A Question about "Topping" in relationships.

[macfan]

Something that has always intrigued me is within a personal relationship with a guy, if you have one with a guy, would you be opened to topping that guy or is that something which is a no no for you.

I ask this question because as an exclusive "Top" male and reading this forum it seems many of the guys on here are more into bottoming and sucking, just as long as its a "TG lady"

Within all of this one must separate the business aspect of things such as porn and escorting to the real life scenarios of what you girls may or may not actually desire. It is this that I am interested in getting an idea of. If you are in a relationship with a guy and he asks you to top him via fucking or sucking would that influence you and how so. TG ladies responses only please, I know where the dudes stand for the most part.

[KiraHarden]

Something that has always intrigued me is within a personal relationship with a guy, if you have one with a guy, would you be opened to topping that guy or is that something which is a no no for you.

I ask this question because as an exclusive "Top" male and reading this forum it seems many of the guys on here are more into bottoming and sucking, just as long as its a "TG lady"

Within all of this one must separate the business aspect of things such as porn and escorting to the real life scenarios of what you girls may or may not actually desire. It is this that I am interested in getting an idea of. If you are in a relationship with a guy and he asks you to top him via fucking or sucking would that influence you and how so. TG ladies responses only please, I know where the dudes stand for the most part.
No! I never would top my BF :puke I would consider a BF giving me oral, if he was into me as a person and not a cock bandit.

[56k]

Something that has always intrigued me is within a personal relationship with a guy, if you have one with a guy, would you be opened to topping that guy or is that something which is a no no for you.


I ask this question because as an exclusive "Top" male and reading this forum it seems many of the guys on here are more into bottoming and sucking, just as long as its a "TG lady"

Hey, I'm a Top guy myself. Although I have very little experience with a
"TG Lady" I told my first (Actually only) experience with a TS that if she thought she was going to bottom me or whatever you wanna call it, she had another thing coming.



Within all of this one must separate the business aspect of things such as porn and escorting to the real life scenarios of what you girls may or may not actually desire.


I really don't think many know what pleases them. When you're used to be the dominator and you meet someone else that is accustomed to pleasing, you'll find yourself situation where both are trying to please the other.

Actually, I never knew the majority guys want to be screwed by a TS.



It is this that I am interested in getting an idea of.

I am as well. C'mon ladies there are guys out there that don't want to be on the receiving end of things. We would like to know what it is. :D




If you are in a relationship with a guy and he asks you to top him via fucking or sucking would that influence you and how so. TG ladies responses only please, I know where the dudes stand for the most part.

..............

[mbf]

Actually, I never knew the majority guys want to be screwed by a TS.


It´s a whole different thing when it comes to an actual relationship. This board - as said a thousand times now - is porn - centric and to a high degree about TS-escorting. In that respect, in a "client-provider" relation, I am sure the majority of guys want to be bottoms.

Furthermore, I suspect you won´t get many answers at all, I just don´t think many TS who *would* or have dicked down their BF will admit that on this board - for several reasons.

As from my personal experience, even as the guy in charge, be occasionally prepared for some surprising moves on the part of the TS when she get´s her freak on.

[ARMANIXXX]

tag for later

[S6XN9NE]

I am a 100% top guy myself. I am only attracted to the TS's because so many of them are so damn sexy and feminine, more so than many GG's I know and date. As far as their equipment goes, get that damn thing out of my sight....LOL........

[KiraHarden]

I am a 100% top guy myself. I am only attracted to the TS's because so many of them are so damn sexy and feminine, more so than many GG's I know and date. As far as their equipment goes, get that damn thing out of my sight....LOL........
Yeah baby :claps

[peggygee]

Hells 2 the no. :smh

I realize that I don't have a dick,
so it's almost a moot point.

But there will be no strap ons, dildoes
up his ass, fingers, cucumbers, or any
other objects placed up your ass by me.

If that's what you seek, then you're the
wrong man for me, and I'm the wrong
woman for you.

There's other things that I'm not crazy
about sexually, but I might bend to that
to keep the relationship fresh.

But me fucking you, ain't one.

[tgirlzoe]

Never have topped a bio-boy, never will. My ex-fiance and I tried damn near everything and even though he was top in the relationship and generally in bed, we tried things. I've shoved many a toy up his ass and cunt, just as he has me. But those days are over.

