A Question for our Black guys

[Wendy Summers]

When I headed down to Kentucky for the T-girls Solo 3 launch party, I had a number of guys who approached me wondering if I was cool with Black guys.

This entirely threw me for a loop since race is a total non-issue for me.

Do you find that most lilly white t-girls aren't down with the Brothers?

[lifeisfiction]

Down south is a completely different world. Still can't believe I was called a Yankee, when I went to grad school by a few friends. I was in the south for a few years and never met any tgs in the south. So I can't answer that question.

[DCGuy343]

That happens just about everywhere, north/south/east/west.

[BellaBellucci]

I had a number of guys who approached me wondering if I was cool with Black guys.

This entirely threw me for a loop since race is a total non-issue for me.

Co-sign. This happens to me all the time, too. In fact, in my case, I'm a sucker for the strong, yet smooth type, and I find that, culturally, black men have a near-monopoly on that.

~BB~

[christianxxx]

its a porn question I think. the porn industry has conditioned girls to use race as a bargaining chip to make more money. so generally speaking most girls won't do black guys unless they think it will make them more money down the road.

Preposterous I know. whatever

[Wendy Summers]

its a porn question I think. the porn industry has conditioned girls to use race as a bargaining chip to make more money. so generally speaking most girls won't do black guys unless they think it will make them more money down the road.

Preposterous I know. whatever

If these were porn performers asking, I would buy that... but they weren't. These were guys fishing for booty.

[christianxxx]

you misunderstood my post. black guys talking to porn stars are conditioned to ask that question because of the reasons I stated.

[soul4real]

I'm not sure about lilly white "T-girls" specific but i think that race is still a very conscious issue from a cultural perspective. Its stereotypical and judgmental to say but its more easy to spot a girl who "culturally" acts black and presume they like Black dudes, versus how warmly receptive the TS rock star chick would be to a black dude in J's and a snapback approaching her. I think its engrained in the American fabric itself to be race conscious. So for a lady like you who is open and just deals with people on individual basis its sad to say its still rare. :( people get stuck in their boxes and stigma's and that makes others apprehensive. I grew up in a mixed background and always just embraced people for who they are.

[lifeisfiction]

you misunderstood my post. black guys talking to porn stars are conditioned to ask that question because of the reasons I stated.

I don't think you understood Wendy's question. Racial tension still exists, but not like it was in the past.

[okcboi]

When I headed down to Kentucky for the T-girls Solo 3 launch party, I had a number of guys who approached me wondering if I was cool with Black guys.

This entirely threw me for a loop since race is a total non-issue for me.

Do you find that most lilly white t-girls aren't down with the Brothers?

Yes I live in oklahoma!!!

[giovanni_hotel]

Even if 100 White tgirls say that race is a non-issue, that ONE White TG who says she's not interested in BM will be the one person too many BM will obsess over, because of the rejection.

There's enough girls who escort that say upfront NO BLACK MEN that I can see where this paranoia comes from, even if I think it's not really an issue.

[ValerieNelson]

I've been asked by BMs quite a few times, and yeah I do live in Texas. They always seemed pleasantly surprised when I say, "Pull up a stool, and let's chit chat a while."

[BellaBellucci]

I've been asked by BMs quite a few times, and yeah I do live in Texas. They always seemed pleasantly surprised when I say, "Pull up a stool, and let's chit chat a while."

Some people really need to choose their wording more carefully, lest they summon Dino.

~BB~

[ValerieNelson]

Some people really need to choose their wording more carefully, lest they summon Dino.

~BB~

I'm hoping to actually summon Dino, but thought if I typed BM, BM, BM, BM!!! Over and over again, I might be marked for spam! :D

[BellaBellucci]

I'm hoping to actually summon Dino, but thought if I typed BM, BM, BM, BM!!! Over and over again, I might be marked for spam! :D

You only have to say it three times. He's kinda like Beatlejuice in that way.

~BB~

[dabaldone]

I'm not sure about lilly white "T-girls" specific but i think that race is still a very conscious issue from a cultural perspective. Its stereotypical and judgmental to say but its more easy to spot a girl who "culturally" acts black and presume they like Black dudes, versus how warmly receptive the TS rock star chick would be to a black dude in J's and a snapback approaching her. I think its engrained in the American fabric itself to be race conscious. So for a lady like you who is open and just deals with people on individual basis its sad to say its still rare. :( people get stuck in their boxes and stigma's and that makes others apprehensive. I grew up in a mixed background and always just embraced people for who they are.

Excellent post! Too many ladies sterotype black men in general, from thinking we're thugs or criminals and have hang ups dealing with trans-women. Growing up going to private schools, a two parent home and being a white collar professional is the norm for where I came from. I've run into some sisters who refuse to date the brothers because of this mindset.

[Dino Velvet]

You only have to say it three times. He's kinda like Beatlejuice in that way.

~BB~

Only need to call me once. Other character tends to run late so holler at him 5 times.

