Love and Lust

[Vicki Richter]

Personally, I like it when people disagree with me.

I think you left off a fourth kind of person on the board. The spammers. This has become more and more rampant. They come in and post a few hundred images relating to different nationality TS and/or body parts, and they are done for the day. What useless web site hawking bullshit is that?

Regardless, and not to lose the topic, I just feel that within the sex industry as a whole... I omitted the simple fact that even female pornstar sex workers struggle to maintain relationships. There is this double standard for a sex worker typically which says, "you can't fuck other girls, but I get to fuck everyone I want because that's my job". That is bullshit. If I have sex with a bunch of people, he can too. As long as neither of us brings any surprises home, I think that's fair.

There is a type of man I have found who finds it erotic that the girl he dates fucks other men while he remains faithful, and he might even want to watch. There are also men who don't care if their girl whores as long as it supports the household. However, if we want a typical family oriented household or the American relationship dream, neither of those are going to work.

Sex work is souless work. The people involved in it lose themselves somewhere and it becomes hollow. Girls come in here a lot complaining about the relationship thing or lack of ability to maintain something in that respect. However, TS outside of the industry do meet and maintain relationships sometimes. I guess for my own peace of mind, I want to know a TS girl in the sex industry can have a LTR. Am I forever tainted because of what I've done? Again, I view this as a sex worker thing almost more than a TS sex worker thing. I know a lot of porn girls, and none of them are in healthy happy relationships. In fact, they seem to have an even harder time because they are more recognizable by a larger male population.

V

[LCF]

I'd like to think that if you really want it enough, you can have it Vicki.
I don't mean to disrespect any of the girls working in the industry, but it might be not just that they were involved in the industry that makes it hard for them to have meaningfull relationships, but I'm sure its a factor. It could be that the same kind of person who goes into that field could also be the same kind of person who has difficulty having a healthy relationship.
From the way I've heard it described primarily on these forums, it's not the kind of work I'd wish on anybody.
Then again, I could be coming from way left field.

[yodajazz]

You have all said some intelligent things in this thread, even though it started with a complaint about the lack of it. But responding to Vicki’s last post, it is difficult for any women in the sex industry to have a relationship while she is still in, but she can always leave and it will eventually make a big difference.

I once was close with an exotic dancer, but chose not to pursue the relationship, when I heard some ‘friends’ talking about her sexually. I later came to understand their comments as immature fantasizing. I am mature enough to understand that now, but not at the time. You will find an emotionally mature man. Time is actually on your side.

I personally am married, but not in a happy state, right now. I wonder if I had had that ltr with a trans could I have been happier today. I that time I was dating, the ones I met were to into the ‘street life’, whereas I am a college graduate. I have loved them my entire life, as well as gg’s. I just except it now as a part of myself, whether I express it outwardly or not.

For me this board allows me to have fantasies and share them with people who might understand them. I will defend those who ‘attack’ our girls (or women) because I love them, while others in society look down on them. Meanwhile I have come to understand that my fantasies give me ‘life’, and hope to continue to experience life. Like everything else fantasy can have a negative side, by interferring in acomplishing real life tasks. But some fantasies do become real. Like I say in my latest song; “All of reality was once only someone’s fantasy.” The women here are living proof of that.

[hondarobot]

I would agree that many, the majority honestly, of people in the "erotic industry" do find it difficult to find and maintain a close relationship. I know a lot of strippers, have known (as friends) many escorts, and I can't think of one of those girls ever finding true love at any point. The problem usually is on both sides. The girls want some "bad boy" stunt cock kinda guy, and the guys want a sex fantasy. Sport fucking only lasts so long between two people and then they drift apart looking for new adventures.

A guy outside the industry would have to be pretty devoted, unique, and not be too uptight about the sexual appetite a girl in, or formerly in, the business would posess. Ideally, he'd have to be interested in everything about a girl, but not just view her as the realization of a sexual fantasy. She's gonna want to have sex with other people on occassion, and he'd probably make the trade off that sometimes he'd get to sit around, relax and watch the History channel while drinking some beers and smoking cigarettes.

He probably wouldn't want to hear about her occasional sex antics, I can't imagine he'd want to watch them (unless it was with another hot girl, no guy would pass that up), the two people would just have to discuss things some day and arrive at a compromise of sorts.

