Because I escort, am I not relationship material???

[TsVanessa69]

No one. NO ONE. NO ONE comes out of sex work unscathed.

Very true, I feel the emotional scars already.

[goldensamba]

KOH765 spews,

a ho is a ho and a jump off is a jump off.. They are nothing more and are never meant to be wifey material.. . Only cornballs and losers turn washed up hoes into wives...

and InHouston follows,

There are "good time girls", and then the ones you marry. Know the difference.

Spoken like true cornballs and losers. I see... it has nothing to do with matters of trust, mutual respect and love, it’s just a matter of crudely putting people in their places. The usual business of assigning them neat little boxes and categories: ho, good time girl, housewife. That way you don’t have to think or treat people like the real complex human beings. Caution: this way lies deep dissatisfaction. There is no love in your future, just copulation, kids and cages.

And you're deluded. There is too much at risk when venturing into a serious relationship with a girl who's occupation is to entertain men. Hearth, home, children, finances, property, dignity, and pride are all ruined when you tangle up with such a girl who tears it all down because some knucklehead she met one night, who contributed nothing of the aforementioned to the relationship, ends up sleeping with her. A man who is serious about family life does not want his woman and the mother of his children to strip, lapdance, fuck, blow, or even flirt with other men, regardless of how she may justify it. And yes, when it comes to mates, you have to fit them into the neat little boxes and categories that will assure the both of you that you can depend on each other to build a life together. Get a clue.

Now comes Trish's ridiculous rebuttal.

I would have to agree with the part about who you want ot be the mother of your kids. Like I said before I don't really understand why moe girls don't just get regular jobs. Most of you are hot girls and no one would know you are TG anyway so why keep up the night job? I keep reading these posts about how people want on regular guy but you won't get one as long as you are in the business. Not the one you want anyway.

[goldensamba]

Its all about boundaries and what you define as "okay" ... not everyone was raised the same.

I am not sure that people raise their kids to grow up and not pay for sex. My parents definitely didn't raise me to do sex work. However they did make a clear mistake on my education and making sure I was to grow up and have a career.

My dad was an engineer, my grandfather wrote several books on the subject. I have a huge inclination to draw, plan and execute home projects, but I was never given the basics of a home education and the importance of having a plan and goals.

My parents were too busy fighting, abusing me, yelling, causing drama, etc... They had no time to give me the attention I truly needed.

I left home when I was 17 so I can get away from their abuse cycle. I had to learn everything on my own. I went on the only road I knew... The easiest road to get me to where I wanted to go. Without any guidance it was the only road I felt safe traveling down on.

It doesn't matter if you do sex work or if you are a lawyer. I think being a lawyer is a lot more of a dirty job then being a sex worker.

Being in the sex business you learn how to give others pleasure and to treat them the way they pay and expect to be treated, which usually means they don't get it else where.

Many people have a very twisted view on the job of an Escort, but I am basically a psychiatrist most of the time. I talk to my clients, I am their friend, I make them smile, I provide them a very special escape from the lives they feel pressured on living based on the same values that are placed over my head.

The same people who have "high morel values" are the ones who these clients want to escape from. There is certain expectation from my part if I am providing my clients with that atmosphere. They seek me for that mostly, and for most, paying ensures their discretion and disconnection from the responsibility to another human being.

It is not always a dirty and gross job to have. I am well respected, men love me ( to a certain extent ) take care of me, appreciate my time, spoil me, and allow me to guarantee myself a good future, which is just what I am doing.

There is nothing wrong with providing someone pleasure and a smile. I guess you can call me Geisha. I am an entertainer and I do not consider myself a whore.

Some lawyer on the other hand, are trained to protect criminals and get them out of crimes I myself would not even dream of committing. Lawyers can sometimes get money from people who get in car accidents and falsify claims. It's a very dirty job. Not for all but most.

"Morals" may apply to the those who do not have respect for others. I consider myself a woman with morals, and respect for human life, goals, self worth, love, happiness etc...

Why should I be judged by those who claim moral values when they use the excuse to belittle others? That to me is a dirty game.

My best friend Felicia Katt whom I respect very much, is someone with tremendous moral values and a person that I admire quite a bit. She reminds me when I get down on myself that what I do brings happiness to others and not sorrow. It makes me smile and helps me to continue to see other great parts of my soul, as opposed to focusing on what society expects my moral values to be.

There is no such thing as a collective moral value. Your values are individual to you only.

I am definitely not a bad person or less worthy of love because of my past. And if a man or his family may think so, why would I want to be around them? Even if I wasn't an adult entertainer, in my book, that is some fucked up shit to do to someone.

Your childhood and mine sound very similar. I think although it helps when parents are involved and teach you about goals and career paths, education, etc. in the end it's up to you. I lived m 17th year on a park bench but ended up going to one of the top colleges in the country and bulding a career with a 6 digit income. On the other hand I have a sister who has 8 kids and no educatiion and always bordering on homeless. It's all about your strength of character and will to survive. Some people are born survivors and some are not. Obviously you did alright no matter what choices you made. You are alive and thriving and successful in your own right which is more than I can say for a lot of others who come from similar backgrounds as we do and use that as an excuse for being a leech on society.

