how would you react if your child wanted to transition?

[LibertyHarkness]

ok chaps and girls.

well this is more for the chaps :)

question time for you .. how would you react if your child(if you have/had one) decided that they was a Woman/Male be it male to female/female to male ...

Would you support them?
Help them?
Deter Them?
Boot them out ?
Hide them away in shame ?

thoughts please ?

[3rdAlien]

I would never ever intentionally have children, but if I did I guess I would support whatever choices they made. I wouldn't mind how they turned out, aslong as they turned out happy.

[Mayrah]

I would support and help my child if i had one since im ts myself, but what i dont know is how hard it would be to cope with the fact that the daughter/son you always wanted is a boy/girl..

Oh and sorry, not a chap, but i hope you dont mind! :p

[Caff_Racer]

If I had a kid I would support his orher decision 100% and stand by him or her through thick and thin.


On another note: that's a very nice avatar you have there, Mayrah!

[darlenetv]

I think everyone should name their kids with androgynous names to make it easier if they decide to transition, e.g. Robin, Taylor, Ashley, Cameron, Casey, Devin, Jamie, Kelly, Quinn, Riley, etc

[bte]

I actually talked about this and other related subjects with this girl I was pretty heavy with. I would support my child if they were transgendered, gay, or whatever. Just because they identify with a different gender or attracted to another sex does not make them less of my child. Unfortunately, the girl I was with didn't agree eye-to-eye with me and said she would beat the gay out of the child or if the child was transgendered refuse to acknowledge that the child is transgendered.

I would hope that the guys on this board would support and help their child transition. Any guy that said they wouldn't is a serious hypocrite, but it's their choice I suppose.

[FreddieGomez]

no. i could not accept my son doing this.

[allurstouse]

would be supportive and amke sure he or she had acess to a therapist with real expertise in the area to help on their journey as well as be sure of it

[bte]

no. i could not accept my son doing this.

Why not?

[bluesoul]

no. i could not accept my son doing this.

me too

[BellaBellucci]

My son can be whoever he wants to be... even my daughter. That's what real love for a child means. It's one's job as a parent to help kids make the best of their decisions, not make ALL of their decisions for them, and certainly not to judge them. After all, by genetics and upbringing, we are inevitably responsible for making them who they are in the first place. To deny that is to live in a dream world in which a parent is always right.

Believe me: a good parent will give their child 110% whenever they can, but we're perfectly imperfect and shouldn't be expected to be any other way, and neither should our children.

~BB~

[bte]

me too

Is it because of religious beliefs or do you think that the child might regret their decision later on in life?

[Tika]

Freddie and bluesoul are just worried their kids will end up being trannychaser fodder. "Oh man look at the cock on that hot bi... DEAR LORD IT'S MY OWN CHILD!" :P

[FreddieGomez]

Why not?

i don't know. maybe because he's my son.

also i wouldnt want his pics to end up on websites like this showing his shit to the world or having him involved in prostitution.

[buttslinger]

Dammit Junior! Last week a minibike, now This? Go ask your mother...

[LibertyHarkness]

but he wouldnt be your son freddie, he would be your daughter .... you do know that the percentage of TS that work in porn/sex trade is tiny on the overal scale ...

Myself if i have transitioned in my teens when i wanted to .. i would never have got involved into any of this and just happily pushed a career in the city ....so your child wouldnt have to have their pics all over the net etc ...

does it bother you the fact you find TS sexually arousing , and perhaps that is affecting your judgement ? as it would make you feel abit perverse perhaps?

Or are you worried of peer pressure from friends/family etc .. would you not even want to let your child go have some counselling sessions with you to at least determine the full capacity of feelings?

[FreddieGomez]

I dont think he wants to be a woman.

I think i'd notice subtle hints

[LibertyHarkness]

i am talking speculatively .. as in what if ...

[bte]

i don't know. maybe because he's my son.

also i wouldnt want his pics to end up on websites like this showing his shit to the world or having him involved in prostitution.

I guess I can see your logic. As Libby pointed out not all transsexuals are involved in porn and prostitution. I have known plenty of TS who were normal, had regular jobs, and shit like that. The trans porn world is not the primary image of all transsexuals.

[Belial]

I would shackle him in the basement until he got his mind right.

[RallyCola]

i would foster their transition as early as possible.

i know, however, my wife would not be happy. to her...its all sexual fetish

[HbgDon]

ok chaps and girls.

well this is more for the chaps :)

question time for you .. how would you react if your child(if you have/had one) decided that they was a Woman/Male be it male to female/female to male ...

