish it but i think i will, my only hope for you is that you get to taste what real despair is like.:loser:

[joeninety]

So many nice open minded and intelligent people on this forum.
In real life I dont bother explaining this stuff anymore...
When someone does not understand I can be glad he/she does not, because
why would you even want to understand such things...
to take one's own life...
Or understand what it can be like to be a transgender for that matter...

I have noticed that intelligent people tend to understand me. I like hanging around with them because there are very little misunderstandings then and I can be at ease with myself. One of the best things someone said to me was: "I understand
that I don't understand" lol

Its not so nice hanging around people that think I made a decision to live my life this way, or that I want to be or become a woman... lol
I sometimes tell them I would have liked to be a well hung straight and charming intelligent tall white heterosexual male lol
But that they could not offer me the transition.... lol

There are so many people judging things they dont understand. I am no saint in that area as well.
The only thing you can do to prevent that is to educate yourself or just be silent when you feel like talking about
something you know little about.


xx
Birgit

Some people are beyond educating, a good point about people not understanding, and why would anyone want to, i haven't experienced that type of bleakness personally, but i have had a few friends depart by there own hands and i have witnessed via a family member and friend the pointlessness feeling of not wanting to go on and through seeing what they go through i can empathise with there situation and can understand why they may wish to go

[Deimos]

"just be silent when you feel like talking about something you know little about."

THANK YOU

I couldn't agree more

[kaiser1one]

MORE PSYCHOPATHIC BABBLE AND BLAH BLAH BLAH

I reckon i probably need to add bitter and twisted to your profile as well as psychopathic, well i shouldn't wish it but i think i will, my only hope for you is that you get to taste what real despair is like.:loser:

Aww you mad? QQ more.:wiggle:

[joeninety]

"just be silent when you feel like talking about something you know little about."

THANK YOU

I couldn't agree more

If your post is aimed at moi let me tell you a little something i never suffered from inner bleakness but i did revel in it as i was usually the one perpetrating it so i know all about how others suffer, somewhere along the lines i saw the true blackness of this universe i had at the time seen the pointlessness of this life (although i was never suicidal), but then from it i have now come to the path that is lit, so don't presume that because i haven't suffered with it that i haven't experienced it, i guess that is why i can recognise a wolf (like the one below) when i see one.

[joeninety]

Aww you mad? QQ more.:wiggle:

Lol what no witty riposte yeah kaiser i'm mad (but not in the way you mean) and so is everyone else they just don't realise it, because like you say what is normal oh shit it doesn't exist arrrggghhh........... :jerkoff

[kaiser1one]

Just so you know, you posted right below your own post. So post wise you refer to yourself.:dancing:

[phobun]

... when incredible people get emotionally exploited and pushed past their limits to the point that they decide to end it all and the assholes that perpetrate the bullshit will probably live forever. Fuck man. FUCK!

FUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~BB~


The good of life is that you get to raise your son into a sensitive and kind man.

[Paulistano]

The good of life is that you get to raise your son into a sensitive and kind man.

Who raised you? Pretty bad job done...:yayo:

[Jackal]

I've been on the brink of suicide before including recently, but if the part of you that's holding back can seek help or find love, any kind including platonic, it keeps you from just ending all the pain through that ultimate method.

[loren]

My gf broke up w/ me and each day is a struggle to not hurt myself.

Those that know me know all the details and i'm not gonna go any further than what i stated previously.

My heart is broken and i lost my future ... so that's all from me.
Take it one day (or if you need, on hour or even one minute) at a time. You can make it through this, I know you're stroonger than that shit.

[loren]

A few months ago, I had a very bad day at work. It was so bad, I thought they were going to fire me. I could here in my mind "worthless, pathetic, nothing, failure" and I felt a darkness wrap around me. Dark thoughts of "end it all and why go on" flooded through my mind. When I got off, I went out to my car and pulled my pistol out. I sat there staring down the barrel. I could actually see myself jacking the slide and putting the barrel against the side of my head and pulling the trigger. I sat there for about ten minutes before I decided that bastard wasn't going to win.

[TJ347]

Maybe - maybe not. That's an oft-repeated mantra that as the years go by just become some words without any true meaning. The statement presumes that continuing to battle yourself is somehow noble and that life is better than death. We don't know that 'being alive' is better - our judgement is necessarily one-sided.

