Any jokes?

[GroobySteven]

My Thai Wife left me for no reason.


She`ll be back, with her tail between her legs.

That's fucking good! I'm stealing it for mine!

[Jericho]

I Googled "Gary Oldman" and got some pretty disturbing images - he's really let himself go, I thought.
Then I realized, I'd left the "R" out.

[Jericho]

Teacher asks Kids about their Dads job's.
Mary say's "My Dad's a Lawyer, he puts bad people in Prison".
Jack say's "My Dad's a Doctor, He make's sick people better.
Johnny Say's," My Dad's dead ".
The teacher asks " Well what did he do before he died? and Johnny replies "He turned Blue and Shit on the carpet"!

[JenniferParisHusband]

A father and son were on their farm in Kentucky, looking over a wooden fence into a field where the cows are. Suddenly a bull comes up from behind a cow, hops up and starts going at it.

TIMMY: Paw, what's them a doin?

PA: Well son, them's a fucking.

TIMMY: What's that paw?

PA: Head on home, I'm a gonna learn ya something (because that's how they really do talk in Kentucky.)

Timmy runs home with his dad who throws open the door, boldly marching into the living room where his wife is in a rocking chair knitting.

PA: Maw, you head on upstairs, we're a gonna fuck.

The wife throws up her hands in praise, gives a rebel yell and runs up the steps in unbridled joy. Followed soon after by her husband, and son, who stop in the open doorway looking at the now naked woman lying anxiously on the bed.

PA: Son, the first thing you've gotta do, is get yerself naked.

The father takes off all his clothing.

PA: Next, you've gotta get yerself hard.

The father reaches down and gives a few tugs until he's hard.

PA: Now, you see that hole between your Maw's legs? I'm a gonna go and get it!

The father jumps on the bed and started going to work on his wife as his dutiful son keenly watches. Soon after, Timmy's little brother Tommy shows up.

TOMMY: Brother, what's Maw and Paw a doing?

TIMMY: Why, them's a fuckin.

TOMMY: What's that?

TIMMY: Pay attention, I'm about to learn ya something. First, ya gotta get yerself naked.

Timmy takes off all his clothing.

TIMMY: Then you gotta get yerself hard.

Timmy fondles himself until he's rigid.

TIMMY: Now, you see that hole between daddy's legs? I'm a gonna go and get it!

[Jericho]

10 years, trillions of dollars, thousands of soldiers dead, state of the art technology, but the US finally found Bin Laden.
...In his house.

[Jericho]

"Jesus loves you".
A nice gesture in church...but not something you want to hear in a Mexican prison.

[brickcitybrother]

Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
A: Your Honor.
Q: What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50
A: Senator.

[brickcitybrother]

Q: What do you call a nun with a sex change operation?

A: A tran-sister.

[TSCURIOUS]

And I don't care - it's funny

What's a Jewish dilemma?





Free Ham

[NYCTSluv]

Great avatar Jericho. Ha