Why isn't your avatar a pic of you?

[TJ347]

I know that there are many reasons a person might not use a pic of themselves in their avatar, ranging from being afraid someone they know might see it here and they'd thus be outed as being attracted to transsexuals, to simply not having a pic to put up and not thinking it worth the bother to do so.

What I want to know is why it is, if you don't have a pic of yourself up, that you don't. I know this has been talked about a bit before, but it seems this is an issue that is frequently brought up by different girls, and I just want to find out what people who operate incognito have to say on the matter.

[TJ347]

Okay, so with so many people wanting to get things started, I've belatedly come to put my two cents in...

I've sent my pic to a few people here, but have never put up a pic publicly due to the fact that I don't see it being a smart move for a number of reasons. The primary reason is that, like my address, it's not something I feel everybody and their mother ought to have access to. The people I enjoy communicating with largely know what I look like, and if I am comfortable enough with other people, I have no problem sharing a pic. However, what purpose would it serve for me to put a pic out there for all and sundry? Surely we've all seen people make that move only to have it quickly become something they regret. That's why so many people say that they once put a pic up and won't do it again, proof positive that it's something you might want to think about before you make that move.

Now, some will say that they put their pics out there, and therefore everyone else should do the same. That's like saying that because you enjoy smoking Winstons, everybody else should smoke Winstons. No, I will smoke my Newports, thank you. When it comes to making decisions on what I want to do and what I don't want to do, I'm the one who will make those decisions; I won't be led along by what the majority has decided. And that, in a nutshell, is my reasoning for not posting a public pic. So... anyone else want to say something, or shall we just let this thread die?

[TJ347]

I've heard different ladies say they think most guys who don't have a pic here don't have one because they don't want somebody they know to find out they're a member of a transsexual forum. I'd bet that's true in a large percentage of cases.

[TJ347]

And that's another good reason.

[mbf]

I am darn ugly. thats why I keep you humle and brave souls out there in HA-land from experiencing an optical shock which is inevitably if I used a pic of my trainwreck-face as an avatar.

instead, I ve chosen one that is very close to my real self.

former secretary of state, Henry Kissinger, inspecting some yet unknown blonde territory

[mbf]

the mystery of the double post

[TJ347]

I am darn ugly. thats why I keep you humle and brave souls out there in HA-land from experiencing an optical shock which is inevitably if I used a pic of my trainwreck-face as an avatar.

Certainly another good reason! mbf, while that's funny as hell, I don't know if you meant it to be. Regardless, I'm sure it's not half as bad as you think.

[dreamer]

I would if I could --but I don't know how ---

[alphanumeric]

I would if I could --but I don't know how ---
Ditto...

[TJ347]

Are you guys serious? I mean, really? C'mon...

[Castor_Troy05]

Well, mine is, so I guess I can't really comment in this thread


*backs out slowly*

[Jericho]

I'm a guy, no-one want's to see my picture plastered across their screen! :?

[BeardedOne]

Well, mbf already used the train-wreck excuse, so I'll just confess to being so fugly that your eyeballs would likely melt a la Raiders of the Lost Ark. :shock:

Besides, as in any venue where avatars are used, people choose them as an expression of themselves and their interests. Mine, an image of Norton I, Emperor of the United States and Protector of Mexico, shows that I am an excentric with delusions of grandeur and have a high likelihood of wearing a funny hat at a party.

On other forums I have avatars of Czar Nicholas II, Gomez Addams, Inspector Clousseau, and one of my actual self...Wearing a funny hat.

[tsntx]

bc im too ugly to use my real picture... so i use this gg sluts pic i found on myspace

[mbf]

I am darn ugly. thats why I keep you humle and brave souls out there in HA-land from experiencing an optical shock which is inevitably if I used a pic of my trainwreck-face as an avatar.

Certainly another good reason! mbf, while that's funny as hell, I don't know if you meant it to be. Regardless, I'm sure it's not half as bad as you think.

you have no idea TJ347

I was such an ugly baby, they had to hire blind nurses back at the birth clinic...

then, they wanted to have a photo. a war-photographer showed up, looked at me, ran and became a monk.

a paperbag with two holes cut out has been my best friend since then

[TheOne1]

because photoshoppin' only does so much.. :sadcry

[CORVETTEDUDE]

I've been operating in fairly strict secrecy most of my life(job related). That's not going to change any time soon. Sorry. :shrug

[pot]

Bc the pix will be all black as there are no light in the closet....