I'm not sure I follow... What the saying "Suicide is the coward's way out" presumes is that no period of rain that falls in our lives is permanent, whereas embracing that which you call the "unknown" is something we cannot undo once we have done it. If there was truly any bravery in it, I shouldn't think suicides would leave notes for their loved ones saying how sorry they are, nor would the loved ones left behind grieve.

[Birgitta]

If your post is aimed at moi let me tell you a little something i never suffered from inner bleakness but i did revel in it as i was usually the one perpetrating it so i know all about how others suffer, somewhere along the lines i saw the true blackness of this universe i had at the time seen the pointlessness of this life (although i was never suicidal), but then from it i have now come to the path that is lit, so don't presume that because i haven't suffered with it that i haven't experienced it, i guess that is why i can recognise a wolf (like the one below) when i see one.

I was not aimed at you xxx

[Birgitta]

I think whenever we make a to-do list, when you always put love on top of that list, you never foget the most important thing in life.

xxxxx
Birgitta

[joeninety]

Just so you know, you posted right below your own post. So post wise you refer to yourself.:dancing:

Lol lame so now we are arguing about semantics, ok i shall be equally lame and say if that was an attempt to score a point well head to the back of the class, also if you can actually read properly then you will note that i am a madman so why should what i do make the slightest bit of sense, hmmmm me things not it will, and with that i bust some more nut over ya head kaiser :jerkoff

Ps sorry if any of my juice drips on you Birgitta lol......................

[joeninety]

I was not aimed at you xxx

Ok i think lol..............

[joeninety]

I think whenever we make a to-do list, when you always put love on top of that list, you never foget the most important thing in life.

xxxxx
Birgitta

That would be the nice and the ideal way and i agree with you now, personally, but being a world of two halves and equals and opposites to some the most important thing on there to do list is Hate, you can even smell the stench in some of these posts no names mentioned:ignore:

[runningdownthatdream]

I'm not sure I follow... What the saying "Suicide is the coward's way out" presumes is that no period of rain that falls in our lives is permanent, whereas embracing that which you call the "unknown" is something we cannot undo once we have done it. If there was truly any bravery in it, I shouldn't think suicides would leave notes for their loved ones saying how sorry they are, nor would the loved ones left behind grieve.

If stepping into the unknown is only for cowards, we would not have left the earth's surface or sailed across its oceans.

Sure sometimes it rains, the clouds clear, and the sun is back. But for some people, they can't ever see the prospect of the sun coming back out - everything appears to be hopeless and no amount of counselling from anyone can change that feeling. If you have never experienced it then you can't relate. When that happened to me I had to seize onto something meaningful to me and not let go of it no matter how dark the days became. Not everyone can do that but that does not make them cowards.

We all have battles, some bigger than others, and some of us don't make it through. Would you call a soldier who lost his life on the battlefield a coward? Or what about a person, who refuses to fight because the idea is abhorrent to them (like Gandhi) - are they cowards too?

[miner]

Hold firm Bella B. You have a sharp mind and a lot to offer. Through this period of adversity you will re-emerge stronger than ever.

Miner

[johnnieev]

Well, for me, being a victim of abuse for a long time (some 20+ years), I can tell you that life REALLY sucked. I used to think why live when it was easier to end things and be done with it all. So many times I would lie awake at night and wonder what is worth living, of how I struck out in life.......

But when I look back and think about seeing the sunrise off Montauk New York and how wonderful it was, seeing the sunset in Perth Australia and thanking my god of letting live one more day, walking among the ruins of Angkor Wat in Cambodia and realize where I am in the world history, enjoying a wonderful meal in Florence Italy after spending the day looking at the glorious art and especially staring at the Statue of David, of being in the Great Basin Park of Nevada and looking up at the greatest light show in the world (the galaxy, of exploring NYC and finding some out-of-the-way stores that have wonderful books and/or albums to read or listen to, watching both niece and nephew catch their first fish on a hook and thinking they won a gold medal in the Olympics, of my wonderful friends who make me feel that I am the greatest person on the planet, and so many other things.......

Well, to me, life can throw you a curve-ball but she is testing me to see how I handle things. And I rather go to the dugout and think about how I can get a base hit next time. Not a home run but just a base hit......

Remember, Babe Ruth may have hit 714 home-runs, but he struck out 1,330 times......

