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  1. #1
    Senior Member 5 Star Poster
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    Default Serious Question, Your Thoughts Appreciated

    I'd appreciate your honest opinions, that's part of why I signed up and why I'm posting this now. First an explanation by way of introduction. (This is gonna be long and, most likely, a bit self-indulgent. Forgive me, I'm trying to work through something here and need a sounding board.)

    I have always been promiscuous- what guy isn't?- and my sexual preferences have always been a bit wild. My first (non-solo) experience was a girl blowing me at a Van Halen concert, sitting next to our friends.

    In Jr. High/ HS I preferred sex on top of parking garages or behind convenience stores to parking at the end of a deserted road or banging it out in an empty house. I've let friends watch me in flagrante delicto, solo or in congress.

    I love sex, but lately it doesn't have the impact I desire. Maybe it's like anhedonia- too much of everything and now it takes dynamite to get me up. (In case you recognize the fragments in that last sentence I might as well admit to following the Dead for awhile, too, with all the excess that implies, though that was a lifetime ago, when I thought there might be a shortcut to where I wanted to be. I'm an adrenaline junkie, absolutely, but that is the only junk I'm on.)

    I am also a firm believer in being true to one's self. Not sure what I think about a capital g god, but if there is a creator then we must have the spark of the divine- it may express itself differently in each of us but it would have to in order to encompass the whole of creation. You have to love people who are willing to nourish that spark to whatever flame it becomes. Some burn brightly.

    I love the wonder of others. Though one could argue that anyone who isn't you is "The Other", I seek out the ones who seem strongest in their "Otherness" because they seem most like me. Not that I am doing or have done anything as significant as the girls here, but in my way and within my realm I'm pretty out there.

    You girls are driving me crazy right now, and I can't tell without acting on it if it's more thrill seeking behavior or a deep appreciation for who you are, as well as recognition and validation of self.

    I've gone to a couple of the clubs and been knocked out. It's more fun to watch you dance than the ladies at strip clubs, but it isn't just the girls on stage. Maybe the self-confidence you need to take the steps you've taken leads to the brazen way you move through the rest of us. So focused, so detailed in the way you present yourselves, but graceful instead of forced. Soooo feminine and sexy. It's the femininity that stirs my beast- I have always been with women and can't imagine glitter on some guy's hairy chest or believe any guy could tuck his hair behind his ear to the same effect that Amy achieves. (Just an example- though I do think she is specifically awesome!)

    I'm thinking partly about how we identify ourselves, and the more I consider it for myself the hazier my understanding becomes. Gorgeous is gorgeous, sexy is sexy, love is love. It's as much emotional and psychological as it is physical. You make a connection with someone and labels fall by the wayside, pushed away by the breadth of the relationship.

    I'm willing to bet there's nothing new here to you, but I don't have an answer. Frankly, reading this over for errors and falsities, I'm not even sure if these are the right questions: do you think it's curiosity, boredom, appreciation, anything or nothing at all? Could there be something to it, or should I try to fit myself into the "normal" mold? Am I wasting time and bandwidth?

    Thanks for listening.



  2. #2
    mmmmm beefy Platinum Poster rockabilly's Avatar
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    Default Re: Serious Question, Your Thoughts Appreciated

    Van Halen "Roth"
    or
    Van Halen "Hagar"



  3. #3
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    Default Re: Serious Question, Your Thoughts Appreciated

    'tis the evolution of your own sexuality!



  4. #4
    5 Star Poster dderek123's Avatar
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    Default Re: Serious Question, Your Thoughts Appreciated

    U tink 2 mut



  5. #5
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    Default Re: Serious Question, Your Thoughts Appreciated

    Rockabilly, it was post Roth but I didn't mind, Alex never changed!

    Dderick123, you are right and I am working on that. Sometimes helpful but on the harder stuff it crushes action.

    And Sheer1, right as well- but that is the confusing part.

    I know chances are that illumination will be my own to give, but can anyone else shed a little light on the subject?



  6. #6
    mmmmm beefy Platinum Poster rockabilly's Avatar
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    Default Re: Serious Question, Your Thoughts Appreciated

    It's a catch 22 bro , what's "normal" for you may not be "normal" for someone else.

    Be true to who you are and do what makes you happy. You can't live your life for anyone else but you , and trying to please others expectations is a no win situation.



  7. #7
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    Default Re: Serious Question, Your Thoughts Appreciated

    l will weigh in on this topic.

    Some of us are here because we are in search of that next thing that will intrigue us and excite us sexually. I like a great many of the peeps here as people but I like the heightened sexually charged nature of this environment as well. I have been able to have some pretty cool experiences here.

    Most of the babes I have hung out with are not as freaky as I am but some are. Nevertheless whether having lunch or playing miniature golf or watching a movie I always have a great time with whomever I am hanging with. But that being said, I still am always in search of the next experience. Am I addicted? Who gives a fuck as I am having fun and I try not to analyze too much and I sure as hell try not to label anyone, especially myself.

    I never followed the Dead but did see them a couple of times.

    I would love to have a babe who likes to go to garage sales and camping and who would like to fuck in risky places and do a few guys at once. I have gotten close a couple of times but I won't hold my breath waiting or be upset if I don't have that right now. The next wild time is right around the corner.


    I've neverdone good things
    I've never done bad things
    I've never done anything out of the blue

  8. #8
    Senior Member 5 Star Poster
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    Default Re: Serious Question, Your Thoughts Appreciated

    Thanks for your thoughts, Ed, and for the encouragement, Rockabilly.



  9. #9
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    Default Re: Serious Question, Your Thoughts Appreciated

    I wasted 3 minutes of my life and want them back.



  10. #10
    Senior Member 5 Star Poster
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    Default Re: Serious Question, Your Thoughts Appreciated

    I gave you the "greasy kid stuff" disclaimer. Sorry if there's nothing there that interests you.



    I don't think that kindness is a weakness; I don't have a problem with compassion. Tell me what you're thinking. . .". Reef, "Consideration". 1996



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