Love, Men, & Transsexuals

[Mr. Sinister]

I want to dedicate this thread to all the beautiful transwomen out there looking for love and hope this will give insight into the mind of the men who adore you.

I read numerous threads started by T-girls complaining about men and how they are only interested in sex, and not a relationship. Males are biologically programmed because of testerone, which is a primary sex hormone, to want sex all the time. In general, men, Gay or Straight, think about sex almost every single day of their lives. Women and transwomen should not persecute the males species because of our desire to want to have sex. Several prisoners in an article that I read in a local newspaper indicated that the worst part of being in prison was not having sex. One of the prisoners had spent 10 years in a Colombian prison and first thing he wanted to do after he got out was have sex. Is it really a surprise when straight prisoners start engaging in homosexual sex acts in prison? A male's sexual desires often cloud his better judgement. Take a look at Elliot Spittzer, an Ivy League graduate, who was consumed by his desire to have sexual relations, even if it meant losing his job as govenor.

With regards to relationships, many men are afraid to commit to transwomen because of their fear of losing their family and friends. Also, society tends to label any man that is in love with a transwomen as being GAY. Once a male is labled gay, he becomes the subject of humiliation and taunting. Gay males are twice as likely to encounter death threats because of their sexuality than lesbians. Look at Calipernia Adams and her lover, Barry Winchell. Barry Winchell, a straight soldier in the U.S. army, lost his life because someone assumed he was gay for being in love with Calipernia. Is it any wonder why males are so afraid of being in a relationship with a TS in public? We could end up losing our jobs, family, friends, and even, our lives.

One day, I hope to live in a world that is more tolerant of gays, lesbians, bisexuals, and transgenders. A world in which one can live his or her life without fear of persecution or death.

[Luna555]

The problem isnt that we dont get it. the problem is that allot of guys treat us way different than when they are trying to "date" a cis gendered women

[dc_guy_75]

Luna,

I think you could have your choice of most any understanding guy. You seem like a wonderful person.

[Mr. Sinister]

Men want sex from both women and T-girls. In that regards, men do not differentiate between T-girls and women. However, when it is time to bring home a girl to their mother and father, how many men want to hear their parents say " I had no idea my son was gay. He must be because he likes transsexuals." Much like the coming out stories of many transsexuals to their families, men who openly profess their love of their transsexual partner often fall vicitim to allienation from their own families. At least with a genetic girl, men do not have deal with this kind of tribulation from their own family.

[Supai]

Well its not the case for everyone. My family was a bigger road block than his. They were hardly ultra accepting according to him, but I guess after months of him being openly infatuated with me and his mother falling in love with me before having it come out too helped them be more sympathetic. Also cannot but assume him having an older brother who is already pumping out grandchildren with a good wife helped too. I doubt 90 year old grandma knows though.

[AceHole]

It is also true that most men that plan on having biological children will treat the potential mother of their children differently that a woman they are just "picking up." When it comes to transgendered women, there is that obstacle of no biological children that can cause many men to act differently towards them.

[sunairco]

"I read numerous threads started by T-girls complaining about men and how they are only interested in sex, and not a relationship. Males are biologically programmed because of testerone, which is a primary sex hormone, to want sex all the time. In general, men, Gay or Straight, think about sex almost every single day of their lives."

This makes the assumption that a Transwoman also experiences the contextual reality of a GG. Ancetodal evidence from reading postings by Transwomen and clinical sources would suggest otherwise. Gender dysphoria or HRT doesn't necessarly imply GG brain (re)organization. For example, does a Transwoman carry the accumulated emotional baggage that her GG sister does? Does the fundamental and primary psychobiological need change from being appreciated to being needed and cared for? Does sex change from an impulsive procreative primal drive to an deeper extention of an emotional state of feeling loved? To reduce this all of this down to a simple illustrive question. Would your attraction to a TG be the same if you had to put up with all the crap of GG ? Social issues aside, I suspect not.

" a cis gendered women"

Since when do GG's have a different stereoisomeric configuration then trans gendered women? Does this mean that TG's and GG's have chiral complimentary feminine shapes ? Will my polarized sunglasses allow me to differentiate the two ? Does that mean her ring becomes an aromatic once resonance stabalized ?

Fascinating.

[tstv_lover]

I really hate reading threads that seek to talk for ALL men and explain why the relationships with transsexual women is necessarily different from GG.

It isn't for me. I've have GG girlfriends and I've had transsexual girlfriends. I've lived with a GG in LTR and I've lived with a transsexual in LTR. We went out for dinner, drinks, parties etc and had great fun both in bed and out of it.

It's plain wrong to state why relationships with GGs and transsexuals are different. It's entirely up to you to decide what you want to make of the relationship. If you only want sex then accept that it's your decision - not the "fault" of the transsexual.