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Thread: Sex Change Surgery Regret
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05-19-2008 #1
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Sex Change Surgery Regret
I thought this might be a good discussion/argument/debate to kick off.
So when is SRS the right or wrong choice?When is a doctor doing harm by not preforming or preforming the surgery?Who does the ultimate decision rely on the doctor or patient?
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05-19-2008 #2
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05-19-2008 #3
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But what if the ultimate decision to be a woman was made by a man who thought he was a woman or vice versa.If you watched the clip the doctor is getting sued by his former patient for preforming SRS.If he proves that he wasn't in his right mind then the doc's gonna be liable.maybe?
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05-19-2008 #4
I was under the impression that in order to undergo SRS, an individual must have gone through a period of counseling and various mental and physical evaluations and not until these steps are accomplished (results reviewed and approved by doctors) may an individual move forward with the operation.
I suspect if the proper steps were not taken a doctor would not perform the operation and if he did, he could be subject to any number of consequences, including loss of license and legal action.
If the individual successfully passed all the pre requirements and elected to have the operation, I have a hard time understanding how a doctor could be responsible for a case of "buyers remorse."
Regardless, it appears to be an unfortunate situation for all concerned.
Before You Attempt to Beat the Odds, Be Sure You Could Survive The Odds Beating You.
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05-19-2008 #5
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- Mar 2008
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I like "it's" quote at the end.
" These people that had this done are not women, they are mutilated men. I am not arguing that these people are not in pain. I am not arguing they don't need relief. I have been there, I know what it's like. Whether amputating their body parts is the right therapy is what I am questioning. "
Notice he didn't use " I ". In psychologically this is done as a way to disconnect from your own problems, which in reality is that he made a personal choice to have a surgery, altering his body with the delusion it would bring him happiness, relief from depression, self acceptance...etc...
I went through that stage myself. I questioned if I made the right choice, but it was based on other's view of me, as he put it " a mutilated man ". Wether or not people chose to see me as one, I see myself as a complete individual - woman or man. One who made an individual choice as an adult to alter my body so that I can live a happier existence, aside from other's opinions and visions of me. I do not seek acceptance but happiness, within myself and my own life.
If he is unhappy with his personal choice that is on him. Ultimately he would have found ways to have the surgery aside from the proper guidelines. I know this because, in his words " I have been there ". My psychiatrist just signed on the doted line after interviewing me, but after I expressed my views clearly he had no problem doing so. Not only that but I am clearly a woman in his and society's materialistic/visual eyes.
The doctor is not responsible for his decision AT ALL.
To say, just because a clearly gorgeous and passible woman wants to be complete in her own skin makes her mutilated after surgery is ridiculous. So, if a person has his/her legs amputated they are not human? Or if I get a nose job or breast implants I became less human? Ultimately am I less human because I am transgender, further more, am I less responsible for my own choices because I blame others for my mistakes?
This is a bad analogy but here it goes... If someone picks up a gun and kills another, is he/she allowed to blame that on upbringing? Or are we right to say that someone is "clinically ill" after they shoot a person? Or would it be better to give someone proper punishment if they claim insanity pre-crime?
It is obvious he is extremely regretful of his own personal choice and deeply saddened by the outcome of his life. Who's to say that if he didn't get surgery he would still be a woman or gone back to being a man? Does it make him less of a man that he has a pussy? Are trans men less men because they don't have a penis? Am I just a man without a penis who dresses like a woman?
PERSONALLY, I think most of the time this happens is with the lesbian trans women. I met plenty in Thailand. Not that I am passing judgement, or basing this on any study. But many who got the surgery were like men. Their actions and mannerisms were that of men...They spoke of fucking women as men do. Of their post breast implant surgery massages as a sexual experience performed by "young thai girls". It was a time they all cherished. I have a big problem when professionals diagnose these individuals for sex change. But that is just me, and I truly believe that this individual in the documentary is one of those people. Someone who will never be happy no matter what path his life goes.
In any case. Just because he is bitter with the path he chose and wants someone to blame does not justify a lawsuit. It should be dismissed and on top of that he should continue therapy and teach himself how to admit fault and not pass his problems and bad judgement on others based on his misery and suffering.
I am extremely happy with my " mutilated parts ". Happier then I have been in a very very long time.
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05-19-2008 #6
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- In the hearts of the kind, and in the fears of the wicked.
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Originally Posted by LAGent4ts
and evaluation, and deep and thorough introspection.
