Good vs. bad Touching

[suckseed]

No, this is just about adults!

Recently, an old friend who happens to be a gorgeous woman was complaining to me about how her boyfriend was kind of crowding her, always wanting to touch her or hold her. She said she needed more space than that.
I thought at the time that while I understood her point, I couldn't exactly blame the guy. Then two nights ago, this woman I work with made the same observation about her man.
Now, I'm not the excessive PDA type, and I certainly don't need to constantly touch a girlfriend, but I like to sometimes, and not just sexually.
Anybody have an opinion on this?

[DJ_Asia]

Well man I think unless its overt fondling and petting thats these guys are doing, I think it boils down to a person to person basis.
Everybody has their own definition of whats inappropriate and also have varying degrees of need or desire for physical contact.
Some folks are always in need of holding hands,hugging,kissing etc,while others just simply like their own personal space.

[peggygee]

When I am talking with someone I may touch their arm or non sexual part of their body to make a point or to show empathy with them.

In a relationship, here and there a bit of PDA, with me is fine. Too much strikes me as somewhat juvenile, and tends to give off a insecure 'vibe' about the relationship.

Of course when, love is new with a person, you can't seem to get enough of them.

I am a kinetic person, I talk with my hands and body a lot. I also talk fast, think fast, and move fast. :peanutbutter

If someone is all over me, it inhibits my moblity. :roll:

So, my usual long winded answer, is give me some space. :smh

:2cent

[KidInACandyStore]

Varies by person, by culture, and by sex. Personally, over-emphasizing my need for personal space means I'm not ready to fully commit. It's a great way to passively send a message without being confrontational.

Women are fickle. Show em too much attention and they need space. Ignore em and they start to worry, "What's wrong? Am I ugly?"


Just go for the middle, but when in doubt turn down the attention a little.

[BeardedOne]

Women are fickle. Show em too much attention and they need space. Ignore em and they start to worry, "What's wrong? Am I ugly?"

"Fickle"? Hmm...I guess that is a more diplomatic way of saying "psychotic". :lol:

I'm a touchy-feelie kinda guy and my last 'lover' used to give out a distinct vibe that I was getting too close most of the time. So, I toned it down and things went pretty well. Right up until I got that series of four little e-notes, in as many days, that essentially said "How ya doin?", "I don't like you anymore", "Fuck off!", and "May you lie dead in the frozen tundra until the ice weasels come to devour your corpse".

To this day not a one of anyone close to this scenario saw the brick coming until after it hit me. A few weeks later, a mutual friend (Who no longer speaks to me because he must have a thing for sticking around with psychotics) told me that one of her complaints (None of which she chose to share with me) was that I didn't show enough PDA.

:shrug

There is no right answer to this question. And the one person that =can= answer it for you, ain't talkin'.

Good luck.