GUYS: Would you ever date a part time CD/TV?

[harri10]

I would but don't tell my wife!

[cdastoria]

cdastoria you seem such a sweet person i'm sure there are plenty of guys out there who would love to be with you. it sounds as if you are insecure with how you are at the moment which is probably to do with the confusion you feel. i would say don't be negative about how you feel and embrace it. everyone is different and so many guys would find you special. that's not to say they would date you but that's more to do with their own insecurities so don't let it get you down. how you carry yourself has a lot to do with attraction so maybe when you have more confidence to go out dressed up things could change for you. and i bet you look real sexy dressed up

kyojecours...
thank you so much. that's very, very sweet of you.
I guess my biggest problem is that i'm not transitioned yet and that means i'm not really going to find what i want. i'm just a normal average (not fem/not masc) gay guy during the day so no one would really know what I am inside unless I started dressing it or looking like it. Therein lies the problem. I guess I just don't have the confidence to do it alone.

[kyoJecours]

kyojecours...
thank you so much. that's very, very sweet of you.
I guess my biggest problem is that i'm not transitioned yet and that means i'm not really going to find what i want. i'm just a normal average (not fem/not masc) gay guy during the day so no one would really know what I am inside unless I started dressing it or looking like it. Therein lies the problem. I guess I just don't have the confidence to do it alone.

i guess my understanding of your situation is only limited since i'm a straight guy who has never had any inclination to dress. but there are so many girls who have experienced what you are going through so if you ever do make the choice to transition then i'm sure there would be so many people willing to help you and you wouldn't have to do it alone. what i would say though is that it is YOUR life and you only get one chance so you should do anything it takes to be happy. i've never had to make such a massive decision so it's easy for me to say but fuck what anyone else thinks. i'm sure people will try and bring you down but that's only because we live in a brainwashed society where most people can't think for themselves. you say you're depressed... imagine how beautiful it would feel for you to be truly happy with yourself. x

[rameses2]

My two cents: If your serious about staying part time and you did get into a relationship and the guy would only be with you when you were girled out, wouldn't it seem like you're only getting half of a relationship? I know, for me, if she wasn't planning on transitioning, I couldn't see myself being with her. It would be in the back of my mind that she was still living as a guy, and I'm not wired that way. I hope this wasn't disrespectful, cdastoria, it's just what I think.

[BrendaQG]

To cdastoria:

Don't go by anyone else's judgement, but think carefully about this. If you are any kind of a transsexual you will simply find life as a man unbearable, undoable, and depressing. That common emotional fact is what makes us who and what we are.

Have I ever been depressed when living as a woman, sure. The difference was that the time I lived as a man was one constant depression. I never felt truly happy and content I only ever felt less depressed. No matter what else was going on in my life. For me the four years I spent living strictly as an adult male were like prison. Do you feel like you are in the most depressing prison now?

You say you've been doing this going back pretty much all your life. You ask if it is a depression-coping method: were you depressed all those years as well? From the sound of it, your depression has to do with the fact that you're lonely and can't find what you consider a good relationship. If that is the extent of it, then I would not suppose it is a depressing coping method since, after all, having relationship issues did not begin until many years after you started dressing (I highly doubt it was on your mind at all when you were dressing at six...).

"what I've read seems to classify me as a typical transsexual" Can you elaborate?

The fetish question is hard to answer from the post, your story includes several things that would make me wonder about the possibility: 1- you describe erotic genitalia sensations at 6-7 when you started, 2- you talk about masturbation while dressed at ~10, 3- you talk about getting dressed explicitly so that you can masturbate, and that after doing so your drive to dress disappears until the next time you need to masturbate, 4- the idea of transitioning/feminizing is apart of your sexual fantasies (i.e. starting hrt).

1-3 sound like stereotypical TV behavior, 4 sounds like textbook AG (and despite all the people who claim AG doesn't exist, there are people who have posted on this forum in the past saying that they are AG and identify as AG).

Yeah I hinted at the whole Autogynephilia angle of her story. As for what you say about people saying it does not exist. I'm a bit confused on that lately because many activist have embraced one psycholigst work on this. Charles Moser who asserts that his research shows that Autogynephilia is common to most if not all women. Personally I think his research was flawed, i.e. asking a woman if she gets hot from dressing up for a date and anticipating sex with a man is not the same as what this person here just wrote about. IMO. The fact that Moser has not been attacked the way the others were is puzzeling considering what's happend in the past.

[sucka4chix]

I'm a 32yo who has dressed my whole life. I'm thinking of transitioning but I care more about being in a relationship. The type of guys I like usually are not "gay" and I'm a complete and total bottom.

Do I have a chance of finding someone or should I transition first? I'm definitely not full time now. I still live as a boy most of the time but I'd love to find someone who will accept the other side of me first.

Is that asking too much?

To answer the thread-- NO! I would never!
To answer the last question, yes I think that's asking too much! I know nothing about being trans, but to me this sounds definitely like a fetish. What I do know is that ANY guy who wants you for you and you live as a guy most of the time, is going to be GAY. Nothing wrong with that, but that's a reality you need to face (You say you like guys who are not "gay")

[SarahG]

Yeah I hinted at the whole Autogynephilia angle of her story. As for what you say about people saying it does not exist. I'm a bit confused on that lately because many activist have embraced one psycholigst work on this. Charles Moser who asserts that his research shows that Autogynephilia is common to most if not all women. Personally I think his research was flawed, i.e. asking a woman if she gets hot from dressing up for a date and anticipating sex with a man is not the same as what this person here just wrote about. IMO. The fact that Moser has not been attacked the way the others were is puzzeling considering what's happend in the past.

It's really not that puzzling, the big difference here is that Moser isn't going and saying "all GG's are either AG's -or- really fem gay guys." If he were arguing something that inflammatory, I am sure the reaction would be different. What Moser is saying is basically that all women are women, but some of them have this AG fetish... he's not going and attacking anyone's gender-status per-say. Even someone who is labeled AG in this work, is still considered a woman.

Which goes back to what I've been saying for years: there are people out there (of both sexes) who have clothing-related fetishes, and that these fetishes are wholly and completely separate from their gender status and sex status.

[Helvis2012]

Almost exclusively.

[cdastoria]

Almost exclusively.

You mean that you date part-timers almost exclusively?

You DO know that i'm in NYC, right? lol. don't get my hopes up.

[dc_guy_75]

I've dated several crossdressers, though almost all of the were transsexuals at the beginning stages.

I never saw any of them (or wanted to be with them) when they weren't en femme, so it felt like "half a relationship" as another poster pointed out.

Edit:

Question: What's the difference between and corssdresser and transsexual?

Answer: 5 years