Unfortunately there are some women that convince themselve and others
that they are prepared for GRS. They may then find a surgeon
domestically, or one abroad where the Benjamin Standards Of Care aren't
as rigorously adhered to
As a post op woman myself, I can attest that GRS isn't for everyone, and
isn't the cure-all that some women believe.
To quote from Lynn Conway's A WARNING FOR THOSE CONSIDERING MtF SRS:
In the large majority of cases, transsexual (TS) transitions work out well
over the long-term, as we've seen in the many stories documented in
Lynn's Transsexual Women's Successes page. However, in some cases a
complete TS transition may totally fail to meet very unrealistic
expectations, and way too late the transitioner may realize that
undergoing sex reassignment surgery (SRS) was a BIG mistake.
Some examples of "wrong reasons" and wrong situations for undergoing
SRS are (i) efforts to become a center of attention and live a "sexy life",
(ii) thinking it will "automatically turn oneself into a woman" in others'
eyes, (iii) deciding to become a woman on a whim (for example, in the
midst of a mid-life crisis), (iv) doing it for autosexual "thrills", (v) doing it
while suffering from preexisting serious mental conditions unrelated to
GID (depression, bi-polar conditions,...), etc.
Regrets and adjustment difficulties seem to occur especially frequently in
the cases of older intense crossdressers and sexual fetishists whose drive
to transition is based primarily on male sexual feelings and habits. These
individuals will gradually lose their male libidinous responses to their new
female body as time passes after the removal of their testicles during
SRS. This loss of libidinous rewards, combined with accumulating
practical, social and emotional difficulties in postoperative life, can lead to
serious long-term adjustment difficulties for those who've "made a
mistake". (This effect is quite different from the experiencing of a
heightened female libido and improvements in lovemaking capability that
occur in many other postoperative TS cases).
The bottom line here is that EXTREME CAUTION is advised if you are
unsure of your motives for SRS.
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05-19-2008 #7
Ridiculous. What an idiot. He made a choice and now regrets it, to blame it on others is pretty pathetic. I'm feeling some religion in there somewhere ... maybe ?
I liked this comment :
"Based on so much evidence of regret so far, as a medical practiononer, I strogly believe srs should be completely stoped. therapist should invest more time effort and compassion in dealing with the real psychological issues, not alter the body."
Hmmm a "medical practiononer" who can't even spell? BULLSHIT!!!
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05-19-2008 #8
I can imagine just what Mr. Finch felt. Like what TS DANIELLE FOXXX said.
I went through a period where I started to feel kind of what Mr. Finch feels now. I did not have surgery all of my change has been achieved by hormones. So changing back simply meant stopping them...for four and a half years. I did it so I could get through life at a particularly transphobic UNIV. I thought I could whip through real quick. It ended up taking 3.5 years before I was done with them and another year of hormones and having laser before I felt I could live as a woman again. ( Say what you will about other people. I am not them. They are not me and they were not in exactly the same place I was.)
What went on with me, what's going on with him, and like has already been said... Mr. Finch and his case sounds more like a reaction to what other people thought of him as a TS woman. He may have loathed himself as a gay male.
Perhaps Finch should have never had surgery and just lived as a non-op woman. (Though that is an option many TS's of European decent do not take seriously for some reason.) Then he would not have been a mutilated, plain looking, man. Instead she could have been a really cunty fishy queen.
Basically, Finch, needed to learn self esteem and self love BEFORE having surgery.
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05-19-2008 #9
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- Mar 2007
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Highly interesting thread. I'm also deeply convinced that MANY of those persons
around have similar issues, that simply are related to some form of human identity
crysis. That syndrome is very complex thing, and can be manifested in thousands of
differrent ways. Hovewer, personaly I think there is no way to cure that. Even the
guy on the youtube video probably still asks himself in front of the mirror - "who
the hell I really am". And if not, then the time will probably come for him to wind up
in doubt with himself again. But luckily, in most democratic societies today, there is a
freedom of choice. And that freedom helps that kind of people to choose their life long
paths. And usually, the majority of them make the right decision. They bravely choose their
path. That's very important. To choose a path. And it does not matter what path to pick,
but it's important to pick only one of many being "offered" by the brain.
And it should be one-way path. Only the one-way path might bring them to the happyness.
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05-19-2008 #10
yeah i saw this a while ago. sucks for mr finch. he was totally hot.