Would you support them?
Help them?
Deter Them?
Boot them out ?
Hide them away in shame ?

thoughts please ?

Well, I would assure my child that I love them and support them. Depending on the age of the child, I would still want them to see a psychiatrist or therapist just to talk things out and someone who had already transitioned to explain what they went through with how people act and treat others.
If the child is school age, I would probably want them to hide their desire because I know kids can be some of the meanest and nastiest people. I went through my fair share of bullying for being the fat kid. I don't think any parent wants to see their child humiliated. It has to be tough emtionally to feel like you are a woman trapped in a man's body and vice verse.

[Merkurie]

Trans, gay, lez etc. I would support my kid regardless.

Resisting your child's path just make their life much harder - or shorter.
I have also always wondered why people get so caught up in what someone else's gender or sexuality may be, that they would want to hurt them. Especially if it is your own child, but I know it happens a lot.

[nonnonnon]

since it's a choice (http://news.discovery.com/human/cynthia-nixon-chooses-gay-120127.html), I'd warn them about being ostracized

[pnwguy24]

gtfo bigots. I would love and support my child fully.

[GrimFusion]

I'd want to make sure it was a genuine deal, and I'd probably be a little more intent about that the younger the kid is, but kids never stick with anything for long if it isn't serious. Any which way it goes, the only reason I'd ever stop supporting my child is if heavy drug addiction were involved.

[Chiba5]

I would accept and support if I had my own kids someday and one of them feels like a girl born in a wrong body I'd help pay for the transition and surgery if she didn't have enough money or a job

[pimpdog]

Id pimp them out, money money money.

[bluesoul]

Is it because of religious beliefs or do you think that the child might regret their decision later on in life?

it's not something i personally would want for a member of my family. just my honest opinion as requested in the original post.

[Nicole Dupre]

i would foster their transition as early as possible.

i know, however, my wife would not be happy. to her...its all sexual fetish
Interesting. Do you consider it to be a strong marriage?

Btw what does she think of you juggling your scholarly transsexual research and you banging shemale hookers in your spare time?

[SunshyneMonroe]

One thing I know I'm blessed in is the family deportment my own family is very happy with who I am today and my aunt on my fathers side is also trans

[Ben]

ok chaps and girls.

well this is more for the chaps :)

question time for you .. how would you react if your child(if you have/had one) decided that they was a Woman/Male be it male to female/female to male ...

Would you support them?
Help them?
Deter Them?
Boot them out ?
Hide them away in shame ?

thoughts please ?

I'd support him or her. I mean, I'm left-leaning. So I have no choice -- ha ha! But, seriously, I'd support them. Totally. Completely.
I would think all -- especially on this forum -- would share my view. I don't see how anyone here could be a stringent social conservative.
I mean, if you're an ironclad social conservative, well, you shouldn't be on this site.

[BigBlackMan]

When he's 18 and out of the house he can do anything he wants.

[onmyknees]

That's a tough call Libby. You like to think you'd know how you'd react, but you never really know until you're faced with it. I can understand where Freddie's coming from, but he sounds like he's more concerned about his embarrassment than what's the right call for his kid. I'm not judging him on this subject ...just sayin. Knowing what I know about life, and how cruel it can be, part of my heart would hurt....not because of the decision, but because of the difficult times that were no doubt to come. I've heard lots of the stories on here about transition, and to be honest...I think I'd rather be back in the jungle than have to deal with what y'all did. At least there I knew who my brothers, and my enemies were. But the bottom line is love trumps all, and at that moment if you mishandle the situation...you could lose your child forever. Tough call all the way around. On the Italian side of my family, sons have disowned parents, and parents children, and the emptiness that begets seems far worse than the original sin !!

[Yvonne183]

I'd support him or her. I mean, I'm left-leaning. So I have no choice -- ha ha! But, seriously, I'd support them. Totally. Completely.
I would think all -- especially on this forum -- would share my view. I don't see how anyone here could be a stringent social conservative.
I mean, if you're an ironclad social conservative, well, you shouldn't be on this site.

I'm not jumping at your post Ben, I respect what you wrote. But not every answer can be made into a liberal/conservative stance. Some people will have an answer that shouldn't be lumped into a political group, which brings me to my answer.

I would first deter the kid and if that failed, I probably would toss his/her ass out.

I would never wish my lifestyle on any child of mine. I could never face the hardships he/she will go through in life. I seen these hardships for myself and once in a lifetime is enough for me. I would toss him/her out,, my heart couldn't stand the pain, sorry if my answer is not what some want to hear. And Ben it isn't about being a social conservative, it's about pain, I can't take any more pain in my life, selfless,, yes, maybe.

