Fetlife

[phillyguy21]

I hate the "Antarctica" broads on there, and the "don't friend request me unless we've met at a munch" chicks, too. Fetlife is a place where cis women are even more self-important than normal, and that's saying a lot.

[smoothboi]

There's a lot of truth in that. Tons of findommes. I don't mind if they don't want people to friend them unless they've met. They probably get inundated with dumb dude friend requests. Just go to a munch. I've been to plenty.

The Antarctica is dumb af though. Just put the closest major city. And if you want that much anonymity, then why are you there?

[fla_funmeister2]

I like fetlife! It's like a kinky version of facebook without the overlords watching & manipulating what you see!

It's a great place to find local kinky people & events too..

Are you on there?

[AlexisDVyne]

Are you on there?

Of course.. I'm Alexis_D_Vyne on fetlife..

[smoothboi]

Funny since I posted that above I got two more messages cold 'are you ready to submit to me?' No, bitch what you mean is submit my wallet so fuck off. Thanks for not reading anything on my profile.

[thickmotherfucker]

i just joined - so fetlife is useless for guys then?

[phillyguy21]

i just joined - so fetlife is useless for guys then?

For the most part, but not entirely... I actually did get laid from there after several years of being a member.

However, 99% of women on fetlife are there for pure attention. The site intentionally makes it hard for men, because you can't really do targeted searches. That fact, combined with the idea that it is a "kink/fetish" site, brings out all of the attention whores. Also, the only kink most of those women are into is being tied up and beaten. There are way more fetishes than just BDSM. I have a lot of kinks, and the vast majority of them have nothing to do with BDSM.

People will tell you, "just go to events", but BDSM events are SHIT. I've attended alone, and I've attended with my Latina BBW girlfriend. Either way, the events are shit. Many BDSM parties do not even allow sex, but you can be naked, beat the fuck out of each other, and even play with fire & knives. They are very cliquey, and they police you way too much. I always imagined that BDSM people would be less judgmental than swingers. That couldn't be further from the truth. The swinger parties I've been to have been more welcoming and wayyy more fun.

All in all, there's no harm in having an account. I still have mine, and I log on from time to time. However, don't have high expectations.

[RACQUEL]

On there and have Hooked up with a few FUCKTASTIC peeps! Tgurls+BBC. Most on there are BS, you have to work to find the players!

[smoothboi]

I've made some friends. One was actually in my area but still wasn't keen on just hanging out, but nbd. I've gone to plenty of munches and made new friends, so I do like that.

I haven't been to the 'event's per se, but I agree it seems like there's a lot of rules. Over here, they're at someone's house, so I can get that they'd want to be careful.

When I was in SF I went to Folsom with people I've met off fetlife.

I'd say to be clear on your profile. When you do meet people irl, they're going to look at it and want to see some details, not just the 'i'm just here to check it out.'