[BellaBellucci]

Only need to call me once. Other character tends to run late so holler at him 5 times.

I stand corrected, Prince of Poop.

~BB~

[soul4real]

Even if 100 White tgirls say that race is a non-issue, that ONE White TG who says she's not interested in BM will be the one person too many BM will obsess over, because of the rejection.

There's enough girls who escort that say upfront NO BLACK MEN that I can see where this paranoia comes from, even if I think it's not really an issue.



Yup that one feeling of being rejected based soley on the color of your skin will have you approach the next woman hesitantly. Shit but I mean its been going on since the star spangled banner., RIP EMMIT TILL

[Dino Velvet]

I stand corrected, Prince of Poop.

~BB~

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lzbdqaQGu61qewmamo2_250.gif

[Token Williams-Black]

That happens just about everywhere, north/south/east/west.
This right here.

"One bad apple spoils the whole bunch."

"One bad card ruins the whole deck."

[Token Williams-Black]

Too many ladies sterotype black men in general, from thinking we're thugs or criminals and have hang ups dealing with trans-women. Growing up going to private schools, a two parent home and being a white collar professional is the norm for where I came from. I've run into some sisters who refuse to date the brothers because of this mindset.
Another excellent post. The few that have met me (and given my location there are VERY few) know that imma cool guy, not the stereotypical black male.

[FreddieGomez]

i never had this problem,

as i dont really date people who only view me as a walking "big black dick" instead of an actual person.

i'll stick to my latina chicks.

[blkmamba]

I think we asked cause we want the girls to feel comfortable. And if she have hang up against me for being a black man. I dont want to be with her neither. It's best if we're both comfortable with eachother.

[tsdvdman]

The key is to really know and understand body language. The body just doesn't lie. It will let you know without a word verbally being spoken if someone is cool and interested in you or even just cool socializing with you.
My experience is that white women will let you know they are down with the brothers...subtlely by coming into my space or more aggressively by the lingering smile and eye contact..or if at the club shaking their ass for the attention

[Legspreader]

Yes! I believe most white Ts are not into black males for reasons known to them. It never bothers me though.

[chromeheart44m]

I'm not sure about lilly white "T-girls" specific but i think that race is still a very conscious issue from a cultural perspective. Its stereotypical and judgmental to say but its more easy to spot a girl who "culturally" acts black and presume they like Black dudes, versus how warmly receptive the TS rock star chick would be to a black dude in J's and a snapback approaching her. I think its engrained in the American fabric itself to be race conscious. So for a lady like you who is open and just deals with people on individual basis its sad to say its still rare. :( people get stuck in their boxes and stigma's and that makes others apprehensive. I grew up in a mixed background and always just embraced people for who they are.
i just dont undastand y snapbacks are cool again

[Wendy Summers]

Another excellent post. The few that have met me (and given my location there are VERY few) know that imma cool guy, not the stereotypical black male.

but... but... I thought you were our token... :wiggle:

[Token Williams-Black]

i just dont undastand y snapbacks are cool again

loooooool Fitteds for life!

[Token Williams-Black]

but... but... I thought you were our token... :wiggle:
Only in South Park...not Fresno...

[BigBlackMan]

Yes ts hate black men

[brickcitybrother]

Didn't read all the other responses just answering the question.

Yes, this occurs - PERIOD. I was quite surprised when it happened to me for the following reasons:

1st - The girls who brought this up made it clear that they don't; Talk to, Deal with, Date or Interact with BLACK GUYS;

2nd - The girls who had this position were so negative in expressing it - it took me aback. Hard to do to a guy who grew up in Brickcity and ran all over NYC; and

3rd - The girls were not expressing a preference of who they liked - they expressed clear dislike to one group - Blacks. It was especially clear when one girl asked if I was black (yes we chatted first) and then told me she would not deal with me. She expressed that she wasa disappointed because I didn't sound black and seemed very interesting. WTF?!?!?

So its out there ... I won't say who I've seen on this board who falls into this category ... but it is a shame, but then again they are the ones missing out on meeting good interesting people and we're avoiding racists.

[Jericho]

Yes ts hate black men

Nah, I'm thinking it's personal there! :shrug

[buttslinger]

What would Dre say?



Bitches Ain't Shit Dr. Dre Feat. Snoop Dogg (A cappella Ben Folds Remix - Girls Prep Cover) - YouTube (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHsrHX_PMsw)

[Wendy Summers]

This makes me sad... I never judge anyone based on their skin color.

Cock size, yes.

But skin color... never.

[soul4real]

This makes me sad... I never judge anyone based on their skin color.

Cock size, yes.

But skin color... never.



Funny so should i whip it out at the bar before i offer a drink? lol
it sucks its the reality of being black in america lol

But the great thing is one a guy realizes you aren't prejudice against getting to know him.. You become inf infinitly more hotter *stares drooling*

[johnb85]

I think that it is hard for someone who did not grow up or has not lived in the deep south for a good number of years to understand the cultural differences that are a fact of life down here. I have had the good fortune to travel fairly extensively throughout the US, Canada, and Europe, and I feel like I have a pretty decent understanding of the unique situation down here, although I don't claim to be an expert in Sociology, Psychology, or any other ologies.