[kaiser1one]

A few months ago, I had a very bad day at work. It was so bad, I thought they were going to fire me. I could here in my mind "worthless, pathetic, nothing, failure" and I felt a darkness wrap around me. Dark thoughts of "end it all and why go on" flooded through my mind. When I got off, I went out to my car and pulled my pistol out. I sat there staring down the barrel. I could actually see myself jacking the slide and putting the barrel against the side of my head and pulling the trigger. I sat there for about ten minutes before I decided that bastard wasn't going to win.

Who the hell is "that bastard"? The gun????? Why kill yourself over a lost job? You can go find another one. It wouldn't be as easy as apply and BAM, but you'd still get it done.


If stepping into the unknown is only for cowards, we would not have left the earth's surface or sailed across its oceans.

Sure sometimes it rains, the clouds clear, and the sun is back. But for some people, they can't ever see the prospect of the sun coming back out - everything appears to be hopeless and no amount of counselling from anyone can change that feeling. If you have never experienced it then you can't relate. When that happened to me I had to seize onto something meaningful to me and not let go of it no matter how dark the days became. Not everyone can do that but that does not make them cowards.

We all have battles, some bigger than others, and some of us don't make it through. Would you call a soldier who lost his life on the battlefield a coward? Or what about a person, who refuses to fight because the idea is abhorrent to them (like Gandhi) - are they cowards too?

Death and going Christopher Columbus exploring the unknown oceans are 2 different things. Us going into space and death are completely different. One's and act of the living and the other's just nothing.

Perhaps those people arent even trying to envision a better tomorrow. Instead they sit in their bubble of doom and gloom. Stereotypical emo kids do this, "You wouldn't understand". Stay depressed without even trying to get help. And when they do get help they sure aren't even trying to embrace it.

A soldier who got shot on the battlefield is not the same as offing yourself.
Neither is a soldier who off's himself because he KNOWS great tortures and horrors are certainly coming his way if caught.

Now kamikaze pilots, they're just fucking idiots not cowards.

Ghandi is also not a coward. In his time, shit was goin down. It took balls to do what he was doing. Which of course got his ass shot.

[phobun]

Who raised you? Pretty bad job done...:yayo:


Wow. You're really wound up. I'm glad to know I have this effect on you.

[phobun]

Remember, Babe Ruth may have hit 714 home-runs, but he struck out 1,330 times......


That's a good point.

[joeninety]

Who the hell is "that bastard"? The gun????? Why kill yourself over a lost job? You can go find another one. It wouldn't be as easy as apply and BAM, but you'd still get it done.



Death and going Christopher Columbus exploring the unknown oceans are 2 different things. Us going into space and death are completely different. One's and act of the living and the other's just nothing.

Perhaps those people arent even trying to envision a better tomorrow. Instead they sit in their bubble of doom and gloom. Stereotypical emo kids do this, "You wouldn't understand". Stay depressed without even trying to get help. And when they do get help they sure aren't even trying to embrace it.

A soldier who got shot on the battlefield is not the same as offing yourself.
Neither is a soldier who off's himself because he KNOWS great tortures and horrors are certainly coming his way if caught.

Now kamikaze pilots, they're just fucking idiots not cowards.

Ghandi is also not a coward. In his time, shit was goin down. It took balls to do what he was doing. Which of course got his ass shot.


aaahhhhh yaaaawwwwn still going on with your boring rhetoric of the oh so weak, yawn look puppet:wiggle: we get that your a bitter twisted wreck whose full of hate and who really isn't as great as he thinks he is (guess that is why you're in here looking for easy pickings), so come on puppet:wiggle: change the channel n liven up, and with a tug of the strings the puppet:fu:........................

[loren]

Who the hell is "that bastard"? The gun????? Why kill yourself over a lost job? You can go find another one. It wouldn't be as easy as apply and BAM, but you'd still get it done.When I was younger there was a guy (a wolf in sheep's clothing) who would all the time tell me that I was worthless and wouldn't amount to anything. He was physically and psycologically abusive. I had like zero self-esteem and was suicidal.

As for the specific incident I mentioned, I was going through a lot and was feeling overwhelmed at the time.

[joeninety]

When I was younger there was a guy (a wolf in sheep's clothing) who would all the time tell me that I was worthless and wouldn't amount to anything. He was physically and psycologically abusive. I had like zero self-esteem and was suicidal.

