commitment????

[sd123223]

Anyone out there who is or has been in a relationship and slept with TS or GGs on the side and then gotten married in the hope that they will stop cheating whether it's with TS, X Dressers or GG's? How long did you stay monogamous? is it wishful thinking to think if you put a ring on someones finger you will be able to remain monogamous? anyone gone through stuff like this? or of you are in relationship how do you reconcile, forgive yourself and not feel guilty if you play and fool around???

i have a gf but have a secret side where i go to gay clubs and pick up trans girls and on the odd occasion have paid for it i love the gay scene and people but my gal is very homely and girl next door type.

if i commit to this girl i wanna stop straying i delated all my tranny fb friends and have avoided texting and hook ups the 1st couple months but man it is tough does it get any easier with time??? (and i do realise cheating is cheAting GGs or TS)

lots of trans know me here in Oz and lots are keen to hook up (i am a nice guy, keep in shape etc) and it is like i live two lives sorry for the rambling but would like advice or to hear frOm anyone else out there

thanks

[GrimFusion]

My ex once found my porn stash. I thought I was in for a mad bitch session, but she admitted she was curious about the whole thing, too. We're broken up now, but for other reasons. You might just want to come out and tell her but leave out the whole "cheating" thing. See if she's down to participate every once in a while. Then, you won't have to worry about running out and cheating on her. You'll just have to share.

If there's no way in hell she would be down, then talk about some anal action and keep your fetish limited to porn.

[sd123223]

thanks grim words of wisdom appreciate it

cheers

[FreddieGomez]

a man who likes trannies wont stay monogamous to either unless he's "gay"

[sd123223]

thanks Viper, so if I assume their are lots of guys on here who are married and see TS on the side, so how do they reconcile or not feel guilty doing it pt their girlfriends wives????

really appreciate your post and you are right for me it's like a drug for me trannies and random sex at clubs jsut not sure if i need to treat it like an addiction
she actually caught me once years back smelt the perfume on my clothes i told her she only gave me a bj nothing mor she forgave me then maybe that was my chance to open up and tell her but the reaction I got then tells me she wuldnt be acepting of my sexual likings for trans

leading double life can be stressful for sure, i just wdner how many TS can I sleep with or wil l iever be staisfied or is it the thrill of the chase more than the sex???
thanks

[sd123223]

thanks Freddie I did love the film Do the Right Thing!!!!

[nicebrn]

thanks Viper, so if I assume their are lots of guys on here who are married and see TS on the side, so how do they reconcile or not feel guilty doing it pt their girlfriends wives????The first person I told about my trans-attraction was my ex-wife while we were still courting. I didn't tell her that I'd had a few experiences before we had met, though. I still feel guilty about that, though I didn't stray one bit while we were together and was completely honest about everything else.

Sadly we fell apart for other reasons.
leading double life can be stressful for sure, i just wdner how many TS can I sleep with or wil l iever be staisfied or is it the thrill of the chase more than the sex???
thanksI couldn't do it. In less than two years, I got overwhelmed by the stress of dating transgirls without anyone close to me knowing. I just couldn't handle the guilt of constantly hiding a major part of my personality from the people I supposedly care most about.

IMO, you probably won't ever be satisfied, because I think it is the thrill that you really like. On the other hand, like any other addiction, the only way to kick it is to kick it. Burn your bridges like you've already partially done by deleting your hookup contacts. Finish up by telling her of your attraction. You may not wanna tell her everything...but you should consider it, because if you're known on the scene like you say you are, it'll probably come out eventually.

[BigDF]

Anyone out there who is or has been in a relationship and slept with TS or GGs on the side and then gotten married in the hope that they will stop cheating whether it's with TS, X Dressers or GG's? How long did you stay monogamous? is it wishful thinking to think if you put a ring on someones finger you will be able to remain monogamous? anyone gone through stuff like this? or of you are in relationship how do you reconcile, forgive yourself and not feel guilty if you play and fool around???

i have a gf but have a secret side where i go to gay clubs and pick up trans girls and on the odd occasion have paid for it i love the gay scene and people but my gal is very homely and girl next door type.

if i commit to this girl i wanna stop straying i delated all my tranny fb friends and have avoided texting and hook ups the 1st couple months but man it is tough does it get any easier with time??? (and i do realise cheating is cheAting GGs or TS)

lots of trans know me here in Oz and lots are keen to hook up (i am a nice guy, keep in shape etc) and it is like i live two lives sorry for the rambling but would like advice or to hear frOm anyone else out there

thanks

Monogamy is a choice you make every time you look at another person. I've been married 21 years now and although I've been tempted several times, I've never cheated on my wife, a GG.I fantasize about having sex with trannies, but I can't go back on the promise I made to my wife. But that's me. Everyone is different.

