Advice on confession to wife.

[kevmart87]

Treating us like a dirty little secret (that you need to confess to, whether you do or don't) is both a huge turn-off and very cringey. Your wife is feeling that too. There's no denying that your little head had some input on this, but in reality the average person feels cucked as fuck finding out their partner gets off on other people. Not sure why you expected anything else.

Your right I understand her angle in this. I should of told her when we first started to get serious, but I choose not to put of fear that she would leave me. After seeing her reaction, she would of definitely left me. I didn't like keeping it a secret, yet a lot of society (including my wife) thinks very negatively. She sent me pics and videos of pasable TS and said why do you like two watch two men have sex. For about two hours I defended that TS are women. She just doesnt get it and doesn't want to. I'm not sure why I'm even trying to convince her to be alittle more enlightened about sexual identity. Its hard to hear my wife say such offensive things about TS.

This is why I held it back, not because I was ashamed but because my wife will never understand and I knew it would devistate her. I get that I hurt her badly, but I had no idea she was capable of such close minded and arrogant thinking.

Reguardless, I am not the victim here, but the perpetrator.

[tacocorpv2]

Marriage Contract... should have been done. At the end of the day this will serve as a good lesson to you and possibly to other men too. I feel sorry for both of you (you & wife) Hopefully you can solve this situation.

[nysprod]

Marriage Contract... should have been done. At the end of the day this will serve as a good lesson to you and possibly to other men too. I feel sorry for both of you (you & wife) Hopefully you can solve this situation.

The only solution for this situation is for the parties to move on.

[tsluvus]

I read the entire thread and first I think it is very IRRESPONSIBLE of those suggesting he just divorces his wife. Divorce is NOT a fun thing.
It is obvious to me that you do care and love your wife but you have desires/fantasies in being with a T-girl.

From experience, I am married and my wife had suspicion that I was having an affair. I decided to fess up and told her I was having an affair for 1 year with Marcinha de Belem while I was living in Brazil. This was not a paid per service sexual thing but it was a very emotional affair, we would go out to dinner, hang out, talk on the phone for hours.

My wife is Gorgeous, Very sexual, naughty, kinky, loves anal, everything a guy would want in a woman sexually but she had some temperamental issues as well.

When I told her, she was very sad, told me if you love you don't cheat, that she would never do it, etc... She was destroyed because she was so open sexually she would be willing to bring a t-girl for us to play with.

But for as much as I was involved with Marcinha, I did love my wife and I was NOT ready to leave her. So we eventually worked things out but as I found out now almost 3 years later it has had its drawbacks.
She did take revenge on me and had herself a few nights with other guys.
I expected it because she wanted to hurt me so I could feel what she did, but as must as I got upset it didn't hurt me, because of our sexual relationship we've played in 3somes before. She wanted me to be hurt, so I played along but i wasn't hurt but I really was upset because she said she would never do it and she would never degrade herself - so to me she just lied (I know pot kettle black).
More often than not now during fights she will call me a cock sucker, closet fag, shemale slut... It would get me really at angry at first but now I tune it out and I decided to understand that she was hurt by it so from time to time she lashes out.

I love t-girls, I get really turned on by a t-girl.
The person that commented about 90% of them being paid, drugs, have issues, etc... You are clueless. I have met many amazing t-grils in my lifetime now. And there are 2 or 3 that I would date and marry in a heartbeat. But all were at the wrong time in my life and one was living in italy at the time.

My suggestion to you is since this is just a fantasy as of right now, GO TRY ONE!!!
You SHOULD NEVER leave your wife over a fantasy without tasting it first.
Meet one, take her out to dinner, have fun in bed, kiss her, talk to her...
Also figure it out what you want.
Ask yourself this, would you be ashamed to be seen in public with a t-girl? If you are than NEVER leave your wife. You can still jerk off and even have an encounter here and there to satisfy your craving.

Today I am very secure of myself that if I ever end up divorcing my wife I would date only T-girls. Women are very emotional beings and will use whatever information you fess up to against you - telling the truth will only get you so far in some cases.
And I know with a T-girl you have other issues to deal with.

Peace

[gaysian71]

I read the entire thread and first I think it is very IRRESPONSIBLE of those suggesting he just divorces his wife. Divorce is NOT a fun thing.
It is obvious to me that you do care and love your wife but you have desires/fantasies in being with a T-girl.

