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Cathy
03-08-2009, 05:25 PM
My story and my feelings are something I've wanted to put out there for a long time. I have been concerned about some of the comments I might receive but decided that I would follow my usual idea that honesty truly is the best policy.

I am a man in my mid 50's but am told that I look mid to late 40's. I began to crossdress when I was a child. I thought something was wrong with me, but it made me feel so good! I also knew and still do, that I have no attraction to men and so this became even more confusing to me.

I kept this secret until my second marriage and then shared my desires with my wife. She was receptive and finally I could crossdress from head to toe and what a great feeling that was. The hightlight of this was one night when I was in Manhattan and she dressed me up and we both went to the bar at the Waldorf Astoria for a couple of hours. I was elated!

Another exiting period is when I would dress up to the nines (very passable also) and have sex with her. The feeling was fantastic.

For quite some time, I believed that if I could live my life over, I would transform to a T-girl. Again, I had confused feelings as I still did not like the idea of being with a man and so this did not make much sense.

After about 3 years of doing this with my wife. Our sexual encounters with me dressed up would include me sucking or getting fucked by her with a dildo. I could not believe the enjoyment this brought to me. I then on a few occasions watched some tranny porn. The level of excitement and arousal was incredible.

I live in a relatively small region in upstate, NY and there are no real resources to be with T-Girls. On occasion, I travel for business and when going to NY or Chicago, I sought out TG/TV escorts. The good experiences were exquisit and the bad ones were still exciting.

What I have learned is that the crossdressing was a substitute for what was missing from my life.

Now I know that if I were younger and lived in a more metropolitan area, my search for a partner would be a T-Girl. For me that is the best of all worlds.

My advice to men with my kind of story is to go for what you want regardless of the opinions of others. My advice to T-Girls is that you should not act like men with tits, nor should you act like women today as they have ruined it for themselves. You should be a woman with a femine and more traditional nurturing approach. You will win over many modern men this way. There are others out there like me that want a good woman in their lives that they can build a solid relationship with.

What do I hope for now at this point in my life? Quite frankly, I would be ecstatic to be able to find T-Girls to socialize with when I have the opportunity to travel. While it is fine to get an escort for an hour or two, it is not the same as being able to sit, laugh and share together. Am I opposed to that leading to or being involved sexually....no, not at all. In fact that would be a wonderful bonus as there is not a moment of any day that passes that I don't have at least fleeting thought of being penetrated by an attractive woman or kneeling in front of her having the opportunity of pleasing her orally. This reality would be a welcome relief from my daily struggles with only having this as my fantasy.

Thanks for letting me finally air my thought and feelings. I have been fortunate to have been with several wonderful TG escorts over the past few years. My memories of those times will never fade.

Cathy........I appreciate having had this forum to vent and share and hope it is received in the spriit in which it was intended...Thanks!

Takingbackme
03-08-2009, 05:32 PM
I actualy read it all! Yeay me!

phobun
03-08-2009, 05:33 PM
My story and my feelings are something I've wanted to put out there for a long time. I have been concerned about some of the comments I might receive but decided that I would follow my usual idea that honesty truly is the best policy.

I am a man in my mid 50's but am told that I look mid to late 40's. I began to crossdress when I was a child. I thought something was wrong with me, but it made me feel so good! I also knew and still do, that I have no attraction to men and so this became even more confusing to me.

I kept this secret until my second marriage and then shared my desires with my wife. She was receptive and finally I could crossdress from head to toe and what a great feeling that was. The hightlight of this was one night when I was in Manhattan and she dressed me up and we both went to the bar at the Waldorf Astoria for a couple of hours. I was elated!

Another exiting period is when I would dress up to the nines (very passable also) and have sex with her. The feeling was fantastic.

For quite some time, I believed that if I could live my life over, I would transform to a T-girl. Again, I had confused feelings as I still did not like the idea of being with a man and so this did not make much sense.