As for the specific incident I mentioned, I was going through a lot and was feeling overwhelmed at the time.


Pay kaiser no mind for he is an irrelevant little puppet who needs to be abusive to compensate for the fact that he is a weak little man...............

[scroller]

A few months ago, I had a very bad day at work. It was so bad, I thought they were going to fire me. I could here in my mind "worthless, pathetic, nothing, failure" and I felt a darkness wrap around me. Dark thoughts of "end it all and why go on" flooded through my mind. When I got off, I went out to my car and pulled my pistol out. I sat there staring down the barrel. I could actually see myself jacking the slide and putting the barrel against the side of my head and pulling the trigger. I sat there for about ten minutes before I decided that bastard wasn't going to win.

Recommend that you not keep the gun. I've had a similar scene when I was much, much younger. I've had some days since where I'm glad I don't have one. You might have a day with a chemical imbalance that you're not in control... outsmart it and ditch the gun in advance. IMO.

[yodajazz]

A few months ago, I had a very bad day at work. It was so bad, I thought they were going to fire me. I could here in my mind "worthless, pathetic, nothing, failure" and I felt a darkness wrap around me. Dark thoughts of "end it all and why go on" flooded through my mind. When I got off, I went out to my car and pulled my pistol out. I sat there staring down the barrel. I could actually see myself jacking the slide and putting the barrel against the side of my head and pulling the trigger. I sat there for about ten minutes before I decided that bastard wasn't going to win.
I think you were very right, in deciding to live and not letting someone else determine your value. I want to add that it helps when we learn about the lives of others, in how they overcame hardships. These stories are found all over. But I want also to point out that there are stories like that in the Bible. My favorite is the story of Joseph, to rose up after being sold into slavery by his brothers, and a second time, after being jailed for a crime he did not commit. And he ended up helping the very brothers who did him worng. Things like this, are the real value of religion. Those who follow, should have a greater sense of self worth, as they see themselves as part of a greater whole. I happen to also believe that the struggles of transexual people today, will be an important part of the story of human identity, in the coming centuries. Sometimes people wonder why they are here, especially transexuals. I think the simplest way to put is to say, we are here to teach people a way to greater love, beyond reproduction, beyond the physical limitations of our birth bodies and physical developments. It's more about the human being, than the human body. Understand that we all are important parts of the whole. Without drops of water, there would be no power of an ocean.

[TJ347]

Death and going Christopher Columbus exploring the unknown oceans are 2 different things. Us going into space and death are completely different. One's and act of the living and the other's just nothing.

A soldier who got shot on the battlefield is not the same as offing yourself.

That this even has to be explained to someone old enough to be on this forum in the first place is enough to make me wonder if it's worth going on. As a member of this forum, that is.

[joeninety]

I think you were very right, in deciding to live and not letting someone else determine your value. I want to add that it helps when we learn about the lives of others, in how they overcame hardships. These stories are found all over. But I want also to point out that there are stories like that in the Bible. My favorite is the story of Joseph, to rose up after being sold into slavery by his brothers, and a second time, after being jailed for a crime he did not commit. And he ended up helping the very brothers who did him worng. Things like this, are the real value of religion. Those who follow, should have a greater sense of self worth, as they see themselves as part of a greater whole. I happen to also believe that the struggles of transexual people today, will be an important part of the story of human identity, in the coming centuries. Sometimes people wonder why they are here, especially transexuals. I think the simplest way to put is to say, we are here to teach people a way to greater love, beyond reproduction, beyond the physical limitations of our birth bodies and physical developments. It's more about the human being, than the human body. Understand that we all are important parts of the whole. Without drops of water, there would be no power of an ocean.


Nice post i like how you put across the wider picture i.e the whole being greater than the sum of its parts......................

[lisaparadise]

[QUOTE=yodajazz;919816. But I want also to point out that there are stories like that in the Bible. My favorite is the story of Joseph, to rose up after being sold into slavery by his brothers, and a second time, after being jailed for a crime he did not commit. And he ended up helping the very brothers who did him worng. .[/QUOTE] and this is the same god that brutaly murdered his own child?you people are so fucking pathetic,instead of believing in myths just live your life trusting what you see and not what youve heard or read in a bible and youll be ok.

[joeninety]

and this is the same god that brutaly murdered his own child?you people are so fucking pathetic,instead of believing in myths just live your life trusting what you see and not what youve heard or read in a bible and youll be ok.

