Favorite quotes....

[AllanahStarrNYC]

Some of mine are-

"I'm not offended by the dumb blonde jokes, cause I know I am not dumb and I know I am not blonde"- Dolly Parton

"Why am I so good at playing bitches? I think it's because I'm not a bitch. Maybe that's why Miss Crawford always plays ladies"-Bette Davis

"If you want the girl next door then GO, next door"-Diana Vreeland

"My weaknesses have always been food and men - in that order"-Dolly Parton

Anyone have any faves they care to share?

[Ecstatic]

He who binds to himself a joy
Does the winged life destroy
But he who kisses a joy as it flies
Lives in Eternity's sunrise.

- William Blake

[JohnnyWalkerBlackLabel]

"Cry 'Havoc', and let slip the dogs of war, that this foul deed shall smell above the earth with carrion men, groaning for burial"
William Shakespeare

[GroobySteven]

"FECK!"
Father Jack Hackerty

[chefmike]

from the good Dr. Thompson.... aka Uncle Duke...


http://www.chiefbloggingofficer.com/images/thmpson-never-weird-enough.jpg

[Dkg]

*looks at his own sig*

[chefmike]

Mae West...

Too much of a good thing is wonderful

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before

You're never too old to become younger

I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it

He who hesitates is a damned fool

Marriage is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet



http://www.chiefbloggingofficer.com/images/thmpson-never-weird-enough.jpg

[ezed]

Is that a pickle in your pocket or are you just happy to see me...Mae West

Oh, I love sitting on your lap. I could sit here all day if you didn't stand up...Groucho Marx

[chefmike]

Oscar Wilde...

Work is the scourge of the drinking classes

Vile deeds like poison weeds bloom well in prison air, it is only the good in man, that wastes and withers there

A man can be happy with any woman as long as he does not love her

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination

America had often been discoverd before Columbus, but it had always been hushed up

http://www.chiefbloggingofficer.com/images/thmpson-never-weird-enough.jpg

[brickcitybrother]

Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan 'Press On' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.

Calvin Coolidge (1872 - 1933)

[LG]

Some funny favourites:

When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities.
Matt Groening

But the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.
Carl Sagan

Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.
George Burns

France is a country where the money falls apart in your hands and you can't tear the toilet paper.
Billy Wilder

And some serious ones:

Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope, and crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring those ripples build a current which can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance.
Robert Kennedy

Anyone who trades liberty for security deserves neither liberty nor security.
Benjamin Franklin

and of course my current sig:

Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired, signifies in the final sense a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed.
Dwight D. Eisenhower

Finally...

Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
Ambrose Bierce (The Devil's Dictionary)

People will accept your ideas much more readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin said it first.
David H. Comins

[Dina Delicious]

"stop worrrying if your vision is new let others make that decision they usually do you keep moving on"
Stephen Sondheim

"A mans reach must exceed his grasp"--Not sure

"If you settle for what you have you deserve what you get"----grandma told me this one not sure where it came from

"todays trick is tommorows tranny"
lol thats old school

[scipio]

Necessity is the plea for every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.
---- William Pitt, 1783

Those who would give up Essential Liberty to purchase a little Temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety
-- Benjamin Franklin

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes

The shortest distance between you and me is love.

[Overlord Abomination]

"Doctors are men who prescribe medicines of which they know little, to cure diseases of which they know less, in human beings of which they know nothing...." ---Voltaire

[wukinpunub68]

Just say No.
Nancy Reagan

[Canucklehead]

Here are a few from the parton saint of the Handy Man, Mr. Red Green:

"If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy"

"Keep your stick on the ice"

"Share and Share alike, but not my stuff"

"It is easier to beg forgiveness than ask permission"

On a serious note, William Wrigley Jr. once said: "Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm"

[Ecstatic]

"You can't steal second with your foot on first." - Les Sampou in her song "Alibis", attrtibuted to her father

"The movement you need is on your shoulder." - Paul McCartney

"There's no success like failure, and failure's no success at all." - Bob Dylan

"The strongest thing a man can do, sir, is still refuse to hate." - Robin Williamson

Definition of an optimistic realist: the glass is half full, but too far away to reach. - Me

[LAtoNY]

"I think what Jefferson was trying to say is, 'This England place is bogus and if we dont get some cool rules ourselves -- PRONTO, then we'll just be bogus too!"