Love can always find a way to work things out, as long as the people are meant for each other. It just takes patience and confidence that things will come together.

[dj4monie]

You have all said some intelligent things in this thread, even though it started with a complaint about the lack of it. But responding to Vicki’s last post, it is difficult for any women in the sex industry to have a relationship while she is still in, but she can always leave and it will eventually make a big difference.

I once was close with an exotic dancer, but chose not to pursue the relationship, when I heard some ‘friends’ talking about her sexually. I later came to understand their comments as immature fantasizing. I am mature enough to understand that now, but not at the time. You will find an emotionally mature man. Time is actually on your side.

I personally am married, but not in a happy state, right now. I wonder if I had had that ltr with a trans could I have been happier today. I that time I was dating, the ones I met were to into the ‘street life’, whereas I am a college graduate. I have loved them my entire life, as well as gg’s. I just except it now as a part of myself, whether I express it outwardly or not.

For me this board allows me to have fantasies and share them with people who might understand them. I will defend those who ‘attack’ our girls (or women) because I love them, while others in society look down on them. Meanwhile I have come to understand that my fantasies give me ‘life’, and hope to continue to experience life. Like everything else fantasy can have a negative side, by interferring in acomplishing real life tasks. But some fantasies do become real. Like I say in my latest song; “All of reality was once only someone’s fantasy.” The women here are living proof of that.

Alot of people in the adult industry are mis-adjusted. But then again, so are alot of "normal" people and they make bad bedfellows as well. Its basically a crap shoot, unless you understand your needs and seperate them from your desires. Desire gets in the way all too often and clouds judgement to the point that you no longer think straight.

I could handle a relationship with an adult performer, I believe I have said that before. Its profession. Why does a career have to be a horrible job you hate going too everyday? I look at the sex trade the same way. Women control the industry, they either love it (Nina Hartley, Ginger Lynn, etc) or hate it and leave soon after.

There was an interview with Heather Hunter once and she was asked how hard was it to date. She said, it was hard to tell if the guy was dating Heather Hunter - The Porn Star and just want to fuck her, or Heather Hunter - The Woman.

There alot of short-sighted men out there. Insercure themselves and project that into their relationships.

It seems the question for most men comes up while dating a performer is when is she going to leave the industry. This is why alot of performers seldom find happiness outside the industry. Why should she give up her career for your personally peace of mind?

As they said in Super Chicken - "You knew the job was dangerous when you took it"

If you knew the girl was in the sex trade and you were unconfortable with that fact, then why did you waste her time? Makes no sense...

Go marry some school teacher someplace, I think your mother would OKAY with that and so will 99% of your friends and family.

I don't understand why so many married men make their way into sites like this. It seems to me you made a poor choice once, what's to stop you from doing it again?

My .02

[whatsupwithat]

So many of you want to suck my shecock and swallow everything that comes out of me... over and over every day of you lives. Don't you hate wishing and wanting? You want that feeling. You want to feel someone beautiful loves you.

Instead all of you are posting spam in here about meaningless "cum shots" or "big shemale cocks"... I mean what the fuck is that. You will just be fucking wanting it a year from now... 5 years from now... the rest of your lives.

I mean really why don't you do something about it? This forum has become pic collectors heaven and the good guys who started this site have left. Megabody almost never posts. This isn't what it was. You guys can post pictures and fantasize, but there are real TS girls who want what you want. Most of you are chicken shit and scared to take what is there. Fuck those of you who fantasize about us but wouldn't risk loving us. Fuck the girls who are so jaded they won't give you a chance.

I want a love story. I want to hear a TS and a guy made it and it was real. I need that. I want to know that what my parents and grandparents can happen to me and my friends. You might want to jack off wishing her cock was deep inside you, but until you really say it and mean it, and

Vicki

It happens. I was in a 13 year relationship with a ts. We lived together and loved together. And although the relationship (like any relationship) didn't work out in the end, today we are best friends.

Chicken shit, Vicki? Not me. I don't visit the working girls for sex. Instead, I've been looking for someone to love and share my life with. I'm ready. But finding a girl who's ready is not easy.

I could go on and on about the myriad of reasons for this, but the blame lies both on the girls side and the guys side.

If there's a girl out there on this board that's reading this, click on my myspace profile below. I don't bite. I'm basically just a nice guy looking for what we're all looking for. Love, trust, and an open and honest relationship with one person.

