I have seperated from my family

[MHarrigan82]

My parents are big southern christian church going black people. My Dad is very homophobic and always talk about gay people negative. He want even watch a show with gay people. I have been dating a transgender woman for 7 months now. I told him Jesus would love all people straight, gay, big, or transgender. He was like it ain't natural and GOD created man and woman to procreate. I said in the old testament it was an abomination to eat shellfish. I told him my girlfriend was transgender and that I love her. He thought that I was playing, I told him that I was not and he hung up. My mom says that she is going to pray for me and cast out that demon. I believe in Jesus but my folks are like 60 years old and crazy. My parents live in another state and I have not seen them in over a year.

[Dino Velvet]

Sorry to hear that. I got a lot of family in Amarillo and Lubbock.

[Protoman2050@gmail.com]

Wow! I'm so sorry! I myself am a transwoman, and my parents are conservative Christian as well, and they would never do such a thing. They may look askance at me, but they'd never deliberately alienate me. That is not Christian behavior.

[Rusty Eldora]

I am sorry also, but you probably did the right thing. I would possibly in a while send them pictures of you and your girlfriend without again mentioning she is TS. Even in the most rigid Churches, most pastors have dealt with similar issues, so they may come around.

No need to make a fight of it though. Good luck

[TSMichelleAustin]

Im sorry to hear! I am from Texas and have a very conservative family who are big in god and church! But my family went to the pastor at the church I grew up in and he said I was born this way and god loves me! It was the best thing to ever happen for me and my family! I hope things get better!

[sukumvit boy]

"My parents live in another state..."
I'll say they do!
good luck.

[MHarrigan82]

Thank you for all your comments. I hope that I made the right decision. My family are from Alabama one of the most backwoods racist states in the nation. If we break up a few months or a year or two down the road I alienated my family but I love this person very much kind of a catch 22.

[Jackal]

Do you have other family members? Any who are kind to transgender women? Sorry to hear you were disrespected like this. Your girlfriend sounds special, so at least you are not alone.

[runround04]

Religion, ruining lives for 2000 years....

Very tough spot to be in and there isnt much that can be done to help it, peoples minds really cant be changed, especially with the background your family has. You just have to do whats right for you and your life and find support where you can. Good luck to you

[fivekatz]

That really sux. If you dad has never visual met your girl, while it is devious, perhaps you should introduce her as your "new" GG girl friend and let them see all the wonderful qualities you do without the prejudice of their knowing she is transexual.

Often once people know other people they realize that preconceived notions are not relevant. Prejudice always works better in the abstract than it does when you confronted that much of what we think is different isn't so different and that goodness is goodness?

At any rate this may be far fetched and easy for me to say from a keyboard. My heart goes out to you. It was years before my paternal grandfather would accept my first wife because she was a gentile. So over time hopefully your folks one way or the other will accept you and who you love.

[BiBoyinBeantown]

I'm sorry to hear about the differences with your family. I do hope that in time you reconcile and they accept your partner as part of the family. But if they don't, the separation is probably for the best for both you and her. It'll save you both a lot of grief in the long run.

[GroobySteven]

[QUOTE=MHarrigan82;1 I believe in Jesus but ....[/QUOTE]

Now you can really make some progress and move on with your life without the shackles. Separate from believing this old tosh, also!

[speedking59]

i guess i'm lucky. my parents are dead so i can do whatever the fuck i want without having to try to explain it to them. once my east Texas psycho-alcoholic hillbilly dad told me that he would kick my ass if i ever brought a Puerto Rican girl around the house. this amused me to no end since he had married a Mexican-American girl (my mom) in 1940s Texas, go figure.

[Nikka]

welcome to the tranny family :), we all been there done that

[my my my!]

My parents are big southern christian church going black people. My Dad is very homophobic and always talk about gay people negative. He want even watch a show with gay people. I have been dating a transgender woman for 7 months now. I told him Jesus would love all people straight, gay, big, or transgender. He was like it ain't natural and GOD created man and woman to procreate. I said in the old testament it was an abomination to eat shellfish. I told him my girlfriend was transgender and that I love her. He thought that I was playing, I told him that I was not and he hung up. My mom says that she is going to pray for me and cast out that demon. I believe in Jesus but my folks are like 60 years old and crazy. My parents live in another state and I have not seen them in over a year.

sad story man :(

To all ladies that might read this post/thread.