Now, before I get flamed for being racist, let me just state that I am a realist and I know what I have witnessed with my own eyes and heard with my own ears. First off, there are good and bad examples of every race. There are hispanics that come to this country and work hard and become citizens, then there are those who come to sponge off the system, sell drugs, never pay taxes, and cause me to have to press '1' for English. Likewise, there are whites who are well educated, have good jobs, and do well for themselves, and then there are those who are missing half their teeth, speak in broken english and cook meth in the back bedroom of their trailer homes. Blacks are no different, there are good and bad, but the mainstream media and cultural history cause the extremes to be more magnified. Add to that the Jesse Jacksons and Al Sharptons of the world who try to play the race card at times where it has no bearing on the situation, and try to encourage black people to have a chip on their shoulder and it just makes things worse.

Now the situation here in the south is unique in that the ratio of 'good' black people to 'bad examples' is extremely distorted compared to everywhere else in the world that I have ever been. I have good friends, coworkers, and neighbors who are black and I don't see them as anything else other than people. At the same time, there are a whole lot more blacks who exhibit most of the stereotypical behavior (loud music with obscene lyrics, sagging pants, ebonics, aggressive behavior, drug dealing, etc.) If I had a dollar for every time I have been called 'honky' or 'cracker' for no other reason than I am a white male I would be a rich man.

Now, as far as the OP question goes, most white females down here fall into three categories:
1) Ones who also exhibit the stereotypical behavior, speaking in broken ebonics and all, and it should be noted that these girls are typically obese and fairly unattractive. These girls will only date black guys.
2) Ones who flat out will not date black guys. This can be either because of purely personal preference or it can also be caused by worrying what others will think. I have a very close friend who is white and she was in an interracial relationship with a black man and had a wonderful son. Ever since they broke up, most white men she talks to lose interest in her when they find out she has an interracial child.
3) Ones who have truly open minds and judge each person individually, as it should be. Unfortunately, these are the minority here in the south.

Hope this all makes at least a little sense and I haven't offended anyone too badly.

[Wendy Summers]

Funny so should i whip it out at the bar before i offer a drink? lol
it sucks its the reality of being black in america lol

But the great thing is one a guy realizes you aren't prejudice against getting to know him.. You become inf infinitly more hotter *stares drooling*

I think the expression goes, when in doubt... ;)

That was some of why it amazed me... I'd be sitting and chatting with these guys for a few minutes before the question came out... it was like "if I was racist, why would I even talk with you?"

[soul4real]

I think the expression goes, when in doubt... ;)

That was some of why it amazed me... I'd be sitting and chatting with these guys for a few minutes before the question came out... it was like "if I was racist, why would I even talk with you?"



Fear or rejection.. when they ask that just flash em.. it will shock them into a euphoric state and make them forget about racism lol

Yeah sucks i love the diversity of dating diffrent races.. and lilly KINKY white girls rock lol

[BlkJewels]

And for the record Sweetness, it's not just white tgirls. Blacks and Browns (tg's) are on that same BS.

[Quiet Reflections]

I have never asked a girl in the beginning of a conversation but I can see how some might, it certainly would helps the less bold save their time. In my single days I would spit game to any girl whether I thought she was interested or not. I particularly liked the challenge of going after a girl when I knew I wasn't her type.

[FreddieGomez]

it's always the ugliest white chicks into black dudes.

u dont see chicks like megan fox or angelina jole into black dudes.

[blkmamba]

it's always the ugliest white chicks into black dudes.

u dont see chicks like megan fox or angelina jole into black dudes.

How many black dudes do you know? Probably not many my man. Personally I love the pretiest white bitches, cause I love it when I walk in some where and all the white dudes are just drooling and like wtf.

[StinkyPete1000]

I've never had a problem (I take that back. Once on the phone a girl asked if I was black and when I told her that I was, she told me she didn't see black guys and hung up). Otherwise, I've never been in a situation where I've showed up to see a girl and she turned me down because she wasn't expecting to see a black guy. So, I guess I've been fairly lucky.

However, I've seen countless ads (posted by white, black and Latina tgirls) which state the the girl does not see black guys (some say "white guys only"). It certainly sucks but at least I know not to call.

It's extremely hypocritical as well. Here are a group of girls that attribute a certain set of negative characteristics to an entire group of people (i.e. black men are cheap, dangerous, thugs etc). Meanwhile, these very same girls get upset when they are treated differently (poorly) because of who they are. They want to be accepted and struggle constantly to destroy stereotypes and prejudices associated with being a tgirl. It's quite sad that they don't see the irony in how they treat black men.