[LAtoNY]

"Wasn't lookin too good but I was feelin real well."

- Keith Richards

[Quinn]

I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: "O Lord make my enemies ridiculous." And God granted it.
-Voltaire

The world is divided into two classes, those who believe the incredible, and those who do the improbable.
-Oscar Wilde

Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.
-Mahatma Gandhi

A man who is "of sound mind" is one who keeps the inner madman under lock and key.
-Paul Valéry

I feel like a fugitive from the law of averages.
-William H. Mauldin

Also, a poem from my favorite deep thinking poet, Ted Hughes.

Crow's Theology

Crow realized God loved him-
Otherwise, he would have dropped dead.
So that was proved.
Crow reclined, marveling, on his heartbeat.

And he realized that God spoke Crow-
Just existing was His revelation.

But what Loved the stones and spoke stone?
They seemed to exist too.
And what spoke that strange silence
After his clamor of caws faded?

And what loved the shot-pellets
That dribbled from those strung-up mummifying crows?
What spoke the silence of lead?

Crow realized there were two Gods-

One of them much bigger than the other
Loving his enemies
And having all the weapons.

-Quinn

[blckhaze]

*look at sig*

[wayfuctup]

"a friend with weed is a friend indeed"

Me

[Ecstatic]

Quinn, thanks for posting the Ted Hughes poem. Whatever one might think of Hughes and Sylvia Plath, he was a great poet.

[Quinn]

Quinn, thanks for posting the Ted Hughes poem. Whatever one might think of Hughes and Sylvia Plath, he was a great poet.

While he was a dark and controversial figure, his pinnacle work (Crow 1970) represents one of the greatest poetic works in the last fifty years. When I first read many of the works contained therein, I had to take about twenty minutes to reflect upon each one in order to fully consider its meaning. Here's two more:

Crow's Nerve Fails

Crow, feeling his brain slip,
Finds his every feather the fossil of a murder.

Who murdered all these?
These living dead, that root in his nerves and his blood
Till he is visibly black?

How can he fly from his feathers?
And why have they homed on him?

Is he the archive of their accusations?
Or their ghostly purpose, their pining vengeance?
Or their unforgiven prisoner?

He cannot be forgiven.

His prison is the earth. Clothed in his conviction,
Trying to remember his crimes

Heavily he flies.

Crow's Fall

When Crow was white he decided the sun was too white.
He decided it glared much too whitely.
He decided to attack it and defeat it.

He got his strength flush and in full glitter.
He clawed and fluffed his rage up.
He aimed his beak direct at the sun's centre.

He laughed himself to the centre of himself

And attacked.

At his battle cry trees grew suddenly old,
Shadows flattened.

But the sun brightened-
It brightened, and Crow returned charred black.

He opened his mouth but what came out was charred black.

"Up there," he managed,
"Where white is black and black is white, I won."

-Quinn

[Slither]

"Ah, yes, divorce..., from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man's genitals through his wallet" - Robin Williams

"I read somewhere that 77 per cent of all the mentally ill live in poverty. Actually, I'm more intrigued by the 23 per cent who are apparently doing quite well for themselves." - Jerry Garcia

"The only thing that comes to a sleeping man is dreams." - Tupac Shakur

"Jon Bon Jovi can suck my fucking dick" - Axl Rose

[Dina Delicious]

"I dropped out of High school but i didnt drop out of life"---August Wilson playwright

[chefmike]

Bend over and touch your toes,

and I'll show you where the wild goose goes!!


Ernest T. Bass, poet-at-large...Mayberry. N.C.


http://www.chiefbloggingofficer.com/images/thmpson-never-weird-enough.jpg

[AllanahStarrNYC]

"Darling, don't get even, get EVERYTHING."- Ivana Trump

[Harrys Boy]

This is not the end, it is not even the begining of the end, but it is perhaps the end of the begining.

Winston Churchill after North Africa

[Jack59]

Samuel Clemens
aka Mark Twain... no relation to Roger or Shania


Suppose you were a member of Congress and suppose you were an idiot. But I repeat myself.

