GUYS: Would you ever date a part time CD/TV?

**bte** · 07-13-2010

To the answer to your topic question of "Guys: Would you ever date a part time CD/TV?"

My answer to that is yes. I mean only if the person and I were to click in some way and I enjoyed being around them. You really can't control who you like and want to get to know.

**dan_drade** · 07-13-2010

Originally Posted by TsVanessa69

I think that is very shallow of you to even say something like that.
I wonder if woman treated you like that, what would your chances be?

Probably slim to none. Lol

**BrendaQG** · 07-13-2010

I have to agree with Vanessa. Men decide who they screw in mysterious ways. There are beautiful successful women who have horrible luck with men, and fugly women who have great luck. That's not even talking about TS's yet.

Oh sure if you transition, you'll have guys who want your functioning pre almost everything tool. If all you want is sex I guess that's ok. Eventually that tool is a little soft then what?

Last but not least some ladies riddicule stories like yours. Which is a damm shame because what you say according to various psychologist is quite common. Weather we feel that such a story reflects on us or not, the community should be more understanding. But it is not, and I would encourage you to delete your post.

As for it being shallow to point out the issue of looks. The world is shallow. Many people judge a woman GG or TS on her looks. Various studies show that women who meet our standards of beauty get an easier ride than those who do not. source source It's not all that there is by any means, but looks do matter.

**Star Angel 86** · 07-13-2010

My answer is yes my good Scottish friend Kirsty Scott,immediately comes to mind and yeah I would date her in a heartbeat.

**GrimFusion** · 07-13-2010

I'd think that having cross-dressed for the majority of your life, you would have realized it's a fetish by now if that were the case. I highly doubt it is, especially since you view it as a barrier to a quality relationship. You'd be wrong in that view, but when things don't work out, it's human nature to blame yourself.

If I could offer any advice, it'd be to change the venue a bit. If you find yourself hitting clubs to pick up men, try finding them elsewhere. Keep guys in the "friend zone" for a month or two, introduce your CD nature, and keep an eye on them for a bit to see if they're actually willing to stick around. Protect yourself and be a bit more cautious. You'll soon find you're attracting a new brand of guy who's quite a bit more quality. That's not to say they'll accept you, but at least you won't get three months in and find out you've been cheated on.

I get it. Being alone blows, but it's a hell of a lot better than getting played over and over again. It sounds as though your self-worth has already taken a pretty big hit, and it's going to take some time for that to heal.

**cdastoria** · 07-13-2010

Originally Posted by GrimFusion

I'd think that having cross-dressed for the majority of your life, you would have realized it's a fetish by now if that were the case. I highly doubt it is, especially since you view it as a barrier to a quality relationship. You'd be wrong in that view, but when things don't work out, it's human nature to blame yourself.

If I could offer any advice, it'd be to change the venue a bit. If you find yourself hitting clubs to pick up men, try finding them elsewhere. Keep guys in the "friend zone" for a month or two, introduce your CD nature, and keep an eye on them for a bit to see if they're actually willing to stick around. Protect yourself and be a bit more cautious. You'll soon find you're attracting a new brand of guy who's quite a bit more quality. That's not to say they'll accept you, but at least you won't get three months in and find out you've been cheated on.

I get it. Being alone blows, but it's a hell of a lot better than getting played over and over again. It sounds as though your self-worth has already taken a pretty big hit, and it's going to take some time for that to heal.

grim....how amazingly sweet are you. i cannot thank you enough.
Honestly, i haven't been out as a girl as of yet, but i very much welcome it. if there are any trans girls who are in or near NYC, please let me know.

I find it interesting that, thus far, no one has said "you definitely sound trans to me." I guess that confirms my confusions.

**kyoJecours** · 07-13-2010

cdastoria you seem such a sweet person i'm sure there are plenty of guys out there who would love to be with you. it sounds as if you are insecure with how you are at the moment which is probably to do with the confusion you feel. i would say don't be negative about how you feel and embrace it. everyone is different and so many guys would find you special. that's not to say they would date you but that's more to do with their own insecurities so don't let it get you down. how you carry yourself has a lot to do with attraction so maybe when you have more confidence to go out dressed up things could change for you. and i bet you look real sexy dressed up

**SarahG** · 07-13-2010

Originally Posted by cdastoria

However, I'm at a loss. Like I said, I've never written anything on these boards before. I just need some advice, thoughts, or help.

Am I really trans? Do I just have a strong fetish? Is it a depression-coping method?

You say you've been doing this going back pretty much all your life. You ask if it is a depression-coping method: were you depressed all those years as well? From the sound of it, your depression has to do with the fact that you're lonely and can't find what you consider a good relationship. If that is the extent of it, then I would not suppose it is a depressing coping method since, after all, having relationship issues did not begin until many years after you started dressing (I highly doubt it was on your mind at all when you were dressing at six...).

"what I've read seems to classify me as a typical transsexual" Can you elaborate?

The fetish question is hard to answer from the post, your story includes several things that would make me wonder about the possibility: 1- you describe erotic genitalia sensations at 6-7 when you started, 2- you talk about masturbation while dressed at ~10, 3- you talk about getting dressed explicitly so that you can masturbate, and that after doing so your drive to dress disappears until the next time you need to masturbate, 4- the idea of transitioning/feminizing is apart of your sexual fantasies (i.e. starting hrt).

1-3 sound like stereotypical TV behavior, 4 sounds like textbook AG (and despite all the people who claim AG doesn't exist, there are people who have posted on this forum in the past saying that they are AG and identify as AG).

**ed_jaxon** · 07-13-2010

I always was under the impression that someone who derived sexual pleasure from dressing in the opposite sexes clothing was by definition a transvestite.