[Token Williams-Black]

It's extremely hypocritical as well. Here are a group of girls that attribute a certain set of negative characteristics to an entire group of people (i.e. black men are cheap, dangerous, thugs etc). Meanwhile, these very same girls get upset when they are treated differently (poorly) because of who they are. They want to be accepted and struggle constantly to destroy stereotypes and prejudices associated with being a tgirl. It's quite sad that they don't see the irony in how they treat black men.
Speak on it!
:werd:

[maddygirl]

I think it's totally wrong when people characterize all black men as being thieves, thugs, etc. However, I don't think it's wrong that people have preferences when it comes to dating. I know asians who prefer dating black men, white girls who prefer dating white guys, I don't see the problem there. Escorts however shouldn't be that way though, as they aren't dating the guy just doing business, so that I disagree with...

[StinkyPete1000]

I think it's totally wrong when people characterize all black men as being thieves, thugs, etc. However, I don't think it's wrong that people have preferences when it comes to dating. I know asians who prefer dating black men, white girls who prefer dating white guys, I don't see the problem there. Escorts however shouldn't be that way though, as they aren't dating the guy just doing business, so that I disagree with...
I agree. No one should be judged for their own personal preferences. And escorts have the right to be selective. That being said, it's one thing if a girl doesn't see black men because she doesn't find us attractive. It's another story altogether if it's less about preference and more about stereotypes. I've known tons of gg's and tgirls that found black men extremely attractive but wouldn't act on their desires because of their own prejudices. I've no other way to describe that but just plain dumb.

[Dino Velvet]

Here are a group of girls that attribute a certain set of negative characteristics to an entire group of people (i.e. black men are cheap, dangerous, thugs etc).

You'd think they'd worry about serial killers. Usually our thing. Walk in looking like choirboys not giving off a hint of sulfur until the die is cast.

[StinkyPete1000]

You'd think they'd worry about serial killers. Usually our thing. Walk in looking like choirboys not giving off a hint of sulfur until the die is cast.
Haha so true

[blkmamba]

Haha so true

True...but don't wish death on any of these girls. It's their choice and some of them I would not touch anyway..

[natina]

in HOLLYWOOD HILLS,BEVERLY HILLS,ENCINO,WOODLAND HILLS,LA,CANOGA PARK AND many many other places I see pretty white women with nice look to ugly black guys. it depends on where you go and when.

Victoria station ( a restaurant /bar) in universal city was famous for black & white hooks ups/interracial dating etc..


it's always the ugliest white chicks into black dudes.

u dont see chicks like megan fox or angelina jole into black dudes.

[Token Williams-Black]

Most black males are judged by the actions of Rodney King instead of Martin Luther King...

[Wendy Summers]

Fear or rejection.. when they ask that just flash em.. it will shock them into a euphoric state and make them forget about racism lol

Yeah sucks i love the diversity of dating diffrent races.. and lilly KINKY white girls rock lol

Thank YOU sir!


And for the record Sweetness, it's not just white tgirls. Blacks and Browns (tg's) are on that same BS.

Too beaucoup, IMO


I have never asked a girl in the beginning of a conversation but I can see how some might, it certainly would helps the less bold save their time. In my single days I would spit game to any girl whether I thought she was interested or not. I particularly liked the challenge of going after a girl when I knew I wasn't her type.

You remind me of the black guy who wanted to date me for like 4 months -- he didn't believe me when I told him I had a cock. LOL


it's always the ugliest white chicks into black dudes.

u dont see chicks like megan fox or angelina jole into black dudes.

I have now been trolled by Freddie... I can cross that off my Hung Angels bucketlist :dancing:

[Wendy Summers]

It's extremely hypocritical as well. Here are a group of girls that attribute a certain set of negative characteristics to an entire group of people (i.e. black men are cheap, dangerous, thugs etc). Meanwhile, these very same girls get upset when they are treated differently (poorly) because of who they are. They want to be accepted and struggle constantly to destroy stereotypes and prejudices associated with being a tgirl. It's quite sad that they don't see the irony in how they treat black men.

I see it... although I was like this pre-transition too... I don't get racial hangups.


Most black males are judged by the actions of Rodney King instead of Martin Luther King...

To be fair, very few people of ANY skin color are as good a person as Martin Luther King was.

[youngblood61]

If their were more girls like you Wendy this wouldn't be a issue. Glad you don't have a hangup, but you seem to be an exception.:sad:

[Token Williams-Black]

If their were more girls like you Wendy this wouldn't be a issue. Glad you don't have a hangup, but you seem to be an exception.:sad:

I am in agreement with this statement.

[south ov da border]

I find that white girls can be down with you or not. It really depends on their experience and if they think you are going to pay. A lot of brothers I know think they are God's gift and a girl should want them because they feel they are hung or whatever. Never met a trans girl that didn't make you pay in one form or another, but maybe that works for some guys.

But that's my experience. Some white girls just won't mess with you for being black. And it's their experience a lot of times...