PS- I was tossed out, so maybe that influenced my answer.

[amberskyi]

i am very surprised (but why should i be on this site) how a few guys on this site would be less than supportive of their child transitioning....im sorry but to me thats a perfect example of self hate and how alot of what people hate or dont approve of things they see in themselves.
if you truly love some one its unconditional.you love the person for who they are,not who you want them to be.....

[mildcigar_2001]

I would think this would be heartbreaking for all concerned. I think all of us have hopes and dreams for our children when they are born. We want them to be good people, or good athletes. or scholars, etc. I think it is a mind-fuck for the partents when children veer off the beaten path. That being said you need to support you kids as much as possible.

As much as I love seeing the lovely girls on HA, I wouldn't want my TS kid anyplace near the world of porn, and would try to discourage such exploits (and I know this is undoutedly hipicritical on my part). As lovely as she is to look at, and seems like a nice person, would any of us want our kids to grow up to be Vanity???

[amberskyi]

I'm not jumping at your post Ben, I respect what you wrote. But not every answer can be made into a liberal/conservative stance. Some people will have an answer that shouldn't be lumped into a political group, which brings me to my answer.

I would first deter the kid and if that failed, I probably would toss his/her ass out.

I would never wish my lifestyle on any child of mine. I could never face the hardships he/she will go through in life. I seen these hardships for myself and once in a lifetime is enough for me. I would toss him/her out,, my heart couldn't stand the pain, sorry if my answer is not what some want to hear. And Ben it isn't about being a social conservative, it's about pain, I can't take any more pain in my life, selfless,, yes, maybe.

PS- I was tossed out, so maybe that influenced my answer.



SO YOU THINK TOSSING THEM OUT WOULD LESSEN THEIR PAIN?!?!? I M SORRY TO BE CRUDE BUT WHERE IN THE FUCK IS THE LOGIC IN THAT.
most of if not all of the well adjusted and successful (not porn successful) trans women i know had the support and love of their families.turning you back on your child isnt going to change who they are but just their future and chances for survival.

[Yvonne183]

SO YOU THINK TOSSING THEM OUT WOULD LESSEN THEIR PAIN?!?!? I M SORRY TO BE CRUDE BUT WHERE IN THE FUCK IS THE LOGIC IN THAT.
most of if not all of the well adjusted and successful (not porn successful) trans women i know had the support and love of their families.turning you back on your child isnt going to change who they are but just their future and chances for survival.

Sometimes there is no logic in life.

[amberskyi]

Sometimes there is no logic in life.

and thats why the world is in the state that it is...as human beings i think we can do a bit better than "*shrug* it is the way it is"

[Nicole Dupre]

That's a tough call Libby. You like to think you'd know how you'd react, but you never really know until you're faced with it. I can understand where Freddie's coming from, but he sounds like he's more concerned about his embarrassment than what's the right call for his kid. I'm not judging him on this subject ...just sayin. Knowing what I know about life, and how cruel it can be, part of my heart would hurt....not because of the decision, but because of the difficult times that were no doubt to come. I've heard lots of the stories on here about transition, and to be honest...I think I'd rather be back in the jungle than have to deal with what y'all did. At least there I knew who my brothers, and my enemies were. But the bottom line is love trumps all, and at that moment if you mishandle the situation...you could lose your child forever. Tough call all the way around. On the Italian side of my family, sons have disowned parents, and parents children, and the emptiness that begets seems far worse than the original sin !!
You'd rather be in a "jungle" surrounded by the "enemy" with your "brothers" than be a TS? lol Come on. First, are you high or drunk? What war were you supposedly ever in? Because if you say Vietnam, that would put you in your 60s, easily.

Secondly, what kind of bird brain would rather be fighting any war than either being a TS or raising one?

And why couldn't you just stand up for yourself and your kid, and tell the world to go fuck itself if they didn't like it? It's the 21st century. Grow a pair and grow up. You like sucking dick, don't you? So who are you to not support your kid for being a TS? If you couldn't deal with that, what would you do if your kid was gay?

Being a TS isn't the problem. It's other people being morons that makes our lives complicated. But I wouldn't trade my life for any of yours. Not for a second. You guys secretly sucking dicks and looking at your TS porn on the DL. Guys like that are the saddest freaks roaming the planet.

[VracerV]

Your kid is your kid. You should love them and support them no matter what. If youre willing to see and sleep with a TS girl I dont see how you could be against supporting your kid if thats what they want to do. But then again, everyone is entitled to their own opinion. Thats just mine.

[Nicole Dupre]

If you could approached your kids properly, they would probably never do porn or escort. I would hope to god that I could help my kid before I'd ever make them feel like porn and escorting was an alternative. I started selling my body because I ran away at a time when my parents were way too unprepared to deal with me. I had to teach them about transsexuality. But in all honesty, I should never have had to even consider sex work.

[onmyknees]

You'd rather be in a "jungle" surrounded by the "enemy" with your "brothers" than be a TS? lol Come on. First, are you high or drunk? What war were you supposedly ever in? Because if you say Vietnam, that would put you in your 60s, easily.

Secondly, what kind of bird brain would rather be fighting any war than either being a TS or raising one?

And why couldn't you just stand up for yourself and your kid, and tell the world to go fuck itself if they didn't like it? It's the 21st century. Grow a pair and grow up. You like sucking dick, don't you? So who are you to not support your kid for being a TS? If you couldn't deal with that, what would you do if your kid was gay?

Being a TS isn't the problem. It's other people being morons that makes our lives complicated. But I wouldn't trade my life for any of yours. Not for a second. You guys secretly sucking dicks and looking at your TS porn on the DL. Guys like that are the saddest freaks roaming the planet.


you missed my point....you tend to do that alot with me.....but this is the internet and sometimes inflection and intent can not be fully conveyed in writing.....my point simply was, partially tongue in cheek, that the world is a very unkind place and changing gender can't be easy. Capisce ?


And btw....is there a period of time during the year when you don't act like a cunt? I mean if it's not holy week....when is it?Maybe we could have a conversation then... lmao

[buttslinger]

I hope I'm not repeating myself, but I grew up with two guys (from 1st grade and 3rd grade) that turned out to be gay. One was wild, the other a sissy. They were both weird kids. But we hung out. The only real problems were when other friends got involved. (you like that guy??)
The plot only thickens: their parents were also weird. Just like when hoods have mean parents. So lots of the strum and drang was coming not from the outside world but the inside world. I don't care who you are, your parents are the most important people in your life.

[Willie Escalade]

I would support them no matter what...especially with the knowledge I have on the situation.

[BluegrassCat]

I think if my son or daughter were trans I'd go through a period of mourning for my "lost" son or daughter and it might take a while to come to terms with it in my own head. But that's my shit, not my kid's. It's the parent's job to take care of their kid and not let their own hangups be an extra burden on their children. So even if I'm initially thrown, I'm the adult and I'm totally going to support my kid in any way they need me.

[EvonRose]

I would hope anyone in this forum would support them, if not, then it's highly hypocritical....

[Nicole Dupre]

you missed my point....you tend to do that alot with me.....but this is the internet and sometimes inflection and intent can not be fully conveyed in writing.....my point simply was, partially tongue in cheek, that the world is a very unkind place and changing gender can't be easy. Capisce ?


And btw....is there a period of time during the year when you don't act like a cunt? I mean if it's not holy week....when is it?Maybe we could have a conversation then... lmao
For someone who's so opinionated, you sure don't communicate very well. What was your point? I'm only reading what you're typing. Usually people are pretty clear when they speak about their kids and how they raise them.

But ok. The world can be an unkind place. That's something everyone should remember if and when they're procreating. But simply imparting the lesson, verbally or by example, that "life can suck" to a child is not best default approach to parenting imo.

And I don't give a rat's ass about Easter, minus my wardrobe changing with the season and enjoying spending the day with my family. It has no impact on how well I treat people. I'm not an egoless cult member. I'm a good person 24/7/365. I don't need a church telling me how to treat my fellow human beings. "Capisce"?

That's the reason I can unconditionally love my niece and nephews, and my own children if I ever had them, if the world ever decides to place it's ugly "LGBT" label on them. But me; I don't see people like that EVER. I see everyone as a unique individual until they prove otherwise to me. I don't go around dividing people up for my own conveniences, using some "us and them" philosophy like some people I talk to. For me, everyone potentially has equal value in the world.

[Fancy fancy]

too right pretty lady




I would hope anyone in this forum would support them, if not, then it's highly hypocritical....

[Yvonne183]

Maybe a re-write of my original post here might clear things up a bit but even with nice words the results would be the same.

I would never, ever have a kid in the first place. Someone who has attempted suicide twice and visited the local mental ward would not make a good candidate for raising any kids let alone a transgender one.

Maybe using the phrase "toss out" is wrong but that was the option in the original post. Maybe the phrase "Toss out" could mean to give the kid up for adoption or have a family member raise the kid. It doesn't have to mean toss on the streets as I was. If I had a kid, he/she would probably be "tossed out"(adopted) whether it was transgender or not. I am unable to raise any kids. And this isn't being mean, many people in society give their kids up for adoption, this is not something that I was the sole person involved in. People also have abortions when they are not able to raise a kid, adoption is another option.

I do know that life could be good for a transgender person, possibly even better than in my days when young. but if that was so then there wouldn't be needed support groups for the transgender. If being trans was "normal" then a trans person just live their lives like anyone else, without special support. I said before that I could not endure the hardship of raising a trans kid. I could not handle having the kid cry to me when people hurt him/her. I am not a strong person, I would rather die than to so my kid being hurt, in my mental state I would be unable to give him/her the loving that they needed. I would rather "toss out"(adopted) the kid to someone who is better able to give the kid what he/she needs in life.

Another thing left out of my post would be the age of the child maybe the age would ,make some kind of difference, I don't know. In my opinion, the answer to the question is not as simple as saying yes without any type of thought process. It is a question that would take much thought before a real answer could be given, much more thought than one can give on a porn forum. In my first post, i am only guilty of making a fast post that could have used better wording. Maybe I used better words in this post, but the result would be the same, I could not raise a trans child.

Y'all have a nice life, hope you are better able than me to face life's obstacle.
bye

[Yvonne183]

An add on. If being trans was "normal" then the guys on the site would put up pics of themselves cause they should have no shame being on a trans site. Even among people who say they are tolerant there is a fear of being associated with trans people.

[Willie Escalade]

An add on. If being trans was "normal" then the guys on the site would put up pics of themselves cause they should have no shame being on a trans site. Even among people who say they are tolerant there is a fear of being associated with trans people.
I've done that...and I'm not afraid of the association.

And I would still support my child, no matter what.

[amberskyi]

Maybe a re-write of my original post here might clear things up a bit but even with nice words the results would be the same.

I would never, ever have a kid in the first place. Someone who has attempted suicide twice and visited the local mental ward would not make a good candidate for raising any kids let alone a transgender one.

Maybe using the phrase "toss out" is wrong but that was the option in the original post. Maybe the phrase "Toss out" could mean to give the kid up for adoption or have a family member raise the kid. It doesn't have to mean toss on the streets as I was. If I had a kid, he/she would probably be "tossed out"(adopted) whether it was transgender or not. I am unable to raise any kids. And this isn't being mean, many people in society give their kids up for adoption, this is not something that I was the sole person involved in. People also have abortions when they are not able to raise a kid, adoption is another option.

I do know that life could be good for a transgender person, possibly even better than in my days when young. but if that was so then there wouldn't be needed support groups for the transgender. If being trans was "normal" then a trans person just live their lives like anyone else, without special support. I said before that I could not endure the hardship of raising a trans kid. I could not handle having the kid cry to me when people hurt him/her. I am not a strong person, I would rather die than to so my kid being hurt, in my mental state I would be unable to give him/her the loving that they needed. I would rather "toss out"(adopted) the kid to someone who is better able to give the kid what he/she needs in life.

Another thing left out of my post would be the age of the child maybe the age would ,make some kind of difference, I don't know. In my opinion, the answer to the question is not as simple as saying yes without any type of thought process. It is a question that would take much thought before a real answer could be given, much more thought than one can give on a porn forum. In my first post, i am only guilty of making a fast post that could have used better wording. Maybe I used better words in this post, but the result would be the same, I could not raise a trans child.

Y'all have a nice life, hope you are better able than me to face life's obstacle.
bye

firstly i want to congratulate you on being honest enough with yourself to know that you wouldnt make a great parent.as a child of a parent who struggled with mental/emotional illness life was far from mary poppins.
however i disagree with everything else you said.in this day and age of complete diversity there is no longer a standard,across the board norm.whats normal for you isnt normal to your middle eastern neighbors down the street or too the gay couple two blocks away raising a kid.times have changed drastically and are continuing to change.kids are coming out earlier (as gay or trans) and living well adjusted lives (mostly free from ridicule).
i was EXTREMELY feminine (cringe at the thought of those days lol) and flamboyant my whole life and the only ostracism i really ever experienced was from my own family.who knows if i had their support i wouldnt be a ts porn star/escort but finishing up a degree,starting a career.
as a parent its your job to endure hard ships.....

[amberskyi]

i've done that...and i'm not afraid of the association.

And i would still support my child, no matter what.