Yeah, I had my first straight BB boyfriend tell me that he was still interested in me, even though I have a dick but there was no way it was going up his bum. At least we agreed on that.

I think the issue is demasculinization of the man and masculinization if the woman. I like men, fit, masculine, honorable, dominant (but respectful) men. I don't want to have my man get on all fours and be like, "oooh, fuck me baby!" No, I want my man to throw me on the bed, pin me down and fuck me raw.

Same goes for oral, I am not going to stand up with my man on his knees and be like, "suck it, bitch" and skullfuck him, ick! But I'll lay down on the bed, legs spread and he can lick my cock like he licks a clit. It's not that I hate my penis, it's the power dynamic involved.

(Didn't we have this thread recently?)

[KiraHarden]

I think the issue is demasculinization of the man and masculinization if the woman. I like men, fit, masculine, honorable, dominant (but respectful) men.

Very well put and I agree.



I don't want to have my man get on all fours and be like, "oooh, fuck me baby!"
Never :puke


Same goes for oral, I am not going to stand up with my man on his knees and be like, "suck it, bitch" and skullfuck him, ick
Never :thumbsdown


But I'll lay down on the bed, legs spread and he can lick my cock like he licks a clit. It's not that I hate my penis, it's the power dynamic involved.
Thats possible if hes not just into me for the dick, it has to be with someone I'm in a relationship with :)


(Didn't we have this thread recently?)
Yes, quite a few acually :lol:

[tsmandy]

I ended up casually dating (I guess it wasn't so casual for him though) a guy who started out as my client. Once he stopped paying my hourly I stopped having any interest in fucking his ass, its one thing to satisfy a customer, quite another to do something for fun (or not fun). I just tend to shut down a little bit when I'm topping a guy, which is ok for work, but not all that great for a healthy relationship.

I do like putting a glove on my hand and giving a prostate massage though, I think it is awesome to feel a guys prostate throbbing right before he cums, and I would happily do that with a guy that I date. Why? Because some things aren't so much about gender as they are feeling good. And it feels really good to have something up your ass when you cum. In my mind, a prostate massage, is just part of a kickass handjob.

Even escorting I would steer my clients the prostate massage route whenever possible, as a way of exploring first time anal sex.

[Nowhere]

I know you're saying for only the women to chime in, but I really think most guys are NOT as bottom as the industry perceives.

I think the bottom guys are the LOUDEST guys and the ones who frequent the escorts the most, but actually the ones who make the smallest percentage of the audience out there.

It's just like I posted in another thread about the tgirl weddings site. There's been virtually no one 'raving' about them, but the moment I mention how it was completely ruined by the girls being all tops there, everyone and their mother agreed with me.

So, with all of these 'top' threads and interest in the like, I'm getting the impression it's the same handful of loud guys going crazy over it, who really aren't the majority of guys out there (not that anything's wrong with it, of course)

And, you really can't simply ask the working girls about it, because I do think that same small group of guys constitutes the majority of their clientèle.

But, does their clientèle constitute most of the guys into this?

Of course not.

Most guys who are into this wouldn't let it out of their own computer, let alone be with one of them in real life.

I would bet a million dollars what porn you'd find on Eddie Murphy's PC if someone cracked that thing open, even though rumor has it that he hasn't been with any girls since his 'incident' years ago.

That's the reality I see.

[peggygee]

I think the bottom guys are the LOUDEST guys and the ones who frequent the escorts the most, but actually the ones who make the smallest percentage of the audience out there.



I'm wondering if the bottom guys are the ones who frequent escorts
the most because they most likely can't get a girl to top them for free.

Cause I get the sense that the tops who will knock a girls back out,
or treat her like the woman she is, may be able to get more freebie
action.

Just a hypothesis. :shrug

[mbf]

I think the bottom guys are the LOUDEST guys and the ones who frequent the escorts the most, but actually the ones who make the smallest percentage of the audience out there.



I'm wondering if the bottom guys are the ones who frequent escorts
the most because they most likely can't get a girl to top them for free.

Cause I get the sense that the tops who will knock a girls back out,
or treat her like the woman she is, may be able to get more freebie
action.

Just a hypothesis. :shrug

thats not a hypothesis, thats the damn truth

thats why the bottom dudes have to pay .....

[Alchemist]

Like Nowhere said, I think it's because bottom's are much more vocal even though they are a minority.