[BellaBellucci]

To be fair, very few people of ANY skin color are as good a person as Martin Luther King was.

Well, you know, except possibly to Mrs. King. :lol:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martin_Luther_King,_Jr.

~BB~

[Wendy Summers]

If their were more girls like you Wendy this wouldn't be a issue. Glad you don't have a hangup, but you seem to be an exception.:sad:


I am in agreement with this statement.

:oops:


Well, you know, except possibly to Mrs. King. :lol:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Martin_Luther_King,_Jr.

~BB~

:shrug I'm a poor judge of character.

[cfsmooth]

I think what some of the white tgirls may be concerned about is the same thing I fight against every day. I am a black male that is educated, has manners, and can speak the english language. What they are probably concerned about is the growing number of black males that do not have manners, cannot speak properly, and cannot turn off their hip hop lifestyle when it is not appropriate. I say this because of how many time I have met non-black tgirls and they are shocked that I treat them with respect and present myself.

[tsdvdman]

Good discussion..This thread is a microcosm of a much larger reality. Black men are the most intriguing, analyzed, scrutinized, species in the world. We are like the Gods. Anywhere everywhere we go..doesn't matter what city country state or island..we are revered..hated..loved..worshipped even idolized.
There will always be widely ostracized "taboo-ish" questions regarding the black man..and that is why the other most analyzed species (the WHITE WOMAN) will always fall to her knees to suck his cock, and find him intimidatingly irresistable.

[amberskyi]

I think what some of the white tgirls may be concerned about is the same thing I fight against every day. I am a black male that is educated, has manners, and can speak the english language. What they are probably concerned about is the growing number of black males that do not have manners, cannot speak properly, and cannot turn off their hip hop lifestyle when it is not appropriate. I say this because of how many time I have met non-black tgirls and they are shocked that I treat them with respect and present myself.

EXACTLY...i am so turned off by that whole ignorant,ghetto im hard attitude (that goes for any race)unfortunately the majority of young black males buy into this bull.thats why when i find an educated,intelligent brother im all on it,like white on rice lol

[Quiet Reflections]

EXACTLY...i am so turned off by that whole ignorant,ghetto im hard attitude (that goes for any race)unfortunately the majority of young black males buy into this bull.thats why when i find an educated,intelligent brother im all on it,like white on rice lol
Why does it have to be white rice? You don't like Brown or wild rice?.jk

[Token Williams-Black]

I think what some of the white tgirls may be concerned about is the same thing I fight against every day. I am a black male that is educated, has manners, and can speak the english language. What they are probably concerned about is the growing number of black males that do not have manners, cannot speak properly, and cannot turn off their hip hop lifestyle when it is not appropriate. I say this because of how many time I have met non-black tgirls and they are shocked that I treat them with respect and present myself.

Agreed.

[StinkyPete1000]

EXACTLY...i am so turned off by that whole ignorant,ghetto im hard attitude (that goes for any race)unfortunately the majority of young black males buy into this bull.thats why when i find an educated,intelligent brother im all on it,like white on rice lol
I agree with almost everything you said. Almost. I am sick of that thug stuff too but, unless you know 51% of all young black males, do not say that the majority act like that. That's not the case at all. There are scores of educated, young black men it's just that the thugs are the ones you hear about. The media would have you believe that the majority of us act like that and many people do believe it. But it's even worse when our own people believe that the majority or young black males are thugs. Or everyone's favorite statistic: that the majority of young black males are incarcerated. That's actually NOT true. There are actually far more black men between the ages of 18-24 at a college or university than in jail.

If we pigeon-hole ourselves how can we expect others to pull their heads out of the sand and realize we all aren't ignorant criminals.

[amberskyi]

I agree with almost everything you said. Almost. I am sick of that thug stuff too but, unless you know 51% of all young black males, do not say that the majority act like that. That's not the case at all. There are scores of educated, young black men it's just that the thugs are the ones you hear about. The media would have you believe that the majority of us act like that and many people do believe it. But it's even worse when our own people believe that the majority or young black males are thugs. Or everyone's favorite statistic: that the majority of young black males are incarcerated. That's actually NOT true. There are actually far more black men between the ages of 18-24 at a college or university than in jail.

If we pigeon-hole ourselves how can we expect others to pull their heads out of the sand and realize we all aren't ignorant criminals.

I don't need the need the news, this is the life I live.I come from a black family and grew up in a black city.i'm not saying that the majority of our young men are thugs, not at all but the majority act, talk and dress like they are.that's why its so damn frustrating.they rather perpetuate this stupid life style than live up to their potential.I can't tell you how many times i've been called uppity or a white wanna be because id rather talk like I know the english language lol.i'm proud to say that I've been allot of places and meet allot of different kind of people and its always refreshing to meet a black man who is proud to be intelligent and educated, that doesn't dumb hisself down to be cool.

