Is it worth it?

[demmie]

Alright, I was wondering, is it worth it, losing everything, and actually SWITCHING genders?

You know, losing what you were born with?

Whether it's penis or vagina, is a transsexual ever at a point in their life where they feel comfortable with their life?

What is the meaning of life to a transsexual?

And, when everything has been done and over with, when you're like, 57, will you be glad that you had it done?

Or will you regret spending all that money on something that's high-maintenance, and has to pretty much be "renewed"? (i.e.=image)

[peggygee]

Few are chosen, and even fewer get to their
destination.

Many may have in their minds, hearts and souls, the
thirst to see their dream come to fruition. However
for a variety of reasons most don’t make it.

For those that do, was it worth it.

Was it worth all the pain, both emotional and physical?
Were the blood, sweat and tears and untold anguish
worth it?

For me, un-questionably, yes.

The person that I was before my transition wasn’t a
very happy person, I daresay I was an evil, malevolent,
insecure, self-centered bastard.

I was often mean and hateful to those around me. I hurt
those that cared about me in un-told ways.

The damage that I performed wasn’t just directed outward
either, but in self destructive behavior of which drugs and
alcohol abuse were some of the ways I tried to ease a tortured
soul.

Of course as with any life there were highs with the abysmal
lows, but through it all there was one constant, and that was
to have my body be congruent with my mind.

As you may have a sense, transitioning is a difficult and painful
process, but it was one that I knew I had to embark upon.

Three decades ago I began the physical steps of my journey.
For two decades I lived as a pre op, with an eye to the culmination
of my life long dream which was to have SRS.

Throughout the period I experienced many things, much as I
had before the transition, for me, my life has never had a dull
moment. Like many other people I have made some very good
decisions and made some very bad decisions.

Also during that period I still struggled with substance abuse, as
I worked on the vestiges of my past..
.
Through a lot of prayer, therapy, and help from my family, ten
years ago, I was able to put the drugs and alcohol down, hopefully
for the last time. I was also able to complete my SRS.

Now, my relationship with my family is very good. I am a
devoted daughter to my Mother. As a son, let’s just say
I didn’t do a very good job, with my Father we are still
a work in progress. I have friends that depend on me,
and I on them.

I have a career, enjoy my work immensely, am compensated,
fairly well. I travel, get to do things which bring me much joy,
life is good.

Had I remained in my birth sex, there might have been a
different ending, for I was clearly headed for prison or the
grave.

For the life that I have now I am very grateful, indeed I am
blessed and highly favored.

Many times this is what drives my writing as I realize that
there is someone, somewhere who is struggling with feelings
of hopelessness, and helplessness. They may feel as if they
will never see their life come together as they had hoped it
would.
.
They may be battling with addictions, depression, or other
demons, to them I say “hold on there is light at the end of
the tunnel, and it’s not an oncoming train”. :)

Then too, I write as a sort of penance, perhaps in the hopes
that I may be able to undo many of the wrong things that I
have done in life to myself and others.

Perhaps the God of my understanding and the many people
that kept me alive and nursed me back to health will feel that
I was worth the effort.

Thus to answer your question, simply, was it worth it?

Yes.

[yodajazz]

Thank you, Peggy that could not have been better said. It is a must read for everyone who visits this forum, and anyone interested in the TS phenomenon.

I would like to add that this is site where adults can express their sexual tastes, the TS experience reaches to almost as aspects of life. If one visits the site by Lynn Conway, http://ai.eecs.umich.edu/people/conway/TSsuccesses/TSsuccesses.html
you will see that it is not a sex oriented site, but one dedicated to showing that transsexuals have made successful lives and careers throughout society. These include doctors, lawyers, computer programmers, housewives with children, all aspects of non porn entertainment, plus many more. And then you should consider that there are many TS’s who are ‘stealth’, that is not publicly telling others about their gender status.

The ones on Lynn’s site are doubly brave to me. That is they made the difficult physical transition and then publicly proclaimed there status in order to help others like them.

Of course in any area of life, you will find people who are not successful in their undertakings. Being a TS and transitioning has so many possible dangers, possible rejections, and people who want to use them for sex and then discard them.

Hopefully, we can enjoy ourselves here, but let also people have their dignity.

There are people that think that it is just wrong to be a TS. I don’t think that they see that it is ultimately enriching the human experience. It is a clear demonstration that the mind is the ultimate director of human experience, not the body. Both can be changed, to find greater happiness.

[demmie]

I wish more transsexuals were like you, peggygee.

And to the many more years you have...voila. Tre Magnifique. You have actually done it. It's my pleasure to meet you.

yodajazz, thanks. I learned a lot today.

[yodajazz]

Few are chosen, and even fewer get to their
destination.

Many may have in their minds, hearts and souls, the
thirst to see their dream come to fruition. However
for a variety of reasons most don’t make it.

For those that do, was it worth it.

Was it worth all the pain, both emotional and physical?
Were the blood, sweat and tears and untold anguish
worth it?

For me, un-questionably, yes.

The person that I was before my transition wasn’t a
very happy person, I daresay I was an evil, malevolent,
insecure, self-centered bastard.

I was often mean and hateful to those around me. I hurt
those that cared about me in un-told ways.

The damage that I performed wasn’t just directed outward
either, but in self destructive behavior of which drugs and
alcohol abuse were some of the ways I tried to ease a tortured
soul.

Of course as with any life there were highs with the abysmal
lows, but through it all there was one constant, and that was
to have my body be congruent with my mind.

As you may have a sense, transitioning is a difficult and painful
process, but it was one that I knew I had to embark upon.

Three decades ago I began the physical steps of my journey.
For two decades I lived as a pre op, with an eye to the culmination
of my life long dream which was to have SRS.

Throughout the period I experienced many things, much as I
had before the transition, for me, my life has never had a dull
moment. Like many other people I have made some very good
decisions and made some very bad decisions.

Also during that period I still struggled with substance abuse, as
I worked on the vestiges of my past..
.
Through a lot of prayer, therapy, and help from my family, ten
years ago, I was able to put the drugs and alcohol down, hopefully
for the last time. I was also able to complete my SRS.

Now, my relationship with my family is very good. I am a
devoted daughter to my Mother. As a son, let’s just say
I didn’t do a very good job, with my Father we are still
a work in progress. I have friends that depend on me,
and I on them.

I have a career, enjoy my work immensely, am compensated,
fairly well. I travel, get to do things which bring me much joy,
life is good.

Had I remained in my birth sex, there might have been a
different ending, for I was clearly headed for prison or the
grave.

For the life that I have now I am very grateful, indeed I am
blessed and highly favored.

Many times this is what drives my writing as I realize that
there is someone, somewhere who is struggling with feelings
of hopelessness, and helplessness. They may feel as if they
will never see their life come together as they had hoped it
would.
.
They may be battling with addictions, depression, or other
demons, to them I say “hold on there is light at the end of
the tunnel, and it’s not an oncoming train”. :)

Then too, I write as a sort of penance, perhaps in the hopes
that I may be able to undo many of the wrong things that I
have done in life to myself and others.

Perhaps the God of my understanding and the many people
that kept me alive and nursed me back to health will feel that
I was worth the effort.

Thus to answer your question, simply, was it worth it?

Yes.

Bump! It's been over a year since she wrote this, but PeggyGee's answer (essay) is a classic, that many would benefit from reading.

[mark22]

Everyone please be more tolerant when things don't go exactly as you planned when meeting a girl.

Cheers.