Me thinks me smells an aethist of sorts lol it wasn't God that supposedly killed his child it was supposedly the Romans, and who are you to say who is pathetic if he takes comfort from his beliefs and causes no harm in doing so i fail to see what your issue is.

And as for trusting what you see well are you really sure you can or that you do, or do your assumptions and conditioning get in the way of that plus any other number of trickery.

http://www.whitedovebooks.co.uk/nlp/perception.htm

http://mindfulhack.blogspot.com/2008/08/psychology-what-we-see-is-as-much.html

http://realityshifters.com/pages/articles/payattention.html,

really i think what you meant to say is ignorance is bliss...............

[CaliBoy951]

Umm, I don't want to sound heartless, but I have learned that the tough times often define us as who we are. I agree that many times it is the "good people" that have terrible things happen to them and the bad people seem to have so good.

As we start to get older we learn to think more things through, and I do believe that time really does heal almost anything.

[Nivek]

Make each second count, and remind others that our time here is precious, not promised.

[phobun]

and this is the same god that brutaly murdered his own child?you people are so fucking pathetic,instead of believing in myths just live your life trusting what you see and not what youve heard or read in a bible and youll be ok.


well said

[kaiser1one]

Me thinks me smells an aethist of sorts lol it wasn't God that supposedly killed his child it was supposedly the Romans, and who are you to say who is pathetic if he takes comfort from his beliefs and causes no harm in doing so i fail to see what your issue is.

And as for trusting what you see well are you really sure you can or that you do, or do your assumptions and conditioning get in the way of that plus any other number of trickery.

http://www.whitedovebooks.co.uk/nlp/perception.htm

http://mindfulhack.blogspot.com/2008/08/psychology-what-we-see-is-as-much.html

http://realityshifters.com/pages/articles/payattention.html,

really i think what you meant to say is ignorance is bliss...............

Well since we're supposedly made in God's image, technically us spawn off's of God, aka his children, killed his son, which was actually him in flesh form and then Jesus became a zombie.

Besides, it's pretty obvious the Christian god is wishy washy on matters.

[joeninety]

Well since we're supposedly made in God's image, technically us spawn off's of God, aka his children, killed his son, which was actually him in flesh form and then Jesus became a zombie.

Besides, it's pretty obvious the Christian god is wishy washy on matters.

Ahhhh there you are my naughty puppet right on cue as predictable as ever i'm going to pull another of your strings and say this, lets say we cloned you right the clone is you as in it shares all your dna and traits but lets say your clone goes on to murder rape and pillage is that (A) Your fault as he is your likeness(B) Does that make you guilty by association even though you have never commited a crime in your life, in fact you have only ever done good with it.

Go figure puppet and get back to me with the answer to that conundrum, failure to do so will only again highlight your inferiority and why you are a puppet.........................

[LibertyHarkness]

i love life myself

[joeninety]

i love life myself


I love pulling the strings on my kaiser1 puppet :wiggle:

[kaiser1one]

Ahhhh there you are my naughty puppet right on cue as predictable as ever i'm going to pull another of your strings and say this, lets say we cloned you right the clone is you as in it shares all your dna and traits but lets say your clone goes on to murder rape and pillage is that (A) Your fault as he is your likeness(B) Does that make you guilty by association even though you have never commited a crime in your life, in fact you have only ever done good with it.

Go figure puppet and get back to me with the answer to that conundrum, failure to do so will only again highlight your inferiority and why you are a puppet.........................

On cue? Please,as if you could predict when I'd post.

I'm human, not an omnipotent being. Since that is the case, a clone of me that commited a crime would be separate from me. Of course this is assuming they have not caught the clone. Plus there would be physical distinctions that separate our looks.

Besides, the Christian god creating spawn offs that are just like him is its own fault.