From experience, I am married and my wife had suspicion that I was having an affair. I decided to fess up and told her I was having an affair for 1 year with Marcinha de Belem while I was living in Brazil. This was not a paid per service sexual thing but it was a very emotional affair, we would go out to dinner, hang out, talk on the phone for hours.

My wife is Gorgeous, Very sexual, naughty, kinky, loves anal, everything a guy would want in a woman sexually but she had some temperamental issues as well.

When I told her, she was very sad, told me if you love you don't cheat, that she would never do it, etc... She was destroyed because she was so open sexually she would be willing to bring a t-girl for us to play with.

But for as much as I was involved with Marcinha, I did love my wife and I was NOT ready to leave her. So we eventually worked things out but as I found out now almost 3 years later it has had its drawbacks.
She did take revenge on me and had herself a few nights with other guys.
I expected it because she wanted to hurt me so I could feel what she did, but as must as I got upset it didn't hurt me, because of our sexual relationship we've played in 3somes before. She wanted me to be hurt, so I played along but i wasn't hurt but I really was upset because she said she would never do it and she would never degrade herself - so to me she just lied (I know pot kettle black).
More often than not now during fights she will call me a cock sucker, closet fag, shemale slut... It would get me really at angry at first but now I tune it out and I decided to understand that she was hurt by it so from time to time she lashes out.

I love t-girls, I get really turned on by a t-girl.
The person that commented about 90% of them being paid, drugs, have issues, etc... You are clueless. I have met many amazing t-grils in my lifetime now. And there are 2 or 3 that I would date and marry in a heartbeat. But all were at the wrong time in my life and one was living in italy at the time.

My suggestion to you is since this is just a fantasy as of right now, GO TRY ONE!!!
You SHOULD NEVER leave your wife over a fantasy without tasting it first.
Meet one, take her out to dinner, have fun in bed, kiss her, talk to her...
Also figure it out what you want.
Ask yourself this, would you be ashamed to be seen in public with a t-girl? If you are than NEVER leave your wife. You can still jerk off and even have an encounter here and there to satisfy your craving.

Today I am very secure of myself that if I ever end up divorcing my wife I would date only T-girls. Women are very emotional beings and will use whatever information you fess up to against you - telling the truth will only get you so far in some cases.
And I know with a T-girl you have other issues to deal with.

Peace

Wow, you and the OP are a joke. I hope you realize that you and him not only broke your wives hearts. But then after their hearts were broken, you ripped them out. That my friend makes you a joke. And if you don't understand how you could have both broken your wife's heart and the ripped it out. Then you are very dense as well.

The fact of the matter is that men who are attracted to trans women will never be truly happy being married to a genetic woman. The desire to be with a trans woman will never fade. It's not like it's just some phase you are going through that will pass with time. It's something that will always be with you for the rest of your life.

I would advise that both of you get a divorce and find a nice trans woman to settle down with. I promise you will be a happy man. Right now you and the OP are just making your lives miserable. And not only are you making your life miserable, you're making your spouse's life miserable.

[KelliBlueEyes]

Wow, you and the OP are a joke. I hope you realize that you and him not only broke your wives hearts. But then after their hearts were broken, you ripped them out. That my friend makes you a joke. And if you don't understand how you could have both broken your wife's heart and the ripped it out. Then you are very dense as well.

The fact of the matter is that men who are attracted to trans women will never be truly happy being married to a genetic woman. The desire to be with a trans woman will never fade. It's not like it's just some phase you are going through that will pass with time. It's something that will always be with you for the rest of your life.

I would advise that both of you get a divorce and find a nice trans woman to settle down with. I promise you will be a happy man. Right now you and the OP are just making your lives miserable. And not only are you making your life miserable, you're making your spouse's life miserable.

Gaysian71 I love you

[nysprod]

Gaysian71 I love you

I love you both

[kevmart87]

I read the entire thread and first I think it is very IRRESPONSIBLE of those suggesting he just divorces his wife. Divorce is NOT a fun thing.
It is obvious to me that you do care and love your wife but you have desires/fantasies in being with a T-girl.

From experience, I am married and my wife had suspicion that I was having an affair. I decided to fess up and told her I was having an affair for 1 year with Marcinha de Belem while I was living in Brazil. This was not a paid per service sexual thing but it was a very emotional affair, we would go out to dinner, hang out, talk on the phone for hours.