A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on it's shoes.

Barring that natural expression of villainy which we all have, the man looked honest enough.

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities. Truth isn't.

I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.

In the first place, God made idiots. That was for practice. Then he made school boards.

The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out the conservative adopts them.

[Ecstatic]

Thanks again, Quinn. You've inspired me to pull my Hughes off its dusty shelf! I've always particularly liked Crow's Fall. Kind of a nastier Coyote, isn't he?

[chefmike]

W.C. Fields...

I never voted for anyone. I always voted against.

Marriage is better than leprosy because it's easier to get rid of.

I am free of all prejudice, I hate everyone equally.

Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.


http://www.chiefbloggingofficer.com/images/thmpson-never-weird-enough.jpg

[Canucklehead]

If dolphins are so smart, how come they still live in igloos. -Eric Cartman

[ezed]

"WHEN WILL THIS DAY FUCKING END!" a fellow employee in Libya back in the seventies, arising at 7:00 am after a night of drinking heavily.

[Jason]

It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it
happens. -Woody Allen

Life is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to
get" - Forrest Gump

"To fall in love is awfully simple, to fall out of love is simply
awful

"work hard and play hard"

[flabbybody]

Democracy is the worst form of government,
except for all the others.

Sir Winston Churchill

[Mugai_hentaisha]

some of mine:

"Pray to your God(s) but never rely on them"- Musashi

"In the beginning I said, "Here hold my beer and watch this shit!" - me

more to follow when I have had more sleep.lol

Oh yeah my sig. almost forgot that one. :lol:

[Shandus]

My personal favorite:
While your capacity for success is finite, your capacity for failure is infinite.

Also:

I'm disinclined to acquiesce to your request. Means "no".

[tsntx]

boys have a penis, and girls have vaginas... but not always

[Spiderman]

Sheila & Ash "You found me beautiful once." "Honey, you got real ugly."

Ash "Keep your damn filthy bones out of my mouth."

[chefmike]

Kinky's hilarious...how about him runnin for guv of texas?...he always cracks me up when he's on Imus...

they don't make jews like jesus anymore...Kinky Friedman

http://usera.imagecave.com/chefmike/thmpson-never-weird-enough.jpg

[Alchemist]

If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine - Obi Wan Kenobi, Star Wars

Yea thats right, i'm a SW geek.

[BigTime]

Yea thats right, i'm a SW geek.

"The circle is now complete. When I left you, I was but the learner; now I am the master."
"I find your lack of faith disturbing."
Vader:

Politician and diapers should be changed frequently, for the same reason.
Anonymous

Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens.
Jimi Hendrix

Man is the only creature who refuses to be what he is.
Albert Camus

[ghostofbillhicks]

'There's more to life than books, you know ... but not much more'

'Interviewer: What lyrics would you put in if you re-recorded 'Reasons To Be Cheerful?'
Answer: It would probably be an instrumental.'

- Morrissey

[midpier]

"I told you the phone in my limo was busted I couldn't get in touch with my bitches"
Eddie Murphy- Trading Places

[SexxxyJade]

I SALE CONDOMS, WITH "FREE" DEMONSTRATIONS!!!!!! :P

[Hara_Juku Tgirl]

Some of mine are-

"I'm not offended by the dumb blonde jokes, cause I know I am not dumb and I know I am not blonde"- Dolly Parton

"Why am I so good at playing bitches? I think it's because I'm not a bitch. Maybe that's why Miss Crawford always plays ladies"-Bette Davis

"If you want the girl next door then GO, next door"-Diana Vreeland

"My weaknesses have always been food and men - in that order"-Dolly Parton

Anyone have any faves they care to share?

Some of mines are:

"I eat men for breakfast." - Joan Collins

"Being a sex symbol has to do with an attitude, not looks. Most men think it’s looks, most women know otherwise." - Kathleen Turner

"Be nice to people on your way up because you'll meet them on your way down." - Wilson Mizner

"Have no fear of perfection- you'll never reach it." - Salvador Dali

"The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age." - Lucille Ball

~Kisses.

HTG