By the by, your last sentence, you call me a puppet if I respond, yet you call me a puppet if I don't respond.:screwy

[joeninety]

On cue? Please,as if you could predict when I'd post.
Lol course i can 4 i am G O D don't you know


I'm human, not an omnipotent being.AND THE DISTINCTION IS WHAT

Since that is the case, a clone of me that commited a crime would be separate from me. SO WHY IS IT DIFFERENT FOR GOD SEE ABOVE

Of course this is assuming they have not caught the clone.ELABOATE BECAUSE I FAIL TO SEE YOUR POINT

Plus there would be physical distinctions that separate our looks.ERM ARE YOU SURE YOU KNOW WHAT A CLONE IS BECAUSE THAT LAST STATEMENT IS PREPOSTEROUS

Besides, the Christian god creating spawn offs that are just like him is its own fault. LAST I CHECKED THE SUPPOSED GOD GAVE HIS SUPPOSED OFFSPRING FREE WILL HMMMM MAYBE THAT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH ALL THE TROUBLES MAN (NOT GOD) CAUSES, NOT THAT I TOTALLY BELIEVE IN RELIGION OR ANYTHING

By the by, your last sentence, you call me a puppet if I respond, yet you call me a puppet if I don't respond.:screwy
NO SHIT SHERLOCK HAVEN'T YOU FIGURED IT OUT YET, OK HERE IS A CLUE YOUR'E DAMNED IF YOU DO AND DAMNED IF YOU DON'T SO GO FIGURE meine wenig puppet on a string..........:yingyang:

[kaiser1one]

It's different for a god because they're supposed to be OMG perfect.

If they caught the clone, then thre would be no blaming me, despite my looking the same.

The clone can be 100% like me, however scars and such could easily distinguish us. Hell a haircut could make it so we're different.

If the Christian god were as good as they say, the world would not be like it is now. When it comes to Christianity, you have no true free will.

Aww y so serious? QQ more.

[joeninety]

It's different for a god because they're supposed to be OMG perfect.
Yeah yeah get that, but where does it say that his duplicants have to be, if i remember correctly didn't Adam and his misses fail a test????????

If they caught the clone, then thre would be no blaming me, despite my looking the same.

The clone can be 100% like me, however scars and such could easily distinguish us. Hell a haircut could make it so we're different.
Somewhere in your hypothetical world you forgot to mention the issue of what happens if you look identical, if there is nothing to distinguish you from your clone, remember Kaiser we are talking clones not twins, but you missed the un-obvious analogy (although i thought it was plain to see) as this was not the point i was making, come kaiser you're going on like what i said is abstruse

If the Christian god were as good as they say, the world would not be like it is now. When it comes to Christianity, you have no true free will.
Kaiser use distinction when making such statements and stop making sweeping generalisations, fundamentlist Christians are a problem, joe average Christian not so much so and yet again you miss the point (or you know you can't really argue against)
Let me spell it out loud and clear as you seem a little on the slow side......
THE SUPPOSED GOD CREATED, THEN HE LEFT IT TO MAN TO DO AS THEY WILL, AS SUPPOSED PARADISE WAS NOW TO ELUDE THEM DUE TO ADAM AND EVE GIVING INTO TEMPTATION, SO HELL ON EARTH ISN'T GOD IT IS THE REMINDER OF WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU LISTEN TO THE WHISPERINGS OF THE SNAKE.

Aww y so serious? QQ more.
And no kaiser i am not angry nor serious when i write these posts most of the time i'm actually laughing at baiting you such a predictable puppet lol so wrong again, go put ya dunce hat on:party:

[BellaBellucci]

Both of you: stop bloviating or I'll turn this thread around and take us all back home. Geez! :ignore:

~BB~

[joeninety]

Sorry mum but it is oh so funny to wind the little toy up, i struggle to contain myself every time the little puppet posts but i shall try harder mummy i promise....................

[LibertyHarkness]

on a lighter note dont suppose anyone fancies giving me a blowjob tonight?

[BellaBellucci]

on a lighter note dont suppose anyone fancies giving me a blowjob tonight?

Sure. I'll fly right out. You have to promise to pull my hair tho. :lol:

~BB~

[LibertyHarkness]

bella i will pull your hair, spit in your mouth and make you gag :) if you like to play abit naughty and rough :)

[BellaBellucci]

bella i will pull your hair, spit in your mouth and make you gag :) if you like to play abit naughty and rough :)

I love being gagged. But the spitting in the mouth thing? Eww. Go ahead and try it if you want to clean up my vomit. :lol:

~BB~

[LibertyHarkness]

thats ok abit of vomit never hurt anyone .. lol

[BellaBellucci]

thats ok abit of vomit never hurt anyone .. lol

Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!

