Zoe sometimes families suck. I feel where you are coming from. Having lived as a transwoman, then mostly gay man, now as a transwoman again I know from experience that "compromise" does not work. It could only leave you feeling cheated out of time in your life, and other consequences.

Sexuality and gender identity are totally separate things...they can and do influence one another in various ways but they are not "the same".

As for people who talk smack about your interest. Just tell them to fuck off.