I have great respect for anyone who makes thier way to be sucessful on thier own no matter how they do it as ong as they are not hurting others. But.......I'm not sure that makes them relationship material.

[werwt22]

I would never trust a whore

LMAO sad but true

[Justawannabe]

Kelly wrote about the idea of her and her boyfriend being okay with it as part of a job that would eventually be put behind them after she achieves all the medical intervention she wants.

I worry whenever I hear this, in part because plastic surgery is often addictive, more so for the trans ladies I've met. In part because if the work really is lucrative, it will be hard to just decide to stop making that money. Not much pays so well per hour.

My current ex- went into the business, and we're talking about maybe getting back together... it's tough call for me... not so against pictures, but doing stuff with others is hard on me, but I really need to feel my partner values me and wants to give me something no one else can get. She says she just need to pay a few bills... but will she give it up for a more regular job... hard to say.

Sean

[TsVanessa69]

Kelly wrote about the idea of her and her boyfriend being okay with it as part of a job that would eventually be put behind them after she achieves all the medical intervention she wants.

I worry whenever I hear this, in part because plastic surgery is often addictive, more so for the trans ladies I've met. In part because if the work really is lucrative, it will be hard to just decide to stop making that money. Not much pays so well per hour.

My current ex- went into the business, and we're talking about maybe getting back together... it's tough call for me... not so against pictures, but doing stuff with others is hard on me, but I really need to feel my partner values me and wants to give me something no one else can get. She says she just need to pay a few bills... but will she give it up for a more regular job... hard to say.

Sean

Trust me baby when I tell you, when we meet a good guy as you seem to be, we value you and appreciate you more than you realize

[SarahG]

Most of you are hot girls and no one would know you are TG anyway so why keep up the night job? I keep reading these posts about how people want on regular guy but you won't get one as long as you are in the business. Not the one you want anyway.

Related:

Did you know our wonderful social security administration went around the past two years outting tgirls who were working in stealth?

Yup, they put filters on their databases so the stuff employers submit for SSA related stuff would red flag anyone whose information on the file at the SSA differs from what is being sent to the SSA.

Once that happens, they send your employer a "gender no match" letter telling your employer that their records are not correct and need to be changed.

Last I read, unless you mislead the SSA, they require SRS to change your gender on file- at least if playing things by the way the feds want you to do it. I talked to the SSA workers at the federal building I went to back when I had my name changed, and they echoed what that state's DMV said- srs is required and they needed not just a surgeon letter, but the surgery notes (so much for medical record privacy). They could have misunderstood the requirements, I am sure, but srs was according to the horse's own mouth what was needed.

SS cards don't (at least mine doesn't) show your sex status on file with the SSA, so if your DL is in order your employer would otherwise never know (if you pass). Now some employers will terminate your ass for lying on company paperwork, especially the stuff that's used in dealing with the feds. So you're outted, your employer knows, and you maybe out of your job -and that termination would stand even under discrimination laws.

Also alot of employers are gonna call you out if you show up and have a blank resume from the past _ years of working off the books. If you pay your taxes you can use that you're an entertainer as a response and depending on the employer may not be an issue. In some cities (Philly is one) you have to be licensed just to be a dancer within city limits... might not be great on your resume if you're going for that 2nd grade school teacher position, but it may not be a prob for some other jobs.

Worst case is gonna be the unpassing girl whose been working off the books for 20 years, has no education, no resume, no degrees, and no experience. I know ggs who have spent 20+ yrs working as dancers in shady low end cash only bars, they can't even get a job bagging groceries for min wage at your local grocery store.

[TsVanessa69]

My love interest lives in new Jersy,has decided to come to see me here in Chicago and spend some quality time getting to know me and see where and how I live. I will be flying in to NYC as I do every year, for Thanksgiving, where I will go to the Bronx and meet his sister, as his mother has passed and his father abandoned them when he was very small. I have already talked with his sisters and his neices on the phone. The little girls, are very anxious to meet me, as they have seen my myspace page. I don't know if they fully understand yet or not.

[Teydyn]

Just as i said earlier, good luck to you.

It CAN work.


My wife is a TS, a bit older then me, works as an escort and we are together for 6 years now, married for almost 1. I have no problem with her work, as i know she loves me.

If you love someone, you love her. No questions asked.
Now you just need to be strong enough to be true to yourself.

When we first met, i told her "All my friends will accept you".
And all my friends did.
The ones that didnt werent my friends...

[TsVanessa69]

Just as i said earlier, good luck to you.

It CAN work.


My wife is a TS, a bit older then me, works as an escort and we are together for 6 years now, married for almost 1. I have no problem with her work, as i know she loves me.

If you love someone, you love her. No questions asked.
Now you just need to be strong enough to be true to yourself.

When we first met, i told her "All my friends will accept you".
And all my friends did.
The ones that didnt werent my friends...

Thank you. I'm hoping for the best.