[peggygee]

I'm going to have to call bravo sierra on some of these excuses,
though I will admit that some of them are incredibly creative.
Have some of y'all thought about writing fiction as you have
great imaginations. :?

I will concede though that I have known people who have posted
their photos, only to be subjected to great ridicule during a flame
war.

I truly don't feel that was right. :smh

Resorting to argumentem ad hominem (attack against the person)
strikes me as cowardly. And if you must disagree, ideally it is on
issues, not physical attributes.

However I would like to address the converse of the original point.
Why do I have photos on a transgendered adult oriented site.

For quite a while I struggled with having my photo on various forums.
Much like many of you, I didn't want my photo to be used against me
in a flame war, or attack on my positions.

But quite frankly I have a healthy self esteem, and attacks by others
don't negatively impact it. Which isn't to say that words don't sometimes
hurt me, but I consider the source, and for the most part move on.

What about being plastered all over the internet, and pronouncing to all
my transtatus. I wil share with you that in the real world I tend to lead
a fairly stealthy life, I don't announce to all that I am a transsexual.

But in the same breath, I am not ashamed of my herstory, and of being
a transwoman.

Which leads me to my final poiint, if we are going to end the shame and
discrmination that comes with being associated with the transcommunity
we each are going to need to 'man or woman up'.

To that end I have spoken with my family and friends and have discussed
with them how do they feel about my increasingly public activist role. They
each have given me their blessings, now it is up to me to have the
courage of my convictions.

[TomSelis]

I think for most people the reasons will vary. Before I go into reasons, I'm going to state that an easy remedy for that is to just ask to see someone's pic through a PM if it's that serious of an issue. I feel like the little boy from "The Emperor's New Clothes" for having to say that.

The second thing (which is in itself a reason) is that people have a inclination to be silly on the internet, and I believe actions speak louder than words so seeing a person in real life goes much farther because people are less likely to say something stupid in your face.

Reasons:

1) I think the number one reason is job safety. Since I'm the one paying my mortgage and other bills, losing my job over my pic being posted here is not an option. I've literally seen three people lose their job over a myspace page or lifestyle choice. It doesn't happen like "We've seen your myspace page, you're fired!" either.

I've seen people get railroaded and blackballed, nasty things placed in mailboxes over the silliest things, like holding a beer or kissing another girl or having a rainbow flag up. Some of us work in conservative environments.

There's a lot of people that view this page that don't post. And they aren't going to verbally confront you about your presence here. They will do it in other ways.

2) Much of a lesser reason, but still valid. This isn't exactly an environment where you would want to post your pic. Clowning and jokes, sure, that's an issue. But when I first got here I saw how vicious people could be when someone (I think it was a girl) posted a pic of a guy. Who knows what else they did with that pic.

So, like I said in the beginning, actions speak louder than words. I don't have a problem being seen in public with a TS, that includes going to the movies, dinner or even walking down the street. Which is more than a lot of guys that do post their pics can honestly say.

[Quinn]

Those whom I wish to know what I look like know what I look like, usually because they've had dealings with me in person.

-Quinn

[phxguy]

Under no circumstances will I ever post my pic here, because what if a friend or a prospective employer sees it?

Also, in case I get into a flame war with anybody here, I don't want some poster making nasty comments about my looks etc.

For those reasons, I'm never posting my picture here.

[mbf]

I'm going to have to call bravo sierra on some of these excuses,
though I will admit that some of them are incredibly creative.
Have some of y'all thought about writing fiction as you have
great imaginations. :?



:lol: I have actually already earned money due to my writing "skills"

anywa ys, back to the topic: I have posted my damn nose-ear-eyes-mouth-hair-carrying device AKA face on here, its no big deal. I just think an avatar of Henry Kissinger staring at some busty blondes rack is way funnier than my unspectacular face.

oh, and some might think: "hey, if I use my face on my avatar, there will be some ts-ladies on here who I would like to score with thinking I am a "chaser" :twisted: :lol:

[tsntx]

Bc the pix will be all black as there are no light in the closet....


best comment here! :claps :claps :claps :claps :claps :claps :claps

[Realgirls4me]

Because posting a picture of myself here -- or anywhere on the internet -- is akin to leaving your car keys in the ignition of your car while parked in the hood. One never knows where it will end up, what it might be involved in, or what will become of it. There are enough posters here who know what I look like anyway.

