Drag Queen Hookers and Homer in a dress

[peggygee]

I was talking with a few people today, and the topic of transsexuals
came up. In the course of the conversation it came out as to how
they perceived transwomen.

Basically, they thought of us as;

'Homers in dresses'.

http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l2/magi43/dddddd.jpg

perpetual guests on the Murray http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l2/magi43/maurybouf1.jpg or
Springer shows. http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l2/magi43/springer31.jpg

And then the one that really kicked me in the stomach,

'DRAG QUEEN HOOKERS'

Now this wasn't the most PC or knowledgeable bunch of folks, but there
was a fair cross section of folks, different age ranges, races.

I did my best to re-educate them, without outting myself or 'catching a
case', but it was futile.

I know better, I know that we are represented in all sectors of society.

But it's interesting that's how many in society see us.

Though I wonder if that's what some transwomen
see when they look in the mirror, or at each other.

http://i92.photobucket.com/albums/l2/magi43/wommir.jpg

[DavidLynch]

Great post Peggy. Eventually with time, these notions shall repair.

[sucka4chix]

Great post Peggy. Eventually with time, these notions shall repair.
Maybe but I doubt it. People are influenced by what they see, especially on television. Put something on TV and people will bow down to it and accept it as credible----- have karaoke at the mall,it's a joke. Have karaoke on TV and it's a phenomenon called American Idol. So as long as we have Springer and Maury and Homers in skirts in the media, the image most people have won't change. We on this forum take the TG world for granted, but the average person knows nothing about it.
Also you have the squeaky wheel syndrome where the object that makes the most noise gets the attention. An intelligent beautiful mild mannered TG that represents well, will not garner attention. But a flamboyant or unattractive or criminal or drag queen hooker type will. So that's what the average person will think about. It's just like hip-hop conjures up images of violent thugs with a bunch of bling---- that's the flamboyant, loud element that grabs all the attention, the proverbial red car!

[LG]

It will take time to change these stereotypes. Shows like Jerry Springer and Maury Povich help to engender and strengthen these stereotupes but the girls often need to get out there on these shows because it might be useful to them personally- there's no such thing as bad publicity.

Then there are the countless comedy drag shows, often performed by gay men with no interest in become transgendered, which encourage people to laugh at transgenders. That doesn't help the cause a bit.

Finally, because society is so unaccepting, men who feel transgendered might think twice about taking charge of their lives and often put the whole thing up until a later stage in life when they have drummed up the courage or quite simply can't go on lying to themselves. Thus, a lot of transexuals complete their transformation late, after they already have all their secondary sexcual characteristics and possess a male physique. The whole cost of having it all done can be exorbitant and it might seem sensible to take shortcuts. Hence, I think some transexuals may still look very masculine (although some who completed their transformation in their 30s and later actually look amazing as well).

And of course some men are big boned, have big hands and protruding Adam's apples or just don't look too good to begin with. When they become M2F transexuals they may look far from perfect.

As for the drag queen hookers, I'm not sure where that comes from, although a high proportion of pre-ops seem to be escorts, in porn or both, simply becuase- I think- this is the best (or easiest) way to bring in the cash to pay for all the changes they want done. They are feeding an industry, there is nothing wrong with escorting. And what people don't realise is that most of these girls are gorgeous and "unclockable" at first sight by 90% of the population.

Sorry for the random "stream of conciousness" points I make, but I think these are the reasons behind the misconceptions. People don't get to find out about the beautiful girls or the successful girls like Roberta Close, Bibi Anderson, Harisu, Jenny Hiloudaki or Dana International, but get the impression that transexuals, transvestites and crossdressers are the same thing, I think.

How do you mend this? By supporting the transgender community and helping transwomen fulfill their dreams, both of becoming women but also of getting themseleves a good career and finding their way in life. People like you, Peggy, do more than most, but more is needed.

I would also like to see male movie stars and sportsmen coming out openly and saying they are admirers of transwomen and also to see transwomen succeeding in life and promoting transgender rights. That could help.

Just my two cents.

[peggygee]

Gentlemen, thank you for your responses and your input.

I must say that this has given me greater insight into your
plight as to when it comes to being in a relationship with
transwomen.

If you were to tell your family or friends that you were
interested in transwomen or in a relationship with a TS,
I can see the negative ramifications and consequences
that this might have, if these are the primary mages that
are conjured up.

Thus I can more fully commiserate and empathize with you
in your reluctance at revealing your attractions.

As to the ladies, perhaps we have some work to do?

[lisaparadise]

we have came along way in the last 10 or so years and we have alot to overcome no doubt but i think we will all agree were in the right direction,ps.springer is a freak i hope he chokes on a dq and i dont mean dairy queen

[BrendaQG]

:-|

Things will never chage too much. Say what you want about "identity" the fact is we are a sexual micro minority. Like other such minorities, we are fair game for things like that. Sterotypes and explotation.

Things have changed for the better but further change is indered by the fact that some of us are indeed look no better than "Homer in a dress", or have been on Maury, or have had to hook at some point just to make ends meet.

So what would have to change is the reality that many of us live in. A reality that is not a "transsexual womans success story" but more a story of pure basic survival. Survival in a hostile world.

Trust me the high road has it's pitfalls, much less money and all the consequences.

[crayons]

peggygee: you said it was strange how society looks at transwomen and I personally think it's what transwomen project towards society.
Here is what am getting at:
I was once talking to a friend about a tgirl we both knew. Now this girl is very extravagant in how she dresses, how loud she is etc. Think fabulous Xtravaganza from Paris is Burning multiplied to the 10th power.
When she goes out, she projects a certain image (from the clothing to her actions etc). I don't know whether she escorts, but it's unlikely anyone would think she's got an office job.
By nature- people HAVE TO JUDGE. I think it's an impossiblity in the human gene to draw up a conclusion about something- being that we are so curious about EVERYTHING- and hence, humans will nitpick every little detail and draw up a conclusion.
The reason for this classification of Springer guests comes from the projection of transwomen being extravagant, divas, flashy etc. This attitude has been filtered into the main-stream conscious that it has began to personify many girls even when they may not be a certain way.
The same can be said about black males. Not all black males listen to hiphop or dress in baggy clothes and bling their necks with car emblem medallions- but most likely and in many situtations, some of which I've witnessed, the classification has been made.
Nowadays, the media has infected such a pretencious code of ethics and behavioral patterns that it has began to shape who we (the Ameircan populous) behave. Ofcourse not all, but many- hence the term "they hate us" to describe how a majority of foreigners look towards Americans.
I don't think it's a matter of the work that needs to be done so much as the education that needs to be taught.

[ToyBoy6669]

Ah people will turn around; I was just talking with someone about Tula, from the bond fame. Hell the most popular "Lady" in main stream porn is a Transgender, at least according to sales, I'm told.

not that Porn is widely excepted by main stream society, but you know what I mean

[The Truth]

I seriously doubt people in general will be able to accept others who are considered different. If we can't get pass the color of the skin, which comes naturally, how are we going to expect people to accept someone who has chosen to transform into the person he/she really wants to be. I just don't see it happening.

I am not saying that I have given up hope, but all we can do is try to chance one person at a time. That would take a lot of time. I doubt I will see it in my lifetime.

[Kabuki]

Not all black males listen to hiphop or dress in baggy clothes and bling their necks with car emblem

Bling with car emblems? That's so 1989...lol. I just had to say something.

[crayons]

Bling with car emblems? That's so 1989...lol. I just had to say something.

It is? :cry:

[peggygee]

I don't think it's a matter of the work that needs to be done so much as the education that needs to be taught.

Great response.

I have a somewhat rhetorical question.

To whom is this education you speak of, taught?

To society, to transwomen, or both?

[peggygee]

:-|

Things will never chage too much. Say what you want about "identity" the fact is we are a sexual micro minority. Like other such minorities, we are fair game for things like that. Sterotypes and explotation.

Things have changed for the better but further change is indered by the fact that some of us are indeed look no better than "Homer in a dress", or have been on Maury, or have had to hook at some point just to make ends meet.

So what would have to change is the reality that many of us live in. A reality that is not a "transsexual womans success story" but more a story of pure basic survival. Survival in a hostile world.

Trust me the high road has it's pitfalls, much less money and all the consequences.

Brenda, I have to beg to differ.

In my lifetime I have seen things change dramatically.

As such I could never embrace a 'victim mentality'. I am a firm believer
that I am the Captain of my ship, and the Mistress of my destiny.

I've never allowed myself to be discriminated against as a Black person, a
woman, or as a transwoman.

Actually, I would relish someone attempting to deter me in the pursuit
of my goals, guess it's my love of a good fight.

Also, a few responders have mentioned that additional change is required.

How does this change come about, how does it manifest itself?

[crayons]

Everyone. Both transwomen and society. I don't believe society really knows who transwomen are. They think they do from what they see and their own conclusions, but I believe they see them as an enigmatic puzzle. This causes friction between society and transwomen which thus causes the stereotyping.
I believe if there was an education and reflection on who we are, who we all are regardless of race, sex, religious background etc, there would be a more harmonious relationship.
Currently the dogma dictated by the media is so closeminded it harbors on conspiracy- and it's depressing to know there are some who will believe it.

[crayons]

Also, a few responders have mentioned that additional change is required.

How does this change come about, how does it manifest itself?

I think for the change to happen, shit has to hit the fan. People have to be tired of the order of things so they can actually change it and try something else. Right now, people are too disconnected to care. It's a shame really when you see them walking around so huddled by technology that they fail to realize the complexity that imprisons them.