That said, I share many of the same sentiments as you macfac. I would never let a woman top me, and porn where the guy is getting fucked by the girl makes me flaccid quicker than Rosie O'Donnell in a Victoria's Secret lingere. I have to say, it's comforting to see that there are more top guys on this forum than I originally percieved. I find myself drawn to a lot of t-girl's because as you said, they exude femininity a lot better than some of the GG I have dated too.

God bless'em. :lol:

[62des]

^ I think we can all agree with that.

[Caleigh]

I feel the same way pretty much as Peggy and
Kira. When I have sex with guys, I really have
no interest in topping them. Any guy that wants
me to top him has just turned me off totally.
Only him crossdressing could turn me off more
quickly.

[speck]

There are definitely more top guys than bottom guys(and I suppose all shades of gray in between.) This is partly because a lot of straight guys get into ts because some ts are insanely attractive. So the straight guy takes a shot. But this guy isn't likely to spend a lot of time obsessing on ts and posting on message boards all day. So you don't hear from them on the internet boards. The bottom guys however....you have to go through steps and phases as a straight guy to get to that point. So a lot of them are REALLY obsessed with ts. And they spend a lot of time on message boards. Furthermore, these guys really have no outlet to talk about this stuff...so the message board becomes a surrogate friend of sorts. A straight guy can eff a ts in the ass and then lie and brag to his friends about this hot chick he did anal on.

That said, every ts is different and has different sexual preferences. If you are their type, there are many attractive ts escorts that will basically try to rape you the minute you walk in the door. And there are others like the girls here....they want to be seen and treated as any other women.

I do have one final thing.....when I go down on a ts, I love to see HER getting pleasure from it. That is why I do it. I rarely do it with gg escorts because I know the reaction is almost certainly faked. But with a ts...if she gets aroused, if she gets turned on and cums....that turns me on a lot. That can't be totally faked and there is some physical pleasure on her part.....and many really enjoy it. Even if I'm the one that paid....I have more fun if the escort enjoys herself too. I can't say I'm a fan of a girl ramming it down my throat.....but I have no problem with a girl laying on her back or 69.

[ARMANIXXX]

Someone refresh my memory,


But I thought OP asked for ts girl opinions and insight.

[skybuddha]

I freely admit to being drawn to this forum because of the insane beauty and femininty I have witnessed in the women at this forum and I wouldnt judge them for topping in the same way I wouldnt judge those who are pre op and have a penis. I would laugh at the idea. To me its a nonsense.
This is an interesting thread. I have done neither top nor bottom and cant' even prove to myself what I would like since never having met or even kissed a T Girl yet and wasnt' aware of the concepts of top and bottom until relatively recently but now I see potentially people are dividing themselves into groups with different allegiances towards top or bottom. I suppose that is human nature.
With a lack of experience and an open mind I suggest that its quite possible a man who tops could be a cowardly weak unprotective piece of shit and a man who is bottomed could be extremely masculine.

I guess these sorts of definitions of top and bottom come from people trying to preserve their sanity in some way. I would presuppose an attack on someones inner identity is an attack on sanity itself and requires a certain mentality just to get through.
I dont think being topped should be a chink in anyones armour and that anyone should care what anyone else thinks of them for doing it or being bottomed. Once you say to yourself : 'Ok I was bottomed or I sucked a cock' hence I am not a man leaves the door open to call all T girls at this place dudes as in : 'Hey I kissed a dude ! Ewwwwwwww'
Or 'OMG I topped a guy. I'm not a Girl/TGirl now and this means Im gay!' I think none of these attitudes are helpful really. Why make life more complicated for yourself than it already is. A man could just as easily have a problem with anal. 'Omg I had anal therefore scientifically I must be gay' and then the crap u read in the enquirer comes out of your subsconcious such as: 'I read somewhere a woman said all men who want anal sex are closet gays'

My 2 cents is you are what you are and for a given minority of people within a judged group to judge others is probably a lesson not learned. We should know not to rush to judgement based upon appearances, or a few superficial facts shouldnt' we ? I dont see any scientific relationship between being topped/bottomed and how someone is as a person or that persons moral standards.