***thumbs up***

[amberskyi]

An add on. If being trans was "normal" then the guys on the site would put up pics of themselves cause they should have no shame being on a trans site. Even among people who say they are tolerant there is a fear of being associated with trans people.

ignorant people have a fear of all things different...its not limited to just us..
i personally keep my association with ignorant people limited

[werwt22]

Love is love. But just because i love you doesnt mean i have to suppprt every decision you make. What father wants a gay or transgender child? Its not like people say "Hey I hope my kid turns out gay" ya know. Everyone is acting like accepting this issue is easy as deciding what to have for dinner. Its a difficult decision to make. All I can do is raise my child right, and if thats the decision they choose to make when theyre an adult, then so be it. But im sorry...im accepting and respectful of other transgender and gay people, but its just not what i want for my child.

[amberskyi]

Love is love. But just because i love you doesnt mean i have to suppprt every decision you make. What father wants a gay or transgender child? Its not like people say "Hey I hope my kid turns out gay" ya know. Everyone is acting like accepting this issue is easy as deciding what to have for dinner. Its a difficult decision to make. All I can do is raise my child right, and if thats the decision they choose to make when theyre an adult, then so be it. But im sorry...im accepting and respectful of other transgender and gay people, but its just not what i want for my child.

actually i would hope most people would want their children to turn out as happy,well adjusted adults no matter what path in life they embark on......*shurg*

[FreddieGomez]

From what i've seen from the trans community online, i would be worried for my son if he chose this path. I wouldn't want him to resort to turning himself into a fetish to survive.

But I know my family would most likely accept him.

[amberskyi]

From what i've seen from the trans community online, i would be worried for my son if he chose this path. I wouldn't want him to resort to turning himself into a fetish to survive.

But I know my family would most likely accept him.

See...I knew you were capable of thoughtful and insightful answers....
Based on what you GLIMPSED online (which is far from a representation of the Trans community as a whole) it should show you how important a supportive family would be.

[Merkurie]

Another point:

If my child wanted to transition, I would hope that I would not be surprised. I think any parent should notice that their child was "gender non-conforming", it should not come as a shock, unless you are blind or your kid is afraid to be themselves around you.

[werwt22]

actually i would hope most people would want their children to turn out as happy,well adjusted adults no matter what path in life they embark on......*shurg*

i do. im not wishing ill-will on any kid who chooses that path. Im just saying i want my kid to grow up and live a normal life. Who doesnt? And lets face it...being transgender is a difficult life to live, escorting or not. Its only natural for a parent to want to protect theyre child from any and all harm.

[EvonRose]

From what i've seen from the trans community online, i would be worried for my son if he chose this path. I wouldn't want him to resort to turning himself into a fetish to survive.

But I know my family would most likely accept him.

Most of us resort to the industry because of the lack of support, the more you should support your child for this reason...

Many women become strippers, and pornstars for the same exact purpose.

Broken homes, divorced, abuse, bullied, not accepted, lack of support from family... etc...

I came from a very blessed and famous family in the Phillippines, if my dad had supported me No question in my mind I wouldn't be here...

[Mayrah]

From what i've seen from the trans community online, i would be worried for my son if he chose this path. I wouldn't want him to resort to turning himself into a fetish to survive.

But I know my family would most likely accept him.

The online trans porn community is only a minority in numbers from all the transsexual women out there. Take a look on normal transgender websites, they are all normal people living in their daily life talking/supporting people in their transition. Its completely the opposite of what you see on the "shemale" sites.

[Mayrah]

Another point:

If my child wanted to transition, I would hope that I would not be surprised. I think any parent should notice that their child was "gender non-conforming", it should not come as a shock, unless you are blind or your kid is afraid to be themselves around you.


Most of us resort to the industry because of the lack of support, the more you should support your child for this reason...

Many women become strippers, and pornstars for the same exact purpose.

Broken homes, divorced, abuse, bullied, not accepted, lack of support from family... etc...

I came from a very blessed and famous family in the Phillippines, if my dad had supported me No question in my mind I wouldn't be here...

I actually knew from very young that i always wanted to be a women, i would hate myself looking in the mirror. Around 8/9 my mom got into a relationship and that man was very violent, hitting her but sometimes me as well and that made me suppress all my feelings untill i was 19. So no it wassent that obvious..

But yes, i come from a broken home because my parents divorced when i was 1, i got abused by my step dad, i was bullied in school and i was never accepted as a normal person at school.. Is that the reason why am attracted to sites like this? i dont know. *shrugs*

[BigBlackMan]

lol What war did omk fight in? Does this war involve a keyboard and mouse?