~BB~

[LibertyHarkness]

aww bella i loves you xxx how about you suck me off abit and then open up your arse like a tin of beans with my johnson :) xx

[BellaBellucci]

aww bella i loves you xxx how about you suck me off abit and then open up your arse like a tin of beans with my johnson :) xx

I think I'd bend over for ya! :fuckin: ;)

Quick question tho: when did you start talking like Dino? :lol:

~BB~

[LibertyHarkness]

haha let me rephrase that .. you mean when did Dino start talking like me :) there can only be one.... i am the original Titan here :)

[BellaBellucci]

haha let me rephrase that .. you mean when did Dino start talking like me :) there can only be one.... i am the original Titan here :)

Dems be fighting words, Ms. MacLeod. Take it up with Dino. :whistle:

~BB~

[kaiser1one]

Eh I was done talking to the baby anyway. Teleporting out now. Cya.

[joeninety]

pmsl yeah laters negative nigel ps you'll have to show us how to do that teleporting thingy lmao ah ha ah ha ah ha.................................

[robertlouis]

on a lighter note dont suppose anyone fancies giving me a blowjob tonight?

That's the best laugh I've had in years. Brilliant, Libby. :Bowdown::Bowdown:

The keyboard's awash with tea - only rock'n'roll here, kids.

[loren]

on a lighter note dont suppose anyone fancies giving me a blowjob tonight?
I'd love to, only if you fuck my asstoo.;):fuckin:

[yodajazz]

and this is the same god that brutaly murdered his own child?you people are so fucking pathetic,instead of believing in myths just live your life trusting what you see and not what youve heard or read in a bible and youll be ok.

Even myths last, because they teach us lessons, or examples about life and humanity. For those that see with love, can even learn from an infant, let alone writings that show that some human behavior has not changed for thousands of years. Though Jesus, was hailed by crowds, a week later, crowds chose someone else to be spared from execution. Even performing miracles could not guaruntee sustained popularity. So our favorite performer is voted off American Idol. It's the same as Jesus, in the sense, that popularity is not the final measure of worth.

But another lesson is to not to just trust in only what you see. We see the devastation of an earthquake. But there were two earthquakes close together; one in Chile, the other in Haiti. Chile had much less damage and causualties, because they had learned lessons from previous quakes, whereas, there was less knowledge and preparation in Haiti. So there was good that came from the previous quakes, in Chile. Things that appear to be bad are often, good in disguise, and also the opposite. We can get wisdom from many sources, but the Bible is a great source, if it is used to learn about life, and love, and not used to condemn others.

Thanks for repsonding to my post.

[joeninety]

You speak sense and humble with it too, nice posts full of wisdom........................

[traLika]

nice posts full of wisdom........................


I'd say well meaning but somewhat misguided posts but there ya go...

[joeninety]

I'd say well meaning but somewhat misguided posts but there ya go...

If you ignore the religious connotations (for those on here that obviously aren't) and read his posts minus them, then you may find that they are actually good, i fail to see what is that misguided about them, if more of us adopted this guys mellow and humble attitude then surely there would be a lot less strife in the world.................

[traLika]

If you ignore the religious connotations (for those on here that obviously aren't) and read his posts minus them, then you may find that they are actually good, i fail to see what is that misguided about them, if more of us adopted this guys mellow and humble attitude then surely there would be a lot less strife in the world.................

I'm not saying everything the guy says is rubbish. Quite the contrary.

But a religious guy will rarely get any point across to an athiest if he begins by talking about Jesus...

[kaiser1one]

Teleports in*

You don't need a bible to teach you that stuff. Learn it from your parents and family.

[LibertyHarkness]

people need to lighten up on this forum .. everyime a serious thread is started people kick off at each other over not seeing eye to eye..

why cant you all just face the reality ... opionons are like arsholes and you have one of thise right :)

now anyway moving on ... yes i need a blowjob and yes i will fuck your arsehole if your a good boy :)

[joeninety]

people need to lighten up on this forum .. everyime a serious thread is started people kick off at each other over not seeing eye to eye..

why cant you all just face the reality ... opionons are like arsholes and you have one of thise right :)

now anyway moving on ... yes i need a blowjob and yes i will fuck your arsehole if your a good boy :)

I'm a good boy please let me blow you:praying:

[iamdrgonzo]

yes i need a blowjob and yes i will fuck your arsehole if your a good boy :)

What if I'm a bad boy? :whistle: