Why are many admirers flaky?

[MsDazzler]

Hmm... actually... I have noticed that if it is a bar date, men tends to flake out more often than if it was at my place or his place...

but for safety's sake, I usually insist on meeting in a public place, which, of course, is what most closeted men do not want so they usually flake out.

However, I'd rather be flaked out on than be sexually assaulted or even worse, murdered in my own place or his place during that first meeting.

I've been coerced into having sex few times when the man would meet me directly at my place right away off Internet. No more.

Experience is a bitter pill!

[Westheangelino]

I've defended one side, so I will defend the other as well as the conversation has developed. In defense of the flakes, you never really know what is on the other side of that door until you're in the room.

Case in point, I put up a CL ad for a hung top. To my delight, a very well known porn star answered and wanted me to come to her place. Even though it was just for fun and she wanted to fuck around, she has spent so long in the game that I'm not sure that she still knows how to interact with anyone without acting like an escort. So, imagine being told to park near an intersection, give a call, then come up some stairs and look for the cracked door. Some dudes would bolt somewhere in that process. Luckily, she was everything I had ever hoped for and waaaay more, and the whole situation was legit. However, there have been a couple times where I just got an incredibly bad feeling, powered through, and then had to swiftly exit upon meeting because the looks and/or personality were so far removed than what was presented via email.

[canihavu]

Hmm... actually... I have noticed that if it is a bar date, men tends to flake out more often than if it was at my place or his place...

but for safety's sake, I usually insist on meeting in a public place, which, of course, is what most closeted men do not want so they usually flake out.

However, I'd rather be flaked out on than be sexually assaulted or even worse, murdered in my own place or his place during that first meeting.

I've been coerced into having sex few times when the man would meet me directly at my place right away off Internet. No more.

Experience is a bitter pill!

Wow that's truly sad that you had to experience something like that.

[sophiebendable]

Yup, the flakiness I was talking about has been when planning to meet for dinner or drinks. I often assume it is because they didn't want to be seen with me...

[Westheangelino]

^ Ah, gotcha. Well, in that case there is no defense as far as I'm concerned.

[aboutthezote]

Whenever I use CL looking for xdresser/ TS all I get is middle aged guys who want me to supply the clothes and dress them..."you get me some panties and I'll let you fuck me..."

On the rare occasions I do get someone close to genuine they flake as soon as I propose a meeting. I think a lot of people respond to CL ads whilst they are wanking... which to be fair is a bit of a skill.

My fault for living in the middle of nowhere.

[caliuncut]

I think there are valid points in pretty much everyone's posts. I think the thing to keep in mind here is that in the olden days...people were flakes too but its just heightened in the age of the interwebs as it increases the people we meet and talk to tenfold hence increasing the run ins with flakes. However, I for one know I've met many truly amazing people and had amazing experiences that would never ever have happened were it not for me sifting and wading through the fakes and flakes.

[MdR Dave]

Even worse actually... I had guys I was chatting to professionally (colleagues) who were just talking about work and being decent normal people (when they thought I was a woman)... but when I revealed I was actually trans, suddenly it was sex... how does any guy get the idea they could talk to me like that out of the blue just because I'm trans? Hellll no. Especially not from some guy working as a waiter or barely making rent ~_~

That last part made me lol.

[nysprod]

Case in point, I put up a CL ad for a hung top. To my delight, a very well known porn star answered and wanted me to come to her place.

To my recollection, you've posted a few other of these hard-to-believe comments...CL, with a collection of freaks that I wouldn't touch with my worst enemy's dick and lo and behold, a "well known porn star" answers your ad and just found you impossible to resist?

[nysprod]

I've been coerced into having sex few times when the man would meet me directly at my place right away off Internet. No more.Experience is a bitter pill!

So, you're not a porn star or escort, and you work with kids. But you invite total strangers to your place and allow yourself to get "coerced" into having sex? Something's missing...