[EvonRose]

I actually knew from very young that i always wanted to be a women, i would hate myself looking in the mirror. Around 8/9 my mom got into a relationship and that man was very violent, hitting her but sometimes me as well and that made me suppress all my feelings untill i was 19. So no it wassent that obvious..

But yes, i come from a broken home because my parents divorced when i was 1, i got abused by my step dad, i was bullied in school and i was never accepted as a normal person at school.. Is that the reason why am attracted to sites like this? i dont know. *shrugs*

I meant the negative lifestyle aspect of it with the industry, drugs, and nasty people. Not this site. lol... I love you tough.

[Merkurie]

I actually knew from very young that i always wanted to be a women, i would hate myself looking in the mirror. Around 8/9 my mom got into a relationship and that man was very violent, hitting her but sometimes me as well and that made me suppress all my feelings untill i was 19. So no it wassent that obvious..

But yes, i come from a broken home because my parents divorced when i was 1, i got abused by my step dad, i was bullied in school and i was never accepted as a normal person at school.. Is that the reason why am attracted to sites like this? i dont know. *shrugs*

I am sorry to read that you had to go through that growing up. You seem like a level headed and caring person in spite of that however.

My parents divorced when I was 3 and while there was no abuse in my family, my parents. were very determined that I be "normal", to the point of being very blind to who I really was and hostile to any "queerness". I was never like the other boys,always androgynous and sending mixed signals, feeling more like a tomboy than anything else, and suffered a lot of bullying (even from family) and later got into a lot of fights. It made me into a tough little MF, but never really straightened me out.

Treating your kids like crap, just so they are'nt queer, is just a waste of life.

[Dino Velvet]

For me I really don't know. I would want any child of mine to be happy and protected from as much hardship and misery as possible. One thing I might do is set up some sort of account next to his/her college money. That money is to be used for whatever things necessary so my child doesn't have to participate in anything illegal or feel is degrading/disrespectful. Let my child be the best and most well adjusted transsexual they could be.

[BellaBellucci]

Another point:

If my child wanted to transition, I would hope that I would not be surprised. I think any parent should notice that their child was "gender non-conforming", it should not come as a shock, unless you are blind or your kid is afraid to be themselves around you.

+1. It's a shame how many parents are more concerned about raising clones than kids. Parenting is about using boundaries to help a child discover who they are for themselves, not about telling them who to be based on ones own ego. When you have kids, you check that at the door and protect their personal growth. Period.

So other than me, how many of you Dr. Spocks actually have children of your own? Maybe a few? This thread is silly because most of you lack the necessary perspective to discuss it. Sorry, but that's the truth, and as such I'm actually quite disappointed that my previous post here has gone largely ignored. *sigh*

~BB~

[Quiet Reflections]

If my kid walked up to me and said he or she wanted to transition I would sit him or her down and calmly explain that he or she would still have to cut the grass, do chores and keep their grades up. Then I would ask him or her what he or she wants for dinner on said night. There wouldn't be any talk about my support i'm sure they would already know they have it. Now if my kid wanted to go to college on my dime for theater,philosophy, or communications I might throw him out of my house.

[buttslinger]

I'm actually quite disappointed that my previous post here has gone largely ignored. *sigh*

Put more T&A in your Avatar.!!!


Everybody's a good parent til the divorce, the drinking, and the bills that kill.
Every kid is a good kid til the tantrums, the report cards, the creepy friends.

I think maybe a good parent would know if a kid needed to "transition" before the kid did, but, damn, kids can't make a decision like that! It depends on the parents you're stuck with. Maybe even the neighborhood you live in. Street kids can be mean.

[Merkurie]

+1. It's a shame how many parents are more concerned about raising clones than kids. Parenting is about using boundaries to help a child discover who they are for themselves, not about telling them who to be based on ones own ego. When you have kids, you check that at the door and protect their personal growth. Period.

So other than me, how many of you Dr. Spocks actually have children of your own? Maybe a few? This thread is silly because most of you lack the necessary perspective to discuss it. Sorry, but that's the truth, and as such I'm actually quite disappointed that my previous post here has gone largely ignored. *sigh*

~BB~
Well said.

I dont have any kids, thats why I said "I hope" I would respond etc. I dont know if having kids make you forget what your own childhood was like and cause you to become close minded, but I am not sure.

Most of the open minded accepting people I know do not have kids. But all of the the conforming authoritarians I know do have kids. But I do notice that parents who raise their children in a more "open" fashion, come under a lot of heat from their peers. People are not shy about telling other people what they ought to be doing with their children.

[BellaBellucci]

Well said.

