Marriage of Convenience

[Ecstatic]

What the other sharks said! Peggy's idea of a prenup is excellent.

Sorry to hear about the header down the stairs. Guess I'd best give you a shout out while you're still walking upright, huh?

[BeardedOne]

From a sharks point of view though, bear in mind that no good deed goes unpunished.

As so often happens to me.

What the other sharks said! Peggy's idea of a prenup is excellent.

There would certainly be a raft of paperwork involved. We each own our own homes and would like to keep them and there is the inevitable concern about credit scores, etc. It's all just random thoughts right now, but research is in progress.

Sorry to hear about the header down the stairs.

Yah, if I hadn't cushioned the fall with my face I'd really be messed up. Various spots still ache a bit, but nothing was broken.

[biguy4tvtscd]

As a taxpayer (i.e. one of the many schmucks who will actually pay the money), I respectfully request that you do not game the system in such a way.

The ends may be noble, but the means are fraudulent.

In no uncertain terms, it puts you in the same league as insurance scam artists, you know...those people culpable for the extremely high health insurance rates in America.

[LoadedRevolver66]

From a sharks point of view though, bear in mind that no good deed goes unpunished.

As so often happens to me.

What the other sharks said! Peggy's idea of a prenup is excellent.

There would certainly be a raft of paperwork involved. We each own our own homes and would like to keep them and there is the inevitable concern about credit scores, etc. It's all just random thoughts right now, but research is in progress.

How old are you, B1? I don't know why, but I want to say you're 50-ish (maybe from another post?). Anyway, if you have another 20 years or so, my advice is you probably shouldn't. Yeah, there's prenup, but they can be challenged and if she changes her mind sometime down the road, it'll get ugly at a time when you really don't need that shit. If it gets beyond research, make sure you discuss prenups, paperwork, and assets with a VERY good lawyer, alone and without her. It helps to keep one card face down when you're making a gamble.

But aside from all the negative aspects, if it work out for both of you, then cheers mate!

[BeardedOne]

Actually it would be a very kind gesture, and if there was a heaven, you would probably be high enough up in hell to see it.

Thanks, Tonka. I like that reference, and will make note of it.

To those that have asked elsewhere, here is an update:

We had dinner tonite upon her return from a nice overseas vacation, during which she became distinctly aware that her friend/companion/guide was attempting to broker her and her US citizenship to the locals. Needless to say, she is furious, and rightly so.

And so the subject of marriage was discussed again. She is running the thought past an accountant and lawyer that she knows and I am running it by a lawyer and a person I know who is in a similar relationship already. Time will tell.

As a taxpayer (i.e. one of the many schmucks who will actually pay the money), I respectfully request that you do not game the system in such a way.

The ends may be noble, but the means are fraudulent.

While I understand your opinion and the intent of your post, you need to be reminded of one simple fact:

THIS IS MY MONEY!, not yours or the American taxpayers'.

It has absolutely =NOTHING= to do with tax revenues and =EVERYTHING= to do with the money that I have been paying into the system for the past forty-plus years. If I die and cannot bequeath the monies in some way, then, by your logic, I am cheating the system out of MY MONEY. Sorry, that plan doesn't wash.

In no uncertain terms, it puts you in the same league as insurance scam artists, you know...those people culpable for the extremely high health insurance rates in America.

I'm sure that, unlike Phillip & Catherine Lewis and their $175k settlement against Snappy Car Rental because his dick couldn't get hard a year after his accident, the fact that I am dead might be more evidentialy proved positive.

While some such as yourself may see this as a form of welfare fraud, it most certainly is not. We both work, we both paty taxes, we pay our bills, we both own property (Upon which we pay =more= taxes). Yet, in each of our situations, we are being punished in some form for being single.

I have been watching the gay marriage debacle with some interest because I have many, many friends that this is very important to, yet no one seems to have grasped the big picture: It is the people who are already granted the right to marriage and all of its related benefits who are receiving the 'special treatment' that is so often used as the battle cry against same-sex unions.

So, speaking from my fucking soapbox: Why am I, a single, white, middle-class, American, property-owning, tax-paying, 'straight' (The term is relative), male being discrimiated against by the blood/marriage relative property laws?



And why is my friend, a single, hard working, tax-paying, property-owning, American female, being told that she has to pay $400 a month for health and life benefits when she lives in the richest, most powerful nation on the planet?

[Barno]

Here's an interesting thought. Even though neither of you are wealthy at least from what I've read, you should get a pre-nuptial agreement. This way if it is just a passing fad and it turns out that she won't fuck you on any of the nights of the week let alone Tuesdays at least your income and any other assets are protected. You see if you stay together for a period of time or heaven forbid have a child she will get a healthy bite of your income as alimony or child support. A pre-nup will keep a divorce under control financially. Believe me it's worth the legal fee to get this agreement before you jump into the ocean.

[CORVETTEDUDE]

B1...My advice would be to seek 'independent counsel', someone both your advisors can refer you to, and has absolutely no connection to either of you, whatsoever. People you know CAN have their own agenda. Based on what you have stated, so far, I think there is a possibility your relationship could become stronger.

Retired Navy(26 yrs.), and looking for similar arrangements.

[PhillyTSlover]

Uhh...what happens if you meet a woman you're genuinely attracted to, and would like to have a relationship with? No woman (or T-Girl for that matter) will overlook a marriage, whether it be real or a marriage of convenience. Are you basically going to cut yourself off emotionally from dating/sex? What's the point of living?

[BeardedOne]

Follow up reply to Loaded Revolver (Damn, I so need one of those):

How old are you, B1? I don't know why, but I want to say you're 50-ish (maybe from another post?). Anyway, if you have another 20 years or so, my advice is you probably shouldn't. Yeah, there's prenup, but they can be challenged and if she changes her mind sometime down the road, it'll get ugly at a time when you really don't need that shit. If it gets beyond research, make sure you discuss prenups, paperwork, and assets with a VERY good lawyer, alone and without her. It helps to keep one card face down when you're making a gamble.

But aside from all the negative aspects, if it work out for both of you, then cheers mate!

Just coming on to the big Five-Oh. And I may not have the next 20 +/- years. Doing the basic genetic math (My Grandfather was 66, my dad 72 when they died) I am hoping for 78 as a minimum end game. Yet, headers down the stairs, random bullets from rogue cops (Brookline, 1977), and the average inept driver on the NJTP can cut this short at any moment.

We are looking at the prenups extensively and independently. I also have an inside track from a couple of directions: One being a couple who married for a combination of spousal benefits and for family security as they both wanted to have a child (I've met him, now about age 18, and he is the most incredibly gifted individual I have ever known while both his parents are gay - Bringing many challenges to the family relationship) and the other (Including the lawyer that will revue any prenup I might consider) being relatively affluent having deep experience with prenups and extensive spousal/joint estate planning.

At worst, it will all make for a good read.

[dan_drade]

I have to agree with Peggy. Prenup, Prenup, Prenup.
That said, if I were in your postition, I would find a nice Transexual woman to marry. I have known a few T-Girls, and the cost for medical tratment really adds up. I think it far exeeds the cost of your average GG, unless she is psyco and requires a lot of Xanax and shink appointments, you know the kind of girl I am talking about. And besides, there are way too many Transexuals out there with no medical insurance at all.
Anyway, in my opinion, it would be really great to help out a nice T-girl in that way.
Sheesh, I hope that didn't sound stupid.