Family and some friends, is what many of us true trans-attracted males give up when dating or being in a relationship with a transwoman. It's hard for us men too.

I lost my family for love. And it didn't even last , go figure.

Could this be a reason why so many men chase instead of pursuing open relationships with transwomen? not trolling, serious question.

[amberskyi]

sad story man :(

To all ladies that might read this post/thread.

Family and some friends, is what many of us true trans-attracted males give up when dating or being in a relationship with a transwoman. It's hard for us men too.

I lost my family for love. And it didn't even last , go figure.

Could this be a reason why so many men chase instead of pursuing open relationships with transwomen? not trolling, serious question.

at the same time tho dating a trans woman doesnt mean having to lose your family.
my ex family was very cool with me both before and after they knew.
i want to hear from some of the men who have dated a ts girl and found acceptance from their families....

[giovanni_hotel]

That totally sucks man. I couldn't imagine separating from my family.
Your family's expectations IMO should not come before your well being and emotional happiness.

You're still they're child no matter what they say to your face. They may not understand, but I can't believe they will ever stop loving you.

[martin48]

at the same time tho dating a trans woman doesnt mean having to lose your family.
my ex family was very cool with me both before and after they knew.
i want to hear from some of the men who have dated a ts girl and found acceptance from their families....


My wife wasn't too pleased, if I remember right

[my my my!]

at the same time tho dating a trans woman doesnt mean having to lose your family.
my ex family was very cool with me both before and after they knew.
i want to hear from some of the men who have dated a ts girl and found acceptance from their families....

Yea, as far as people I know that have brought their girl to meet their family/parents/friends, the reaction has been about half and half. I live in very hispanic catholic area and it's usually the girl's parents that are very supportive and want their daughter to have a good husband/bf or gf even.

But also, on the man's side, I know plenty of guys that practically lost their family because of the girl being a transgendered female. In my case it's one of those "go do your gay sh*t somewhere else, you are no longer welcome here" , but still accept the phone call here and there. But I can tell the damage is done. Probably , realistically if it came down to it, they would show support, gladly I don't need it and am very Independent of it.

If I had that choice again, I would only lose my family for the absolutely right girl. She's gotta be worth it, don't know if that makes sense.

[amberskyi]

I wonder if i can get my ex on here to tell his positive experiences with dating trans woman and his family...

[CORVETTEDUDE]

Sorry to hear that, man. I'm in my 60's so, age has little to do with it. Bias from your upbringing is tough to overcome for most people. Your parents will most likely never come around to changing their outlook. I dealt witha similar issue. Stay strong...Adapt and Overcome!

[MHarrigan82]

I know you ladies have it rough but us guys also get alienated from so call friends and family. My girl mother likes me being around the family. She bought me a Christmas present and invited me for Christmas and New Year's dinner. I get along with her family fine her brother and sister like me too. My family would not welcome her for dinner.

[Rusty Eldora]

My wife wasn't too pleased, if I remember right

I am sure it was an interesting evening, day, week, month, year where you were in the doghouse.

[dabaldone]

I'm black and had two LTR's, one lasting over 8 years. My folks accepted both with open arms and no judgement. In fact, my dad and my ex's dad have become great friends even though we no longer date. But, my folk are not religious at all. They reject the religious dogma that seems to force parents to cast out their children,

[MHarrigan82]

I'm black and had two LTR's, one lasting over 8 years. My folks accepted both with open arms and no judgement. In fact, my dad and my ex's dad have become great friends even though we no longer date. But, my folk are not religious at all. They reject the religious dogma that seems to force parents to cast out their children,

Bro you are lucky that your folks are so open minded. I love my parents but they are so old fashioned and closed minded. I can't even drink around my mom. I had to move far away from them. My mom is super religious I could hardly do anything growing up.

[TSPornFan]

This is very sad. I hope you can find peace with your family.