After about 3 years of doing this with my wife. Our sexual encounters with me dressed up would include me sucking or getting fucked by her with a dildo. I could not believe the enjoyment this brought to me. I then on a few occasions watched some tranny porn. The level of excitement and arousal was incredible.

I live in a relatively small region in upstate, NY and there are no real resources to be with T-Girls. On occasion, I travel for business and when going to NY or Chicago, I sought out TG/TV escorts. The good experiences were exquisit and the bad ones were still exciting.

What I have learned is that the crossdressing was a substitute for what was missing from my life.

Now I know that if I were younger and lived in a more metropolitan area, my search for a partner would be a T-Girl. For me that is the best of all worlds.

My advice to men with my kind of story is to go for what you want regardless of the opinions of others. My advice to T-Girls is that you should not act like men with tits, nor should you act like women today as they have ruined it for themselves. You should be a woman with a femine and more traditional nurturing approach. You will win over many modern men this way. There are others out there like me that want a good woman in their lives that they can build a solid relationship with.

What do I hope for now at this point in my life? Quite frankly, I would be ecstatic to be able to find T-Girls to socialize with when I have the opportunity to travel. While it is fine to get an escort for an hour or two, it is not the same as being able to sit, laugh and share together. Am I opposed to that leading to or being involved sexually....no, not at all. In fact that would be a wonderful bonus as there is not a moment of any day that passes that I don't have at least fleeting thought of being penetrated by an attractive woman or kneeling in front of her having the opportunity of pleasing her orally. This reality would be a welcome relief from my daily struggles with only having this as my fantasy.

Thanks for letting me finally air my thought and feelings. I have been fortunate to have been with several wonderful TG escorts over the past few years. My memories of those times will never fade.

Cathy........I appreciate having had this forum to vent and share and hope it is received in the spriit in which it was intended...Thanks!
This is all about you. What about your wife's interests, needs and pleasure? She has been so giving and accomodating to you, now you want to selfishly indulge your own fantasies with others? Have you considered that this might hurt your wife?

Cathy
03-08-2009, 06:39 PM
To Takingbackme and phobun....

I read your posts. It was an OMG moment for me. You are both right! I can see that I have been in a slump for quite some time now and in fact, my thoughts and behavior are not representative of my real self.

You folks without hesitation slapped me back to reality and I am grateful!

Thank you for your candor, insight and being kind in how you handled the situation. I am relieved and will reform this.

Best to you both!

Cathy

justatransgirl
03-08-2009, 09:55 PM
Hi Cathy,
Thanks for posting your story.

I think the other posters made good points, that you should be sure to always be aware and supportive of your SO, who seems supportive of you.

Regarding your desires to meet t-girls. Escorting is not always just about sex. What you are looking for sounds like someone who is part dominatrix, part courtesan, part companion/friend.

What they call the GFE - girlfriend experience. Someone you can enjoy just being with, but that also has an outlet for your sexual desires.

The thing is that girls who are pleasant to be around, who are educated and can carry on a conversation beyond the level of "gimme money papi," and who truly enjoy entertaining men and creating fantasies are few and far between.

When you want a girlfriend fantasy you have to date a girl who is able and willing to provide such a fantasy. It's unlikely you will find that in anyone but a professional courtesan. And the first job of a professional courtesan is to make you forget that you are with a professional. That you are with a friend who enjoys your company as much as you enjoy hers.

It's unrealistic to expect to meet someone like that out of the blue. Sure it does happen, but it could take a lifetime.

You have to remember that a quality courtesan knows that at the end of the day you are going to leave and go home to your wife and life. And that's OK. That's her job. But with such a girl you will not remember that it's her job.

There are only a handful of such girls in the country. Some participate in this forum. And none come cheap. But when you are with such a girl you aren't buying sex, you are helping a friend who enjoys taking her time with you and who truly wants you to enjoy being with her.

Happy hunting,
TS Jamie :-)