A question for S&M players

[Erika1487]

As some of you know I am Masochist.
I am fairly new S&M scene, but it seems the more pain and humiliation the better the sexual gratification. I have been cained, paddled, whipped, spanked, cut with a razor and forced breast pain. None of this has come close to push me towards any limit, so I guess I don't have one right now. Mostly I find that the few dommes I have worked with are not that skilled, physically strong, and have been more than bit disappointing. Imo it would take special type of domme to take me to my limit who is psychologically strong, skilled and physically stronger than me.. A rare thing indeed.
The question is if your a Masochist do you have a limit, or the more unbridled pain that can be delivered the better the experience no matter the physical cost?
If you’re a Sadist have you ever driven a sub/masochist so hard that you beat them unconscious before they met their limit?
Or do you feel that S&M play should always have ‘safewords and nonverbal signals’ and agreed upon limits before play starts?

[tao1kiku]

For me, pain threshold is based on safe, sane and consensual with safe words. Sometimes one can go farther than they every thought possible, and on different nights not as much.

[Silcc69]

No thanks I shall pass on pain.

[lovesall]

Erika, I have and still are in the BDSM scene. By the looks of your pictures and background story you are very hardcore in your lifestyle, which is great. I mainly dom but also sub, as the old saying goes you must start at the bottom and work your way up. My advice to you is that you should never play without a safe word and find a Dom who cares. No Dom should beat beat someone to the point of unconscious for safety sake. Remember a Master or Mistress must understand his or her slave and the slave is under their care, yes I have made slaves use their safe word and aftercare was given. My bottom line is be picky of your Master Or Mistress just don't go for someone who intends to beat you to the point of no return, leaving you serously injured, because it can happen. But my all means have a grand old safe and consensual time!

[NatashaLover]

As a Pro-Domme for many years I rarely have to go to extremes to satisfy myself first and try to satisfy my slaves. Also there is a fine line between what you are mentioning and being injured in a bad way or even dying from an infection or something else. Some of us will consider those and have it as a limit to the things that we would do to a slave/sub. I thing you need more phycological pain and thats what other Dommes are missing on. I use safe words almost half of my session specially on new subs until I get to know them better, so you should keep going to the same Domme for a few sessions before chenging to a new one so they get to know your limits and know you better so they can know where to take you.
good luck on your search for freedom, or is that the beggining of slavery. :)

[Quiet Reflections]

I like a pain but barbed wire whips and lips ringed shut are a bit much even for me.

[Erika1487]

Erika, I have and still are in the BDSM scene. By the looks of your pictures and background story you are very hardcore in your lifestyle, which is great. I mainly dom but also sub, as the old saying goes you must start at the bottom and work your way up. My advice to you is that you should never play without a safe word and find a Dom who cares. No Dom should beat beat someone to the point of unconscious for safety sake. Remember a Master or Mistress must understand his or her slave and the slave is under their care, yes I have made slaves use their safe word and aftercare was given. My bottom line is be picky of your Master Or Mistress just don't go for someone who intends to beat you to the point of no return, leaving you serously injured, because it can happen. But my all means have a grand old safe and consensual time!

Thanks for the advice:) I have not been so picky about my dommes and got kind of fustrated with how the sessions went. I think that if I can find some one who fits my needs and stick with them a few sessions we will find a better chemistry.

[lovesall]

Thanks for the advice:) I have not been so picky about my dommes and got kind of fustrated with how the sessions went. I think that if I can find some one who fits my needs and stick with them a few sessions we will find a better chemistry.
No problem, yes find someone who will understand your needs and stick with them, remember comunication is key and soon it will be heaven or hell!

[Erika1487]

As a Pro-Domme for many years I rarely have to go to extremes to satisfy myself first and try to satisfy my slaves. Also there is a fine line between what you are mentioning and being injured in a bad way or even dying from an infection or something else. Some of us will consider those and have it as a limit to the things that we would do to a slave/sub. I thing you need more phycological pain and thats what other Dommes are missing on. I use safe words almost half of my session specially on new subs until I get to know them better, so you should keep going to the same Domme for a few sessions before chenging to a new one so they get to know your limits and know you better so they can know where to take you.[QUOTE]
Thanks for the advice Natasha :) I love humiliation and have been fustrated with the ablity of the dommes I have used to incroprate that in our play:(
[QUOTE=NatashaLover;1073714]good luck on your search for freedom, or is that the beggining of slavery. :) Ya know it's funny I love pain and humiliation, but have never been, broken to the point of submission...not yet anyway;)

[Yvonne183]

I'm into receiving pain. It's one of my psychological defects which I probably got from an early age of abuse and now I crave pain. I even self inflict pain on myself when I have no partner to do the deed.
I have been beaten down many times into complete submission, that's how my last bf controlled me so much, he knew where it hurts and it felt so good, but I am scared of him, he doesn't love me and he is careless. I have a recurring dream that one day I will be beaten to death. I kinda think being beaten to death will be the ultimate fantasy, bad thing, I can only do it once.

But Erika, that is only me, you got to find your place in this world.

[Erika1487]

I'm into receiving pain. It's one of my psychological defects which I probably got from an early age of abuse and now I crave pain. I even self inflict pain on myself when I have no partner to do the deed.
I have been beaten down many times into complete submission, that's how my last bf controlled me so much, he knew where it hurts and it felt so good, but I am scared of him, he doesn't love me and he is careless. I have a recurring dream that one day I will be beaten to death. I kinda think being beaten to death will be the ultimate fantasy, bad thing, I can only do it once.

But Erika, that is only me, you got to find your place in this world.

I thought you might lean towards the masochist side. I have had many screwed up sexual experinces in my past and have always leaned towards people who have punishied me in some way. I now openly seek punishment, I just have not found anything that satified me other than pain & humiliation.
I don't know where it ends for me, but I am sure it's going to take me some strange places ;)

[Yvonne183]

I thought you might lean towards the masochist side. I have had many screwed up sexual experinces in my past and have always leaned towards people who have punishied me in some way. I now openly seek punishment, I just have not found anything that satified me other than pain & humiliation.
I don't know where it ends for me, but I am sure it's going to take me some strange places ;)

Be careful, there are some strange and dangerous dudes in the S&M world, some of them make Dino look like Donny Osmond. Stay safe.

[Erika1487]

Be careful, there are some strange and dangerous dudes in the S&M world, some of them make Dino look like Donny Osmond. Stay safe.

I will be safe or at least try to be as much as possible in S&M.
I have seen some pretty nasty things so far I can only imagne what you have access to things in Ny. It would have been cool if Nicole was still around she would have a lot to say about this thread.

[seamonkey]

It's too bad you don't live near San Francisco, the BDSM capital of the world, according to some, including me. I lived there for 20 years and was active in the scene for awhile. There are support groups, clubs, workshops, therapists, street fairs, etc. of all kinds, so the BDSM culture is very well infused with safe, sane consensual ethics. Since the culture is more open there, it's probably easier to find partners a well. But then the internet has levelled things a lot on that count.

[Erika1487]

It's too bad you don't live near San Francisco, the BDSM capital of the world, according to some, including me. I lived there for 20 years and was active in the scene for awhile. There are support groups, clubs, workshops, therapists, street fairs, etc. of all kinds, so the BDSM culture is very well infused with safe, sane consensual ethics. Since the culture is more open there, it's probably easier to find partners a well. But then the internet has levelled things a lot on that count.
I have heard that SF has a virbant BDSM scene. Ever since kink.com came out I have wanted to go out to the SF Armory.