Black culture in general promotes homophobic beliefs and hyper masculinity. The culture thinks any anal sex is gay even if it is with a woman. Eating pussy makes you less than a man. Anal and oral sex are sins and homosexual acts. It's just foolish beliefs.

[MHarrigan82]

This is very sad. I hope you can find peace with your family.

Black culture in general promotes homophobic beliefs and hyper masculinity. The culture thinks any anal sex is gay even if it is with a woman. Eating pussy makes you less than a man. Anal and oral sex are sins and homosexual acts. It's just foolish beliefs.

Very true the black culture is so hypocritical it ain't funny. You are acting the same way that the people that oppressed you did. I just learned to not give a fuck and live my life the way I want and don't try to live my life for other people.

[loren]

My heart goes out to you I hope everything works out for you. Family can suck sometimes, I mean its usually the ones who are closest to you that hurt you the most.

[fivekatz]

It will heal in time. Blood is blood and while they probably can never accept your life choices at some point they will realize that regardless you are their son.

It probably was a huge shock. I did not realize how homophobic so many in African-American community were until 2008 when Prop 8 passed in California because of the huge turn out of black Americans. An it was then that a friend explained to me the whole church thing.

I was ignorant until then assuming that those who had been denied civil rights so long would see the plight of others as their own. But the other thing I know about black families is that family is a huge thing. So whilst emotions run high now I have believe and hope and pray for you that your mom and dad will see that no matter how they disagree with your life choices that they cherish you.

Brighter days will follow this darkness I am sure...best wishes in the meantime because I know every day there is a divide between family is day less full.

[Chase_Mcthirsty]

My parents are big southern christian church going black people. My Dad is very homophobic and always talk about gay people negative. He want even watch a show with gay people. I have been dating a transgender woman for 7 months now. I told him Jesus would love all people straight, gay, big, or transgender. He was like it ain't natural and GOD created man and woman to procreate. I said in the old testament it was an abomination to eat shellfish. I told him my girlfriend was transgender and that I love her. He thought that I was playing, I told him that I was not and he hung up. My mom says that she is going to pray for me and cast out that demon. I believe in Jesus but my folks are like 60 years old and crazy. My parents live in another state and I have not seen them in over a year.

Yeah, I know what you're going through. Which is why I never could stand that religion...

Not "God" mind you... Just the people who think they know him.

[MHarrigan82]

Yeah, I know what you're going through. Which is why I never could stand that religion...

Not "God" mind you... Just the people who think they know him.

I am with you Chase, I love GOD but hate religion too many fake hypocritical people.

[MHarrigan82]

That really sux. If you dad has never visual met your girl, while it is devious, perhaps you should introduce her as your "new" GG girl friend and let them see all the wonderful qualities you do without the prejudice of their knowing she is transexual.

Often once people know other people they realize that preconceived notions are not relevant. Prejudice always works better in the abstract than it does when you confronted that much of what we think is different isn't so different and that goodness is goodness?

At any rate this may be far fetched and easy for me to say from a keyboard. My heart goes out to you. It was years before my paternal grandfather would accept my first wife because she was a gentile. So over time hopefully your folks one way or the other will accept you and who you love.

That is a good idea. They have never meet her in person but do know her name. My girl voiceis not very passable though.

[fred41]

Sorry that happened to you. If they love you, one or both of them might eventually come around. I think you did the right thing...even if you break up in the near future...even if you weren't dating a transsexual. Some people let their parents walk all over them. You let them know you disagree with their prejudiced opinions...and that you think they are wrong,and that's the right thing to do.
I hope it all works out for you...and I hope your parents also see the light.
Life is just too short to let irrational bullshit over rule love for ones child.

[Bunzee]

Im sorry to hear! I am from Texas and have a very conservative family who are big in god and church! But my family went to the pastor at the church I grew up in and he said I was born this way and god loves me! It was the best thing to ever happen for me and my family! I hope things get better!

that's great. being born a certain way is never anyone's fault, nature doesn't ask you how you want to be born. certain amount of ppl are straight gay, some have kids, some dont, but its nature who decides blaming or criticizing is bigotry.