I dont have any kids, thats why I said "I hope" I would respond etc. I dont know if having kids make you forget what your own childhood was like and cause you to become close minded, but I am not sure.

Most of the open minded accepting people I know do not have kids. But all of the the conforming authoritarians I know do have kids. But I do notice that parents who raise their children in a more "open" fashion, come under a lot of heat from their peers. People are not shy about telling other people what they ought to be doing with their children.

Well I've explained it to my son this way: there was a cycle of abuse in my family because the adults saw children as possessions and my being different made it worse... but also that the cycle ended with me and he will be protected to be whomever he wants to be, provided there aren't negative outside influences of course (hence 'boundaries').

In short, my being abused had a silver lining in that it taught me how NEVER to raise a child.

~BB~

[werwt22]

Well I've explained it to my son this way: there was a cycle of abuse in my family because the adults saw children as possessions and my being different made it worse... but also that the cycle ended with me and he will be protected to be whomever he wants to be, provided there aren't negative outside influences of course (hence 'boundaries').

In short, my being abused had a silver lining in that it taught me how NEVER to raise a child.

~BB~

Yes, but it sounds like your overcompensating. You still have to be a parent. If you want your child to be a "free spirit" cool, but you still have to guide your children in the best direction possible. I understand you wanting to support your child because you love them and would do anything for them but blindly supporting a "childs" decision is not the way to go. They need guidance. And its your responsibility to guide them in the right direction. And in all honesty, if your child is considering being Transgender then im sure it doesnt matter what you decide. That train must have left the station long ago.

[EvonRose]

I think that many people are so ignorant, You don't choose to be a transgender, you don't choose to be male or female, you don't choose to live with any type of deformity, It is a must to have that corrected if mentally it does not make you happy. Below, someone says "if your child chooses to be"

You don't choose plain and simple.

However you choose to be a great parent and let your child be happy, or be a bad parent and risk your child being another statistic. And in my case i wish my dad chose to be a better parent, because I became a statistic.

No body chooses a life full of discrimination, hatred, No one wants to lose family, or friends, or to be mocked an humiliated for the rest of their lives. If you think this is a choice, you are highly mistaken.

[Nicole Dupre]

I think that many people are so ignorant, You don't choose to be a transgender, you don't choose to be male or female, you don't choose to live with any type of deformity, It is a must to have that corrected if mentally it does not make you happy. Below, someone says "if your child chooses to be"

You don't choose plain and simple.

However you choose to be a great parent and let your child be happy, or be a bad parent and risk your child being another statistic. And in my case i wish my dad chose to be a better parent, because I became a statistic.

No body chooses a life full of discrimination, hatred, No one wants to lose family, or friends, or to be mocked an humiliated for the rest of their lives. If you think this is a choice, you are highly mistaken.
I'd be curious to know how GID gets diagnosed using Freud's structural model of the psyche, and what differences, if any, become evident when using the concepts of primary and secondary transsexualism.

[pimpdog]

EvonRose wouldnt pass as a boy, period, the waist is to small, joints, facial structure, among other things, I think with some it even goes past the mentally being female.

[Nicole Dupre]

Now if my kid wanted to go to college on my dime for theater,philosophy, or communications I might throw him out of my house. lmao

[BellaBellucci]

Yes, but it sounds like your overcompensating. You still have to be a parent. If you want your child to be a "free spirit" cool, but you still have to guide your children in the best direction possible. I understand you wanting to support your child because you love them and would do anything for them but blindly supporting a "childs" decision is not the way to go. They need guidance. And its your responsibility to guide them in the right direction. And in all honesty, if your child is considering being Transgender then im sure it doesnt matter what you decide. That train must have left the station long ago.

I've alluded that there is a balance to be achieved between free-spiritedness and protection in 3 separate posts on this issue. I'm not overcompensating; you're just looking for flaws.

Do you even have children?!

~BB~

[buttslinger]

Curb Your Enthusiasm - "I think he might be gay..." - Season 8 Ep. 10 - YouTube (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBmw_dvhnpk)

[werwt22]

I've alluded that there is a balance to be achieved between free-spiritedness and protection in 3 separate posts on this issue. I'm not overcompensating; you're just looking for flaws.

Do you even have children?!

~BB~

Of my own no, but i've raised 3. Im not looking for flaws...just saying we need to keep our own personal views from interfering with raising a healthy child. Im not calling you out specifically, IJS,

[BellaBellucci]

Of my own no, but i've raised 3. Im not looking for flaws...just saying we need to keep our own personal views from interfering with raising a healthy child. Im not calling you out specifically, IJS,

Fair enough then. :)

~BB~