Why I miss Joanna Jet

[Vicki Richter]

Joanna and I got into the adult video business at the same time. She and I costarred in Transsexual Beauty Queens 15. I believe it was both of our first videos. Joanna was always very pretty. However, like many other TS she constantly evolved and looked better. When Joanna made her first movie, Jet Set #1, she personally asked me to be in it with her. She was very insightful in the transsexual lesbian thing. Not only did she like it on screen, but she loved it off screen as well. She was one of the most sexual creatures I ever met... and I loved it.

I remember stolen moments and intense sexual attraction between us. She was always smiling when I first met her. She was driven and yet enjoying every moment of her life. It was a beautiful thing to behold.

Later, we we went on and made Brazen. Again this was a Joanna brainchild. Three scenes of the two of us getting into trouble. When Joanna and I did our 2way on the pool table, there was some guy up on a hill with binoculars looking into the expensive porn house she had rented. When we did the 4 way scene with two guys, it was her idea that she take a double anal. That was innovative for the time (even today in TS porn) and it shows the advanced perversions of the Europeans that she actually asked for it. The moans of pain and look on her face, I could only giggle. I couldn't believe she was doing this depraved act. It's taken me until 2007 to consider doing the same thing in a scene. Regardless, Brazen was a novel idea and a movie of it's like hasn't been shot since. Although we had diologue and hinted at the end of Brazen of their being a Brazen #2, it was never to be.

Later Joanna moved to L.A. It was at this time when I became more distant. I was dating a famous adult director at the time, and would continue to for a period of five years. Although I wanted to spend more time with her, it just wasn't possible for me where I was in my relationship. She had gone through some personal things in her life that she needed support with, and I wasn't able to be there for her. I regret that to this day. It was during this time that we shot another Jet Set. Joanna wanted everything to be decadent (as always). She had Crystal (however you spell it) and had spared no expense on location once again. We did what I felt at the time was the most passionate bathtub scene ever, but it never got the same acclaim that we received from Brazen.

A few years later, I spent 3-4 days during my first visit to NYC with Joanna. She also took me to my first lesbian bar - Henrietta Hudson. She stayed with me in my hotel room, and I recall us arguing about her smoking in the room. It was a small thing, but it wasn't the best way to see someone off. We both had a very hard time that trip for various but very different reasons. She had lost a close friend, and I just struggled with the NYC/East coast thing. I think it was the beginning of the end for our friendship although I still don't know why. I had embarassed her at Allanah's party, she had left with me at close to 2am and then attempted to do damage control the following day. I still think I was slipped something to this day.

The next time I saw Joanna was in AZ. We were supposed to do a lot of fun things together, but she got sick. She was attending an Internet expo and had some bad food. Still I went to her and picked her up and brought her back to my house. I wanted to show her that I had done well for myself I guess. At one point, during the long drive through the desert to my house, she commented on thinking I was driving her into the middle of nowhere to kill her. It was silly of course, but I can imagine how someone might think that... It is a long drive in the middle of nowhere. We discussed things like the AVN award. We drank tea together on my couch and spent much time outside in the warm breezy evening. I am sure it was not very good tea by a Brit's standards, but it was what I had.

The last time I saw Joanna was at 7969 probably 2 years ago. She initially was ignoring me, but I seduced her on to the dance floor. We shared passionate kisses all night. She told me how much I had hurt her by distancing myself from our friendship. What could I say? I was wrong. I never tried to hurt her in that way. It is just what I do.

I haven't seen her since, but I think of her. She and I shared much more in common than I have shared with practically any other TS. We had some very clear and obvious differences, and she was much more wild than me, but that never stopped people from being close. It was an honest friendship of give and take, but, in the end, I just wasn't there when she had needed me.

[Marinus]

Good God! It sounds like an obituary ...

[Alison Faraday]

I like that. Well written with feeling.

[Gus_gunn]

I've seen those seen and they are amazing, I don't know about your friendship but I'm sure you need to get in touch with her, no matter how cathartic it is to write about her I'm sure its even more so to talk to her. Time is a great healer but can also be a barrier.

[Cyclops]

Sounds like both of you have friendly feelings for each other

perhaps you should make an effort to maintain your friendship

try to get in contact with her , and then keep the connection goimg ,by whatever means works (phone calls, letters ,emails or maybe get together once in a while)

if she felt hurt that you had let the relationship go ,maybe you can make her feel better by keeping in contact with her

no matter how busy your schedule may be ,always make some time for friends

[GroobySteven]

At one point, during the long drive through the desert to my house, she commented on thinking I was driving her into the middle of nowhere to kill her.

I was wondering why she hadn't called me for a while. The last I heard of Olivia Love, Brandy Scott and Lisa Lawrence, they were taking the same drive ...
seanchai

[harri10]

the brazen stuff done between joanna and vicki is the BEST stuff ever produced. I hope you make up.

[Azanti]

Vicki

I hope she reads this, I have to admit I thought I was about to read that she was dead at the end of all that and was thinking, please god know.

It is so much better to say these things when there is an actual chance for them to have impact and meaning to the person concerned. I don't think you could have articulated your feelings any better.

Write her a letter with a copy of this in it and post it, you know, the old fashioned way. Emails are easy, posting a letter requires more effort and thought, it consequently has more meaning to someone.

I wish you the best, whatever you do. This post has given me a whole new insight into you, thanks for having the guts and courage to share it with us.

[LoadedRevolver66]

I'm shocked...that's the first time something actually touched me on HA.

Aside from that, my two cents is that you should somehow reconnect with Joanna, I know a few people said it already and you said yourself it was a matter of not being there for her when she needed you, but it doesn't sound broken. There's a lot to this I don't know - I'm sure its more complicated than a single post - but a friendship like that's worth reclaiming.

[MonsieurValentine]

as the world turns...