Of course theres always personal preference to account for this which is of course not hypocrisy. But nothing in your behaviour can change who you are. In many mainstream peoples minds the very act of kissing a girl who has a penis amounts to kissing a man. Judgement is all relative. masculinity and femininity is already under threat from haters. I think to be powerful, confident, self assured and know your own reality is enough. For a group of TGirls struggling lifelong against closed minded people having a problem with their feminity to thus also have a problem with the masculinity of a hetrosexual man who is bottomed is also an interesting situation to ponder. I think a lot of men find out about this scene because of open mindedness and curiosity. That probably includes myself. To discover a closed minded sub group within the group is even more interesting still.
Finally my opinion is there should be few judgements in a relationship of ever increasing intimacy and closeness. You've got to love each other as you are. Whether pre op or post op you have to make it work. And after considering a few things I dont think those who top are any better or worse than those who bottom. To say one is more powerful or 'authentic' than another is a misconception. Each partner within a relationship of equals gets what they want as responsible deciding adults therefore power is shared.
As for myself, I not obsessed with anything in particular but I think sex is about experimentation and you have to try things to discover what you like and dont like. In an environment of mutual respect I think guilt and shame are undesirable.

[laoda8]

It seems that the idea of "topping" and "bottoming" are used to fill in traditional gender roles in a relationship. Most of those gender roles haven't done right by people like transsexuals and gays throuhgout history.

I mean, if I'm with a TS and she gets aroused, do I just let her finish herself off without being as phsyically satisfied as I would be and grant her the mental satisfaction that all the puzzle pieces fit? I'm not knocking women or men for having their own sexual preference, despite some of the contradictory arguments on the board, that's pretty much why people are here.

I'm just wondering would you judge someone were they to not attach a sexual act to a specific gender role, or do you just not want that?

[tgirlzoe]

"Top" and "bottom" come from the gay world and among gay men, there are not many butch-fem couples (unlike lesbians, where it's common). Skinny little fem twinks tend to date skinny little fem twinks and big burly masculine bears date other big burly masculine bears. I lived on Capitol Hill in Seattle and worked between two gay bars - one was Neighbors, a trendy dance club and the other was The Cuff, a leather bar. It showed clearly the segregation in the gay community.

So what I'm saying is that there are many fem tops and butch bottoms, they're sexual preferences, not gender markers. Yet... they are. Among straight people, men are expected to be top and women bottom always and anything else is considered "kinky". When TS women date men, they have those same assumptions, which are not bad as long as you realize they're mutable, whatever you're into is all good. I'm just saying what I'm into.

[skybuddha]

I get what youre saying but I think the attitude quoted below applied among heterosexual couples is very 1950's and still has its roots in some form of hang up. In those times heterosexual people kept their thoughts about sex secret, were programmed by that which they didnt have to keep secret which made them narrow minded and judgemental and it was very unhealthy for them and for society in general.


Among straight people, men are expected to be top and women bottom always and anything else is considered "kinky".

It is like saying that men and women should only have sex in the missionary position with the man initiating everything. That just doesnt happen any more and hasnt' for decades. Thankfully people have become more enlightened than that.


There are many dominant women and less dominant men around. God knows I lost a lot of drinking buddies quite recently once they got married and were afraid of their own shadows ,lol. Conventional heterosexuality is a diverse region even using my prefix of 'conventional'. If standing outside of it, its too easy to make stereotypical simplifications about it.



ps, just for the record Im not arguing for anything in particular, top , bottom or whatever or against anyone. I'm just blowing my minds' nose onto the convenient tissue of the forum pages ;)

[56k]

I mean, if I'm with a TS and she gets aroused, do I just let her finish herself off without being as phsyically satisfied as I would be and grant her the mental satisfaction that all the puzzle pieces fit?


I think there should be a mutual agreement where both parties stand. If we are discussing a one time offer then, you can do whatever you please with no strings attached. However, if we are talking on a consecutive basis, one needs to be the dominant role model in the relationship.

I can't answer for any other guy but, I get satisfaction pleasing my lady. That's what turns me on. 8) There are too many other things to do in order to make her explode in ecstasy without being fucked in the ass.

Call it Neanderthal if you wish, I believe in Me (Man) Tarzan and You (Woman) Jane. Picking my lady up throwing her on the bed and fucking her in all type of positions is what I do. If she's looking for a man to stuff her dick up his ass, she needs to find another guy.

[macfan]

I know you're saying for only the women to chime in, but I really think most guys are NOT as bottom as the industry perceives.

I think the bottom guys are the LOUDEST guys and the ones who frequent the escorts the most, but actually the ones who make the smallest percentage of the audience out there.