[Dino Velvet]

like white on rice lol

I like White on Rice too.:fuckin:

[StinkyPete1000]

I don't need the need the news, this is the life I live.I come from a black family and grew up in a black city.i'm not saying that the majority of our young men are thugs, not at all but the majority act, talk and dress like they are.that's why its so damn frustrating.they rather perpetuate this stupid life style than live up to their potential.I can't tell you how many times i've been called uppity or a white wanna be because id rather talk like I know the english language lol.i'm proud to say that I've been allot of places and meet allot of different kind of people and its always refreshing to meet a black man who is proud to be intelligent and educated, that doesn't dumb hisself down to be cool.
That's the type of logic I'm talking about. I'm black too, grew up in a poor neighborhood too and I've seen things that rappers only rap about. Who cares? If you're going to say the "majority" based only on what YOU saw then your logic is flawed and you are no different than a white person who SAW a black man commit a crime and thinks the "majority" of black men are criminals.

It's funny how that logic is ok when you use it but if a white person says that the majority of blacks are "x" then we say "don't put us all in that category." that's my point. Your logic is no different than the tgirls we are talking about in this thread. You and them both stereotype a whole group based on the FEW that you personally have seen.

[amberskyi]

That's the type of logic I'm talking about. I'm black too, grew up in a poor neighborhood too and I've seen things that rappers only rap about. Who cares? If you're going to say the "majority" based only on what YOU saw then your logic is flawed and you are no different than a white person who SAW a black man commit a crime and thinks the "majority" of black men are criminals.

It's funny how that logic is ok when you use it but if a white person says that the majority of blacks are "x" then we say "don't put us all in that category." that's my point. Your logic is no different than the tgirls we are talking about in this thread. You and them both stereotype a whole group based on the FEW that you personally have seen.

I didn't grow up in the hood,I have family in the hood lol but I come from a middle class background.

[StinkyPete1000]

I didn't grow up in the hood,I have family in the hood lol but I come from a middle class background.
Lol. But seriously, I don't completely disagree with what you're saying.

[amberskyi]

That's the type of logic I'm talking about. I'm black too, grew up in a poor neighborhood too and I've seen things that rappers only rap about. Who cares? If you're going to say the "majority" based only on what YOU saw then your logic is flawed and you are no different than a white person who SAW a black man commit a crime and thinks the "majority" of black men are criminals.

It's funny how that logic is ok when you use it but if a white person says that the majority of blacks are "x" then we say "don't put us all in that category." that's my point. Your logic is no different than the tgirls we are talking about in this thread. You and them both stereotype a whole group based on the FEW that you personally have seen.

also i never said that the majority of young black men are criminals i said the majority of young men perpetuate the IMAGE of a certain lifestyle.dont believe me go to howard university as see how many of our educated men still talk in ebonics and ghetto slang for the purposes of being cool

[StinkyPete1000]

also i never said that the majority of young black men are criminals i said the majority of young men perpetuate the IMAGE of a certain lifestyle.dont believe me go to howard university as see how many of our educated men still talk in ebonics and ghetto slang for the purposes of being cool
I think you're missing my point. My point wasn't whether you said criminals or act like criminals. My problem is with your use of the word "majority." that's a dangerous word to use in a debate since its almost never accurate. You want to talk about perpetuating a stereotype? How about when even black people claim that we all ACT a certain way...

If even you think your own people act a certain way then it's clear that not even we know how many good, educated young brothers and sisters there are out there. I don't know who you knew at Howard but fortunately they are not all like that (and again I doubt you know the majority of Howard men) and even if you were correct about Howard it says nothing about us as a whole.

[StinkyPete1000]

I think you're missing my point. My point wasn't whether you said criminals or act like criminals. My problem is with your use of the word "majority." that's a dangerous word to use in a debate since its almost never accurate. You want to talk about perpetuating a stereotype? How about when even black people claim that we all ACT a certain way...

If even you think your own people act a certain way then it's clear that not even we know how many good, educated young brothers and sisters there are out there. I don't know who you knew at Howard but fortunately they are not all like that (and again I doubt you know the majority of Howard men) and even if you were correct about Howard it says nothing about us as a whole.
People seem to have a hard time understanding that their own life experiences are not always indicative of how things are generally. If every blond girl I ever met in my life was an idiot that doesn't make it logical for me to conclude that all blinds are dumb. If every guy you met at Howard acts like a thug that doesn't mean all black men (or in your case the majority) act similarly.

[giovanni_hotel]

Good discussion..This thread is a microcosm of a much larger reality. Black men are the most intriguing, analyzed, scrutinized, species in the world. We are like the Gods. Anywhere everywhere we go..doesn't matter what city country state or island..we are revered..hated..loved..worshipped even idolized.
There will always be widely ostracized "taboo-ish" questions regarding the black man..and that is why the other most analyzed species (the WHITE WOMAN) will always fall to her knees to suck his cock, and find him intimidatingly irresistable.http://www.hungangels.com/vboard/attachment.php?attachmentid=479163&stc=1&d=1340315125


WTF???