The tone of your post suggests that you aren't ready to settle down yet and I think you should give that a little more thought. If it's that tough to stay faithful to your girlfriend and you think of her as homely as opposed to beautiful, then perhaps she isn't the one for you. Better to make that decision now before breaking a promise later on. This is my second marriage, I was married seven years the first time and let me tell you divorce is very tough on a person, especially on the one who is left.

Look to your own heart and be honest with yourself, first. Then look at your gf and decide whether you really want to risk breaking her heart.

[sd123223]

thanks just googled madonna complex i think Tiger Woods may have that! i think i may too.

i appreciate your advice and honesty, i think we wil lboth get drunk and i wil ltell her i am ttracted to ts but not go into too much details of pst conquests, i feel that its about weighing up wht do i want? sweet life with sweet girl or promiscious sex week in and week out?

boy i have a lot of thinking to do!

[sd123223]

thanks BigDN and nicebrn i used to only come to this site to jack off to porn lol but now i see the valaue of the internet and more specifically this site I really appreciate all your thougths and have some strategies nd REAL thinking to do I think it would make a great 'Dr Phil' episode shame I am in Australia!!!
Big DF cn I ask how old you are? and have you been with TS before you were married both times? as i thik it is amazing if you cn be content with just fantasising about trans without going thru with it. much respect to you if that is the case!

i am not in a hurry to get married but i know my gf is looking for a committment after 6 years of being with me!

[Odelay]

Read Sex at Dawn, by Christopher Ryan, and then encourage your wife to read it too. It could change how you and/or your wife thinks about monogamy. He makes some good arguments about why man is not inherently a monogamous being.

[giovanni_hotel]

You and your girl need to role play, have her dress up in trashy wigs, skimpy street walker gear and overdone make-up....and.....start fuccing her in the ass!!!

I know you don't, and I know she probably doesn't swallow to completion either. Unfulfilling sex is the cause of most infidelity in monogamous relationships, IMO.

For guys who are truly bi-, (TGs and GGs equally turn them on), that's a tough deal.
But a str8 dude has the same issues, in which case, if you aren't ready to commit, why are you contemplating marriage??
Is it because you feel it's 'time'? Want kids??

You need to freak up your sex life and see how that works.

[fred41]

You and your girl need to role play, have her dress up in trashy wigs, skimpy street walker gear and overdone make-up....and.....start fuccing her in the ass!!!

I know you don't, and I know she probably doesn't swallow to completion either. Unfulfilling sex is the cause of most infidelity in monogamous relationships, IMO.

For guys who are truly bi-, (TGs and GGs equally turn them on), that's a tough deal.
But a str8 dude has the same issues, in which case, if you aren't ready to commit, why are you contemplating marriage??
Is it because you feel it's 'time'? Want kids??

You need to freak up your sex life and see how that works.

There's a lot of truth in this post...couples in long term relationships need to spice it up every now and then..or be satisfied with a dwindling sex life...(which IRL is perfectly okay with couples where the man starts losing drive in his later years and so does the wife...even though viagra fucked this up for a lot of couples).

....but I would say that in your particular case thoughts of marriage are probably very premature. I think it would be a mistake to try to think up ways of fixing a marriage before the vows are ever exchanged. You might also want to explore whether or not you are really in love with this lady... a lot of people can't honestly tell the difference between being in love with someone and just liking a person a lot.

All that being said, I believe monogamy is very important in a marriage. When you cheat on a wife it will destroy her feeling of self worth because, to her...it's like saying "she's not really worth the extra effort it takes to remain faithful". Men don't have many sacrifices to offer up in exchange for a woman's commitment nowadays. Protecting ones family isn't as much of an issue in modern times...and we no longer have to hunt and gather, especially since in today's world both partners usually hold some type of employment. The only real sacrifice that's left to make for a person to prove your love for...is fidelity. Yes, it's extremely difficult..for some ...almost impossible...but that's exactly why it means so much when you can do it for a person. It shows that you value that person enough to try to only be intimate with them. People that aren't even willing to try this , in my opinion..are probably better off just living together.

