sexuality and gender - new categories

[smoothboi]

I've been referring to myself as queer for a while.

[Billy Blueballs]

To my (simple) mind there are two categories of sexuality.
Straight
Not straight
I think sometimes the need to categorising the many versions of Not Straight can be quite distructive.
Not Straight is (arguably) a minority already without sub dividing it into ever smaller groups.

Out of curiosity then, what defines "straight"?
If a guy fucks his (GG) partner in the ass, is he still "straight"? Not according to some people.
What if he's never been with a guy, never thought of men in a sexual way ever, but likes it when his (GG) partner massages his prostate? Still "straight"?
What if he likes his (still GG) partner to shove a vibrating dildo up his ass because it feels amazing and he loves the feeling of being submissive to his (yep, still GG) partner?
I could carry these examples on and on, but the point is, there's a mindset of uber-straight conservative men that would consider any of the above "not straight", even if the guy in question has no sexual attraction to males whatsoever.

The need to label everything into A or B is part of why society is so ludicrously divided

[Aticus100]

Out of curiosity then, what defines "straight"?
If a guy fucks his (GG) partner in the ass, is he still "straight"? Not according to some people.
What if he's never been with a guy, never thought of men in a sexual way ever, but likes it when his (GG) partner massages his prostate? Still "straight"?
What if he likes his (still GG) partner to shove a vibrating dildo up his ass because it feels amazing and he loves the feeling of being submissive to his (yep, still GG) partner?
I could carry these examples on and on, but the point is, there's a mindset of uber-straight conservative men that would consider any of the above "not straight", even if the guy in question has no sexual attraction to males whatsoever.

The need to label everything into A or B is part of why society is so ludicrously divided

Nope. The need to label everything into A or B is why society is divided.

The need to label everything into A,B,C,D,D+,D+A, Pan-D and D curious/questioning is why society is ludicrously divided.

To answer your question I don't think it matters what a male does with a female, society will consider this "straight".

Iv'e been straight all my life until my met my GF who I am attracted to entirely as a result of her femininity and although so gay doesn't fit for me, nor does bi or any other variation.

Hence I am happy to consider myself "Not Straight" and not care what other wish to call me.

[Ponyboy]

I think division comes when you have an 'us or them' situation, but when you recognise that there are a whole lot of variations in sexuality, (or many different types of normality), it reduces the sense that there is one normality, and every one else is different.

[Aticus100]

Where I would suggest that falls down is that we only seem to be further deviding one side of the "Us and them".
To "Straight" people the endlessly increasing variation of people who are "Not straight" just seems like a bizarre race to be ever more exclusive which can only make it easier to marginalise people further.

[Laphroaig]

I'll leave you with the wisdom of Sinista...

I would say straight,On top of it there isn't shit straight about this lifestyle @ fuckin all

All clear now?...

[Ponyboy]

Your comments are so logical that I read them and think 'they are right, I am wrong'. But then I go away and think about it, and I think I am not completely wrong and we are both right.

My first thought is that I agree that we should ignore categories, and just get on and have fun, but the truth is, self perception is important. People do analyse and define themselves.

For example, whenever this issue is raised, it is by someone who is 'straight' but discovers they like cock. So, if we only have two options, they have to think I am straight or gay? In which case, they do not explicilty fit either category (hence their post).

I personally think most people are not 'straight' and have some form of variation, which if they were allowed to acknowledge, would make them more tolerent of other people's variations.

Also, some people because of socialisation define themselves as straight when they are growing up but ignore their own personal characteritics which clearly suggest otherwise.

I think one of the new categories I suggested is very important. Today, if you have a feminine essense the logical conclusion is to become a Tgirl, but this creates huge complications in life, and it is not just because of discrimination. You can still live a feminine life, faithful to who you are, without transitioning. I think this is a good life option that can provide much happiness.

But I also agree that you are right in that it would be nice of we could leave all definitions behind and just get on with life. I agree with the people criticising my views, but I also think there is logic in what I am saying.

[Aticus100]

I can certainly see the logic in what you are saying and at the end of the day, there is no right or wrong in this subject as it's just our own opinions.
What I would say is that where you mention if there were only two disriptives (straight and gay) then most will identify as straight, if the two discriptives were Straight and not Straight then surely far more would identify as Not Straight. It also means that people don't need to choose which category of Not Straight they fall into and worry about all the further discriminations that come with it.
I, for example, am not gay. I don't fancy guys or masculinity one little bit so not Bi either. Definitely not trans and obviously not lesbian. I'm not Pan-anything or Q-anything either.
But I will tell you am. I'm definitely Not Straight.

[filghy2]

It also means that people don't need to choose which category of Not Straight they fall into and worry about all the further discriminations that come with it.

Sorry, but I don't get it. I don't think that straight people inclined to such discrimination care what label you choose to attach to yourself. All that matters to them is that you're not an 'Us', ie outside of what they regard as normal.

[trish]

Okay, let's sub-categorize the majority then.

Category 1: Those who are okay with others when they give appropriate expression to their own gender or their own sexual orientation or when they give appropriate public expression to their love for another.

Category 2: Those who aren't.
Subcategory 2.1: Those who aren't there yet. They're still uncomfortable but are getting over it.
Subcategory 2.2: Those who aren't and are never likely to be comfortable with gender and sexual diversity within their society.
Subcategory2.3: Those who are categorically opposed to the expression of identities other than their own.