My new desktop screen.

[amberskyi]

People seem to have a hard time understanding that their own life experiences are not always indicative of how things are generally. If every blond girl I ever met in my life was an idiot that doesn't make it logical for me to conclude that all blinds are dumb. If every guy you met at Howard acts like a thug that doesn't mean all black men (or in your case the majority) act similarly.

i can only go based on my own personal experiences....

[giovanni_hotel]

P Diddy went to Howard and he isn't indicative of anyone I know who went there.
The father of my roommate in college was a Howard grad and a corporate lawyer in Georgetown and that dude was always clean and pressed.
Kids flipping slang in college isn't representative of how they present themselves in a more formal setting.

[Merkurie]

Having an education is not necessary to carry oneself with dignity and self respect. Black men managed to accomplish that for centuries despite being denied a right to basically everything. I just have to point that out.

What we have now is an insidious conscious effort to redefine and undermine a culture.

[StinkyPete1000]

i can only go based on my own personal experiences....
That's absolutely right. Just don't let your own experiences poison how you view the rest of the world and the people in it.

[StinkyPete1000]

P Diddy went to Howard and he isn't indicative of anyone I know who went there.
The father of my roommate in college was a Howard grad and a corporate lawyer in Georgetown and that dude was always clean and pressed.
Kids flipping slang in college isn't representative of how they present themselves in a more formal setting.
Very good point. Some of those guys code switch. When they are with their buddies they speak one way and when they are at work they sound completely different.

[StinkyPete1000]

Having an education is not necessary to carry oneself with dignity and self respect. Black men managed to accomplish that for centuries despite being denied a right to basically everything. I just have to point that out.

What we have now is an insidious conscious effort to redefine and undermine a culture.
Agreed.

[amberskyi]

That's absolutely right. Just don't let your own experiences poison how you view the rest of the world and the people in it.

i always take people at face value...

[joecrack]

When I headed down to Kentucky for the T-girls Solo 3 launch party, I had a number of guys who approached me wondering if I was cool with Black guys.

This entirely threw me for a loop since race is a total non-issue for me.

Do you find that most lilly white t-girls aren't down with the Brothers?

i'm black. and i'm from and live in california. I've been in sf and la, and i can tell you its EXTREMELY common for not just white but specifically white and asian girls (but others too) to rule me out or reject me simply because i'm black. i mean rejection, i'm not talking to you etc sort of thing. and i'm talking about the dating world primarily.

but i've also noticed in the escort world there are many ladies that flat out state every race but black as a preference or overtly state they something like "no blacks" often accompanied by "no offense, not racists." now that's possibly true. i'm not here to call everyone racists or say they are wrong to have a preference. i don't. i love anyone that's sexy and fine. but yeah the anti black thing is common.

i think it occurs for different reasons with different people. some it may be an attraction thing and others i think merely assume we are all uneducated and/or violent which is ridiculous. i'm have several degrees, i'm well educated, i can speak properly, i'm nice and polite, and i can take care of myself but i'mfar from violent. but i do run into people that rule me out based on skin color. But i know it so i just try to be observant in a social setting and you know play the percentages. that is if you see someone looking at you or you see them conversing or interested in other people of color.

sidenote it's not uncommon for this to happen with straight black male on women interactions. it was very common for me and friends to admire a biological female from afar, not sure if she was open to dating black men, as we didn't see them around them often. but you have a hunch. just from manerisms and then later you find out they are dating a brother and go, "damn I knew she like brothas. damn. lol"

last thing. I read a study about dating sites where they tracked the habits of people on the website. it found out that well over 98% of the people, when having to choose a racial preference intheir profile chose "no preference." But when they look at the race of the people those people contacted it was overwhelmingly people only of their own race. by overwhelming it was still in the mid 90th percentile. That is even though they said no preference the only people they approached where of their own race. What they concluded with the study was that the question saying state your preference is typically interpreted as "are you racist" And people thus put no preference. But in reality they have a preference and when not put on the spot they act on it.

[Wendy Summers]

i said the majority of young men perpetuate the IMAGE of a certain lifestyle.dont believe me go to howard university as see how many of our educated men still talk in ebonics and ghetto slang for the purposes of being cool

This isn't a racial thing; Too many people do things to seem cool; I call them sheep.

Personally I find folks who actually act like complex individuals the most interesting.

[Wendy Summers]

last thing. I read a study about dating sites where they tracked the habits of people on the website. it found out that well over 98% of the people, when having to choose a racial preference intheir profile chose "no preference." But when they look at the race of the people those people contacted it was overwhelmingly people only of their own race. by overwhelming it was still in the mid 90th percentile. That is even though they said no preference the only people they approached where of their own race. What they concluded with the study was that the question saying state your preference is typically interpreted as "are you racist" And people thus put no preference. But in reality they have a preference and when not put on the spot they act on it.

Last time I used a dating website, of the people I went out with: 1 was Persian; 1 was (proudly declared) African American; 1 was Nigerian; 2 were from India; 2 were White. My actions match my words.

