How do I meet a man??

[Lester316]

I'm probably not being any help here but I'll add an opinion.

I often wonder as a guy (who doesn't live in a particularly big UK town) how to meet a TS girl when there aren't clubs and bars that I could socialize in; so whilst it's from a slightly different perspective I can empathize.

Anyhow to me you fall into the Pornstar category of 'wow - out of my league I'm just an average bloke' but perhaps other people who have experience of the industry can help. I assume that regardless of gender, or who they are looking to meet, people who have worked in the adult industry must have had experience when it comes dating and finding someone who likes them for who they are rather than the 'fan' perception that comes from seeing them on screen.

I know my opinion doesn't really help at all probably but it's just what went through my head. Regardless you are stunning and having read your posts here and there have a genuine sense of humor and personality so whomever you do meet should count himself as a lucky guy.

(Also for any other Brits reading this I'm sorry for American spellings but I can't work out how to change the dictionary and I hate the little red wavy lines that keep popping up lol.)

[Ts RedVeX]

Can you build 4 equalateral triangles with 6 matches without breaking or crossing the matches?

Unless you know this trick, you will most likely not succed unless you stop constraining yourself.

I know that I am some sort of a star or idol for most of you here but believe it of not, I do have my private life as well. Those who tried to call or text me during weekends already know it as I did not answer or texted back asking to call me in my working hours.

As a person standing on the other side of the barricade, I can say that I also constrain myself: I blocked PMs on here, as well as I lost badoo and a few other profiles limiting accessibility to only those whom I have met with and liked in reality.. Others will constrain themselves to only getting to know those whose skin is thick enough to withstand their piercingly bitchy attitude... Even though I have met exceptions, most of use will not be out of anyone's league because of who we are but because of how people see us - as you said - so why not give it a go? Unless, of course, you are perfectly fine with being a fan - especially that you seem to live far

Oh yeah, the question in the title is rethorical and was only meant to ridicule a bit threads of the "where do I meet tgirls" sort. - We are humam too goddamit xD

[CoolAwesomeBXDude]

whats wrong with just being yourself.

start out with building friendships with these ppl

[Tapatio]

Funny turn in this thread, RedVex- but important: it must be difficult.

You forgot a category of guys:

The guys who seem to fit the bill, but turn out not to be a good ally.

That was me. I had everything else my ex needed but couldn't fully reconcile myself to her vocation. I thought I could. I tried. But she'd come off of a road trip and spend the first night back in my bed- I love her (still) but those nights were difficult. I'd hold her, welcome her, talk or not (usually not) depending on what she needed, but...

I failed her. She deserves better and even though she tried to make it work too, it had to end.

Best of luck to us all.

[Lester316]

Ah..

I guess I should have guessed there might have been a less literal and more rhetorical meaning to the thread; so partly my answer would lend itself to putting my foot in mouth somewhat and falling into the trap of aping those very threads your mentioned that ask "where do I meet tgirls". I guess there I'm 2 for 2.

I can say that although I don't have any matches handy I'm sure three dimensional thinking over two would solve that one.

I'm as guilty as anybody of putting people into boxes at times such as 'pornstar' and 'fan' but to be fair it is hard to move beyond the connotations of such roles; it's nice to think that in person I could strike up a conversation easily enough with someone I see as being so glamorous but (and I'm totally talking personally here - I'm sure lots of other guys are filled with self-confidence) the thing that would truly hold me back is not so much having a 'star' perception of someone but more my own insecurities.

That all said one thing I love about this site is that here we do get genuine human responses from people who are stars and it makes them all that more attractive in my eyes as they move beyond being the 'hot person in the video'.

Hopefully my waffling makes some sense...


P.S.: I'm terribly aware that after mentioning my guilt about putting people into boxes/labeling I continue doing it later. But it was done in a positive way (I hope). Someone please tell me off if I do it too much though.

[tarot]

If the guy could not accept your vocation , then he would need to be rich and generous .There is no way , you could give up the financial freedom and earning power you have - you would need to be compensated .Just being a pragmatist here , as love does not conquer all.

[Ts RedVeX]

Quite a few things:

The more yourself you are the more egocentric if not narcissistic you may appear in the eyes of others and the higher risk you run of being rejected, which, in turn, is the main reason why most people try to conceal their real self. It may actually lead to total social alienation in extreme cases.

I think that the Internet has made people lazy. They do not try to conform with anything any more and expect everyone else to conform with their poins of view. - Now, how short-sighted is that?

You can never be completely yourself. The key is to find a person who will tolerate as much of yourself as you really need to show and vice versa. THe more yourselves both of you will be able to display to eachother, the happier and better your relationship will be... Shame that most people will not believe me and stick to forging their fake images, both on- and off-line.

As to earning powers and compensation... I work 4,5 days a week, which means I could potentially earn over 35% more, as travelling is included in those 4,5 days. the 35% is what my freedom is worth for me. Also I could invest in some drugs and work 24/7, lower my prices and get more clients... It's just not me. I am not selling my soul for a pile of paper bigger than it needs to be.

[Lester316]

I have to admit this is the first time I've really engaged in a conversation as part of a thread here, generally in the past I've commented on the odd thing I have experience on or stuck to reading what people have to say.

In many ways I sort of feel like I'm still feeling my way around, trying to work out the dos and don'ts of the boards - for me I want to conform (and not break any rules of course) but remain individual and hopefully genuine. The internet has become a place where being able to give an opinion in an unbridled way has lead to many people thinking they can say what they think and not care who it hurts and that is a shame.

Thinking of something said earlier; I am happy being a fan, I wouldn't have found my way here if I wasn't and the site has really opened my eyes in many ways. Getting to see beyond porn and hear opinions has been quite interesting. I've never been one to subscribe to socially constructed ideas of gender or sexual identity rather just simply thinking people should be able to be who they want to be; with luck that means meeting the right person in the future too.

Mostly I suppose I can't help but think wouldn't it be nice to instead of asking 'where do I go to meet a TS/How do I meet a man??' and thinking of what clubs/bars or other options there might be to be able to just meet the type of person you want to anywhere and not feel awkward because of other people's socially constructed ideas of 'normal'.

[Ts RedVeX]

The internet and real life are two different things and the latter ecloses the former, not the other way around. I see the Internet as only one dimmension of the multi-dimmensional space we are all living in. It is just one of the tools our world offers us - craftsmen of our own lives - to make the best out of our lives. The sad part is that tools, such as drugs, fame, money, religion, a tablesaw or anything really, used in an inapropriate way can be lethal. Taken to an extreme they can make us loose contact with the other dimmensions , or fingers, rendering us disabled in terms of participating in life.

As to posting things on line... Not many people care what they post and I don't think it should all be read and analysed before it is taken seriously or be let out the other... eye?

[Anubis1779]

The girl who I've been crazy about for the last two years simply walked into a college-type bar (bunch of hipsters, PBR specials, etc.) that I happened to be at for the only time. I went there because I was transferring soon and was having some beers with a good friend. So she walks in and I'm immediately eyeballing her. I see her head near the back with her group of friends so I decide to fake a trip to the bathroom so I can get a better look at her. The area where the bathrooms are is separated from the bar by a glass door. I walk out as she starts to head towards the ladies room and held the door for her, said hello and smiled and got one in return. I noticed she seemed to know the bartender so I asked him for her name, bumped into her once more on the way out, looked her up on Facebook and sent her a message and we've been talking since. I can't wait to move back to the States and really start dating her since I met her about a week before I moved!