My wife is Gorgeous, Very sexual, naughty, kinky, loves anal, everything a guy would want in a woman sexually but she had some temperamental issues as well.

When I told her, she was very sad, told me if you love you don't cheat, that she would never do it, etc... She was destroyed because she was so open sexually she would be willing to bring a t-girl for us to play with.

But for as much as I was involved with Marcinha, I did love my wife and I was NOT ready to leave her. So we eventually worked things out but as I found out now almost 3 years later it has had its drawbacks.
She did take revenge on me and had herself a few nights with other guys.
I expected it because she wanted to hurt me so I could feel what she did, but as must as I got upset it didn't hurt me, because of our sexual relationship we've played in 3somes before. She wanted me to be hurt, so I played along but i wasn't hurt but I really was upset because she said she would never do it and she would never degrade herself - so to me she just lied (I know pot kettle black).
More often than not now during fights she will call me a cock sucker, closet fag, shemale slut... It would get me really at angry at first but now I tune it out and I decided to understand that she was hurt by it so from time to time she lashes out.

I love t-girls, I get really turned on by a t-girl.
The person that commented about 90% of them being paid, drugs, have issues, etc... You are clueless. I have met many amazing t-grils in my lifetime now. And there are 2 or 3 that I would date and marry in a heartbeat. But all were at the wrong time in my life and one was living in italy at the time.

My suggestion to you is since this is just a fantasy as of right now, GO TRY ONE!!!
You SHOULD NEVER leave your wife over a fantasy without tasting it first.
Meet one, take her out to dinner, have fun in bed, kiss her, talk to her...
Also figure it out what you want.
Ask yourself this, would you be ashamed to be seen in public with a t-girl? If you are than NEVER leave your wife. You can still jerk off and even have an encounter here and there to satisfy your craving.

Today I am very secure of myself that if I ever end up divorcing my wife I would date only T-girls. Women are very emotional beings and will use whatever information you fess up to against you - telling the truth will only get you so far in some cases.
And I know with a T-girl you have other issues to deal with.

Peace

Thanks for the reply, I really appreciate your support and understanding.

I won't try a Tgirl as long as I'm with my wife. I could never do it as it would tear her apart and myself. However, I fear she may go seek revenge for all my years of masturbating and Tgirl attraction. If that happens then either; A) she will buy me a Tgirl for the night (ludicrous I know) if she wants to salvage the relationship or B) divorce her for cheating. Currently I don't think she has taken revenge or plans on it, I think she wants to try and save this relationship.

Wow, you and the OP are a joke. I hope you realize that you and him not only broke your wives hearts. But then after their hearts were broken, you ripped them out. That my friend makes you a joke. And if you don't understand how you could have both broken your wife's heart and the ripped it out. Then you are very dense as well.

The fact of the matter is that men who are attracted to trans women will never be truly happy being married to a genetic woman. The desire to be with a trans woman will never fade. It's not like it's just some phase you are going through that will pass with time. It's something that will always be with you for the rest of your life.

I would advise that both of you get a divorce and find a nice trans woman to settle down with. I promise you will be a happy man. Right now you and the OP are just making your lives miserable. And not only are you making your life miserable, you're making your spouse's life miserable.

I could of kept this from my wife but she caught me years ago and I lied that it went away. It was not easy to come clean and yea I tore her heart open and continue to hurt her as I refuse to lie and promise her that Ill get over Tgirls.

Getting a divorce and finding a nice trans woman to settle down is not easy and nor should it be the first solution.

I can be stronger then that. I will try my hardest to suppress my trans desires and win my wife back.

[fred41]

You never mentioned children. Do you have any... or plan on having them? How many years are you married now? These are important questions when it comes to a relationship such as marriage. I really think you should go see a licensed therapist (not a marriage counselor) ...it very well could help with some of your problems and will also help guide you in making the right decision.

What is the deal with the potential alimony you mentioned? Does she have a job at all or is she a stay at home mom?...Also, try to remember that staying together simply to honor an oath will not help either one of you if things just get worse.
If there are no children involved and you are both still young, it is often better to break up and give you each a chance with a better match down the road, instead of dealing with a sexless marriage that may be filled with distrust and constant bickering.

[nysprod]

I will try my hardest to suppress my trans desires and win my wife back.

Ridiculous. It'll never work. The only possible outcome will be that both of you end up more miserable than you are now.