[south ov da border]

Very good point. Some of those guys code switch. When they are with their buddies they speak one way and when they are at work they sound completely different.


That's me. Get your book education and your street education. Sonny taught me that *Bronx Tale.

But seriously, Black guys can have it rough. A guy like me didn't know Oreo as a cookie. I knew it as the name they called me growing up. I spoke well and I can't help it. My family raised me that way, even though I grew up in a neighborhood called Little Vietnam in Miami. It was a warzone and still is at times. I tried to not be a product of environment.And in a lot of aspects of my life I'm not. Instead of going outside getting in trouble, my family had a library in the house and I read encyclopeidas and books. That was me. I like other cultures, tried to learn more than one language, and try to NOT fit the stereotypes of being black- even though some just apply to me.

I have had a lot of friends from other cultures. And once I OPEN MY MOUTH, IGNORANT is the last thing one thinks.

All in al I like people for them, not what I'm supposed to think of them.

[joecrack]

also i never said that the majority of young black men are criminals i said the majority of young men perpetuate the IMAGE of a certain lifestyle.dont believe me go to howard university as see how many of our educated men still talk in ebonics and ghetto slang for the purposes of being cool

It's ridiculous to assume that the dialect the people speak somehow is indicative of a nefarious lifestyle. I've been to Howard. I lived in DC and frequented the campus, jogged on the track, attended homecoming, used that Starbucks that's on Campus next to the bookstore. But why should black people have to alter their accent to appear white. See that's the problem. For blacks if you don't act white, many whites won't accept you or treat you with respect. What you've said is like telling Asian people to lose their accent or Latinos to stop rolling their r's and stop speaking what's referred to as Chicano English.

"A certain lifestyle?" at "Howard University?" What is that? That they are university students? That they are trying to get an education? What that they are young and black? Maybe they, like everyone else of every race like to dress in nice clothes or have a nice car? I mean come on. You're grafting your impressions of people onto them. I mean come on. And your problem is their slang? It's one thing if they can't speak properly in a business or professional setting. It's another if they are using slang in the company of of their own. My parents have mulitple degrees in the science fields, they have been not just exects but director level, and they speak completely different in the workplace then they do when they are around just black people. And they are from the ghetto. That doesn't make them ghetto.



Last time I used a dating website, of the people I went out with: 1 was Persian; 1 was (proudly declared) African American; 1 was Nigerian; 2 were from India; 2 were White. My actions match my words.

Yeah i suspect you are a uniquely strong minded individual. I'd guess in general if people's already have an idea of their "dream mate" that or they typically pursue mates of a certain race that merely continues when on a dating site. But they aren't going to publically state they won't date men of a certain race as that just looks bad. It also may give the impression that they would never date people of a certain race when they would under certain circumstances. What me and my friends have deemed this as sort of the when you meet a, typically white but sometimes asian, girl and they want a caricature of a black man they've seen on tv. That is they want, 50 cent (the rich rapper caricature) or Will Smith (the tall rich handsome actor), or maybe denzel or Shemar Moore. And if you don't measure up in terms of how you carry yourself, that is like a wealthy entertainer with lots of money to spend and power and influence then they kinda just move on to the next potential mate. I get not liking a dude cause he's simply not attractive. Shit i like Shemar Moore, lol. But i think when that other stuff is the standard of what constitutes an acceptable black man that's as ridiculous as turning down the pretty girl at starbucks cause she doesn't seem to have as much going on right now as Kate Upton. It's an unrealistic standard.

As for me. i'm lucky. i grew up around many many cultures so i find pretty much ever race tear my clothes off and pin me down orgasm inducing sexy. I never like the question, "what's your type." My type is "fine!" And "fine" isn't bound by ethnicity in my mind. Plus it means my potential dating pool is massive and that's good for me.

[onmyknees]

Good discussion..This thread is a microcosm of a much larger reality. Black men are the most intriguing, analyzed, scrutinized, species in the world. We are like the Gods. Anywhere everywhere we go..doesn't matter what city country state or island..we are revered..hated..loved..worshipped even idolized.
There will always be widely ostracized "taboo-ish" questions regarding the black man..and that is why the other most analyzed species (the WHITE WOMAN) will always fall to her knees to suck his cock, and find him intimidatingly irresistable.


Well this was formerly a good, measured discussion until that crock of shit. I think you've fulfilled some folks apprehensions and stereotyping rather nicely. Well Done. Freddie meet tsdvdman.

[TSPornFan]

I see white girls in the south wanting black men. I am sure it was more of a porn question. Many white female performers do not want to work with black men.

[Wendy Summers]

I see white girls in the south wanting black men. I am sure it was more of a porn question. Many white female performers do not want to work with black men.

Nope. This was at a DVD launch party - I was chatting up guys there and I had more than a few people say it to me... if it was one I would have been like "his hangups". But for multiple people to say it threw me.