[nonnonnon]

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article77126.ece

[amberskyi]

a man who likes trannies wont stay monogamous to either unless he's "gay"

im sorry but WHAT THE FUCK is that supposed to mean?!?!

[Deja Vu]

commitment is hard

[FreddieGomez]

im sorry but WHAT THE FUCK is that supposed to mean?!?!

like if a dude likes trannies and females is "straight" but a dude who ONLY likes trannies and not females is "gay"

[amberskyi]

like if a dude likes trannies and females is "straight" but a dude who ONLY likes trannies and not females is "gay"

so a guy could never be in a relationship because seeing us as women and people is gay?? nigga your a douche.ive dated two guys seriously and trust me they make YOU look like the fag.

[FreddieGomez]

so a guy could never be in a relationship because seeing us as women and people is gay?? nigga your a douche.ive dated two guys seriously and trust me they make YOU look like the fag.

you're not comprehending...it's not like the dude is gay and likes dudes, but if he only likes trannies and not pussy too, he's obviously not str8 or have st8 tendencies because unless the trannie is post-op she dont have a pussy....i personally love pussy so i could never stay faithful to a trannie if i were to be in a relationship with one because i'd still feen for pussy...but u cant be mad at me because i have no control over it

[goku]

you're not comprehending...it's not like the dude is gay and likes dudes, but if he only likes trannies and not pussy too, he's obviously not str8 or have st8 tendencies because unless the trannie is post-op she dont have a pussy....i personally love pussy so i could never stay faithful to a trannie if i were to be in a relationship with one because i'd still feen for pussy...but u cant be mad at me because i have no control over it


Nigga, you have control. We all have control.



I could give a fuck what kind of girl I am with. As long as she is giving good head, and has a hole to fuck I am good(that's just sexually).

[FreddieGomez]

Nigga, you have control. We all have control.



I could give a fuck what kind of girl I am with. As long as she is giving good head, and has a hole to fuck I am good(that's just sexually).

well i need pussy in my life too...might as well find me a bi female who likes trannies too

[amberskyi]

you're not comprehending...it's not like the dude is gay and likes dudes, but if he only likes trannies and not pussy too, he's obviously not str8 or have st8 tendencies because unless the trannie is post-op she dont have a pussy....i personally love pussy so i could never stay faithful to a trannie if i were to be in a relationship with one because i'd still feen for pussy...but u cant be mad at me because i have no control over it

both of my ex boyfriends had genetic girlfriends before me and after me.they like pussy but they loved me.the keyword there is love.when you love someone that person becomes enough for you.the first boyfriend cheated on me but the second was the most faithful,honest,loving man i ever meet(and he was a pussy bandit lol).he was no where near gay because he was a man and loved me as his woman no matter what the hell is between my legs.
i truely hope you get a handle on your sexuality one day and man up.right now your acting like a dl gay dude.

[giovanni_hotel]

I LUV pussy. I LUV tgirls. But if a TG and I have that emotional connection and the sex is on point, I'm not laying in bed missing pussy.

[drock]

well i need pussy in my life too...might as well find me a bi female who likes trannies too


Yeah but how do you find those cause most chicks don't even like to get down with dudes that like trannys...

[sd123223]

thanks for all the posts regardining this some of you have put some thought into your replies i value that

giovanni i reckon that might be the way to go start introducing some kink into the bedoom and see what happens as well as stay away from trans and clubs etc where I will be tempted

freddie i like gals and trans i don't consider myself gay as i do not go for men pretty simple really.

cheers

[goku]

well i need pussy in my life too...might as well find me a bi female who likes trannies too


I hear where you comin from. You gotta do you, but being dishonest will always come back and bite you in the ass. At least be a man and stay single.



For me, if I wanna play, I will just stay single. There is no need drag some girl in the mud for personal game. If your game is nice enough, and you tell em you don't want anything serious, they will still be happy to oblige.

[GrimFusion]

Read Sex at Dawn, by Christopher Ryan, and then encourage your wife to read it too. It could change how you and/or your wife thinks about monogamy. He makes some good arguments about why man is not inherently a monogamous being.

Right. Ask anybody, even around here. Most of them will say something to the effect of "Don't cheat. Cheating is bad, m'kaaay?". Most major religions consider infidelity a sin. Talk shows scorn cheaters, congregations excommunicate them. It's public opinion that monogamy is the right thing to do, but a lot of people are liars.