... I have traveled the country to meet up with fellow posters from political sites who share the same points of view, and I doubt I knew what 95 percent of them looked like before we met in person. Not posting one's picture is par for the course on most sites, be they political or porn related. There's just no need for it.

[scorpion]

No It aint mee on my avatar. But I found one who is real close.
I know many of you dont like it but its meant to symbolise mee and my personality.

[hwbs]

im not here trying to use this as a personals site..i have no reason to...

[manbearpig]

An avatar can be representative of you without actually being a picture of you. But I see why some people might not want to post pictures online in general. I just recently found someone using one of my drawings as their avatar lol I guess I should be flattered.

As for my reason, I hate taking pictures. There are barely any pictures on my Myspace. Though if someone were so inclined to find out what I looked like they could just ask. Or stalk me on myspace lol. I generally only make it a point to send a picture to someone I see myself making an effort to get to know better.

[BlackAdder]

my pic is me.

Nothing to hide an i currently dont have to kiss an employers ass.

[TsVanessa69]

Mine is me!! and another post uses my avatar too.
Guess I got lucky when I was looking thru avatars. There I was, LOL

[Somedude21]

Mine is of me. At first it wasn't, but then Hara (I think) convinced me to use the picture of me as an avatar. And here we are.

[62des]

Why should it be? Its optional and shouldn't even be a question of why it isn't. I could ask why do you have a pic in your avatar when you could leave it blank. I don't use avatar pics on any website simply because I think its a waste of time. Also I don't see a reason to use a pic cz I ain't tryin to find a date or anything.

[Adultlexicon]

i use this picture of this random guy because i am a world famous actor
and dont wanna reveal my identity, besides nobody would believe its really me anyway

mr Pitt

[Silcc69]

Mine is of me. At first it wasn't, but then Hara (I think) convinced me to use the picture of me as an avatar. And here we are.


U kinda remind me of Dale Gribble from King of the Hill.

I go to other message boards (non sexual) and I don't post my pic. I've also seen one avatar which I hated and I think everybody hated it.

[ed_jaxon]

Mine is me but I choose not to show the face.

[Hara_Juku Tgirl]

Mine's of myself. I dont see why I should hide or anything! LOL ;)

~Kisses.

HTG

[sparky357153]

I tried once...I gave up..... Can some one help me make my pic my avatar? :evil:

[McB]

How do you know this isn't me?

[south ov da border]

just don't have any pix...

[Harvey Byrdman]

Mine is me.

PS: Hara, if I looked that good from behind I would put my picture up too. :shock:

[Fox]

I've had mine up because I simply don't care, so I figured why not. If someone I know recognizes me I'll give them a cookie and leave it at that.

Besides, the chances of someone recognizing you on this site is so remote, I don't consider it worth the paranoia. And if they do recognize you, that would mean they'd have to admit to coming here, outing themselves. I think it's only a problem if you let it become one.

[Rico]

This is an old thread but I'm new to this website so I'd like to let all the girls know that the pic/avatar I use is me!

[LBCDO]

I really dont care, but its never been requested. I use tons of message boards and none of them have my pic. My IM avatar isnt my pic, and a lot of people have that name.

But then, im painfully honest about a lot of romps and TS adventures Ive had, and I had a lot of people hate on me and use details from one TS with others that I knew. I dont want to use any names, but its someone who was well known in ATL as I was. Then Ive had a couple girls get on see what I posted and yell at me about it [Why you putting our business out in the street?] Katie from black tgirls always seems to catch me...

Anyway, isnt selective anonyminity the keystone of the internet? I dont mind being with the girls out in the open, not a problem, but I dont want to just throw my face out there too. I dont know if any of this makes sense...

[Hara_Juku Tgirl]

Mine is me.

PS: Hara, if I looked that good from behind I would put my picture up too. :shock:

Aww thanks. :oops:

~Kisses.

HTG

[Rogers]

Any thoughts of me putting a pic of myself on this site went 100 miles out the window when a certain crazy poster got banned. This place can be very combatative to say the least.