It's just like I posted in another thread about the tgirl weddings site. There's been virtually no one 'raving' about them, but the moment I mention how it was completely ruined by the girls being all tops there, everyone and their mother agreed with me.

So, with all of these 'top' threads and interest in the like, I'm getting the impression it's the same handful of loud guys going crazy over it, who really aren't the majority of guys out there (not that anything's wrong with it, of course)

And, you really can't simply ask the working girls about it, because I do think that same small group of guys constitutes the majority of their clientèle.

But, does their clientèle constitute most of the guys into this?

Of course not.

Most guys who are into this wouldn't let it out of their own computer, let alone be with one of them in real life.

I would bet a million dollars what porn you'd find on Eddie Murphy's PC if someone cracked that thing open, even though rumor has it that he hasn't been with any girls since his 'incident' years ago.

That's the reality I see.

Very interesting indeed about the "top" guys may just be more quiet and go about their business without it being out there, never really thought of it in that setup. You raise some good points for sure about perception and reality.

I checked out that wedding site as well and couldn't take it any longer. Talk about having a concept so appealing so ass backwards for a guy like myself that I was sorely disappointed.

[KiraHarden]

Someone refresh my memory,


But I thought OP asked for ts girl opinions and insight.
Yes sir, you are correct.

[tgirlzoe]

Among straight people, men are expected to be top and women bottom always and anything else is considered "kinky".

It is like saying that men and women should only have sex in the missionary position with the man initiating everything. That just doesnt happen any more and hasnt' for decades. Thankfully people have become more enlightened than that.

Who said "missionary position"? I'm talking about a wife strapping on a cock and fucking her husband in the ass. There are few men and women who are into that. It's no different if the cock is permanently attached. Sorry if that seems out-dated and sexually repressed to you, that's life.

[mbf]

Like i say mate, in the real world, if youve got the goods, just go out and fuk all the tgirls you want...you saw my pics, who i am...its piss easy to go out and fuk them like any other girl...infact its easier because the bitches are suckers for buff bodybuilders. They are originally guys, so their taste in men is ussually simmilar to v feminine gay guys...who all want big sexy ripped men to fuk them. Forget the whole 'top only' bollox haha, what tgirls are top only in real life pmsl? Ts love to be banged shitless by a big ripped sexy guy with a big cock...end of story. Thats the real world (unless they are 'lesbian ts' in which case 90% of the time they are men in disguise and not ts at all)...the rest is the crap made in porn movies and on this board to fuel the fantasies of the deluded cock hungry admirers who are really gay and also want to be fukd by the alpha male but are too scared to admit it. Welcome to the real world and not a transexual internet fetish world.


That pretty much nails it.

[Ecstatic]

Why? Because some things aren't so much about gender as they are feeling good.

Because OP directed this topic to the women, I was going to refrain from throwing my two cents into the ring, but Mandy, this is a very important point you made and one I wholly agree with. I'm versatile, and love both top and bottom for different reasons. Regarding your prostrate massage point, that's precisely why I enjoy being bottom: it simply feels good. But what's most important to me is the dynamic of the two (or more) lovers in bed and in relationship. I don't need to be either top or bottom, so whatever is satisfying to me and my partner is fine.

A couple of TG friends of mine put it this way: when they first came to this country, they were shocked and even repulsed by guys wanting to be bottom. They had never been top, and had no interest in it. But working as escorts, they decided it was good to service the client. In the process, they both discovered that they quite enjoy being top, physically. They are still women and prefer the woman's role (as it were), but also derive pleasure from reversing the roles.



Among straight people, men are expected to be top and women bottom always and anything else is considered "kinky".

It is like saying that men and women should only have sex in the missionary position with the man initiating everything. That just doesnt happen any more and hasnt' for decades. Thankfully people have become more enlightened than that.

Going out on a limb a bit here, but regarding transwomen and conventional gender roles, I daresay that in some ways transwomen are more conventional than natal women. What I mean is, transwomen who fully identify as women and who go through all sorts of struggles in their lives to achieve their goal (however self-defined) to be women, hold more tightly to conventional female roles in some ways than natal women do, and perhaps this is one of them.

I don't know: Peg, what do you think?

[skybuddha]

Who said "missionary position"? I'm talking about a wife strapping on a cock and fucking her husband in the ass. There are few men and women who are into that. It's no different if the cock is permanently attached. Sorry if that seems out-dated and sexually repressed to you, that's life.


Ok I understand what you're talking about now. It was my own naievty and lack of experience in this area which led me not to see what you meant.
My previous understanding was that this statement of yours below
is wrong and does not reflect the situation among the heterosexual community because I did not realise you were talking about strap ons.


Among straight people, men are expected to be top and women bottom always and anything else is considered "kinky".

While thats not what I'm into, and despite the fact its not my thing, I am tolerant of others even when there is nothing in it for me and still think guilt or shame about this or anything else between 2 partners who respect each other has no place within a intimate relationship.

[tsmandy]

It's really funny to read guy after guy talking about what most escorts experience.

Well guys, in my experience. You are all wrong. Most of my clients have not been bottoms. Maybe thats because I don't generally shoot a hot steaming load of jizz in their face, so I get the crowd that doesn't care about such things.

Really I would say the vast majority of my clients have been "first-timers" (though sometimes I think that lie is a big part of the fantasy), generally guys (though a few women) who have no idea what to do with a TS because they've only ever had sex with women, and they come to me looking to learn something new. And something new is what I am very good at.

Ecstatic, I'm glad we are on the same page. I don't think the TS community can be so easily lumped into the conservative gender role category however, perhaps the world that is represented here is, but my world has proved quite the opposite. There are still some of us for whom trans is more than just gender, its also transgression, and we mix it up, all the fucking time.

xoxo
mandy

[Ecstatic]

Ecstatic, I'm glad we are on the same page. I don't think the TS community can be so easily lumped into the conservative gender role category however, perhaps the world that is represented here is, but my world has proved quite the opposite. There are still some of us for whom trans is more than just gender, its also transgression, and we mix it up, all the fucking time.

xoxo
mandy

Cool. I didn't mean to imply the ts community as a whole, or even necessarily the majority of the community. In my experience, the community is quite diverse, so I really only raised that issue about conventionality for that portion of the ts community for which it may apply. I do think it does apply, at least for some.

Love this: "There are still some of us for whom trans is more than just gender, its also transgression, and we mix it up, all the fucking time." Transgression, yeah!

[a994]

(Didn't we have this thread recently?)


Yeah, it's every other thread, actually.

[tsmandy]

(Didn't we have this thread recently?)


Yeah, it's every other thread, actually.

Maybe there should just be a specific forum along with General Discussion, Personals, Politics and sports for Sexuality

[a994]

"Top" and "bottom" come from the gay world and among gay men, there are not many butch-fem couples (unlike lesbians, where it's common). Skinny little fem twinks tend to date skinny little fem twinks and big burly masculine bears date other big burly masculine bears. I lived on Capitol Hill in Seattle and worked between two gay bars - one was Neighbors, a trendy dance club and the other was The Cuff, a leather bar. It showed clearly the segregation in the gay community.

So what I'm saying is that there are many fem tops and butch bottoms, they're sexual preferences, not gender markers. Yet... they are. Among straight people, men are expected to be top and women bottom always and anything else is considered "kinky". When TS women date men, they have those same assumptions, which are not bad as long as you realize they're mutable, whatever you're into is all good. I'm just saying what I'm into.


No problem, tgirlzoe. We all have our preferences and I'm not going to presume to tell anyone what they should or should not like.

I for one would not mind being dominated at least occasionally by a hot woman whom I love (genetic or otherwise). At least as long as I get a shot back at her. :wink:

[62des]

Well this thread just opened up my eyes more. Based on all the tranny porn, it would seem that trannies would prefer to do the fucking when in reality, its the opposite with a few exceptions. This makes me happy. :D lol I always looked at it as the one with the tits and beautiful ass should get fucked and not the man. But to each his own to the bottoms. I get a feel of power when I have sex and for me I wouldn't get the same feeling if bottomed I could imagine.

[a994]

A couple of TG friends of mine put it this way: when they first came to this country, they were shocked and even repulsed by guys wanting to be bottom. They had never been top, and had no interest in it. But working as escorts, they decided it was good to service the client. In the process, they both discovered that they quite enjoy being top, physically. They are still women and prefer the woman's role (as it were), but also derive pleasure from reversing the roles.


That's the kind of woman I want (genetic or otherwise) to be with: one who is open-minded about sexual enjoyment and willing to experiment, even if I decide I do not want to be topped after all.


Going out on a limb a bit here, but regarding transwomen and conventional gender roles, I daresay that in some ways transwomen are more conventional than natal women. What I mean is, transwomen who fully identify as women and who go through all sorts of struggles in their lives to achieve their goal (however self-defined) to be women, hold more tightly to conventional female roles in some ways than natal women do, and perhaps this is one of them.


Possibly because they feel that they must do so in order to truly feel feminine, or because they feel a lingering amount of insecurity within themselves because of their physical gender at birth. Possibly because they feel they must do so in order to "pass."

And again, some ladies do and some don't, just the same as some genetic ladies do not like receiving oral sex, ever playing a dominant role with their men, etc.

[pittsburghadmirer]

I have been with 3 TGs, and I have dated all three. I guess I was in a serious relationship (albeit kinda short) with two of them. In all three cases, each of us were versatile when it came to sex. One liked to top more, one TG liked to bottom more, and the other really seemed into both.

[tg4me]

Two things.
Top/bottom is still widely used in the Fetish Community. I have 25+ years of knowledge there.

In the last four years or so, Doms with strap-ons have become the rage. A % of those guys are going to go one step further. It's not about the TG really, it's about a hot girl with a real strap-on. That's not meant to insult anyone, but to suggest that many switches/bottoms are looking for tg doms as the fantasy. It's the same as saying guys like to watch lesbo sex. Wrong! Guys like to watch hot girls having sex.
Whats become apparent to me is that most TG's want to be girls. They prefer the role as a sub/bottom. So far only one has even suggested that their fantasies are centered around seducing then fucking some guy as the ultimate power play.
My first attraction to Tg's was Foxy Angel. My first TG was with Kate from florida. They both like to drill guys silly and are not only tops..they are stong Dom tops. That's why I assumed most TG's were tops. That's what I thought "hung Angels" meant. That's what's in their heads. I'm a woman to all those that see me on the street. I'll seduce you with my fem charm and beauty. Behind closed doors I'm a woman that changes into a fucking Dominatrix ready to rock your world.
Further proof that TG's want to be girls not Doms? Almost all of you picked dance music as your fave videos. That says it all!!

[KiraHarden]

Further proof that TG's want to be girls not Doms? Almost all of you picked dance music as your fave videos. That says it all!!

I havent watched videos in yrs. Im not dom and I really dont care for dance music. Rock is my first choice

[tsmandy]

Two things.
Top/bottom is still widely used in the Fetish Community. I have 25+ years of knowledge there.

In the last four years or so, Doms with strap-ons have become the rage. A % of those guys are going to go one step further. It's not about the TG really, it's about a hot girl with a real strap-on. That's not meant to insult anyone, but to suggest that many switches/bottoms are looking for tg doms as the fantasy. It's the same as saying guys like to watch lesbo sex. Wrong! Guys like to watch hot girls having sex.

It took me a long time to get used to the top and bottom language because it means something different in the Fetish world, and I wasn't really familiar with that terminology coming from Gay male community.

For a long time I was Top only in terms of domme/sub but liked to get fucked on occasion. So when someone would ask me if I was top or bottom, I was always a little confused. Top to me, means I tie you up and do whatever I feel like, top to anonymous client means a good ass pounding. It's a bit of an adjustment.

Anyways, static identity kind of bores me, so I like to switch it up all the time.

Flagging red left pocket....

xxoo
mandy

[hwbs]

i think someone posts this topic every month just to stir things up around here....

[B_Neg]

i thought the whole idea we're going after is to get rid of labels. if you like something or someone, great, do it! or then! just don't harm others in the process. its up to each individual to decide what is pleasureful to them, and between the two in the relationship. would be great if we were all open to making eachother feel good in every way, and loving ALL of eachother's bodies in every way possible. thats the idea anyways. strange that that's so hard.

[skybuddha]

I agree with this:

i thought the whole idea we're going after is to get rid of labels. if you like something or someone, great, do it! or then! just don't harm others in the process. its up to each individual to decide what is pleasureful to them, and between the two in the relationship. would be great if we were all open to making eachother feel good in every way, and loving ALL of eachother's bodies in every way possible. thats the idea anyways. strange that that's so hard.



I agree with a lot that was said. As a straight guy I have a choice. I dont have to be here. I can stop corrupting myself and forget about this and get back onto the straight and narrow. I know myself. It's just a bad habit like smoking (for me anyway).
My opinion is its not cool to add more destructive labels onto people. It just makes it less fun to be the exciting anarchist rebelling against petty narrow mindedness which expresses itself by my being here.
Static behaviour bores me too the same way someone who constantly agrees with everything you say can get irrititating.

[macfan]

Guys you do realize that you have completely hijacked this topic from my original subject matter. This is not about addressing labels or societal conformity. There is a reason why I posted this line at the end of the original post "TG ladies responses only please, I know where the dudes stand for the most part"

I am aware that many of the guys on HA have varied tastes, but I had no interest in hearing that because it would become a discourse on society, narrow mindedness and tolerance. None of which I care to address here, after all I'm on this forum in the first place, so I know where I stand on that. I was simply seeking the views of the TG women on here as to their position on the thread title within a "real world relationship" environment. Not escort, not fantasy, not porn or the way it should be etc.

Certainly if a guy was in or has an LTR with a TG lady he would have validity in the topic, being that that was a comitted experience. I only saw one such individual make a post and mention it in his response. This was a topic more about relationships and the dynamics within that as opposed to any fleeting experience that certainly wasn't a valid relationship.

[KiraHarden]

Hells 2 the no. :smh

I realize that I don't have a dick,
so it's almost a moot point.

But there will be no strap ons, dildoes
up his ass, fingers, cucumbers, or any
other objects placed up your ass by me.

If that's what you seek, then you're the
wrong man for me, and I'm the wrong
woman for you.

There's other things that I'm not crazy
about sexually, but I might bend to that
to keep the relationship fresh.

But me fucking you, ain't one.
Not to cause offense but that is the reason why guys that choose T-Girls choose them, because if ass play is involved the general GG will respond just like this...but being a T we know what it feels like and all of that and it seems ay more natural for anal and oral to come into place and if you can honestly say that the "bonus" parts is not what excites you, stirs up emotions, or seems just plane exotic in comparison to regular GG then all I have to say is your are full of shit.

:lol: shes post op...

[TessTickles]

There's no way that a dick is going up MY ass. I, however, have no problem with the idea of going down on a t-girl.
I suppose that it may seem a contradiction to the view of many here, but it makes sense to me.
Logic, TessTickles style.

[freak]

The one thing I have noticed from this board is that the Bottom TS is the loudest as is the top man. The TS bottoms try to embarrass other TS's for admitting they enjoy being a dominant person during sex as the top man does the same for the man that wants to be dominated.

They both seem almost ashamed of what they are and what they do. (How can a TS like to fuck her man or How can a man let a TS fuck him)

Just something I noticed, has anyone else

[funkbrother]

i dont get all this "dont want to top a guy" stuff. If your in a relationship, do whatever gives you pleasure. as for being a cock bandit, its part of a ts and part of the allure that attracts lots of men to them. by the way.

I would like to know what the ts porn stars think of this, as they do it all the time in their movies. If they don't like topping then they are completely lying to everyone just to make a buck , and that completely goes against your cause of being feminine. So if you t girls would like more guys that don't like that, then start as a role model and stop doing that on film

[melissacarter]

When I'm wioth a tgirl, I am ALWAYS the man. She is ALWAYS the girl....It's not even open for discussion. I'm the man so I am the top, period.

braveman, well said!

[MrFanti]

More power to all the women in this thread that desire their men to be tops :cool:

[TS Lola London]

Within My own relationships I don't top. Its not because "I want my man to be a man". Whatever the hell that means. I'm just not into it. The best sex I ever had was when a guy picked me up and lick my whole body for like 15 min and then fucked me silly. The shit was like extra strength aspirin for Gender Dysporia.

Then I found out he was a gay guy only into feminine males and he found out that I was a t-girl. Sooooooo yeah. LOL

[nysprod]

I would like to know what the ts porn stars think of this, as they do it all the time in their movies. If they don't like topping then they are completely lying to everyone just to make a buck , and that completely goes against your cause of being feminine.

Isn't this more like acting/performing, like Tom Cruise really isn't on a Mission Impossible?

[MrFanti]

Within My own relationships I don't top. Its not because "I want my man to be a man".

You go girl! :pumped:
Your perspective seems to be alignment with some other women that posted within this thread - i.e., the women top for business purposes but in their intimate personal lives, the women prefer men who are tops.