It's a little insane that everybody rallies around marriage and being monogamous when about 50percent of men and 26 percent of women will have an affair at some point in some marriage. That's only marriages. That's not counting all of the fiances cheating on fiances or boyfriends cheating on girlfriends or vice versa; rambling into variations for sexual orientations, etc. In fact, these rounded figures are gathered from marriage counselors, so that's discounting any marriage which doesn't seek marriage counseling.

Blah. Whatever. I've had a few threesomes in my days. All were between my ex and her friend. Even experimenting, I'd notice the stupid stuff like her off giving me the squinty eyes while I'm kissing and scratching at her girlfriend. It got to the point where she was accusing me of sleeping with her friend outside of the threesomes. I've never cheated in my life. I bailed on the next opportunity, she ended up sleeping with her without me, that turned into a fight, and we decided to give up on bringing other people in. Best idea ever. Maybe there were a few pre-existing trust issues, but threesomes sure irritated the hell out of them. We stayed together for about a year after that and the sex really wasn't the issue because the alternative was the collapse of "us".

[nonnonnon]

It's a little insane that everybody rallies around marriage and being monogamous when about 60 percent of men and 40 percent of women will have an affair at some point in some marriage. That's only marriages. That's not counting all of the fiances cheating on fiances or boyfriends cheating on girlfriends or vice versa; rambling into variations for sexual orientations, etc. In fact, these rounded figures are gathered from marriage counselors, so that's discounting any marriage which doesn't seek marriage counseling.


I'm starting to understand Darrell's point of view (and that's scary)
Maybe I should stop looking for a wife and just have fun

[phobun]

Maybe I should stop looking for a wife and just have fun


If you're here, you aren't sincerely "looking for a wife"

[phobun]

well i need pussy in my life too...


Be self-reliant: you're all the pussy you'll ever need.

[TsVanessa69]

a man who likes trannies wont stay monogamous to either unless he's "gay"
Thats a lie. You don't even date trannys, so how can you even speak on it?

[nonnonnon]

If you're here, you aren't sincerely "looking for a wife"

¯\(º_o)/¯

[TsVanessa69]

Be self-reliant: you're all the pussy you'll ever need.
Its Sunday and i have to say Amen to that!

[TsVanessa69]

both of my ex boyfriends had genetic girlfriends before me and after me.they like pussy but they loved me.the keyword there is love.when you love someone that person becomes enough for you.the first boyfriend cheated on me but the second was the most faithful,honest,loving man i ever meet(and he was a pussy bandit lol).he was no where near gay because he was a man and loved me as his woman no matter what the hell is between my legs.
i truely hope you get a handle on your sexuality one day and man up.right now your acting like a dl gay dude.
I so agree with you as my situations in life are actually the same. I date men who date woman. I am sometimes the first, and sometimes the only trans. BUT the dated me for ME, not whats between my legs. And YES we we in monogomas relationships. Its HA, you can't expect these dudes to know whats up. Freddy is annoying and a lil faggot. Females don't like bitchasses. So we know he jacks off ALOT, or fucks or gets fucked by dudes.

[Floyd]

You physically and emotional abuse all of the men that you date.


I so agree with you as my situations in life are actually the same. I date men who date woman. I am sometimes the first, and sometimes the only trans. BUT the dated me for ME, not whats between my legs. And YES we we in monogomas relationships. Its HA, you can't expect these dudes to know whats up. Freddy is annoying and a lil faggot. Females don't like bitchasses. So we know he jacks off ALOT, or fucks or gets fucked by dudes.

[phobun]

You physically and emotional abuse all of the men that you date.


You aren't an alpha male, are you?

[FreddieGomez]

Vanessa is a damn stalker...everything i say she's two minutes behind LOOKIN TO INSTIGATE SHIT...grow the fuck up...you're 38, act like it....i don't even say shit to you... Chupacabra

[TsVanessa69]

Vanessa is a damn stalker...everything i say she's two minutes behind LOOKIN TO INSTIGATE SHIT...grow the fuck up...you're 38, act like it....i don't even say shit to you... Chupacabra
chupawebo!

[TsVanessa69]

You physically and emotional abuse all of the men that you date.
Nah we fuck alot, eat alot and have FUN!!!!!!
We get money together and laugh at clowns like you.

[goku]

Vanessa is a damn stalker...everything i say she's two minutes behind LOOKIN TO INSTIGATE SHIT...grow the fuck up...you're 38, act like it....i don't even say shit to you... Chupacabra



Actually, she is 14 minutes behind you looking to instigate shit.



Get it right Freddie!:joke: