My new trans dating book is available now

https://www.amazon.com/Chasing-Start.../dp/B0929GCP9R

Hope it helps ❤️

Kelly, two quotes from your Introduction stand out for me-

"It's important for people to understand that the one, single thing that any transexual woman desires more than anything is validation as a woman'".

and

"I believe people either learn from their dating mistakes and improve, or they're generally fated to make the same mistakes over and over and constantly find themselves performing a post-mortem on their most recently deceased relationship". (Note, this is also close to Einstein's definition of madness!).

I would also argue that while I think attitudes to transgendered people have improved substantially since my own reference point, the 1960s, there is still a deep vein of ridicule and abuse that can be found in the US, the UK and across the world where violence is a real threat. In the US at the moment, there are legal threats to the rights of transgendered citizens but I am not sure how much these are suported outside (or even inside) so called 'Evangelical Christian' communities. Every advance seems to provoke a step backward.

I think this means that a younger generation is more relaxed than mine was about trasgendered sex and relationships (let us not forget they used to be ilegal), but there remain existing hurdles based on race, religion and class, so that even if a man forms a relationship with a transwoman, the hostility of his parents and family may be due to her own family background rather than her identity or character. Throw in the chronic problem of education and employment, and one can see why for all the acceptance I have referred to, in practical terms it is still hard for transwomen to transition from school to work in the same way as their peers. And I daresay many posters here have met the transwoman whose main goal in life is to meet a man with enough money to support her so she doesn't need to work.

These problems are not unique to the transgendered world, but may be exagerrated because of inherent prejudice. In contrast, one of my closest friends has the ambition and drive to create a business, currently successful, in addition to working in the NHS -one is a full-time job, the other a 'swerve'. It can be done, but I wonder if it works because she has such a strong support network in her family, her husband's family and friends like me. Life can be deeply depressing for many transgendered people, and harsh when they feel acceptance is absent, but it is also the case that some need commitment at a level which some men are not prepated to give, but I wonder if such men would be just as non-committal with other women as with their transgendered sisters. As long as men just want to have fun, relationships will be off the table, and I think this is also true of some/many transgendered women who spend their life clubbing and fucking-I am not knocking it, but its better to be open and honest from the start, because not everyone shares the same aspiration, and it looks like your book will offer insights on the range of opinons and behaviour that exist, and advice on how to make dating work, so I hope it is a success.

thats a fantastic idea - hope it becomes a NYT best seller!