[whatsupwithat]

Sex work is souless work. The people involved in it lose themselves somewhere and it becomes hollow.

V

Something the younger girls need to hear and the guys who make it possible need to understand.

much peace and love, vicki. much peace and love.

[needsum]

Hey Vicki,

I just wanted to say that I hear you--I think that a lot of guys will be using this as a fantasy board, and will never do anything real in their actual lives.

And actually, I am one of them, to a degree. If I may explain . . .

I am married, and like every guy on this board, I admire, enjoy, feel sexually charged by transsexual women. For me, the realization didn't come until I was well into my relationship with my wife. I had never known or seen a TS woman until the internet became readily available, so my exposure level was nil to that point.

Several years ago I started to explore my sexuality without my wife, because while we're still very much in love and happy, our sex life is bland and doesn't have too much hope of improving (she is not very into exploration or kink). Through this experimentation with swing sites and escorting sites, I discovered my attraction to TS women.

I took that leap and met a beautiful woman, had an amazing encounter that forever changed my life. I felt, at that moment, that there were no boundaries between myself and this woman, and that if my situation was different I would have no problem falling in love with her and giving her everything I had to give.

But, I already have that with my wife. Some days when I see that woman I met those years ago, I think how amazing it would be to wake up with her in my arms every morning. I have no hang-ups about the fact that she was in the adult industry, though to be honest I would not want her to stay in it if we were making a life together. If things should ever change with me and I find myself single, I feel, in my heart, that I could honestly love a ts as much as I could a gg. But for now, this board and places like it are the only outlet I have for sharing and enjoying my passions for transsexual women. I certainly don't go so far as to say things like "I wanna suck the cum out of your jewcock" because to me that shit is highly offensive and demeaning to the woman. But I do enjoy the pictures, and the space to speak my mind, debate, admire, and just be a part of this community in some tiny, albeit insignificant way.

So don't give up Vicki, you are beautiful and soulful, and I know that you will be able to find someone who will hold you tight and let you know that you have found everything you are looking for in this life. I know this because if I feel that strongly, there have to be others who feel the same way.

[blahblahblah]

A porn star who made quite many porn movies, who proudly made a gangbang scene with kind of 15 unknown guys (publicly),
escorting, and who else knows what more besides that - wants now to be loved, supported and pleased like a princess by some
ordinary good guy, who will ultimately be willing to if necessity demands it sacrify a lot (for example - his family life in some cases,
probably his social status as well, etc..) for that purpose. Well, that guy must be a real hero, some silly superman kind of..
I dunno, i really dunno any more

[Vicki Richter]

I think marriage is a bit overrated. I realize I am going all over the place here. But marriage in the traditional sense almost 100% of the time turns into her not wanting sex anymore and him feeling rejected going off and cheating. Then, although she doesn't want sex with him anymore, she goes off and cheats too because that sex is new. A lot of times women resent their husbands for making them pregnant and giving up their freedom, other times, they just put all their energy into children and lose the bond that brought them together.

I would think, because we can't have kids, a life with a transsexual would be more fulfilling. The couple would always focus on each other, fun with each other, knowing each other, sex with each other. Cumming over and over. Orgasms, anal sex, french kissing, oral sex, etc.

I don't get the married and unhappy thing either. So many people divorce. But then there are these people who live in a constant state of numbness who never divorce until they are old. They do it "for the kids". Sure that is self sacrificing and noble, but honestly give up 20 years of your life "for the kids"?? In the meantime you aren't fantasizing about your wife anymore, you are fantasizing about pornstars, transsexuals, bondage, lesbians, gay men and/or sex with farm animals. Everything your wife isn't, you make into a fantasy.

So my argument would be that you cut your losses, pay your child support, and then find your fantasy girl. Whether she is a shemale, a dominatrix or a sheep, that is up to you.

The things I like about a relationship is getting to know someone and getting to know their family, likes, dislikes, and making them happy. You can't get that by dating 10 different guys. Maybe the best relationship would be some form of polygomous open relationship. Most married guys are doing that now anyway, just without her knowing about it. Maybe that is why being a pornstar is a good thing. As long as I do it, I can't be jealous about a guy I am with fucking other girls. I would dump him if I found out he did a guy though. I think that's gross... that or farm animals.

Vicki